第37章 咨询服务
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第37章 咨询服务
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Chapter 37—Counseling
§3
顾问尤其需要以基督的心为心——那些接受了指导或顾问职位的人,尤其应感到自己需要在各方面表现基督的美德。我们在与别人打交道时,总要做忠实的人,不该粗鲁无礼。我们所必须交往的人乃是主所买来的产业。我们的口中不可说出轻率、傲慢专横的话语。弟兄们,要把人当作人来对待,而不要把人当作可以随心使唤的仆人。放纵苛刻专横精神的人,最好像摩西那样成为牧羊的人,学习怎样做一个真正的牧人。摩西在埃及所获得的,是做一个强大政治家和军队统帅的经验,但他没有学到真正伟大的必要功课。他需要在较低级岗位上的经验,好成为一位看管人,温柔地对待每一只动物。他看守叶忒罗的羊群,引起了他对羊和羔羊的同情心。他也学会了最温柔地关怀护卫上帝所创造之物。虽然它们不发声诉说所遭受的虐待,但它们的姿态会说明许多问题。上帝关怀祂所造的一切生物。摩西在这个较低的岗位上为上帝工作时,学会了做以色列温柔的牧人。--SpT-A5,18,19.{PaM 215.1}[1]
§4
Counselors especially need the mind of Christ—Especially should those who have accepted the position of directors or counselors feel that they are required to be in every respect Christian gentlemen. While in dealing with others we are always to be faithful, we should not be rude. The souls with whom we have to do are the Lord’s purchased possession, and we are to permit no hasty, overbearing expression to escape the lips. Brethren, treat men as men, not as servants, to be ordered about at your pleasure. He who indulges a harsh, overbearing spirit, might better become a tender of sheep, as did Moses, and thus learn what it means to be a true shepherd. Moses gained in Egypt an experience as a mighty statesman, and as a leader of the armies, but he did not there learn the lessons essential for true greatness. He needed an experience in more humble duties, that he might become a caretaker, tender toward every living thing. In keeping the flocks of Jethro, his sympathies were called out to the sheep and lambs, and he learned to guard these creatures of God with the gentlest care. Although their voice could never complain of mistreatment, yet their attitude might show much. God cares for all the creatures He has made. In working for God in this lowly station, Moses learned to be a tender shepherd for Israel.—Special Testimonies, Series A, 5:18, 19.?{PaM 215.1}[1]
§5
牧师需要了解各种性情的人--医师如何治疗肉身的疾病,牧师也当如何对待患罪病的人。永生怎样比今世更有价值,牧师的工作也照样比医师的工作更为重要。牧师需要应付各种性情的人。他的本分是要熟悉听他教训的家庭中每一分子,以便确定用什么方法最能感动他们朝着正确的方向前进。--GW338.{PaM 215.2}[2]
§6
The pastor needs to understand an endless variety of temperaments—As the physician deals with physical disease, so does the pastor minister to the sin-sick soul. And his work is as much more important than that of the physician as eternal life is more valuable than temporal existence. The pastor meets with an endless variety of temperaments, and it is his duty to become acquainted with the members of the families that listen to his teachings in order to determine what means will best influence them in the right direction.—Gospel Workers, 338.?{PaM 215.2}[2]
§7
以圣经为家庭的顾问--父母需要纠正,传道人需要纠正;他们需要有上帝在他们家中。如果他们想要有所改进,就必须让圣经在他们家中有其地位,并以之为他们的指南。他们必须教导儿女,圣经是上帝向他们所说的话,是要绝对服从的。他们应当耐心教导儿女,仁慈而不倦地教训他们应当如何生活,才能蒙上帝的喜悦。从这样的家庭出来的儿女,就能应付不信上帝者的诡辩。他们既已接受圣经为他们信仰的基础,他们的根基就不会被怀疑派的浪潮所动摇了。--PP143.{PaM 215.3}[3]
§8
【Family】
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The Word should be considered a family counselor—Parents need to reform; ministers need to reform; they need God in their households. If they would see a different state of things, they must bring His Word into their?families and must make it their counselor. They must teach their children that it is the voice of God addressed to them, and is to be implicitly obeyed. They should patiently instruct their children, kindly and untiringly teach them how to live in order to please God. The children of such a household are prepared to meet the sophistries of infidelity. They have accepted the Bible as the basis of their faith, and they have a foundation that cannot be swept away by the incoming tide of skepticism.—Patriarchs and Prophets, 143.?{PaM 215.3}[3]
§10
不要听被你吸引的妇女倾吐私人的烦恼和家庭的失望--妇女们已经被吸引到你面前,且已准备好向你耳中倾吐她们私人的烦恼和家庭的失望。你不应该听她们讲这些事,而要告诉她们:你自己只不过是一个犯错误的凡人;上帝才是她们的帮助者。--2MCP767.{PaM 216.1}[4]
§11
Do not listen to the private troubles and family disappointments of women attracted to you—Women have been attracted to you, and have been ready to pour into your ears their private troubles and family disappointments. You ought not to lend an ear to them, but tell them that you are yourself only an erring mortal; that God is their helper.—Mind, Character, and Personality 2:767.?{PaM 216.1}[4]
§12
如果一个妇女表示不合宜的倾心,及怨叹自己的丈夫不爱她,你切莫试图去填补这种空虚--那些站在圣台上的传道人,当是声名无玷的人;他们的生活应是无瑕无疵的,远绝一切污浊的气息。不可步上试探之途而置自己的名誉于险境。如果一个妇女恋恋不舍地握住你的手,应当快快收回来,并救她免得犯罪。她若表示不合宜的倾心,及怨叹自己的丈夫不爱她不同情她,你切莫试图去补足这种缺乏。在这种情形之下,你唯一安全而聪明之道,就是约束自己的同情心。这类情形真是不胜枚举。应当向这等人指出那背负重担的主,那诚实而安全的顾问。如果她已拣选基督为朋友,祂会赐她恩典,能受得起忽视而不埋怨;同时她应当向丈夫表示自己绝对的忠贞,使家庭的生活快乐可羡,殷勤尽力使他与自己相联。若她的全部努力仍属徒然而不蒙赏识,她就可从赐福之救赎主得到同情与援助。祂要帮助她背负一切的重担,并在灰心失意中安慰她。何时她去请求人充当那基督所愿随时充当的职务,她就是表示自己不信任耶稣了。在她埋怨之中,她便得罪了上帝。她最好是严格审查自己的心,看明是否有罪潜藏在心灵中。人若向别人求同情及接受非法的关心,在上帝之前他那样的心是不洁而有罪的。--5T598.{PaM 216.2}[5]
§13
If a woman manifests undue attention and mourns that her husband does not love her, do not try to supply this lack—Those who stand as ministers in the sacred desk should be men of blameless reputation; their lives should be spotless, above everything that savors of impurity. Do not place your reputation in jeopardy by going in the way of temptation. If a woman lingeringly holds your hand, quickly withdraw it and save her from sin. If she manifests undue affection and mourns that her husband does not love her and sympathize with her, do not try to supply this lack. Your only safe and wise course in such a case is to keep your sympathy to yourself. Such cases are numerous. Point such souls to the Burden Bearer, the true and safe Counselor. If she has chosen Christ as a companion, He will give her grace to bear neglect without repining; meanwhile she should diligently do all in her power to bind her husband to herself by strictest fidelity to him and faithfulness in making his home cheerful and attractive. If all her efforts are unavailing and unappreciated, she will have the sympathy and aid of her blessed Redeemer. He will help her to bear all her burdens and comfort her in her disappointments. She shows distrust of Jesus when she reaches for human objects to supply the place that Christ is ever ready to fill. In her repining she sins against God. She would do well to examine her own heart critically to see if sin is not lurking in the soul. The heart that thus seeks human sympathy and accepts forbidden attentions from any one is not pure and faultless before God.—Testimonies for the Church 5:598.?{PaM 216.2}[5]
§14
传道人为悲伤的求助者带来特别有意义的希望--在天上的气氛之中,没有痛苦存在的余地。在蒙赎之民的家乡决没有流泪,丧葬,以及缟素悲哀的表号。“城内居民必不说:我病了。其中居住的百姓,罪孽都赦免了”(赛33:24)。大量澎湃的喜乐之潮,必定长流不竭,愈来愈深。--9T286.{PaM 216.3}[6]
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【Grief】
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The minister offers grief counselees a special, significant hope—Pain cannot exist in the atmosphere of heaven. In the home of the redeemed there will be no tears, no funeral trains, no badges of mourning. “The inhabitant shall not say, I am sick: the people that dwell therein shall be forgiven their iniquity.” One rich tide of happiness will flow and deepen as eternity rolls on.—Testimonies for the Church 9:286.?{PaM 216.3}[6]
§17
那些没有表露出自己悲痛的人可能感受更深(怀爱伦说到她儿媳妇的去世)——可怜的威利是真正失去亲人的人。他从来没有表露出来,因此他将独自哀痛并且感受最深。我的心满是痛苦悲伤。--EGW88678.{PaM 217.1}[7]
§18
Those not demonstrative in their grief may feel it deeper?[Ellen White speaks of the death of her son’s wife]—Poor Willie is indeed bereaved. He never is demonstrative, therefore he will mourn alone and feel it deeper. My heart is sore and sad.—Ellen G. White 1888 Materials, 678.?{PaM 217.1}[7]
§19
悲伤会带来最强烈的沮丧(怀爱伦说到她第四个孩子、三个月大的约翰.赫伯特的夭折)--我们从葬礼回来后,我的家似乎孤独寂寞了。我觉得甘心接受上帝的旨意,但沮丧和忧郁停留在我身上。--1T246.{PaM 217.2}[8]
§20
Grief can make the strongest despondent?[Ellen White speaks of the death of her fourth child, three-month-old John Herbert]—After we returned from the funeral, my home seemed lonely. I felt reconciled to the will of God, yet despondency and gloom settled upon me.—Testimonies for the Church 1:246.?{PaM 217.2}[8]
§21
基督教能带来超越忧伤绝望的希望(怀爱伦说到她丈夫的去世)——即使我心碎了,也不会悲痛欲绝。我侍奉上帝,不是出于冲动,而是出于理智。我有一位救主,祂必作我在患难中随时的帮助。我是一个基督徒,深知我所信的是谁。祂希望我绝对毫不动摇地顺服。过度忧伤是上帝所不喜悦的。我要背起指定给我的十字架,完全跟从主。我决不容许自己忧伤过度。我决不要向病态忧郁的情绪屈服。我不怨天尤人,或不满上帝的安排。耶稣是我的救主。祂活着。祂绝不会撇下我,也不会丢弃我。”--TDG302.{PaM 217.3}[9]
§22
Christianity brings a hope that rises above despondency in grief?[Ellen White speaks of the death of her husband]—I shall give way to no outbursts of grief, if my heart breaks. I serve God, not impulsively, but intelligently. I have a Saviour who will be to me a very present help in time of trouble. I am a Christian. I know in whom I have believed. He expects from me implicit unwavering submission. Undue grief is displeasing to God. I take up my appointed cross and will follow the Lord fully. I will not give myself to abandonment of grief. I will not yield to a morbid and melancholy state of feeling. I will not complain or murmur at the providence of God. Jesus is my Saviour. He lives. He will never leave me nor forsake me.”—This Day With God, 302.?{PaM 217.3}[9]
§23
顾问不要替别人拿主意作判断--他行事不象一个明智的顾问,而是僭取了一位苛刻统治者的特权。每一次这种显示权威和高举自我的行为都是羞辱上帝的。主所使用从事祂圣工的人,决不可让任何靠自己的力量站立的人替他拿主意作判断。--TM491.{PaM 217.4}[10]
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【Limitations】
§25
Counselors should not be mind and judgment for others—Instead of acting as a wise counselor, he assumes the prerogatives of an exacting ruler. God is dishonored by every such display of authority and self-exaltation. No man standing in his own strength is ever to be mind and judgment for another man whom the Lord is using in His work.—Testimonies to Ministers and Gospel Workers, 491.?{PaM 217.4}[10]
§26
传道人可以发出劝勉但要向上帝求智慧——不要把你的困惑带到一位弟兄或传道人面前,而要在祷告中带到主面前。不要把传道人放在上帝应该在的位置。基督的传道人与他人是一样的。确实,他负有神圣的责任,但他不是没有错误的。他也被软弱所困,需要恩典和上帝的启迪。他需要属天的恩膏,以便成功地做他的工作。那些知道如何祷告、知道何为基督福音之邀请的人,若把他们的担子放在有限的人身上,就羞辱了上帝。一起商量总是对的,一起交谈也是对的。将任何事业中出现的困难向弟兄和传道人说明也是对的。但不要倚靠人得智慧。要向上帝求那从上头来的智慧。要请你的同工与你一起祷告,主就必实现祂的话:“无论在哪里,有两三个人奉我的名聚会,那里就有我在他们中间”(太18:20)。--YI1900.2.15{PaM 217.5}[11]
§27
Ministers may give counsel but seek wisdom from God—In the place of bearing your perplexities to a brother or a minister, take them to the Lord in prayer. Do not place the minister where God should be. The minister of Christ is like other men. True, he bears sacred responsibilities, but he is not infallible. He is compassed with infirmity, and needs grace and divine enlightenment. He needs the heavenly unction, in order to do his work with success. Those who know how to pray, who know what are the invitations of the gospel of Christ, show dishonor to God when they lay their burdens upon finite men. It is always right to counsel together; it is right to converse together; it is right to make the difficulties that present themselves in any enterprise plain before your brethren and your ministers. But do not depend upon man for wisdom. Seek God for the wisdom that comes from above. Ask your fellow laborers to pray with you; and the Lord will fulfill His Word, “Where two or three are gathered together in my name, there am I in the midst.”—The Youth’s Instructor, February 15, 1900.?{PaM 217.5}[11]
§28
信徒不要指望传道人取代基督作他们的向导和顾问--许多人指望他们的传道人把来自上帝的亮光带给他们,似乎以为这是比自己费心去找上帝更容易的办法。这种人损失很大。他们若愿意每天跟随基督,以祂为他们的向导和顾问,就会清楚地知道祂的旨意,从而获得一种有价值的经验。自称相信真理的弟兄们因为缺乏这种经验而行在别人点着的火光中;他们不熟悉上帝的灵,也不知道祂的旨意,所以很容易偏离他们的信仰。他们是不稳定的,因为他们倚靠别人为他们获得一种经验。主已经为亚当的每一个儿女作了充足的准备,要他们个别地获得对上帝旨意的认识,好完善基督徒品格,藉着真理得到洁净。上帝因那等自称跟从基督却对上帝的旨意或敬虔的奥秘没有经验上认识的人而受了羞辱。--2T644.{PaM 218.1}[12]
§29
Members should not expect their minister to replace Christ as their guide and counselor—Many look to their ministers to bring the light from God to them, seeming to think this a cheaper way than to be to the trouble of going to God for it themselves. Such lose much. If they would daily follow Christ and make Him their guide and counselor, they might obtain a clear knowledge of His will, and thus be gaining a valuable experience. For want of this very experience, brethren professing the truth walk in the sparks of others’ kindling; they are unacquainted with the Spirit of God and have not a knowledge of His will, and are therefore easily moved from their faith. They are unstable, because they trusted in others to obtain an experience for them. Ample provisions have been made for every son and daughter of Adam to obtain individually a knowledge of the divine will, to perfect Christian character, and to be purified through the truth. God is dishonored by that class who profess to be followers of Christ and yet have no experimental knowledge of the divine will or of the mystery of godliness.—Testimonies for the Church 2:644.?{PaM 218.1}[12]