第42章 夫妻的责任
§1
第42章 夫妻的责任
§2
Chap. 42 - Duties of the Husband and the Wife
§3
R弟兄：去年六月，我在异象中看到了你的情况。但我一直为工作所迫，以致不可能把主指示我看到的有关于个人情形的事都写出来。我希望在听到任何有关你的事之前，写出我不得不写的；因为撒但或许会向你的心暗示疑惑，这是他的工作。【2T.296.3】[1]
§4
Brother R: Last June your case was presented before me in vision. But I have been so constantly pressed with labor that I could not possibly write out the things shown me in regard to individual cases. I wish to write what I have to write, before I hear any account of matters in regard to your case; for Satan might suggest doubts to your mind. This is his work. {2T 296.3}[1]
§5
我蒙指示看到你过去的生活。上帝对你非常慈悲，祂光照你的眼睛，使你看明祂的真理；救你脱离你疑惑不定的危险处境；建立你的信心并使你的心关注祂圣言的永恒真理。祂坚固你的脚在那磐石上。你曾一度感激上帝并存心谦卑，但有一段时间你一直使自己与上帝隔绝。当你自视甚微时，你才蒙上帝喜爱。【2T.297.1】[2]
§6
I was pointed back to your past life and was shown that God had been very merciful to you in enlightening your eyes to see His truth, in rescuing you from your perilous condition of doubt and uncertainty, and in establishing your faith and settling your mind upon the eternal truths of His word. He established your feet upon the Rock. For a season you felt grateful and humble, but for some time you have been separating yourself from God. When you were little in your own eyes, then you were beloved of God. {2T 297.1}[2]
§7
音乐已经成为你的网罗。你为自尊自大所困扰。你很容易对自己的才能自视甚高。教别人音乐对你已经成为一种伤害。许多女子向你倾吐她们家庭的困难。这也成了对你的伤害，使你自高而且更加妄自尊大。【2T.297.2】[3]
§8
Music has been a snare to you. You are troubled with self-esteem; it is natural for you to have exalted ideas of your own ability. Teaching music has been an injury to you. Many women have confided their family difficulties to you. This has also been an injury to you. It has exalted you and led you to still greater self-esteem. {2T 297.2}[3]
§9
你在你家中的地位威严而且相当傲慢。你的妻子有些缺点，你觉察到了。这些缺点导致了不良的后果。她天生并不善于持家。她在这方面必须获得适当的教育和培训。她已取得了一些进步，但仍应恳切地求取更大的进步。她在持家和衣着上缺乏次序、品位、和整洁。她若在自己缺乏的这些事上训练自己，就必能得上帝的喜悦。她并不善于持家。她太容易屈服，不能坚持自己的决定。她被儿女的愿望和要求所左右，将她的判断屈从于他们的意见。她非但没有照自己的本分在这些方面力图改进，反倒喜欢能有机会或藉口摆脱家庭的操劳和责任，让别人去尽她家中的责任，而这些责任是她应该训练自己喜爱去尽的。她若不在这些方面训练自己，就无法尽为妻为母者的本分。她对自己缺乏信心。她是一个生性害羞、易于退缩的人，而且不信任自己。她认为自己做得很蹩脚，而这令她更加裹足不前。她需要鼓励，她需要温柔友爱的话语。她心地良善，温柔安静，主爱她。但她应作彻底的努力，力图更正这些使家庭不幸福的弊端。她经常练习这些事，便会增加她有能力正确履行家庭责任的自信。【2T.297.3】[4]
§10
In your own family you have occupied a dignified and rather haughty position. There are defects in your wife, of which you are aware. They have led to bad results. She is not naturally a housekeeper. Her education in this direction must be acquired. She has improved some, and should apply herself earnestly to make greater improvement. She lacks order, taste, and neatness in housekeeping and also in dress. It would be pleasing to God if she should train her mind upon these things wherein she lacks. She does not have good government in her family. She is too yielding, and fails to maintain her decisions. She is swayed by the desires and claims of her children, and yields her judgment to theirs. Instead of trying to improve in these respects, as it is her duty to do, she is glad of an opportunity or an excuse to release herself from home cares and responsibilities, and permits others to perform the duties in her family that she should educate herself to love to do. She cannot perform her part as a wife and mother until she shall educate herself in this direction. She lacks confidence in herself. She is timid and retiring, and distrustful of herself. She has a very poor opinion of what she does, and this discourages her from doing more. She needs encouragement; she needs words of tenderness and affection. She has a good spirit. She is meek and quiet, and the Lord loves her; yet she should make thorough efforts to correct these evils which tend to make her family unhappy. Practice in these things will give her confidence in her own ability to perform her duties aright. {2T 297.3}[4]
§11
你和你妻子有截然不同的天性。你喜爱次序和整洁，有良好的品位，相当好的管理能力。作为丈夫，你相当刻板严厉。你没能鼓励你妻子的信心和使她通晓家务。你妻子的缺点使你认为她不如你，也使她觉得你是这样看她的。但在上帝眼中，你妻子的地位却比你高。因为你所行的路在上帝面前弯曲乖僻。为了丈夫和儿女的缘故，也为其它原因，她应该力求纠正自己的缺点，改进她现在失败的那些事。如果她足够努力的话，她是能做到的。【2T.298.1】[5]
§12
You and your wife are opposite in your organizations. You love order and neatness, and have a nice taste, and quite good government. As a husband, you are rather stiff and stern. You fail to take a course to encourage confidence and familiarity in your wife. Her deficiencies have led you to regard her as inferior to yourself, and have also caused her to feel that you thus regard her. God esteems her more highly than yourself; for your ways are crooked before Him. For the sake of her husband and children, and for other reasons, she should seek to correct her deficiencies and to improve in those things wherein she now fails. She can do it if she will try hard enough. {2T 298.1}[5]
§13
上帝不喜悦任何一个人无序，懒散，缺乏彻底。这些缺点是严重的不幸，如果丈夫喜爱秩序，很有教养的儿女和井然有序的房间，这些缺点就会使丈夫和妻子断了感情。作妻子和母亲的人，若非雅爱秩序，端庄自重，好好持家，就决不能使家庭安乐幸福；因此，凡在这些要点上失败的人，应当立即着手在这方面训练自己，改善自己有最大缺欠的那些事。训练会对那些在这些基本资格上有缺乏的人很有造就。R姐妹向这些失败让步，以为自己此外不能做什么了。她做过一次尝试之后，若没在自己身上看到明确的改善，就灰心了。不可这样。她自己的幸福和她家人的幸福取决于她自己醒悟过来，恳切热心地作工，在这些事上作出明确的改革。她必须运用信心和决心；作个女人。她本性退避任何没有试过的事。而在她认为自己可以取得成功的事上，则没有任何一个人比她更欣然乐意去作。如果她在自己新的努力上失败，她必须试了又试。她能够获得她丈夫和她儿女的尊敬。【2T.298.2】[6]
§14
God is displeased with disorder, slackness, and a lack of thoroughness, in anyone. These deficiencies are serious evils and tend to wean the affections of the husband from the wife when the husband loves order, well-disciplined children, and a well-regulated house. A wife and mother cannot make home agreeable and happy unless she possesses a love for order, preserves her dignity, and has good government; therefore all who fail on these points should begin at once to educate themselves in this direction and cultivate the very things wherein is their greatest lack. Discipline will do much for those who are lacking in these essential qualifications. Sister R gives up to these failings, and thinks that she cannot do otherwise than she does. After she has made a trial, and fails to see decided improvement in herself, she is discouraged. This must not be. The happiness of herself and her family depend upon her arousing herself, and working with earnestness and zeal to make a decided reformation in these things. She must put on confidence and decision; put on the woman. Her nature is to shrink from anything untried. No one can be more ready and willing than she to do, where she thinks she can succeed. If she fails in her new effort, she must try, try again. She can earn the respect of her husband and children. {2T 298.2}[6]
§15
我蒙指示看到，R弟兄已因自高而跌倒。他在家中和对他妻子傲慢无礼、苛刻严厉。这使她与他隔绝。她感到无法接近他，她在婚姻生活中更像是一个孩子惧怕自己严厉威的父亲，而不像一个妻子。尽管她丈夫对她的信心缺乏鼓励，但她仍然爱他，尊重他，并把他当作偶像一样崇拜。我的弟兄，你应该努力鼓励你胆小、容易退缩的妻子倚靠你宽宏的爱情，而这会给你一个机会，用一种体贴亲爱的态度去更正你妻子的错误，你在尽力这么做时，还要鼓舞她对自己的信心。【2T.299.1】[7]
§16
I was shown that self-exaltation has caused Brother R to stumble. He has exercised a certain dignity, savoring of severity, in his family and toward his wife. This has shut her from him. She felt that she could not approach him, and has been in her married life, more like a child fearing a stern, dignified father, than like a wife. She has loved, respected, and idolized her husband notwithstanding his lack of encouraging her confidence. My brother, you should pursue a course that would encourage your timid, shrinking wife to lean upon your large affections, and this would give you a chance, in a delicate, affectionate manner, to correct the errors existing in her, as far as you are capable of so doing, and to inspire her with confidence in herself. {2T 299.1}[7]
§17
我蒙指示看到，你对你的妻子并没有你当有的爱。撒但在她的缺点和你的错误上占据了优势，他要力图毁灭你的家庭。你心里一想到你妻子便感到羞耻，你对她的尊重日渐减少，而她是你曾经起誓要珍重爱护的一位，只到死亡将你们分开。【2T.299.2】[8]
§18
I was shown that you had not possessed that love for your wife that you should. Satan has taken advantage of her defects and your errors, to work for the destruction of your family. You have suffered shame of your wife to come into your heart, and your respect has grown less and less for her whom you vowed to love and cherish until death should part you. {2T 299.2}[8]
§19
暴露家庭矛盾的危险[9]
§20
Danger of Confiding Family Troubles[9]
§21
1868年10月25日，你的情形再次呈现在我面前。我蒙指示看到，邪恶的思想和不法的欲望已经使你有了错误的行为且违背上帝的诫命。你给你自己，你妻子，以及上帝的圣工带来了羞辱。你本可在上帝的圣工上发挥为善的影响力。但你在自以为无足轻重的事上采取的错误做法已导致了更大的罪恶。【2T.300.1】[10]
§22
October 25, 1868, your case was again presented before me. I was shown that evil thoughts and unlawful desires have led to improper acts and to a violation of the commandments of God. You have dishonored yourself, your wife, and the cause of God. You could have exerted an influence for good in the cause of God. But the pursuance of a wrong course in matters that you thought were of little consequence has led to greater evils. {2T 300.1}[10]
§23
R弟兄，你的信仰现在有全然破灭的危险。你犯了大罪。但你在试图遮掩自己的罪恶，蒙蔽那些已经怀疑你行错之人的眼目时，你的罪恶已经大了十倍。虽然大家没有都照着主所喜悦的那样心存许多关爱谨慎地行事以便挽回你。但你犯罪后设法装出委屈无辜的样子时，你以为上帝看不到你的错误行为吗？你以为那位用地上的尘土造人、又将生气吹在他鼻孔里的上帝看不透人心的目的和意图吗？你想过要是承认了自己的罪，就会失去自己的荣誉，这宛如要了你的命。你以为你的弟兄们就会不信任你。你看问题的眼光不正确。犯罪是羞耻的，但认罪总是光荣的。【2T.300.2】[11]
§24
Brother R, you are now in danger of making total shipwreck of your faith. You have sinned greatly. But your sin in seeking to cover up, and blind the eyes of those who have suspected you of wrong, has been tenfold greater. All have not acted as prudently and with as much love and care as the Lord would have been pleased to have them, in order to redeem you. But when you tried to put on an air of injured innocence, did you think that God could not see your wrong course? Did you think that He who made man out of the dust of the ground, and breathed into his nostrils the breath of life, could not discern the intents and purposes of the heart? You have thought that if you should confess your sin you would lose your honor--your life, as it were. You thought that your brethren would have no confidence in you. You have not viewed matters in the right light. It is a shame to sin, but always an honor to confess sin. {2T 300.2}[11]
§25
上帝的使者对每一个行为都有忠实的记录，无论你以为自己的做得多么隐密。上帝看透人的意图和人的一切行为。每一个人都要照自己或善或恶的行为受报。人种的是什么，收的也是什么。庄稼一定要成熟，收获是确定而且丰富的。你曾试图蒙蔽你的弟兄们，不让他们知道你的行为。你既知道自己在上帝眼中是有罪的，怎么还能这么做呢？你若重视自己灵魂的得救，就要为永恒作彻底的工作。【2T.300.3】[12]
§26
Angels of God have kept a faithful record of every act, however secret you may have thought you were in its committal. God discerns the purposes of man and all his works. Every man will be rewarded according as his works have been, whether good or evil. That which a man sows will he also reap. There will be no failure in the crop. The harvest is sure and plentiful. You have tried to blind your brethren in regard to your course. How could you do so, when you knew that you were guilty in the sight of God? If you value your souls salvation, make thorough work for eternity. {2T 300.3}[12]
§27
你须通过彻底的认罪在身后留下清白的足迹。你需要彻底悔改——藉着心意更新来改变自己。你必须克服自尊自大的心。你必须学会看别人比自己强。你必须放弃自己造诣很高的想法，你必须获得温柔安静的精神，这在上帝眼中是极其宝贵的。【2T.301.1】[13]
§28
You will have to make a clean track behind you by thorough confession. You need a thorough conversion--a transformation of self by the renewing of your mind. Your self-esteem must be overcome. You must learn to esteem others better than yourself. Your exalted opinion of your own acquirements must be given up, and you must obtain a meek and quiet spirit, which is in the sight of God of great price. {2T 301.1}[13]
§29
你所具有的一种精神已使你偏离了正直的道路，现在你有麻烦了。你心中非常疑惑、恐惧、绝望。你只有一条出路，就是藉着认罪摆脱困境。你惟一的希望就是跌在那磐石上把自己摔碎；如果你不这样作，它就必砸在你身上，把你压碎。你现在可以改正你的错误；你可以弥补继往。借着一种良善和真谦卑的生活，你还可以在你家中与上帝同行，蒙祂悦纳。愿主帮助你，考虑到审判，好像为自己的性命一样工作。亲爱的弟兄，你对你深感关心。你在黑暗中行走已经有些时日了。你并不是一下子陷入这种黑暗状态中，你是逐渐远离光明的。你先是变得自高，然后，你既觉得足可倚靠自己的力量，主便将祂的力量从你撤回了。【2T.301.2】[14]
§30
You have possessed a spirit which has led you from the path of rectitude, and now you are troubled. Doubts, and fears, and despair seize you. There is but one way out, and that is by the way of confession. Your only hope is in falling on the Rock and being broken to pieces; if you do not, it will surely fall upon you and grind you to powder. You can now right your wrongs; you can now redeem the past. By a life of goodness and true humility you can yet walk with acceptance before God in your family. May the Lord help you, in view of the judgment, to work as for your life. Dear brother, I feel deeply interested for you. You have been walking in darkness for some time. You have not arrived at your present state of darkness all at once. You have been leaving the light gradually. You first became exalted, and then, as you felt sufficient in your own strength, the Lord removed His strength from you. {2T 301.2}[14]
§31
你一直对音乐感兴趣。这给了那些轻率不智的女子们机会，她们向你倾诉自己家中的烦恼。这满足了你的骄傲，但也成了你的网罗。它为撒但的暗示开了一扇门。你做了不应当做的事。你没有权利听别人给你讲的家事。这些交谈败坏了你的意念，加剧了你的自尊自大，并且导致了邪恶的思想。你让自己充当忏悔神父的角色，听一些多情妇女的倾诉。她们渴望同情，想要倚靠别人。要是她们具有健全的判断力而且自力更生，人生有目标，喜爱向他人行善，她们原不会落到这种需要求取别人同情的地步。【2T.301.3】[15]
§32
You have been interested in music. This has given incautious, unwise women opportunity, and they have confided their troubles to you. This has gratified your pride, but it has been a snare to you. It has opened a door for the suggestions of Satan. You have not done as you should. You had no right to hear in families that which has been spoken to you. These communications have corrupted your mind, increased your self-esteem, and led to evil thoughts. You have permitted yourself to be a confessor to some sentimental women who desired sympathy and wished to lean upon others. Had they possessed sound judgment and stood self-reliant, having an aim in life, loving to do others good, they would not have been in a condition where they needed to come to anyone for sympathy. {2T 301.3}[15]
§33
你并不了解人心的欺骗，你也不知道撒但的手段。一些多多求取你同情的人有一种病态的幻想，她们害有相思病，多愁善感，常常耸人听闻，小题大做。有些人对自己的婚姻生活不满，觉得不够浪漫。小说类读物已经败坏了她们曾经拥有的优良判断力。她们生活在虚构的世界里。她们的想象力给她们造了一个只在故事小说里才能看到的浪漫丈夫。她们谈论没有回报的爱。她们从不满足也不快乐，因为她们幻想的是一种不真实的生活。何时她们面对现实，回到简单的实际生活，照女人的命分负起自己家中的责任，她们才会得享满足和快乐。【2T.302.1】[16]
§34
You know not the deceptions of the human heart. You know not the devices of Satan. Some who have drawn largely upon your sympathy have a sickly, diseased imagination, are lovesick, sentimental, ever eager to create a sensation and make a great ado. Some are dissatisfied with their married life. There is not enough romance in it. Novel reading has perverted all the good sense they ever had. They live in an imaginary world. Their imagination creates a husband for themselves such as exists only in romances found in novels. They talk of unrequited love. They are never contented or happy, because their imagination pictures to them a life that is unreal. When they face the reality, come down to the simplicity of real life, and take up lifes burdens in their families, as is womans lot, then they will find contentment and happiness. {2T 302.1}[16]
§35
你心中怀藏着错误的思想。这些想法已经结出了果子。“心里所充满的，口里就说出来”（太12:34）。你的言语并不总是贞洁、清纯、造就人的。“污秽的言语，一句不可出口”（弗4:29）。你的口中常有诡诈——从一颗怀藏着败坏思想和邪恶欲望的心发出来的低俗的言语。【2T.302.2】[17]
§36
You have cherished thoughts that were not right. These thoughts have borne fruit. Out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaketh. Your words are not always chaste, pure, and elevated. Let no corrupt communication proceed out of your mouth. Guile is too often found in your mouth-- low expressions that proceed from a heart cherishing corrupt thoughts and evil desires. {2T 302.2}[17]
§37
你的脚步已有一段时间偏离了正直和纯洁的道路。你知道自己的行为不蒙上帝喜悦，因为你正在干犯祂神圣的律法。你知道这些事情是无法隐藏的。上帝不会允许祂的百姓在你的事上受到欺骗。你的大罪在于寻求那些不了解你弯曲行为之人的同情，你因如此行便离间了那些承认真理之人的判断。我们觉得你可怜。我为你心痛。我在你前面除了灭亡和信心破灭什么都看不到。【2T.302.3】[18]
§38
For some time your feet have been turned from the path of rectitude and purity. You know that your course has been displeasing to God, that you are transgressing His holy law; you know that these things cannot be hid. God will not permit His people to be deceived in your case. Your great sin is in enlisting the sympathies of those who do not understand your crooked course, and by thus doing dividing the judgment of the people who profess the truth. We pity you. My heart aches for you. I see nothing before you but perdition, nothing but utter shipwreck of faith. {2T 302.3}[18]
§39
你是要遮掩自己的罪，还是勇敢地把这事说出来呢？上帝说你必不亨通。但那承认并离弃自己罪过的，必蒙怜恤。你难道愿意选择死亡吗？你难道愿意因不肯放弃自己邪恶的骄傲而丧失天国吗？你唯一的希望就在于承认自己是退后了。上帝已让亮光照耀在你的路途上。你还愿意选择自己败坏的路线吗？你难道要因为真理不会支持你不义的行为而将它抛在脑后吗？你要听劝，“要撕裂心肠，不撕裂衣服”（珥2:13）。要为永恒作彻底的工作。上帝还会向你发怜悯。大家还会为你代求。忧伤痛悔的心，上帝必不轻看。你愿意转回吗？你愿意存活吗？你的灵魂值得拯救，它是宝贵的。我们想要帮助你。【2T.303.1】[19]
§40
Will you cover your sins and brave the matter out? God says you shall not prosper. But he that confesseth and forsaketh his sins shall find mercy. Will you choose death? Will you shut the kingdom of heaven against yourself because you will not yield your wicked pride? Your only hope is in confessing your backslidings. God has let light shine upon your pathway. Will you choose your own course of corruption? Will you cast the truth behind you because it will not sustain you in a course of iniquity? Oh, be entreated to rend your heart, and not your garments. Make thorough work for eternity. God will be merciful to you. He will be entreated in your behalf. He will not despise a broken and contrite spirit. Will you turn? Will you live? Your soul is worth saving; it is precious. We wish to help you. {2T 303.1}[19]
§41
我看到你并不快乐。你不得安息。你感到悲伤，可是你不肯踏上那唯一一条会给你带来希望和解脱的道路。承认离弃罪过的，必蒙怜恤。你的情形是可叹的，你在大大损害上帝的圣工。你的影响会毁灭你身边的人。【2T.303.2】[20]
§42
I saw that you are not happy. You are not at rest. You feel distressed, and yet you refuse to take the only course that will bring you relief and hope. He that confesseth and forsaketh his sins shall find mercy. Your condition is deplorable, and you are greatly injuring the cause of God. Your influence will destroy others besides yourself. {2T 303.2}[20]
§43
如果你拒绝来到上帝面前，承认你的背道以便祂医治你，你和你可怜的家庭将来就没有什么指望了。苦恼会随着罪的脚踪而来。上帝的手会与你反对，祂会撇下你去受撒但控制，被他随意掳去。你不知道自己可能走到什么地步。你会像人在海上而没有锚。上帝的真理就是一个锚，你却在放弃那个锚。你永恒的利益正牺牲给肉体的情欲、眼目的情欲和今生的骄傲。你正在挣脱那会救你脱离彻底毁灭的联结。你试图藉着遮掩错误来挽救自己的生命，正是自害己命。你现在若在上帝面前谦卑自己，承认自己的错误，全心全意归向祂，你的家还能成为一个幸福的家庭。你若不愿意这么做，而是执意偏行己路，就断送了你的幸福。【2T.303.3】[21]
§44
If you refuse to come to God and confess your backslidings that He may heal you, there is nothing to be hoped for you or your poor family in the future. Misery will follow upon the steps of sin. Gods hand will be against you, and He will leave you to be controlled by Satan, to be led captive by him at his will. You know not to what lengths you may go. You will be like a man at sea without an anchor. The truth of God is an anchor. You are breaking away from that anchor. Your eternal interests are being sacrificed to the lust of the flesh, the lust of the eyes, and the pride of life. You are on the point of breaking the bonds which would save you from utter destruction. In seeking to save your life by concealing your wrongs, you are losing it. If you now humble yourself before God, confess your wrongs, and return to Him with full purpose of heart, yours can yet be a happy family. If you will not do this, but choose your own way, your happiness is at an end. {2T 303.3}[21]
§45
你要下很大的工夫。你的行为举止一直太过懒散松懈了。你的言语不高尚，不贞洁，不纯净。你在与上帝隔绝，培养低级情欲。你心智的智能和高尚能力已屈服于兽性情欲。你不追求正路已有一段时间了。你没有禁戒一切的恶事。你仍走这条路线是不安全的。【2T.304.1】[22]
§46
You have a great work to do. You have been too slack in your deportment. Your words have not been elevated, chaste, and pure. You have been separating from the divine, and cultivating the baser passions. The intellectual and noble powers of your mind have been brought into subjection to the animal passions. You have not pursued a right course for some time. You have not abstained from every appearance of evil. It is not safe for you to pursue this course any longer. {2T 304.1}[22]
§47
你没有照你所应该地爱你的妻子。她是一位善良的女子。她稍微看到了你的危险。但你对她的劝告置若罔闻。你认为她是出于嫉妒，但这并非她的本性。她爱你，尽管你深深错待了她，但她仍会宽容你，饶恕你，爱你，只要你追求亮光，洁净以往。你必须彻底悔改。你若不这样作，你过去所有遵行真理的努力都不能救你，也不能遮掩你以往的错误。耶稣要求你彻底改革；然后祂就会帮助你、赐福给你、爱你，且用祂自己极宝贵的血涂抹你的罪。你可以补救继往。你可以改正自己的行为，并仍能给上帝的圣工增光添彩。你是能够行善的，只要你持住上帝的能力且奉祂的名工作——为你自己得救也为别人的益处工作。【2T.304.2】[23]
§48
You have not loved your wife as you should. She is a good woman. She has seen, in a small measure, your danger. But you have closed your ears to her cautions. You have thought her jealous, but this is not her nature. She loves you, and will bear with you, and forgive and love you, notwithstanding the deep wrong you have done her, if you will only press to the light and make clean work of the past. You must have a thorough conversion. Unless you do, all your past efforts to obey the truth will not save you nor cover up your past wrongs. Jesus requires of you a thorough reformation; then He will help, and bless, and love you, and blot out your sins with His own most precious blood. You can redeem the past. You can correct your ways and yet be an honor to the cause of God. You can do good when you take hold of the strength of God and in His name work--work for your own salvation and for the good of others. {2T 304.2}[23]
§49
你的家庭还可以是一个幸福的家庭。你的妻子需要你的帮助。她象小鸟依人，想要倚靠你的力量。你能够帮助她并且一路带领她。你决不应责难她。如果她的努力没有达到你的要求，你也决不要责备她。而要用温柔仁爱的话语鼓励她。你能够帮助你的妻子保持她的尊严和自重。决不要在她面前称赞别人的工作或行为以使她感到自己的不足。你在这方面一直是苛刻无情的。你一直对你家中的雇工比对你的妻子更礼貌，且使他们在你家中处于比你妻子更高的地位。【2T.305.1】[24]
§50
Yours can yet be a happy family. Your wife needs your help. She is like a clinging vine; she wants to lean upon your strength. You can help her and lead her along. You should never censure her. Never reprove her if her efforts are not what you think they should be. Rather encourage her by words of tenderness and love. You can help your wife to preserve her dignity and self-respect. Never praise the work or acts of others before her to make her feel her deficiencies. You have been harsh and unfeeling in this respect. You have shown greater courtesy to your hired help than to her and have placed them ahead of her in the house. {2T 305.1}[24]
§51
上帝爱你的妻子。她虽遭受痛苦，但上帝全都看见并记下了，且要你为所造成的伤害担罪。财富和才智都不能使人快乐。惟有道德价值才能办到。真良善才被天庭看为真伟大。一个人的道德特性的状况决定着他的价值。人或许拥有财富和才智，却毫无价值，因为他内心的祭坛上从未燃起过良善的火焰，因为他的良心已经被自私和罪恶烙平、变黑、变脆了。当肉体的情欲控制人时，他就容许属肉体本性的邪情恶欲作王了，对基督徒信仰的真实性的怀疑便受到鼓励，既认为怀疑是一种特殊的美德，便说出了不信的言语。【2T.305.2】[25]
§52
God loves your wife. She has suffered, but He has noticed all, marked all, and will not hold you guiltless for the wounds you have caused. It is neither wealth nor intellect that gives happiness. It is moral worth. True goodness is accounted of Heaven as true greatness. The condition of the moral affections determines the worth of the man. A person may have property and intellect, and yet be valueless, because the glowing fire of goodness has never burned upon the altar of his heart, because his conscience has been seared, blackened, and crisped with selfishness and sin. When the lust of the flesh controls the man, and the evil passions of the carnal nature are permitted to rule, skepticism in regard to the realities of the Christian religion is encouraged, and doubts are expressed as though it were a special virtue to doubt. {2T 305.2}[25]
§53
如果所罗门始终保持了德行，他的人生原可一直卓越直到最后。但他使这种特殊的恩赐屈从于私欲。他在幼年时仰望上帝，寻求上帝的引导并信赖他，而上帝也拣选他，将震烁古今的智慧赐给他。他的能力和智慧在全地得到赞扬。但好色乃是他的罪。他在成年后没有控制这种情欲，它便成了他的网罗。他的妃嫔引诱他去敬拜偶像，当他开始在生活上走下坡路时，上帝便收回了赐给他的智慧。他失去了品格上的坚定，变得幼稚轻浮，在对与错之间摇摆。他既放弃了原则，便置身于邪恶的洪流中，因而使自己与上帝隔绝，远离了他力量的基础和源头。他偏离了原则。智慧对于他曾比俄斐的精金更为宝贵。但可悲的是，私欲竟得了胜。他被女色所欺骗所毁灭。这是多么令人警醒的一个教训啊！这个见证表明，我们是何等地需要上帝的力量以坚持到底啊！【2T.305.3】[26]
§54
The life of Solomon might have been remarkable until its close if virtue had been preserved. But he surrendered this special grace to lustful passion. In his youth he looked to God for guidance and trusted in Him, and God chose for him and gave him wisdom that astonished the world. His power and wisdom were extolled throughout the land. But his love of women was his sin. This passion he did not control in his manhood, and it proved a snare to him. His wives led him into idolatry, and when he began to descend the declivity of life, the wisdom that God had given him was removed; he lost his firmness of character and became more like the giddy youth, wavering between right and wrong. Yielding his principles, he placed himself in the current of evil, and thus separated himself from God, the foundation and source of his strength. He had moved from principle. Wisdom had been more precious to him than the gold of Ophir. But, alas! lustful passions gained the victory. He was deceived and ruined by women. What a lesson for watchfulness! What a testimony to the need of strength from God to the very last! {2T 305.3}[26]
§55
在与内在的败坏和外来的引诱作战时，连大有智慧和能力的所罗门都被打败了。人即便最轻微地偏离最严格的正直都是不安全的。“各样的恶事要禁戒不作”（帖前5:22）。当一个妇女把她家中的烦恼，或她对丈夫的怨尤，向别的男子吐诉时，她便是违背了婚姻的誓约；她也是羞辱了自己的丈夫，拆毁了为保持婚姻关系的神圣性而树立的墙垣；她也就大大地敞开了门户，邀请撒但带着他阴毒的试探进来。这正合乎撒但的心意。假如一位妇女来到一个基督徒弟兄的跟前诉说她的忧患，失意的事和考验，他总要劝她说：要是她必须向人吐诉自己的苦衷，就要从姐妹中选择几位作为心腹之交，这样便能免除一切足以使上帝的圣工遭受羞辱的恶事了。【2T.306.1】[27]
§56
In the battle with inward corruptions and outward temptations, even the wise and powerful Solomon was vanquished. It is not safe to permit the least departure from the strictest integrity. Abstain from all appearance of evil. When a woman relates her family troubles, or complains of her husband, to another man, she violates her marriage vows; she dishonors her husband and breaks down the wall erected to preserve the sanctity of the marriage relation; she throws wide open the door and invites Satan to enter with his insidious temptations. This is just as Satan would have it. If a woman comes to a Christian brother with a tale of her woes, her disappointments and trials, he should ever advise her, if she must confide her troubles to someone, to select sisters for her confidants, and then there will be no appearance of evil whereby the cause of God may suffer reproach. {2T 306.1}[27]
§57
请记住所罗门的教训。列国中没有哪个君王像他那样蒙上帝眷爱。但他却跌倒了。他受诱离开上帝，并因放纵私欲而败坏了。这是现今的时代所盛行的罪恶，其进展是可怕的。自称守安息日的人并不洁净。有些自称相信真理的人内心是腐败的。上帝要试验他们，他们的愚妄和罪恶便要显露出来。只有纯洁谦卑的人才能住在上帝的面前。“谁能登耶和华的山？谁能站在祂的圣所？就是手洁心清，不向虚妄，起誓不怀诡诈的人。”（诗24:3-4）。“耶和华啊，谁能寄居祢的帐幕？谁能住在祢的圣山？就是行为正直，作事公义，心里说实话的人。他不以舌头谗谤人，不恶待朋友，也不随伙毁谤邻里；他眼中藐视匪类，却尊重那敬畏耶和华的人。他发了誓，虽然自己吃亏，也不更改。他不放债取利，不受贿赂以害无辜。行这些事的人必永不动摇”（诗15:1-5）。【2T.306.2】[28]
§58
Remember Solomon. Among many nations there was no king like him, beloved of his God. But he fell. He was led from God and became corrupt through the indulgence of lustful passions. This is the prevailing sin of this age, and its progress is fearful. Professed Sabbathkeepers are not clean. There are those who profess to believe the truth who are corrupt at heart. God will prove them, and their folly and sin shall be made manifest. None but the pure and lowly can dwell in His presence. Who shall ascend into the hill of the Lord? or who shall stand in His holy place? He that hath clean hands, and a pure heart; who hath not lifted up his soul unto vanity, nor sworn deceitfully. Lord, who shall abide in Thy tabernacle? who shall dwell in Thy holy hill? He that walketh uprightly, and worketh righteousness, and speaketh the truth in his heart. He that backbiteth not with his tongue, nor doeth evil to his neighbor, nor taketh up a reproach against his neighbor. In whose eyes a vile person is contemned; but he honoreth them that fear the Lord. He that sweareth to his own hurt, and changeth not. He that putteth not out his money to usury, nor taketh reward against the innocent. He that doeth these things shall never be moved. {2T 306.2}[28]