范妮·博尔顿的故事E

范妮·博尔顿的故事:源文件汇编
§1 ? 范妮·博尔顿的故事:源文件汇编
§2 The Fannie Bolton Story: A Collection of Source Documents
§3 《信函》1887年23a号,(致玛丽·怀特,1887年12月11日)—范妮·博尔顿很快会来到保健院。W.C.怀特认为最好让她来预备文稿,你可以给她一些建议。我希望这事能够做成,因为她需要你平稳可靠的工作来平衡她。{MR926 1.5}[1]
§4 Letter 23a, 1887. (To Mary White, December 11, 1887)—Fannie Bolton will be at the Retreat soon. W.C.W. thought best for her to come and prepare manuscript and you make some suggestions to her. I hope this can be done, for she needs your solid, even work to balance her.?{MR926 1.5}[1]
§5 《信函》1888年第25号第4页,(致赫斯格弟兄和英斯姐妹,1888年2月13日)—范妮·博尔顿是我的宝贝。我们很融洽,大家都本着爱心团结一致地工作。{MR926 1.6}[2]
§6 Letter 25, 1888, p. 4. (To Bro. Haskell and Bro. and Sr. Ings, February 13, 1888)—Fannie Bolton is a treasure to me. We are all harmonious, all working unitedly and in love.?{MR926 1.6}[2]
§7 《信函》1888年第2号第3页,(致沃林先生,1888年4月13日)—我从挪威带来一位音乐家兼翻译,我还从芝加哥带来一位年轻的女士,她和玛丽·克拉夫一样为杂志写稿,他们现在参与我的工作。{MR926 1.7}[3]
§8 Letter 2, 1888, p.3. (To Mr. Walling, April 13, 1888)—I have brought from Norway a musician and translator, and I have also brought from Chicago a young lady who has written for magazines like Mary Clough, and they are now engaged with me in my work.?{MR926 1.7}[3]
§9 《信函》1888年76号第4页,(致洛克伍德弟兄和姐妹,玛丽安·戴维斯,范妮·博尔顿和梅·沃林,1888年5月24日)—我对范妮特别感到关心。我希望她能从神经过敏和失眠中恢复过来。为了康复,她必须花时间休息大脑,使之不会像我们的旧风琴一样完全走调。何时范妮对自己负责,她就会看到可以增进她健康的方法。我很可怜范妮。她有一副好骨架、大骨头,也需要有良好而健康的神经和肌肉。她之所以没有是因为她滥用了她的大脑和神经,当理智应控制并约束她去顺从上帝那掌控人体系统的律法时,她却常使其负担过重并使自己长期处于紧张、兴奋的状态下。我希望范妮能去听保健院正在举办的健康讲座。她的心思和良知应被唤醒去重视这些事情,并运用上帝所赐她的每一分力量来恢复健康,这样她可以使用这些能力为上帝所赐的恩赐,并在所有的工作中操练这些健康的能力。{MR926 1.8}[4]
§10 Letter 76, 1888, p. 4. (To Bro. and Sr. Lockwood, Marian Davis, Fannie Bolton and May Walling, May 24, 1888)—Especially do I feel concerned for Fannie. I want her to recover from this nervousness and wakefulness, and in order to do this she must take time to rest the brain that the nerves may not be completely out of tune like our old organ. When Fannie takes herself in hand, then she will see ways that she can improve her health. I feel so sorry for Fannie. She has a good frame, large bones, and should have good, sound nerves and muscles; and the reason she has not is because she has abused her brain and nerve power by overtaxation, keeping herself upon a strain, keyed up, when reason should take the reins and hold her in obedience to the laws of God which control the human system. I wish Fannie could hear the lectures given now upon health at the Retreat. She needs her mind and conscience stirred up on these things, and needs to use every power God has bestowed upon her to get well, that she may use these powers as God’s entrusted gifts, that she may have healthful powers to exercise in all her work.?{MR926 1.8}[4]
§11 范妮,你每天都需要有户内和户外的运动。如果你累了,你就会使大脑得到休息。至于做怎样的锻炼,要由你自己来决定。你可以自己计划。运用你的机智和脑力去设计你每天当做的运动。我希望你能认清这件事,不要作冲动的人,而要使自己遵守规则和秩序。要对自己负责,让自己有时间。当主看到你正为保持自己的健康而尽力而为时,祂便会做你自己不能做的那部分。{MR926 1.9}[5]
§12 Fannie, you need some physical exercise indoors and out each day. If you get tired it will relieve the brain. What this exercise?shall be I leave you to determine. You can plan it yourself. Use your tact and powers of brain to devise what you will do daily in the line of physical exercise. And I want you to get waked up to this matter. Do not be a creature of impulse, but just bring yourself to regular rules and order. Take yourself in hand, bring yourself to time, and when the Lord sees you are doing what you can for yourself to keep in health, He will do on His part that which you cannot do.?{MR926 1.9}[5]
§13 《信函》1888年59号,第4页,(致巴特勒弟兄和姐妹,1888年8月1日)—我应该为教会出版另一本证言,但我得不到像伊丽莎[伯纳姆]和玛丽安[戴维斯]一样的脑力劳动者。她现在忙卷一[《旧约史》],而伊丽莎在澳大利亚。范妮·博尔顿很适合她正在从事的工作,但她不能处理和安排这些需要注意的事,因为她没有经验。{MR926 2.1}[6]
§14 Letter 59, 1888, p. 4. (To Bro. and Sr. Butler, August 1, 1888)—I ought to have out another testimony for the church, but I cannot obtain brain workers like Eliza [Burnham] and Marian [Davis]. She is now on Volume One [Old Testament History], [and] Eliza [is] in Australia. Fannie Bolton is fitted well for the work she is doing, but she cannot take these matters that require attention and arrange them, for she has not experience.?{MR926 2.1}[6]
§15 《文稿》1889年17号第2页,(日记,1889年1月4日)—去年为我工作的范妮·博尔顿从芝加哥过来了。我们很高兴再次见到她。{MR926 2.2}[7]
§16 Manuscript 17, 1889, p. 2. (Diary entry for January 4, 1889)—Fannie Bolton, who has worked for me the past year, came from Chicago. We were glad to meet her again.?{MR926 2.2}[7]
§17 《信函》1889年14a号第2页,(致爱德森·怀特,约写于1889年4月7日)—我几乎见不到范妮;只在聚会的时候和晚上见一下。除了参加聚会,我不知道她在做什么,我确信这些聚会对她来说很重要。我不会让她和我一起旅行。{MR926 2.3}[8]
§18 Letter 14a, 1889, p. 2. (To Edson White, circa April 7, 1889)—I scarcely see Fannie; only in meeting and a few moments in evening. I do not know what she is doing except to attend the meetings, which I am confident means to her very much. I shall not have her travel with me.?{MR926 2.3}[8]
§19 《信函》1889年66号第2页,(致J.E.怀特,1889年4月9日)—有一件事我已决定,范妮不与我一起旅行。处理讲道并将之写出来对她来说太过劳累了。我一到这里他们就坚持让她为报刊发表文章,然而不久我就不能同意这么做了,她又感到很紧张,以致因参加聚会而变得筋疲力尽了。{MR926 2.4}[9]
§20 Letter 66, 1889, p. 2. (To J. E. White, April 9, 1889)—One thing I am settled upon, that Fannie is not the one to go with me [on trips]. It is too great a tax for her to take the discourses and to write them out. As soon as I came here they fastened upon her to get out articles for the paper, but after a little I could not consent to it and again she feels so intensely that she becomes, by attending the meetings, much exhausted.?{MR926 2.4}[9]
§21 《文稿》1892年34号第2页,(日记,1892年7月9日)—昨夜我12点以后就睡不着了。我的思想比身体的疼痛更令我烦恼。有些考验最好不要细想,因为似乎没有清晰的出路。我设法把重担卸给主,但我不总是把它留在主那里。当我应该把它留在救主那里的时候,我又把它背起来了。{MR926 5.1}[10]
§22 Manuscript 34, 1892, p. 2. (Diary entry for July 9, 1892)—Last night I was not able to sleep after twelve o’clock. It was my thoughts more than pain of body that troubled me. There are some trials that it is not best to dwell upon, because there seems no clear way out of them. I try to cast my burden upon the Lord, but I do not always leave it there. I take it up again when I should leave it with the Saviour.?{MR926 5.1}[10]
§23 我深感忧伤,因为在我的工作中与我联络的人没有都处在受圣灵控制的有利心态。我无法继续雇用现在与我联络的一些人,除非主使他们归正,引导他们看到他们的心必须与祂的旨意和谐一致。当自我没有牺牲时,它就成为一股为恶的统治性势力。{MR926 5.2}[11]
§24 I feel deeply grieved that all connected with me in my work are not in a favorable state of mind to be controlled by the Holy Spirit. I cannot keep in my employ some of those now connected with me unless the Lord converts them, leading them to see that their hearts must be brought into harmony with His will. When self is not sanctified, it becomes a ruling power for evil.?{MR926 5.2}[11]
§25 《信函》1892年74号第7页,(致W.C.怀特,1892年10月10日)—威利啊,我没想到写了这么长的信,但我照着我现在所有的描绘出了这件事。你若将它放在范妮手中,让她使它成形,删掉炉子的事和任何你认为最好删掉的东西,我就能使用这封信,省得我再给赫斯格长老和其他人写长信。请考虑这事,要是范妮能将它整理成形,请再寄回给我。{MR926 8.1}[12]
§26 Letter 74, 1892, p. 7. (To W. C. White, October 10, 1892)—Willie, I did not expect to write so long a letter, but I traced out this matter as I have now. If you will put this into Fannie’s hands, and let her put it into shape, cutting out the stove business and anything you deem best, I will make this letter serve so that it will save me writing to Elder Haskell and some other long letters. Please consider this, and if Fannie arranges it in shape, send it back to me.?{MR926 8.1}[12]
§27 《信函》1892年77号,(致W.C.怀特,1892年10月21日)—我寄了一篇文章给范妮,好准备一份副本寄给普雷斯科特教授,我希望能将它整理成形,寄到有学校的地方。我已就这个问题写了很多,很久,只是又加了一点内容,我知道这是必要的。我有相当多的信有待完成,却不会设法将它们组装出来,因为有几个人写信给我说,要是他们能直接从我手中得到材料,会比整理过的有说服力得多。这听上去像是另一件事,这些内容不是为了公开发表的,我不会将之寄给范妮。我想范妮觉得我的许多用语可以改善,她拿掉生命,指出要改善的用语。{MR926 8.2}[13]
§28 Letter 77, 1892. (To. W. C. White, October 21, 1892)—I send an article to Fannie to prepare a copy to be sent to Professor Prescott and I wish it could be put in shape to send where there are schools. I have had this matter?written, much of it, for a long time and have just put a little addition to it, and I know it is essential. I have quite a number of letters to go, but shall not try to have them fitted up, for several have written me that when they could have the matter direct from my hand, it was far more forcible than after it had been prepared. It sounded like another thing, and as the matter is not designed for publication, I shall not send it to Fannie. I think Fanny feels that many of my expressions can be bettered, and she takes the life and point out of them.?{MR926 8.2}[13]
§29 《信函》1892年16i号第1,2页,(致S.N.赫斯格,1892年11月23日)—你告诉我你寄了一副我要求的信的副本,但我惊讶地看到根本没有信。大约一个小时以来,从范妮和玛丽安那里曾带给我一封信。{MR926 10.1}[14]
§30 Letter 16i, 1892, pp. 1, 2. (To S. N. Haskell, November 23, 1892)—You told me that you sent a letter copied which I requested, but I was surprised to see no letter at all. About one hour since, a letter was brought me from Fannie and Marian.?{MR926 10.1}[14]
§31 好了,我还没有对任何一个人说什么,但我这个冬天有一段相当受考验的时期。二人都有新的归正。她们一直在参加斯塔尔弟兄的查经课,亮光,又宝贵又美好,比金子更宝贵的亮光已经照在她们身上,她们蒙了福气。自从来到澳大利亚,她们在我的工作中很少与我一致,尤其是范妮。我交给她抄写的任何一封督责的信函,她似乎都没有同情,我能理解你的感受,你说直接来自我笔下的信函似乎比她们为期刊预备过后的信函更有灵和生命。我已读过这些信函中的一些,在我看来与你说的一样,丧失了生命活力。我几乎不知道如何表达。{MR926 10.2}[15]
§32 Well, I have said nothing to any one, but I have had rather a trying time this winter. Both are having a new conversion. They have been attending the Bible readings given by Bro. Starr, and light, precious and beautiful, more precious than gold, has shone upon them and they are blessed. There has been, especially with Fannie, but little harmony with me in my work since coming to Australia. Any letters of reproof I gave her to copy, she seemed to have no sympathy with, and I can understand your feelings when you say that letters coming directly from my pen seem to have more spirit and life than after they were prepared for the paper. Some of these letters I have read seemed to me, as you said, to lose the vital energy. I hardly knew how to express it.?{MR926 10.2}[15]
§33 《信函》1892年21b,第3页,(致J.H.凯洛格弟兄和姐妹,1892年12月23日)—范妮·博尔顿健康状况很差。我要做什么呢?我们想让她去塔斯马尼亚休息两个月;要是她在那里不能复原,她就得去圣赫勒那治疗。她若不恢复健康,就得完全放弃工作。我们要找到谁来填补她的空缺呢?你知道什么可以推荐的人吗?在这个国家我找不到一个人。我能让两个人一直工作,但我会对一个能为期刊预备材料的优良的脑力工人感到满意。要是范妮不能复原,我就必须放弃我在期刊上发表文章,或者另找一位助手。我说到这个,不是要给你额外的负担,而是问问你是否知道什么人能从事这项工作,你会让我知道的。我可能不得不叫玛丽·斯图尔德来帮助我,或者将期刊放一放。玛丽能出版第34辑证言,那是非常需要的。{MR926 10.3}[16]
§34 Letter 21b, 1892, p. 3. (To Bro. and Sr. J. H. Kellogg, December 23, 1892)—Fannie Bolton is in very poor health. What shall I do? We think of having her go to Tasmania to rest two months; if she fails to recover there, she must go to St. Helena for treatment. Unless she does regain her health, she shall have to give up work altogether. Who shall we get to fill her place? Do you know of any one you can recommend? There is not a soul in all this country I can find. I could keep two supplied with work, but I shall be satisfied with one good brain worker who can prepare matter for the papers. Unless Fannie recovers, I must give up my articles in the papers or secure another helper. I speak of this, not to place an extra burden upon you, but to ask [that] if you know of any one who can do this work, you will let me know. I may have to call Mary Steward to come to my help, or let the papers rest awhile. Mary could get out Testimony No. 34, which is much needed.?{MR926 10.3}[16]
§35 《信函》1893年130号第4页,(致W.C.怀特,1893年6月7日)—我有一个炉子在坦尼姐妹家。请注意将它取来与我的东西放在一起。我完全同意将玛丽安置于她会拥有最佳优势之处。她若没有阳光充足的房间,范妮也得不到阳光充足的房间,就要看看是否能得到与学生们租住的某个家庭一样的房子,好使她们能拥有向阳的房间。这是我最大的忧虑,二人都应保持健康。{MR926 14.1}[17]
§36 Letter 130, 1893, p. 4. (To W. C. White, June 7, 1893)—I have a stove at Sister Tenney’s. Please see that it is secured and placed with my things. I give my full consent to place Marian where she will have the very best advantages. If she has not a sunny room and Fannie cannot get a sunny room, see if it is not possible to secure the same in some home where the students are hiring, that they can have rooms that have the sun. This is my great anxiety, that both should keep well.?{MR926 14.1}[17]
§37 《信函》1894年136号,第1-3页,(致W.C.怀特,1894年1月8日)—我刚才收到和阅读了来自范妮的一封信,其中有正确的回响,我很欣慰,她正设法前所未有地将自己交给上帝。我希望并祈求这次的考验会使我们得益处并荣耀上帝。……你在考虑过整件事情,深思熟虑并为之祈祷之后,要让我知道对于我接范妮回来的事,你心中的印象怎样。我想要完全照着主希望的去做。如果所发的警告已叫范妮悔改,她看起来也真的归正了,那么在这件事上信任她岂不是最好的吗?要让我知道我该怎么做。我不能要求更加充分的认罪了。我已非常坦率地对待她,我现在确实非常希望以主的方式行事。我需要祂的忠告,在我看来,似乎我们的工作临到了一个危机。我在与范妮坦率地谈过之后,拒绝再见到她了。{MR926 18.1}[18]
§38 Letter 136, 1894, pp. 1-3. (To W. C. White, January 8, 1894)—I have just received and read a letter from Fannie and it has the right ring in it and I am so thankful that she is trying to surrender herself to God as she has never done before. I will hope and pray that this trial may work our good and the glory of God.... After you shall consider the whole matter, and think it all over, and pray about it, let me know what is the impression on your mind in regard to my taking Fannie back. I want to do exactly as the Master would have me to do. If the warnings given have called Fanny to repentance and she appears to be truly converted, then will it be best to trust her with this matter? Let me know what I should do. I could not ask a more full confession. I have dealt very plainly with her and I do now greatly desire to move in the way of the Lord. I want His counsel and it seems to me we have come to a crisis in our work. I have, after talking plainly with Fannie, refused to see her again.?{MR926 18.1}[18]
§39 我自从帐篷大会以以来,睡眠不及平时的量。有好几个早上过了两点钟还睡不着。我被困惑重压,心情非常悲痛。在我看来将来如此无常,如此充满困惑茫然。你在读了所附她的信函之后,就能更好地告诉我要做什么决定了。{MR926 18.2}[19]
§40 I have not had my usual amount of sleep since the camp meeting. Several mornings, could not sleep past two a.m. I have been weighed down with perplexity and with great distress of mind. The future looks so uncertain to me, so full of perplexities. If Fannie is dropped out, who will do the work? After reading the enclosed letter from her, then you can better tell what decisions to make.?{MR926 18.2}[19]
§41 天气多变。我和斯塔尔弟兄夫妇多次驾车出去。我们一起商量了范妮的事,因为范妮寻求过他的忠告,她对被派回巴特尔克里克的前景几乎感到绝望。然而自从这封信来到之后,我有了一线希望,她的改变可能会需要我改变决定。这是我的心愿,想要知道我在这个时候应该采取什么立场。你若有任何忠告,请告诉我。只要你回来的时候写信给我,我就会有事去做了。……{MR926 18.3}[20]
§42 The weather is changeable. I have ridden out quite a number of times with Brother and Sister Starr. We have consulted together over the case of Fannie, for Fannie has sought his counsel and she feels almost in despair at the prospect of being sent back to Battle Creek. But since this letter came, I have had a glimmering hope that the change in her may call for a change of decision in me. This is my desire, to know what position I should take at this time. If you have any counsel, please give it. Oh, if you had only written to me when you would come back, then I could have something to work to....?{MR926 18.3}[20]
§43 我不愿在你的业务完成之前催你回来,除非你认为最好尽一切办法让范妮回美国去。{MR926 19.1}[21]
§44 I will not urge that you come back before you get your business done unless you think it best by all means for Fannie to go back to America.?{MR926 19.1}[21]
§45 《信函》1894年137号第1页,(致W.C.怀特,1894年早期)—我已决定再给范妮一次试验。我认为这必是上帝的旨意,因为我们的主知道她多么难以降卑自己的骄傲,承认自己的错误。我们尽我们所能地帮助她,我相信她还会能够存谦卑的心与上帝同行。……我觉得将要说我今天就要去悉尼与你和奥尔森长老好好谈谈这件事,但这可能不是最佳计划,我认为我们这次也许能调整范妮的事。但是没必要鼓励她开始从事其它方面的工作到任何程度,因为这种业务的多样性恰好适合她,且使她没有资格兼顾著作。她身心疲惫地开始处理著作,只是匆匆略过,没有进行深谋远虑和恳切祈祷。我现在要撇下这件事了。{MR926 19.2}[22]
§46 Letter 137, 1894, p.1. (To W. C. White, Early 1894)—I have concluded to give Fannie another trial. I think this must be the will of God, for our Lord knoweth how hard it is for her to humble her pride and acknowledge her mistakes. We must help her all we can, and I believe she will yet be able to walk humbly with God.... I have felt on the eve of saying I will go to Sydney this very day and talk matters over with you and Elder Olsen, but this may not be the best plan and I think we can adjust the matter of Fannie, perhaps, this time. But it is no use to encourage taking up other lines of work to any extent for this variety of business suits her exactly and disqualifies her to give due consideration to the writings. She comes to them wearied in body and in mind and dashes through them without due forethought and earnest prayer. I will now leave this matter.?{MR926 19.2}[22]
§47 《信函》1894年59号,全信,(致奥尔森弟兄,1894年2月5日)—亲爱的奥尔森弟兄,我在负着一个重担,不能再独自承担了。我希望你深思熟虑好回到这个地方。关于我的著作,一些事必须摆在你和威利面前。在我将这件事摆在你面前之前,我不会再对我的著作做成什么,你一定要花时间阅读这些篇章,即使不能全部阅读,也要读一些。{MR926 19.3}[23]
§48 Letter 59, 1894, entire letter. (To Bro. Olsen, February 5, 1894)—Dear Brother Olsen, I am carrying a heavy burden, and I can bear this no longer alone. I wish you to make calculations to return to this place. Some matters, in reference to my writings, must come before you and Willie. I shall have nothing more done upon them until I lay the matter before you, and you must give time to read some of these chapters, if not all of them.?{MR926 19.3}[23]
§49 斯塔尔弟兄来找我,与我谈了范妮对他说过的事。他说他当时在宣读来自证言的内容,并对在这些末后的日子为我们呈现在他们面前的清晰亮光作出评论,还说到了某一证言中的优美用词。范妮在会后去找他,并且问他是否认为将全部荣誉都归给怀姐妹而不提到工作人员——玛丽安和她自己——是正确的。她说那些文章的理念和准备工作几乎完全改变了怀姐妹的著作,怀姐妹的著作是那种样子,以致她们不得不做出全盘改动,而她却得到了全部荣誉,那些参与装备这些文章的人却没有得到认可。斯塔尔长老说他干脆地对付了她,说:“你对我说这些事是什么意思?”他说那就像一把匕首扎在他的心上。她向玛丽安讲了这些事,玛丽安已被诱导有了许多同样的看法,但还没有到范妮的程度。{MR926 19.4}[24]
§50 Brother Starr came to me and talked with me in reference to things Fannie had said to him. He said he was reading from the testimonies, and making remarks in regard to the clear light presented before them for us in these last day, and spoke of the beautiful language used in a certain testimony. Fannie took him after meeting and asked him if he thought it was right to give all the credit to Sister White, and make no mention of the workers, Marian and herself. She said the ideas and preparations of the articles were almost entirely changed from the writings of Sister White, that her writings came in such a shape that they had to be made all over and that she got all the credit, and those who were engaged in fitting up these articles received no recognition. Elder Starr said he met her squarely, and said, “What do you mean by saying these things to me?” He said it went like a dagger to his heart. She has talked these things to Marian and Marian has been led into much of the same views, but not to the extent of Fannie.?{MR926 19.4}[24]
§51 好了,我觉得像一只受到伤害打击的鹿,快要死了。我以前曾就此受到过警告,两次在普雷斯顿,三次在新西兰。曾赐给我一次与玛丽·克拉夫的情况的类似的警告,然而这并没有使我充分觉悟到危险和真实的情形。我不会花时间解释这些警告。我离开新西兰之前不久,还在帐篷大会的时候,这事就显在我面前了。我们相当多的一群人聚集在一间屋子时,范妮在说一些事,论到出自她手中的大量工作。她说:“我不能以这种方式工作。我在将我的头脑和生命投入这工作,可是做成这工作的人却消沉不见,而怀姐妹得到了这工作的荣誉。”我说了一些很尖锐的东西。我说:“你的野心要为首,要作大事,正在对你造成损害;你若不在品格上彻底改变,就必丧失你的灵魂,在听到你并不要我听到的话之后,我就了解了你的精神。你不是在跟从基督,而是在跟从另一个领袖,我不敢再将我的著作放在你手中了。”{MR926 19.5}[25]
§52 Well, I felt like a wounded stricken deer, ready to die. I had been warned of this before, twice in Preston and three times in New Zealand. A similar warning was given me as in the case of Mary Clough, but this did not fully arouse me to the danger, and to the real situation. I will not take time to explain these warnings. Not long before I left New Zealand, while in camp meeting, it was represented to me. We were gathered in a room of quite a company, and Fannie was saying some things in regard to the great amount of work coming from her hands. She said, “I cannot work in this way. I am putting my mind and life into this work, and yet the ones who make it what it is, are sunk out of sight and Sister White gets the credit for the work.” I said some very pointed things. I said, “Your ambition to be first and do some great thing is doing you harm; you will certainly lose your soul if you are not thoroughly transformed in character, and after hearing?your words which you did not mean I should hear, I understand your spirit. It is not Christ you are following, but another leader, and I dare no longer place my writings in your hands.”?{MR926 19.5}[25]
§53 我又听到她与玛丽安之间的恳谈,谈话的性质使我的心大感伤痛。一个声音对我说:“要当心,不要信赖范妮去预备文章或制作书籍。她删掉应该发表的文字,换成她自己的想法和文字,因为她已这么做过,她成了受欺骗、被迷惑的,而且正在欺骗和迷惑他人。她是你的仇敌。作出的添加和删减没有表现你的简朴。她并不忠于自己的职责,可是却自以为在做一项非常重要的工作。”{MR926 20.1}[26]
§54 Again I was listening to earnest talk between herself and Marian, and it was of that character that gave me great pain of heart. A voice spoke to me, “Beware and not place your dependence upon Fannie to prepare articles or to make books. She cuts out words that should appear, and places her own ideas and words in their stead, and because she has done this she has become deceived, deluded, and is deceiving and deluding others. She is your Adversary. Additions and subtractions are made that do not represent your simplicity. She is not true to her duty, yet flatters herself that she is doing a very important work.”?{MR926 20.1}[26]
§55 我现在从上次止笔的地方继续写。我甚至不能写作《基督生平》,直到我了解我的著作是不是带有范妮的想法和语言,或带有玛丽安的想法和改进以致可以被称作玛丽安和范妮的作品。假使在我们的传道人心中留下了这种印象,证言对他们还有什么价值或说服力呢?我已叫停,而且我就站在这里,直到一些事做出决定。我请求丹尼尔斯长老、卢梭长老和威利C.怀特来帮助我,你一调整好你的业务,我们就一起商量一下吧,看看以什么方式调整这些事。我已坦率而仁慈地告诉范妮,就她最近三到四周的改革而言,我对她已没有信心了。她对称赞与野心的热爱与我在异象中看到的撒但在天庭将不满带进天使们中间的作为很相似,她会重复她曾采取的做的法,我不能信赖和倚靠她了。我求你尽快来帮助我,但我不愿奥尔森长老在极其彻底仔细地调查这些事之前就回美国去。我不认为将来我还能将什么副本放在范妮手中。我愿意立刻来到你面前,但却认为那不会有智慧。{MR926 20.2}[27]
§56 I am now brought where I lay down my pen. I cannot write even on the Life of Christ, until I understand whether my writings are to come forth with Fannie’s ideas and language, or with Marian’s ideas and fixing up and the productions are claimed to be Marian’s and Fannie’s. Let this impression be made on the minds of our ministers, and of what value or force will the testimonies be to them. I have called a halt and here I stand until some things are decided. I request Elder Daniells, Elder Rousseau and Willie C. White come to help me just as soon as you can adjust your business and let us counsel together, and see some way to adjust these matters. I have plainly but kindly told Fannie, I have no confidence in her as far as her reformation within the last three or four weeks is concerned. Her ardent love for praise and ambition was very similar to that presented to me in regard to the workings of Satan in the heavenly courts to bring disaffection among the angels, and she would repeat the same course she had pursued, and I could not trust her and depend on her. I beg you will come to my help just as soon as possible, but I am not willing Elder Olsen should return to America before these matters have a most thorough, careful investigation. I do not think I can in the future have any copy placed in the hands of Fannie. I would come at once to you but do not think that that would be wisdom.?{MR926 20.2}[27]
§57 我们第一次一起在我们的餐厅用餐。我上周日在布莱顿讲了道。有一百人在场。那是极其压抑的一天。我身体不太好。我已摆在你面前的原因是明显的。范妮似乎破碎而谦卑了,但一股逆流会在任何时间从另一个方向到来。我在就着灯光写信。我凌晨两点半就开始写了。我寄给你这个感到哀伤,但有所作为的时候已经充分来到。{MR926 20.3}[28]
§58 We have for the first time taken our meal together in our dining room. I spoke in Brighton last Sunday. 100 were present. It was a most oppressive day. I have not been well. The reasons are evident in that which I have placed before you. Fannie seems broken and humbled, but a counter current will set in another direction any time. I am writing by lamp light. I commenced about 2:30 A.M. I feel distressed to send this to you, but the time has fully come for something to be done.?{MR926 20.3}[28]
§59 《信函》1894年7号,全信,(致范妮·博尔顿,1894年2月6日)—范妮姐妹,我今天早上拒绝见你,因为我的健康状况没有好到足以再承受会影响我心脏的任何事,无论好坏。我昨晚睡得很少。我必须摆脱你的情况的任何责任。过去几年你处理最神圣事物的经验并没有增加你对圣事的爱心或信任。在你心中常将它们放在与俗事一样的水平;但在你看来相当低劣、你视为并不重要的理念、言词和表达,却可能正是应该本着它们的简朴照原样发表的东西。你按照你自以为出众的判断替换了这些,其实原来的措辞远比你提供的更好。所交给你的作品,你待之如无足轻重的东西,常常以一种会使别人低估的方式谈到它们。你这么做已经不忠于我了。{MR926 20.4}[29]
§60 Letter 7, 1894, entire letter. (To Fannie Bolton, February 6, 1894)—Sister Fannie, I declined seeing you this morning, for I am not well enough to bear anything more, either good or bad, that will have a tendency to affect my heart. I slept very little last night. I must be relieved from all responsibility in your case. The experience of the years past wherein you have handled the most sacred things, has not increased your love for or confidence in them. In your mind they are too often placed on a level with common things; but the ideas, words, and expressions, which seem to you rather inferior, and which you regard as non-essential, may be the very things that should appear as they are, in their simplicity. You replace these according to that which you suppose is your superior judgment, when the?words were better, far better, than the ones supplied by you. The writings given you, you have handled as an indifferent matter, and have often spoken of them in a manner to depreciate them in the estimation of others. In this you have been disloyal to me.?{MR926 20.4}[29]
§61 同样地,要是把处理《旧约》和《新约》经文的任务交给你,你就会觉得要作很大的改进,要添加和删减很多东西,还要改变表达方式。你就会加入一些文字和想法,使它看起来符合你的标准。于是我们就应该有范妮·博尔顿的生活和表达方式,你会认为这是绝妙的改进,但上帝并不赞成。你对神圣事物的辨识力并不清晰,而是混乱的。你赞成那有缺陷的东西,那带有神圣印记的东西你倒要塑造,而不是赏识。在改动上,你不会改善,而会用你以为闪闪发光的想法进行削弱和稀释。{MR926 21.1}[30]
§62 In the same manner, if you had the task given you of handling Old and New Testament writings, you would see large improvements to be made, great additions and subtractions and changes of expression; you would put in words and ideas to suit your standard of how it should appear. We should then have Fannie Bolton’s life and expressions, which would be considered by you a wonderful improvement; but disapproved of God. Your discernment of sacred things is not clear, but confused. You approve that which is defective, the things bearing the divine stamp you would mold over, and not appreciate. In changing, you would not improve, but would weaken and dilute with your supposed sparkling ideas.?{MR926 21.1}[30]
§63 现在,我的姐妹,我不希望你再参与我的工作。我的意思是现在从你自身的利益考虑,你绝不会再有一次机会受试探去像你以往那样行事了。根据主所赐给我的亮光,你不是在赏识你所大量拥有的机会,接受指示用坚固的材料建造你的品格。你一直在从事的工作被视为一种苦差事,你难以用正确的精神把握它,也难以将你的祷告交织在工作中,觉得保持一种与上帝的灵完全和谐一致的精神是一件重要的事。由于这种缺乏,你不是可靠又能干的工人。你的思想易变;先是兴高采烈,然后沮丧郁闷。这种频繁的改变造成的印象是惊人的。自我控制并没有带进你的生活中。你选择一种变化的生活,挤满不同的兴趣和职业,因此你不可能像你以为你已经做了的那样将你的生命投入到这项工作中;你在以为自己这么做了方面受了最惊人的欺骗。上帝看见加给各部门工作的整个模子。自我没有藏在上帝里面,反而与每件事都混杂在一起。你所从事的一切都有那么强烈的盘子味道以致不蒙上帝悦纳。{MR926 21.2}[31]
§64 Now, my sister, I do not want you to be any longer connected with me in my work. I mean now, for your good, that you should never have another opportunity of being tempted to do as you have done in the past. From the light given me of the Lord, you are not appreciating the opportunities which you have had abundantly, to be instructed and to bring the solid timbers into your character building. The work in which you have been engaged has been regarded as a sort of drudgery, and it is hard for you to take hold of it with the right spirit, and to weave your prayers into your work, feeling that it is a matter of importance to preserve a spirit wholly in harmony with the Spirit of God. Because of this lack you are not a safe and a capable worker. Your mind is subject to changes; first it is elated, then depressed. The impression made by this frequent change is startling. Self-control is not brought into your life. You choose a life of change, crowded with different interests and occupations, therefore you cannot possibly put your life, as you suppose you have done, into this work; you are most wonderfully deceived in thinking you do this. God sees the whole mold given to the work in every department. Self is not hid in God, and self is mingled with everything. All you engage in tastes so strongly of the dish that it is not acceptable to God.?{MR926 21.2}[31]
§65 我曾希望在你经手的著作中不断带到你面前的教训会有一种显著的影响,依照上帝的形像、基督的柔和谦卑塑造和形成你的生活和品格。但你非但没有被圣灵塑造,反而设法支使圣灵到你的模子,那明显是一个有缺陷的模式。因此我说,你工作中一切良善的东西都有一只死苍蝇在其中,就像一瓶极好的膏油,其香气因死苍蝇而变臭了。你带到放在你手中预备的文章的精神阻止上帝的灵行事,以致你的心没受到应有的感动。{MR926 21.3}[32]
§66 I had hoped that the lessons constantly brought before you in the writings you were handling would have a marked influence to mold and fashion your life and character after the divine image, the meekness and lowliness of Christ. But instead of being molded by the Holy Spirit, you seek to work the Holy Spirit to your mold, which is decidedly a defective pattern. Therefore I say, all that is good in your labor has a dead fly in it, like a bottle of excellent ointment, the fragrance of which is spoiled because of the dead fly. The spirit which you bring to the preparation of the articles placed in your hands prevents the Spirit of God from working to impress your mind as it should.?{MR926 21.3}[32]
§67 要是玛丽安没有发挥很有力的影响让你在我们离开普雷斯顿后留在我的服务中,我本应该让另一个人取代你。但教育一个新手从事工作所有的困难表现阻止了我做我现在完全确信我在来这个国家之前早在巴特尔克里克的时候就应该做成的事。你工作得够努力了;我没有抱怨你做得不够,而是反对你工作的精神。在一个大办公室,你会有各种各样事情要处理的地方,你的能力会更有用武之地。你能以你自己的风格匆忙完成事情,像一种机械作业,塑造和形成它以迎合你自己。每一次我能看出你的一句话,就用笔把它划掉。{MR926 21.4}[33]
§68 If Marian had not exerted her influence very strongly to have you retained in my service after we left Preston, I should have had another to take your place. But the representation of the difficulty in educating a novice in the work has prevented me from doing that which I am now thoroughly convinced I should have done as far back as when in Battle Creek before coming to this country. You have worked hard enough; I make no complaint of your not doing enough, but that to which I object is the spirit with which you come to the work. In a large office, where you would have a variety of matters to handle, your ability would have a?more appropriate field. You could dash off the matter in your own style, as a mechanical work, molding and fashioning it to suit yourself. Every time I can distinguish a word of yours, my pen crosses it out.?{MR926 21.4}[33]
§69 我常常告诉你,你的话语和观念不可取代上帝赐给我的话语和观念,我再三告诉你也是完全无用的。你已选择自己的道路,并将自我混杂在你的工作中,变得越来越少察觉到对你自己的自我和对工作的危险。你已开始认为你就是那个应该从出自你手中的材料的价值得到荣誉的人。我已有关于这种情况的警告,但看不出应该怎样直达要点地说:“走吧,范妮,”因为那样你就会辩解:“我要去哪里呢?”我便再试你一次。{MR926 22.1}[34]
§70 I have so often told you that your words and ideas must not take the place of the words and ideas given me of God, that the repetition of that is utterly useless. You have chosen your own way, and mingled self with your work, and have become less and less sensible of the danger to your own self and to the work. You have come to think that you were the one to whom credit should be given for the value of the matter that comes from your hands. I have had warnings concerning this, but could not see how I could come to the very point to say, “Go, Fannie,” for then you plead, “Where shall I go?” and [I] try you again.?{MR926 22.1}[34]
§71 有一件事我知道,就是你高估了你的能力和造诣,远过于你自己或别人愿意真实意识到的,因为你的工作在会使它完全的要素方面是有缺陷的。我们是在从事一项带有永恒结果的重大工作。我们有灯又有油在器皿里是每一个灵魂每天的大需要,忽视这个就不会安全。{MR926 22.2}[35]
§72 One thing I know, that you have placed a much higher estimate upon your capabilities and attainments than would be truly realized by yourself or others, for your work is deficient in the very essentials that would make it complete. We are engaged in a work that is weighty with eternal results. To have oil in our vessels with our lamps is the great daily necessity for every soul, and this cannot safely be neglected.?{MR926 22.2}[35]
§73 真理、永恒、考验不可只在口头上,而且要实行。忿怒的碗将要倒在世界居民的身上,他们不愿被吸引归向基督,不愿被塑造成祂的样式。自我高举如此有力地充满整个品格,以致上帝不会使用他们,祂的咒诅将要临到所有这样的人,他们一直没有仰望基督,也就没有变成祂的形像。上帝“爱世人,甚至将祂的独生子赐给他们,叫一切信祂的,不至灭亡,反得永生”(约3:16)。凡因顺从上帝的全部诫命而蒙拣选的人都会成为祂国度的忠心国民。{MR926 22.3}[36]
§74 Truth, eternal, testing, must be not only professed, but acted. The vials of wrath are to be poured upon the inhabitants of the world who would not be drawn to Christ, and would not be molded into His likeness. Self exaltation was so strongly impregnating the whole character that God would not use them, and His curse is to come upon all such, who have not been beholding Christ, being changed into His image. God has “loved the world, that He gave His only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him, should not perish, but have everlasting life.” All are chosen who through obedience to all the commandments of God will become loyal subjects of His kingdom.?{MR926 22.3}[36]
§75 我们在忙些什么?我们是持守亮光的人,那光必须照亮各国。在神圣祭坛点着的蜡烛必须照亮世界,否则人们就会在罪中灭亡。要是那些对真理有聪明认识的人愿意将自己交给上帝,要是祂的圣律法管制你的生活,要是它的原则在你的品格上得到发展,就不会有那么多错误的行动,那么多自私的表面工夫;而会每一个人都感染救人信息之作者的精神,这信息将要试验各国。如果上帝的律法被带进品格中,每一个人就会感到工作的负担和严肃性,要将怜悯的信息传给所有我们能接近的人,好准备好一班人在耶和华的日子站立得住。现在就是上帝的预备日。{MR926 22.4}[37]
§76 What are we about? We are keepers of a light that must illumine all nations. It is the taper kindled at the divine altar that must illuminate the world, else men would perish in their sins. O, if those who have an intelligent knowledge of the truth would submit themselves to God, if His holy law regulated your life, if its principles were developed in your character, there would not be so many false moves, so much selfish surface work; but every one would catch the spirit of the Author of the saving message, the message that is to test all nations. If the law of God were brought into character, every soul would feel the burden and solemnity of the work of sending the message of mercy to all to whom we can gain access to make ready a people to stand in the day of the Lord. Now is the day of God’s preparation.?{MR926 22.4}[37]
§77 我在另一点上有话要说。我们来自美国的姐妹需要在服装的榜样上向上帝交账。在这一点上,上帝并不认可她们为祂的布道士。我们的身、心、灵都需要悔改。我们难道要用自己的榜样导致骄傲、自私的放纵,并在衣着上自私地浪费,来证明我们不遵行上帝的道吗?我所看到的原则不是上帝希望她们有的。我没有奉命详细说明,但警告你们要注意。{MR926 22.5}[38]
§78 I have a word to say upon another point. Our sisters who have come from America have an account to render before God of their example in dress; in this matter they have not been approved of God as His missionaries. We need to be converted, soul, body, and spirit. Shall we by our example lead to pride, to selfish indulgence and selfish expenditure of means in dress that testifies that we are not the doers of the word? The principles were presented before me, which are not as God would have them. I am not called upon to specify, but to warn you to take heed.?{MR926 22.5}[38]
§79 范妮,你自己或其他人并没有看明你工作的精神。他们无法领会这些事的内在本质,但在某些场合中这种精神自己表显出来了。尽管你充满激情与活力,活泼进取,但你的工作中有太多片面、冲动及病态发展的活动,其结果与工作的性质一样。上帝所拣选的器皿会在圣灵的指引下做工。你喜欢自鸣得意。你多半都是在这样的影响下工作,以为你正在从事一项伟大的事业。但是把麦子从糠秕中分别出来时只会剩下少许上等的谷物。然而许多人都以外貌来评判,而不是依据精神和实际的效果。{MR926 22.6}[39]
§80 The spirit that characterizes your work, Fannie, is not discerned by many, yourself or others. They cannot see the true inwardness of these matters, but it manifests itself on certain occasions. Although you are full of activity and zeal and stir and push, there?is so much of one-sided, impulsive, ill-developed movements, that the results are of the same order as the working. God’s chosen vessels will work under the guidance of the Holy Spirit. You have worked largely under the sustaining influence of the self-satisfaction you have cherished, feeling that you were doing a large work. But winnow the wheat from the chaff and there will be very few kernels of pure grain. But the many judge from outward appearance, not from the spirit and real results.?{MR926 22.6}[39]
§81 我们生活的时代与洪水以前相似。现今所有从事救灵工作的人,都应在服装和举止上稳重,并带有主耶稣的印记。他们必须等待,警醒并为圣灵的沛降而祈祷。我们必须吸收基督教的理念,在谈吐和服装上表现真理。人必须警惕在举止和服装上给人的印象。圣经是我们的向导;存着顺从的心去研究其中的教训,你就不会犯错误。{MR926 23.1}[40]
§82 We are living in an age represented as being like that before the flood. All who now plead for souls should in their dress and deportment carry the modesty and marks of the Lord Jesus. They must wait, watch, and pray for the Holy Spirit to be abundantly bestowed. We must take in the idea of Christianity; in conversation and in dress we must represent the truth. A decided guard must be placed upon the human agents in regard to the impressions they are making upon others in deportment and in dress. The Bible is our guide; study its teachings with a purpose to obey, and you need make no mistakes.?{MR926 23.1}[40]
§83 我们的服装应与我们圣洁信仰的特征严格保持一致。“又愿女人廉耻,自守,以正派衣裳为妆饰,不以编发,黄金,珍珠,和贵价的衣裳为妆饰。只要有善行。这才与自称是敬神的女人相宜。”“你们不要以外面的辫头发,戴金饰,穿美衣,为妆饰,只要以里面存着长久温柔安静的心为妆饰。这在上帝面前是极宝贵的。因为古时仰赖上帝的圣洁妇人,正是以此为妆饰,顺服自己的丈夫”(提前2:9,10;彼前3:3-5)。与品格中内在的装饰一样,我们需要把更多圣经的准则融入我们的服装里。{MR926 23.2}[41]
§84 Our dress should be in strict accordance with the character of our holy faith. [1 Timothy 2:9-10;?1 Peter 3:3-5?quoted.] There is need of putting more of the Bible precept into the dress, as well as the inward adorning into the character.?{MR926 23.2}[41]
§85 范妮,你无论去哪里,身处何处,都需要考虑服装的颜色,质料,以及你的着装风格应当适合你并且符合你的年龄和你所主张的信仰。你记得我对奥尔森长老说,在普雷斯顿的时候,你没有合适的衣服,觉得太穷而供不起你所应当配备的服装。你所说的话表明你没有明白我的意思。我现在要你明白。你需要舒适的内衣,是为了健康你所应必备的。我当然在各方面都不赞成你的着装风格。当你穿着浅色的大提花裙子站在讲台上,面对帐篷下的一大群人,我感到颇为难过和羞耻,因为不适合这种场合。你在服装方面的判断力可以大大提高。我希望你不要咨询你的裁缝,而应求教于那些头脑理智,不会奉承你,口中没有任何诡诈的人。他们会告诉你能给信徒和非信徒都留下好印象的合适服装。我们自称身在光中,在儿童的聚会中担任教导别人之重要职位的人,着装应当简朴,但仍须讲求整洁,富有品味。我们决不要给任何人借口在这腐败的世代中去效法世俗变化的时尚。那些按着圣经的吩咐着装的人能够用适当的话语帮助别人达到适当的标准。不要来问我你当如何着装。我们的姐妹如果心中存有圣灵活泼的原则,就不会让人有丁点儿机会拿传道人的妻子或者从事查经工作之人的例子,推翻上帝的劝勉。你服装的布料要优质耐用,颜色端庄;应当朴素,避免盛装艳服。你一定要提高你的穿衣品位。{MR926 23.3}[42]
§86 Fannie, wherever you go, wherever you may be, you need to study that the colors and material and style of your dress should be adapted to, and correspond with, your age and to the faith you profess. You remember I made the remark to Elder Olsen that when at Preston you were destitute of suitable clothing and felt too poor to supply yourself with what you should have. The remarks you made showed that you did not understand me. I want to be understood now. You need comfortable underclothing, which you must have in order to have health. But I certainly do not, in all respects, approve of your style of dress. I felt rather sad and ashamed when you stood upon the platform before the large crowd under the tent, with that light, large-figured dress. It was not appropriate for the occasion. Your judgment in the matter of dress may be much improved, and I hope you will not consult your dress-maker but those who are of sensible minds and who will not flatter you or have any guile in their mouths as to suitable clothing that will make a proper impression upon the minds of both believers and unbelievers. We who claim to be in the light, and who take prominent positions to instruct others in children’s meetings, need to be severely plain, yet tidy and tasteful, in dress; we should not give a semblance of excuse to any for patterning after the worldly, changing fashions of this corrupt age. Those who dress after the order given in the Bible can, with appropriate words, help others to reach a proper standard. Do not come to me to ask how you shall dress. If our sisters have the Spirit of God abiding as a living principle in the heart, they will not in a single instance give occasion for any to turn aside the counsels of God by quoting the ministers’ wives or those engaged in giving Bible-readings. Ever have your dress of good, durable material, and modest colors; let it be made plainly, without adornment. You certainly need to improve in your style of dress.?{MR926 23.3}[42]
§87 范妮,你已提出疑问:当那些整理怀著内容的人没有得到认可的时候,怀夫人因她出版的书而得到荣誉是对的吗?你的想法被放进了书籍和期刊里,然而沉没不见了。{MR926 23.4}[43]
§88 Fannie, you have proposed the query, Was it right for credit to be given to Sister White for the books she published, when those who worked up the matter were not recognized? Your ideas were put into the books and papers, and yet sunk out of sight.?{MR926 23.4}[43]
§89 主藉着圣经中所记亚伦和米利暗的事迹向我指出了你的立场。亚伦和米利暗不喜欢摩西的婚姻。他们怀有这些情绪,完全出于自我。他们以为摩西自视比他们高;他们始终要站在次要的位置。这种感觉状态正是撒但希望引起的。这和当初他在天上开始推进的工作如出一辙。他设计他的试探,使那些试探适合环境;因为在他的工作方法中,他能将自己转变成光明的天使。撒但虽然不能侵入人的大脑、思维机能和心灵的眼睛,但他却能使肉眼所看见的事物显得符合他的精心策划。{MR926 23.5}[44]
§90 Your position has been represented to me by the history of?Aaron and Miriam as given in the Scriptures. Aaron and Miriam became displeased with Moses because of his marriage. They cherished these feelings, which had their origin wholly in self. They thought Moses regarded himself as superior to them, and they must ever stand as second. This state of feeling was just what Satan desired to bring about. It was in his lines to carry forward the work he began in heaven. He framed his temptations, adapting them to the circumstances; for in his methods of working he can transform himself into an angel of light. Satan could not touch the head, the reasoning faculties, the eyes of the mind; but he could make things which the outward eye looked upon appear in accordance with his subtle working.?{MR926 23.5}[44]
§91 会对人的心灵产生同样的影响,好像眼睛瞎了一样。撒但潜入,自称非常关心以色列人的兴旺。亚伦和米利暗有了一样的想法。他们交换意见以后说:“难道耶和华单与摩西说话,不也与我们说话吗?”请注意下面的话:“这话耶和华听见了”(民12:2)。{MR926 24.1}[45]
§92 The very same effect would be produced upon the mind as if the eyes were blinded. Satan insinuates himself, professing to have a very great interest in the prosperity of the children of Israel. Aaron and Miriam became one in mind. They communicated with one another, and they said, “Hath the Lord indeed spoken only by Moses? Hath he not spoken also by us?” Mark that which follows: “And the Lord heard it.”?{MR926 24.1}[45]
§93 耶和华听见人们讲的许多事,祂洞悉人在隐密之处所讲的话和所怀有的对品格有控制力的原则汇成邪恶的漩涡,演变成剧烈的行动。人如果能时常想到自己所讲的每一句话,甚至在密室里所说的话,都有一位见证者在场听见,他们就会少有私下交流,少用他们得意洋洋的想法和邪恶的建议影响别人的意念,这些东西说出了那大骗子的试探。他掩饰的能力、假装的技巧那么大,以致惟有耶和华才能看透他败坏人心的作为。但愿每一个人在与别人私下会谈为要获得同情时都记住这句话:“这话耶和华听见了”(民12:2)。{MR926 24.2}[46]
§94 The Lord hears many things which human beings say, and He understands the current of evil started into intense activity by words spoken in secret, and by the principles cherished, which have a controlling power upon the character. If persons could always consider that there is a Witness present to hear every word they speak, even in the secret chamber, there would be fewer private communications from human lips to leaven the minds of others by their exalted ideas and evil suggestions, which are voicing the temptations of the great deceiver. So great is his power of dissimulation, his skill in acting, that the Lord alone could fathom his work in corrupting human minds. Let every human being in their secret conferences with others to obtain sympathy remember these words: “And the Lord heard it.”?{MR926 24.2}[46]
§95 有一位能为摩西辩护。请听祂的见证的话一直流传到我们的世代,证明上帝的意念与世人的想法是大相径庭的:“摩西为人极其谦和,胜过世上的众人。耶和华忽然对摩西、亚伦、米利暗说:‘你们三个人都出来,到会幕这里。’他们三个人就出来了。耶和华在云柱中降临,站在会幕门口,召亚伦和米利暗,二人就出来了。耶和华说:‘你们且听我的话:你们中间若有先知,我耶和华必在异象中向他显现,在梦中与他说话。我的仆人摩西不是这样;他是在我全家尽忠的。我要与他面对面说话,乃是明说,不用谜语,并且他必见我的形像。你们毁谤我的仆人摩西,为何不惧怕呢?’耶和华就向他们二人发怒而去。云彩从会幕上挪开了,不料,米利暗长了大麻疯,有雪那样白”(民12:3-10)。主已拣选摩西去做某项工作,曾吩咐他带着信息去见法老,但摩西请求免了。“主啊,我素日不是能言的人,就是从祢对仆人说话以后,也是这样。我本是拙口笨舌的。耶和华对他说:谁造人的口呢?谁使人口哑、耳聋、目明、眼瞎呢?岂不是我耶和华吗?现在去吧,我必赐你口才,指教你所当说的话。摩西说:主啊,祢愿意打发谁,就打发谁去吧”(出4:10-13)!不信他自己的能力导致不信任上帝。摩西已经四十年不在埃及了。这么长时期的卑微牧人生活的训练对于预备他从事伟大工作来说是必要的。他生来有一种冲动鲁莽的精神,充满野心和热心要实行他的想法和计划,依照他自己的想象行事,为要实现以色列人的得救。他必须得到修剪,像葡萄树蔓延拖尾的枝子一样。在孤寂的山间,他度过了四十年的时光,在基督的门下为上帝的显现受训练。{MR926 24.3}[47]
§96 There was One who could vindicate Moses. Hear His testimony; the words come sounding down along the lines to our time, evidencing that the mind of God is not in agreement with the thoughts of men: [Numbers 12:3-10quoted.] These things are written “for our admonition, upon whom the ends of the world are come.” The Lord had chosen Moses to do a certain work, and had bidden him go with the message to Pharaoh, but Moses begged to be excused. [Exodus 4:10-13.] Unbelief in his own ability led to distrust of God. Moses had been absent from Egypt for forty years. For this long period the discipline of the humble shepherd’s life was necessary to prepare him for his great work. He was naturally of an impetuous spirit, full of ambition and zeal to carry out his ideas and plans, working after his own imaginings to bring about the deliverance of Israel. He must be pruned and cut back, like the branches of the spreading, trailing vine. In the solitude of the mountains he passed his time for forty years, being disciplined in the school of Christ for the manifestation of God.?{MR926 24.3}[47]
§97 摩西在埃及的早期经验中,一直受到称赞美和宠爱,他曾吸引人们归向他自己。他被颂扬为军队的总司令,他也喜悦因奉承而得意洋洋。然而主看到表面之下;祂看到摩西必须有一种完全不同的经验。在孤寂的山间,他从自然界学到更多关于上帝品格的事,过于他在以前作王孙、作埃及国的保护性统治者的生活中所学的一切。他原是一个强大的将军,是一个敏于设计和执行的人,能即兴演讲,有雄辩的口才;然而他在长期离开埃及期间,不得不在很大的程度上丧失了他对语言的把握,以为自己是个不能言的人了。但上帝应许与他同在,并且问他:“谁造人的口呢?谁使人口哑、耳聋、目明、眼瞎呢?岂不是我耶和华吗?现在去吧,我必赐你口才,指教你所当说的话。摩西说:主啊,祢愿意打发谁,就打发谁去吧”(出4:11-13)!{MR926 24.4}[48]
§98 In his youthful experience in Egypt, Moses had been praised and petted, and he had attracted the people to himself. His praises had been sung as the chief captain of armies, and he was pleased and elated with flattery. But the Lord saw beneath the surface of outward appearance; He saw that Moses must have an altogether different kind of experience. Among the mountain solitudes he learned from nature far more in regard to the character of God than he had learned in all his previous life as the king’s grandson, the protective ruler of?the kingdom of Egypt. He was a mighty general of armies, he was a man quick to devise and execute, ready in speech, and eloquent in language; but during his long absence from Egypt he had to a great extent lost his command of the language, and thought himself unable to speak. But God promised to be with him, and asked, “Who hath made man’s mouth? Or who maketh the dumb, or deaf, or the seeing, or the blind? Have not I the Lord? Now therefore go, and I will be with thy mouth, and will teach thee what thou shalt say. And he said, O my Lord, send, I pray thee, by the hand of him whom thou shouldst send.” (margin).?{MR926 24.4}[48]
§99 摩西在从事牧人的职业时,对他自己能力的信心已经大大减少了。他到了柔和谦卑的地步,不再倚赖自己所受的教育,尽管那是能在埃及获得的最高等级的教育。在他的经验中,他已学会只能以上帝为自己的倚赖。这个教训是每一个想要得到不朽来生的人都必须知道的。摩西在孤寂的山间,在牧放群羊的时候学到的教训,使他有了那种正确的经验,以致他能被以色列的上帝——那位伟大的自有永有者安放在磐石穴中,并用上帝的手遮盖,叫他的生命不至因见上帝的面而被灭绝,耶和华将自己的荣耀显给他看,他便能够“恒心忍耐,如同看见那不能看见的主”(来11:27)。{MR926 25.1}[49]
§100 The confidence of Moses in his own abilities had greatly lessened while he was in the employment of a shepherd. He came into that meek, humble position where he did not trust in his education, though it was of the highest order that could be gained in Egypt. In his experience he had learned that he could make none but God his trust. This lesson is what each human being must know if he gains the future, immortal life. The lessons that Moses learned in the solitudes of the mountains, while he pastured the flock, gave him the right kind of experience, so that he could be taken by the God of Israel, the great I AM, and be placed in the cleft of the rock and covered with the hand of God, that his life should not be extinguished by a view of the face of God, and the Lord revealed to him His glory, and he was enabled to endure “as seeing Him who is invisible.”?{MR926 25.1}[49]
§101 上帝品格的这个启示得到了清楚的描绘,以便人学习关于上帝是什么的教训,学习这个,人就能始终看到自己人性的软弱和无效无能,可以认识到自己的力量消失了,因为没有东西喂养它。可拉、大坍、亚比兰的情况写在经上为的是警戒那些生活在这些末后日子的人。应当研究这些历史记录。亚伦成了摩西的代言人;由于亚伦和米利暗有幸参与圣工,他们就以为自己可以与摩西平起平坐,实在是伟大事业中不可或缺的一环。他们认为荣誉也应该给予他们,而不应让摩西独享。{MR926 25.2}[50]
§102 This revelation of the character of God is plainly delineated that man may learn the lesson as to what God is, and learning this, may ever see his own human weakness and inefficiency, and may realize that his strength is gone, for there is nothing given it to feed upon. The case of Korah, Dathan, and Abiram is written for the admonition of those who live in these last days. These histories are to be studied. Aaron was made mouth-piece for Moses, and because Aaron and Miriam were honored with a part in the work, they thought they were equal to Moses, and were indeed a very essential part of the great whole. They felt that credit should be given to them, and that Moses should not have all the honor.?{MR926 25.2}[50]
§103 世人应该记住,不论上帝把他们放在什么位置,他们都必须完全信靠上帝。永生世界未堕落生灵的义和这个因罪堕落的世界居民的义,都是有条件的,是基于他们对上帝律法的忠心顺从,这律法是圣洁、公义、良善的。一切受造之物都必须从上帝获得生命。没有一个人能成为善的或行善,只有当他过天天倚靠上帝的生活时才会这样。而且一个人若是不再与上帝有至关重要的关系了,也就不是义的了。上帝乃是一切美德、生命、爱与能力之源。植物只有在与土壤、空气、阳光、雨露有至关重要的关系的时候,才能保持其至关重要的性能。我们也必须与基督有这样的关系。然而太多的人将不适当的显要和荣耀归给人和尘世的成分,却看不见上帝的能力了;结果他们就被紧紧束缚在错误习惯和做法的奴役中。他们的道德品性是软弱的,因为没有藉着不断地操练来加强,以对付将在人生经验中出现的每一紧急情况。{MR926 25.3}[51]
§104 Let the human agent consider that in any position where God has placed him, he must put entire confidence in God. The righteousness of the unfallen beings of the eternal world, and of the inhabitants of this world fallen because of sin, is conditional upon their faithful obedience to the law of God, which is holy, just, and good. All created beings must derive their life from God. Not one can be, or do good, only as he lives in daily dependence upon God. And not a soul is righteous any longer than he is in vital relation to God, the source of all virtue, of life, of love, of power. A plant can retain its vital properties only as it is in vital relation with the soil, the air, the light, the dew, the showers. Even so must we be in relation with Christ. But too many give undue prominence and glory to mere human and earthly elements, and lose sight of the divine power; as the result they are held fast in the slavery of wrong habits and practices. The moral attributes are weak because they are not strengthened by constant exercise to meet every emergency that shall appear in the life experience.?{MR926 25.3}[51]
§105 就你来说,上帝的判断已经受到质疑,因为它行事与你那不正当的堕落意志不一致。上帝被人误解,他们感到确信比上帝更了解和认识他们自己。他们像你已经做过的一样问:“上帝为什么这么做呢?”“上帝为什么不那么做呢?”他们自己有限的想法会为上帝作出规定,规划祂的道路,设法使祂迎合他们自己人意的标准。{MR926 25.4}[52]
§106 The judgment of God has, with you, been questioned because it did not act in harmony with the perverse and degenerate will of yours. God is misinterpreted by human agents who feel sure they understand and know themselves better than God knows them. They ask, as you have done, “Why does God do this?” And, “Why does God not do that?” Their own finite?ideas would prescribe for God, and mark out His way, seeking to bring Him to their own human standard.?{MR926 25.4}[52]
§107 我蒙赐予一个图例,看到一棵结满美好果子的树。我蒙指示看到范妮在采集果子,一些熟了,是最好的,一些还没有成熟。她将它放进她的围裙里,说:“这是我的。它是我的。”我说:“范妮,你确实在要求不属于你的东西。那果子属于那棵树。任何一个人都可以采摘和享用它,但它属于那棵树。”{MR926 26.1}[53]
§108 An illustration was given me of a tree full of beautiful fruit. I was shown Fannie gathering the fruit, some ripe, the best, some unripe. She put it in her apron, and said, “This is mine. It is mine.” I said, “Fannie, you are certainly claiming that which is not yours. That fruit belongs to that tree. Any one may pluck and enjoy it, but it belongs to that tree.”?{MR926 26.1}[53]
§109 分辨善恶的能力是来自上帝的一个特性,人若与上帝没有至关重要的联络,就无法看透属灵的事。他们会称善为恶,称恶为善。所罗门的祈祷是:“求祢赐我智慧,可以判断祢的民,能辨别是非”(王上3:9)。要获得最高地位的企图对人来说是一个可怕的网罗。有一种高举自我和荣耀自我的影响如同有毒的瘴气,甚至在那些以为自己在从事传道工作的人中间也是如此。自我交织在他们一切的行为中;他们享受同情,渴望得到称赞;他们从犯错的、缺乏辨识力的、渴望赞许的人聚集他们的力量。当那些品格相似的人联合在一起时,他们不会吃天使的食物,而会吃那有如所多玛的苹果的果子,徒有其表。凡与那些会赞美奉承他们的人连在一起的人,都是将自己的灵魂捆绑在不圣洁的纽带中;他们若不挣脱这些纽带,将感情集中在上帝身上,就必太晚发现自己是赤身的,没有基督的义袍。{MR926 26.2}[54]
§110 The power of discerning good and evil is an attribute from God, and unless the human agents are in vital connection with God, they cannot discern spiritual things. They will call good evil, they will call evil good. The prayer of Solomon was, “Give thy servant an understanding heart, that I may judge thy people, that I may discern between good and bad.” The attempt to gain supremacy is a terrible snare to the soul. There is an influence of self exaltation and glorification that is as poisonous malaria, even among those who think they are engaged in missionary work. Self is interwoven in all they do; they feast upon sympathy, and hunger to receive praise; they gather their power from human beings, who are erring, wanting in discernment, panting for approbation. When those of a like character associate together, it is not to partake of angels’ food, but to eat of the fruit which is as the apples of Sodom. All who link themselves with those who will praise and flatter them, are binding their souls in unholy bonds; and unless they break these bonds, and fasten their affections upon God, they will too late find themselves naked, destitute of the robe of Christ’s righteousness.?{MR926 26.2}[54]
§111 我现在处大考验中。我看到范妮没有明白属灵的事。她不知道她是在接受撒但的奉承,对她自己、她的能力和她的效率有虚荣的想法,自鸣得意、自以为是的想法。宝贵的矿石已变得如此彻底地与渣滓混在一起,以致在每一个有利的场合,渣滓都浮现出来。她对她自以为出众的想法和观点有夸大之词,有一种表面工夫,一种惊人的活跃,然而唉,却那么少有基督的真正柔和谦卑的稳健。{MR926 26.3}[55]
§112 I am now in great trial. I see that Fannie has not understood spiritual things. She knew not that she was entertaining Satan’s flatteries in vain thoughts, flattering thoughts of herself, her capabilities, and her efficiency. The precious ore has become so thoroughly mixed with the dross that on every favorable occasion the dross appears. There is exaggeration with her of her own supposed superior ideas and sentiments, there is a surface work, a wonderful activity, but O, so little soundness of the genuine meekness and lowliness of Christ.?{MR926 26.3}[55]
§113 当我采取我很遗憾要采取的立场,以致不能一贯地继续与范妮联络,像以往那样将我的著作委托给她时,一些人会对我作出错误的判断,因为他们以为她真诚地悔改了;但事实上她并没有尊重我的著作,会危及我蒙主呼召要做的工作。事实上她的意念常常能被仇敌再三玩弄,以致她会被诱导照她以往那样看待我的著作,会受试探将它们置于不利地位。过去的这种经验已经形成一种思想模式,且已形成了她的意念和判断。我看不到将主赐给我的材料交在一个品格发展如此不稳定不可靠的人手里有什么安全,她需要不断得到平衡,否则就会跑入歧途,进入撒但可能选择带领的道路。范妮如此深陷在对她自己的高估里,以致对她的意念施加的任何相反的影响都会按照仇敌的品性遭到抵抗。环境、冲动赋予了整个生活基调和品质。在这件很容易陷于危险的事上有太大太重要的利益处于危险中。要是我同意范妮留下来参与工作,就会不断有不祥之兆压迫我,因为这些品格成分是不容易改变的。她所经手的工作,她不一定赏识为必要的或重要的,要是她敢做,她就会全部给它们加上她的模子。{MR926 26.4}[56]
§114 When I take the position which I am sorry, very sorry, to take, that I cannot consistently continue the connection with Fannie by entrusting her with my writings as I have done, some will misjudge me because they think she has sincerely repented; but the fact that she has not had respect for the writings, will endanger the work I am called of the Lord to do. The fact that her mind could be tampered with so often again and again by the enemy, that she could be led to regard the writings as she has regarded them, will be a temptation to place them at a disadvantage. This past experience has given a mold to the thoughts, and has fashioned the mind and judgment. I can see no safety in trusting the matter the Lord shall give me in the hands of one of such unstable, unreliable developments of character that a balance wheel is needed constantly, else she will be running off on a side track where Satan may choose to lead the way. Fannie is so wrapped up in her own exalted estimation of herself that any contrary influence that has been brought to bear upon her mind meets with a resistance that is according to the attributes of the enemy. The surroundings, the impulses, give tone and character to the whole life. There are too large and important interests at stake in this matter to be lightly imperiled. Should I consent that Fannie remain in connection with the work, there would be a constant burden of foreboding upon me, for these elements of character are not easily changed. The work which she has handled, she does not always appreciate as necessary or essential, and if she dared, would mold them all over.?{MR926 26.4}[56]
§115 耶和华上帝看透人的思想,也听到人口中所出的每一句话。祂能藉着使某些成分离开祂的工作来使弯曲的事变直。然而要是我试图向那些并不赏识我工作的属灵性质的人维护我的做法,就只会使我自己和工作遭受误解和歪曲。将这事摆在别人面前是没有用的,因为只有很少的人真的与上帝有如此的联络,能看到表面以下,以致理解这事。这是一种我无法解释的工作。{MR926 27.1}[57]
§116 The Lord God is a discerner of the thoughts, as well as a hearer of every word that falls from human lips. He can make crooked things straight by disconnecting certain elements from His work. But should I attempt to vindicate my course to those who do not appreciate the spiritual character of the work which is laid upon me; it would only expose myself and the work to misconception and misrepresentation. To present the matter before other minds would be useless, for there are but few who are really so connected with God [who] see beneath the surface appearance as to understand it. This work is one that I cannot explain.?{MR926 27.1}[57]
§117 采取我现在确信必须采取的这一步使我心中非常痛苦。当我说范妮从未喜爱这工作的性质时,我说的是真话。她还从未看出这工作的性质,她的本性和性情是这样的,以致我确信若没有品格的完全改变,她就决不会对这工作有比现在更多的认识。这工作对她和别人如同一块跌人的磐石,使他们绊跌,因为他们不知道它内在的神圣关系;它对他们来说全是外在的,他们自己从未对它的性质有过经验。范妮现在正经历的失败的屈辱和心灵的痛苦,我不能误解为悔改或归正,或品格的改变。{MR926 27.2}[58]
§118 To take the step which I am now convicted must be taken causes me much suffering of mind. When I state that Fannie never has loved the character of the work, I state the truth. She has never yet discerned its nature, and her nature and temperament are such that I am convinced that unless there is an entire transformation of character, she will never know more of it that she does at present. It is as a rock of offense for her and others to stumble over because they do not know and, unless they are converted, they can never know the inwardness of its sacred bearings; it is all outside of them, having never experienced the nature of it for themselves. The mortification of failure and the anguish of mind that Fannie is now passing through, I cannot mistake for repentance, or conversion, or transformation of character.?{MR926 27.2}[58]
§119 就在来到这个国家之前,为了帮助范妮,我同意在她现在向我重申她对于这工作的情绪已完全改变之后,再给她一次试验。我听从了我最佳的判断,违背我所有知道范妮的行动方针的朋友们,希望她能从上帝获得智慧,会真的喜爱这工作。我虽然知道她生性心理失衡,却想通过上帝所赐的亮光,不断发出的要向一些人提出明确责备向另一些人发出一般责备的呼吁,她会学到她有特权去学习的教训,变得在品格上有力量。这样她就能获得智慧,去预备放在她手中的宝贵材料,以便拯救她的灵魂和别人的灵魂。但她一直忙于别的事,那些事给她开了不同的通道使她全神贯注,以致她没有给予这工作适当的时间和适当的考虑。{MR926 27.3}[59]
§120 Just before coming to this country, in order to help Fannie I consented to make another trial after she had given me the assurance which she now repeats, that her feelings in regard to the work had wholly changed. I followed my best judgment, against all my friends who knew Fannie’s course of action, hoping she had gained wisdom from God, and would really love the work. I knew that she was naturally unbalanced in mind, but thought that through the light given of God, the appeals constantly made presenting definite reproofs to some and general reproofs to others, she would learn the lessons that it was her privilege to learn, and become strengthened in character. Thus she would obtain wisdom to prepare the precious matter placed in her hands, so that it might work for the saving of her soul as well as the souls of others. But she has been so occupied with other things which opened for her different avenues to engross the mind, that she does not give proper time and due consideration to the work.?{MR926 27.3}[59]
§121 她急速浏览内容,几乎一点没想这是来自上帝的重要内容,必须得到适当的关心。她提供她的措词,根据她人意的判断以为比文稿中的用词更好,这是不得不仔细防范的。她以一种并不是最好的方式完成了大量工作。圣事被弄成俗的了,并且以一种非常粗心冷漠无礼的方式受到了对待。{MR926 27.4}[60]
§122 She dashes through the matter with scarcely an idea that it is anything important coming from God, and that it must be duly cared for. She supplies her words, that in her human judgment she supposes are better than the words in the manuscript, which I have to critically guard. She accomplishes a large amount of work in a way that is not the best. Sacred things are made common, and are treated in a very careless and indifferent, irreverent manner.?{MR926 27.4}[60]
§123 现在那些对我的工作只有一点点经验上的认识的人,看不出为什么范妮不能比其他任何一个人更好地从事这项工作。她确实能干,他们说。但她已使自己习惯于仓促工作;她没有觉得她是在处理圣事,她已将她的精神和意见放进工作中。我祈愿上帝会使这个可怜的孩子归正,以便她能明白祂圣灵的带领。{MR926 27.5}[61]
§124 Now those who have but little experimental knowledge of my work do not see why Fannie cannot do this work better than any one else. Certainly she is capable, they say. But she has accustomed herself to work with a rush; she has not felt that she was handling anything sacred, and she has put her spirit and her feelings into the work. My prayer is that God will convert the poor child, that she may understand the leadings of His Holy Spirit.?{MR926 27.5}[61]
§125 扫罗的品格是很明显的。他既有力量也有软弱。他蒙赐予才干的恩赐,要是他将这些恩赐全然奉献给上帝,他原不会因他自己的罪过羞辱自己。矛盾的成分在他的品格上密切相关,他行事与上帝意见相左。有时他显出明显的单纯,然后就是嫉妒和傲慢精神的有罪表现。当概念临到他时,他会对一些讨他喜欢的人很温柔,充满同情,然后会不公正而且残忍地对待他最好的朋友们。当他被带到神圣声乐的影响之下时,他就会感染献身的精神,并在欣喜若狂的赞美和祈祷中倾诉最慷慨激昂的高言大志。还在这种兴奋之下时,他会使自己昼夜不休,直到反作用来到。于是他的力气没有了,他就筋疲力尽了。当野蛮的兴奋和过度热心的突然发作消失时,他就会显出自己旧有的性情。当他的意愿受阻时,他就处在狂怒状态,他的言语和行为就具有一种完全使他自己蒙羞的性质,也使上帝更加蒙羞。善与恶始终在冲突,邪恶始终力争掌权。{MR926 28.1}[62]
§126 The character of Saul is a marked one. There was strength and weakness combined. Gifts of talent were bestowed upon him, and had he consecrated these gifts wholly to God, he would not have dishonored himself by his own transgression. Contradictory elements were bound up in his character, and he worked at cross purposes with God. At times he revealed marked simplicity, and then was guilty of manifesting a jealous and overbearing spirit. He would be very tender and full of sympathy toward some who pleased him, as the notion came upon him, and then would be unjust and cruel toward his best friends. When brought under the influence of sacred and vocal music, he would catch the spirit of devotion, and pour forth the most impassioned expressions of lofty eloquence, in ecstasies of praise and prayer. While under this excitement, he would give himself no rest day nor night until the reaction came. Then his strength failed, and he was exhausted. When the paroxysm of wild excitement and inordinate zeal had spent itself, he would reveal his old disposition. When his will was crossed, he was in a fury, and his words and deeds were of a character entirely dishonoring to himself, and more dishonoring to God. Good and evil were ever in collision, evil ever striving for the supremacy.?{MR926 28.1}[62]
§127 范妮,你若不重生,并且把握自己,你若不每一天每一时都寻求上帝的恩典,以上帝为你的盾牌,你就必遭受你灵魂的损失。你心灵的大斗争一直是为了得到认可。关于你在信仰上的真实立场,你欺骗了自己,也欺骗了别人。人们既被你外表的热心欺骗,就信任你很有灵性,而且意念的行动在意念重演。你喜爱人的赞美,并且认为人们给了你应有的赏识,其实他们在智慧上并不完全;你与人形成了联合,捆绑心灵远离上帝。难道这些欺骗要持续到寻求那唯独来自上帝的帮助已为时太晚的时候吗?宝贵的灵魂在他们自以为的考验、困惑和失望中,愿意寻求唯独来自上帝而不是来自犯错有限之人的的忠告吗?{MR926 28.2}[63]
§128 Fannie, unless you are born again, and take yourself in hand, unless you seek the grace of God every day and every hour, making God your shield, you will meet with the loss of your soul. The great strife of your soul has been for recognition. You have deceived yourself and deceived others in regard to your true standing religiously. Human beings, deceived by your apparent zeal, give you credit for advanced spirituality, and mind acts and re-acts upon mind. You enjoy human praise, and think that persons give you due appreciation, when they are not perfect in wisdom; links are formed with human agents that bind the soul away from God. Are these delusions to last until it is too late to seek that help which cometh alone from God? Will precious souls, in their supposed trials, perplexities and disappointments, seek counsel alone from God, not from erring, finite human beings??{MR926 28.2}[63]
§129 顺从上帝之路如同黎明的光,越照越明,直到日午。我们要攀登那个梯子。正是藉着信心和舍己的不同步骤才能到达梯子的顶部。凡选择受自己的判断和冲动指导的人,人生必定失败;因为他们丢弃上帝的道路,随从堕落易怒的人意。他们决心偏行己路。上帝有一项特别的工作给每一个人去做,那些本着基督的柔和谦卑信赖地从事这项工作的人,会做得很好。{MR926 28.3}[64]
§130 The path of obedience to God is as the shining light which shineth more and more unto the perfect day. We are to climb the rounds of the ladder. God is above it. His light is shining on every round of this ladder. It is by the difficult steps of faith and self-denial that the top of the ladder is reached. To all who choose to be guided by their own judgment and impulses, life will be a failure; for they discard God’s ways, and follow the human, perverse, passionate will. They are bent upon having their own way. God has a special work for every one to do, and those who do this work trustingly, in the meekness and lowliness of Christ, will do it well.?{MR926 28.3}[64]
§131 要当心,免得这些警告受到轻视,你就在着装上和世俗的做法上更深地陷入世俗的道路,最终发现门已关上,而你却在外面,是一个愚拙的童女。{MR926 28.4}[65]
§132 Take heed lest these warnings be lightly regarded, and you go far into the paths of worldliness in dress, worldliness of practices, and at last find that the door is shut, and you are outside, a foolish virgin.?{MR926 28.4}[65]
§133 《信函》1894年88号,全信,(致W.C.怀特,1894年2月6日)—昨天的邮件收到了一封我写的信。艾米丽抄写了一部分,有两页我说不必抄写,所以我没有寄出它们。你可能看不到什么,只看到关于那件已我心中非常痛苦的事的混乱想法。在巴特尔克里克,范妮努力辩解,流着泪来找我,要参与我为期刊预备文章的工作。她宣称自己已有大改变,根本不是她曾告诉我她想要自己写作、不能同意将她的才干埋没在为期刊和书籍预备我的文章这种工作的时候那个人了。她感到自己对这件事充满了兴趣并有才华,她必须用于写作,是她与我联络所不能做的。我说:“我现在就放开你,范妮。”但她坚持说她必须在她去安阿伯的时候坚持预备一些文章,而不是完全放手。玛丽安劝我最好这么做,因为要是我拒绝范妮的要求,会使她大感灰心。范妮后来说这些文章是救她免于灭亡的手段。你知道我现在看来当初同意她的要求与我一起来到这个国家很不明智,当时她流了许多眼泪,坚持说她会尽心心性投入自己的兴趣,她很肯定自己决不会使我再次因她的骄傲、自我野心和任性固执而使我忧伤困惑。这是怎么实现的你有所了解,但很少知道这件事的真实情况。然而在普雷斯顿发生的一切对我来说都是因她而造成的一系列痛苦、悲伤和苦闷。主在普雷斯顿给了我一生最蒙福的经验。祂使我在祂同在的爱中有平安和安息,祂的恩典使我保持了开朗、幸福和喜乐。在上帝以最奇妙的方式与我同工时,仇敌却在同样明显地与范妮同工。而且那种工作从那时一直持续到现在。我得了警告,但我没有遵照那些警告行事,以为我会在墨尔本,远远早于我实际去那里的时候。我们决定在惠灵顿举行帐篷大会造成的耽延,使我们留在了新西兰,远比我们预期的要久。{MR926 28.5}[66]
§134 Letter 88, 1894, entire letter. (To W. C. White, February 6, 1894)—The mail received a letter written by me yesterday. Emily copied a part of it, and two pages I said she need not copy and so I did not send them. You may not obtain any thing but a confused idea of the matter which has been the cause of great suffering of mind to me. In Battle Creek, Fannie pleaded hard and with tears to come with me to engage with me in the work of preparing articles for the papers. She declared she?had met with a great change, and was not at all the person she was when she told me she desired to write herself and could not consent that her talent would be buried up in the work of preparing my articles for the papers and books. She felt she was full of the matter and had talent she must put to use in writing which she could not do connected with me. I said, “I release you now, Fannie,” but she persisted that she must hold on to the preparation of some articles when she went to Ann Arbor, and not entirely let go. Marion persuaded me this I had better do, for it would be a great discouragement to Fannie if I refused her request. Fannie stated afterwards that these articles were the means of saving her from ruin. You know I was so unwise as it appears to me now, to grant her request to come with me to this country and throw in her interest heart and soul as she persisted with many tears she would do, and she was very positive she would never cause me sorrow and perplexity again because of her pride and self-ambition and self-will. How this had been fulfilled you know something, but very little of the real facts in the case are known. But all that occurred in Preston was one series of sufferings and distress and agony of mind to me on her account. The Lord gave me in Preston the most blessed experience of my life. He made me to have peace and rest in the love of His presence, and His grace kept me cheerful, happy and joyful. While God was working with me in a most wonderful manner, the enemy was working just as decidedly with Fannie. And that working has continued from that time till the present. Warnings were given me, but I did not act upon them, thinking I would be at Melbourne much sooner than I was. The delay in consequence of the camp-meeting we decided to have in Wellington, kept us in New Zealand for a much longer period than we anticipated.?{MR926 28.5}[66]
§135 div id=divObjc191608 class=col-md-12 column label style=font-weight:normal input type=radio name=sectionselect class=sectionselect hidden value=191608 span id=sectioncontent191608我在布莱顿帐篷大会期间非常痛苦,因为交给范妮的重要职位使她完全负责管理孩子们。考虑到她品格的状况,我明白别人应该知道这么做是不对的。别人本应该与她联合工作,以便弥补她自己看不出来的自身品格的缺陷,然而在将她安置在如此负责的岗位时,别人应该聪明到能看出这些缺陷,并且在每一点上都要提防这些缺陷。但我当时不能改变局面,而且我肯定不能在那项工作中与她联合,因为我在普雷斯顿和新西兰的时候已经得到了警告。你离开墨尔本之后,我感到非常痛苦。我有一个负担,为我工作的将来有一个大负担,我看不出如何改变局面。警告再次来到:“范妮是你的敌人,正在藉着怀有撒但在伊甸园中曾给夏娃的那种建议误导人心。”她纵容野心,喜爱受人称赞,她对自己的能力和才干的想法为撒但敞开了门户让他进来,不仅要毁灭她的灵魂,而且要危害上帝赐给我的工作。{MR926 29.1}[67]
§136 I was greatly pained during the camp meeting in Brighton at the positions of trust given to Fannie in placing upon her so fully the responsibility of the children. I knew that others ought to know it was not a proper thing to do, in consideration of her make-up in character. Others should have been connected with her to make up for deficiencies she could not discern existed in herself, but others ought to be intelligent to discern these defects, and guard on every point against them, in placing her in so responsible a place. But I was not able to change the order of things, and I positively could not unite with her in that work for reason of the warnings I had received while in Preston and New Zealand. After you had left Melbourne I felt very much distressed. I had a burden, a great burden for the future of my work, and I could not discern how to change the order of things. Again the warning came, “Fannie is your adversary, and is misleading minds by entertaining the suggestions of Satan as did Eve in Eden.” Her love of ambition, her love of praise, and her idea of her own ability and talents was the open door Satan had entered to not only ruin her soul, but to imperil the work given me of God.?{MR926 29.1}[67]
§137 关于这事现在怎样,我应该如何对付它,我心中沮丧痛苦几乎无可估量时,斯塔尔长老有了负担,关于范妮的思维方式,我认为我不应该被撇在黑暗中。她曾向斯塔尔长老做过一些声明,我想我在前一封信中提到过,问他是否认为在别人与怀著的预备工作大有关系时将出版怀著的荣誉全部归于怀姐妹是正确的,她向他作出的奇怪声明说明她的心被撒但的能力影响了。{MR926 29.2}[68]
§138 While I was depressed in mind and distressed almost beyond measure, as to what was the matter now, and how I should meet it, Elder Starr was burdened and I thought I should not be left in darkness in reference to the workings of the mind of Fannie. She had made statements to Elder Starr which I think I mentioned in my former letter, asking him if he thought it was right to give all the credit to Sr. White for the published writings when others had so much to do in their preparation, and she made strange statements to him which?shows a mind influenced by the power of Satan.?{MR926 29.2}[68]
§139 我在与范妮交谈时,请她告诉我她要怎么做。难道要发表说怀爱伦夫人、范妮·博尔顿和玛丽安·戴维斯是与这些作品有关的一班人吗?她说:“哦,我不知道,我不知道。我受了试探。我充满了骄傲。”好了,说了相当多,我不能花时间写出来。我已明白地告诉她,我不敢再雇用她了,因为她的心门已向任何试探敞开。她与其发声说出撒但的建议,当作是上帝的声音,为何不像一个忠心的工人,向有关的那一位公开这事呢?她为何不跟我说一句话,反而去找艾米丽[坎贝尔]和梅[沃林]并与她们谈论呢?{MR926 30.1}[69]
§140 In the conversation I had with Fannie, I asked her to tell me what she would have done. Should it be published Mrs. E. G. White, Fannie Bolton, and Marion Davis are a company concern in these productions? “Oh,” she says, “I do not know, I do not know. I have been tempted. I am full of pride.” Well, considerable was said which I cannot take time to write. I have told her plainly, I dare not employ her longer, for the door of her heart was open to any and every temptation. In the place of her voicing the suggestions of Satan as the voice of God, why did she not, like a faithful worker, open the matter to the one concerned? Why did she not utter a word to me but go to Emily [Campbell] and May [Walling] and talk with them??{MR926 30.1}[69]
§141 我发现她与科尔科德夫妇、索尔兹伯里姐妹谈过,她还与多少别人谈过仍有待发现。这难道不是叛徒的作为吗?这样一个人有什么伤害我的事做不出来呢?她在那些对上帝赐给我的工作没有经验认识的人心中撒播怀疑和质问。{MR926 30.2}[70]
§142 I find she has talked with Colcord and his wife, Sister Salisbury and how many others remain to be developed. Is not this the work of a traitor? What harm could not such an one do me in sowing doubts and questionings in the minds of those who have not an experimental knowledge in the work given me of God??{MR926 30.2}[70]
§143 她对斯塔尔长老说:“我有一些宝贵的想法是主赐给我的,我已经跟玛丽安讲过这些了,随后她将那些想法放进怀姐妹关于《基督生平》的文章中,人们就以为那些想法是怀姐妹的想法了。”她还认为将她的才华埋没在被认为是怀姐妹的著作之下得不到承认是不对的。谁想到她竟将她的话语和她的观念取代在怀姐妹的著作中交给她的话语和观念呢?她对我说:“哦,我已将我的生命投入到那些已发表的文章中了。”好了,这是不正确的言论。我并不希望她的生命或言语或观念进入这些文章中。这个气泡越早破裂,所有相关的人就越有必要理解这种惊人的才干,范妮也越能恢复理智。我现在不知道我们要怎么出来,我要做什么。我担心范妮不可信任。我告诉她,她一直在撒播恶种,像蒺藜的种子,是她永远无法收集起来的。一个这么缺少判断力,这么不谨慎以致看不出因果,反而继续自己败坏的想象,将撒但的建议倾倒进别人心里的人,是不可信赖的。这是叛徒的工作。要是她做成了工作,像她对别人描绘的她已经做了一样,以致她认为应该因她带进我工作中的才干将荣誉归给她,那么就是这个工作组解散的时候了。要是她做了这种工作,就是她已向别人描绘的她的才干、她的观念和造句与我的一样多,在“美丽的语言”方面也是这样,那么她就做了一项我已再三叮嘱不应该做的工作;她就不配与这工作有任何关系了。{MR926 30.3}[71]
§144 She says to Elder Starr, “I have some precious thoughts the Lord gives me, and I have expressed these to Marion, and the next thing she puts them in Sr. White’s articles on the Life of Christ, and they are supposed to be her thoughts.” And to have her talent buried up and unrecognized beneath the writings that pass for Sister White she does not think is right. Who has supposed she was putting her words and her ideas in the place of the words and ideas given to her in the writings of Sister White? “Oh,” she said to me, “I have put my life into those articles published.” Now, it is not a correct statement. I want not her life, or words, or ideas into these articles. And the sooner this bubble is burst, the better for all concerned, the necessity for this wonderful talent be understood, and Fannie come to her senses. I have now no knowledge of how we shall come out, and what I shall do. I am afraid that Fannie cannot be trusted. I told her she had been sowing the seeds of evil, like thistle’s seed, that she can never gather up. A person with so little judgment and caution that cannot discern from cause to effect, but goes on in her own perverse imaginings, and pours out the suggestions of Satan into other minds is not to be trusted. It is the work of a traitor. If she has done the work, as she has represented to other minds she has done, so that she thinks credit should be given her for her talent brought into my writings, then it is time that this firm is dissolved. If she has done this work, which she has represented to others has been as much her talent, her production of ideas and construction of sentences as mine, and in “beautiful language,” then she has done a work I have urged should not be done, again and again; and she is unworthy of any connection with this work.?{MR926 30.3}[71]
§145 现在留下的是文章要受到严密检查并相应地作出决定,因为这不可只是一带而过。酵已放在别人心里,却没有向我提一个建议,这些想法其实只应向我表达。她认为这些人能做什么来缓和局势,竟向他们如此自由地敞开心扉呢?她在普雷斯顿的房子里和我在一起,她却和梅·沃林谈话,也和新参与我工作的艾米丽·坎贝尔谈话。我就在房子里。她在任何时间都可以跟我讲,但她却没有来就这事跟我讲一句话或给一个暗示。足足两年之久这种酵一直影响着她的头脑,还影响了其他多少人的心,将整件事置于疑云之下,惟有审判的时候才能显明。这是出于人的还是出于神的呢?上帝所赐给我的工作已在她的估计中被放在与她自己的作品一样的水平,而且这就是她给出的印象。{MR926 30.4}[72]
§146 Now it remains that the articles be examined critically and decisions be made accordingly, for this must not go with only a passing notice. The leaven has been placed in other minds and not one suggestion expressed to me, the only one to whom these thoughts should be expressed. What did she think these persons could do to relieve the situation to whom she has opened her mind so freely? She was in the house with me in Preston, and she talked with May Walling, and Emily Campbell who was newly connected with me and my work. I was in the house. She could speak to me any time, but not one word or hint of this matter came to me. For two full years this leaven has been affecting her mind, and how many other minds the?judgment alone can reveal, of putting the whole matter under a cloud and doubt. Is it human or divine? The work God has given me has been placed in her estimation on a level with her own productions, and this is the impression she has given.?{MR926 30.4}[72]
§147 我能尽量向你说明的是,她以极其夸张的方式描绘得好像我笔下的作品更多是她的才干塑造的,而不是出于我,是她全盘制作的,她就是这样向我描绘的。我告诉她,我将著作放在她手中,一再对你说我希望我的词语和我的观念要出现在每一情况。她不可用她的词语或观念来取代。我不希望我的话被改变成她的话。{MR926 31.1}[73]
§148 As near as I can represent it to you is, that she has in a most exaggerated way represented as though the productions from my pen were more the mold of her talent than anything from me, that she made it all over, thus she has represented to me. I told her that I have placed the writings in her hands and repeated to you over and over again that I wanted my words and my ideas to appear in every case. She must not substitute her words or her ideas. I want not my words to be changed for her words.?{MR926 31.1}[73]
§149 她说W.C.怀特曾读过她只是照着我的指示准备的文章,并告诉她,她必须对它多做一些,等等。现在我有麻烦,这事必须解决。我认为范妮的影响是不好的,虽然她显得是一个热心的工人,特别忙,但是她的影响却不具有正确的品质。我告诉她,我看不出继续让她与我联络我怎么能感到一点安全。我与她没有和谐的精神。既然她在声称被如此伟大的传道精神充满并且自称是圣工中非常热心的工人的时候都能如此彻底地被欺骗,我还能期望她将来怎样呢?{MR926 31.2}[74]
§150 She stated that W.C.W. had read articles she had done just according to my directions in preparing, and he told her she must do more to it, etc. Now I am in trouble and this matter must be settled. I think Fannie’s influence is not good, and while she appears to be a zealous worker, she is awful busy, yet the influence is not of the right quality. I told her I could not see how I could feel the least safety in keeping her connected with me. I had had no harmony of spirit with her. And if she could be so thoroughly deceived when she claimed to be imbued with so great a missionary spirit, and to be so zealous a worker in the cause, what could I expect in the future??{MR926 31.2}[74]
§151 所赐的亮光是:“她是你敌人。”有一次赐给我的亮光是关于亚伦和米利暗的。他们二人都居于显要职位。二人在百姓的估计中都仅次于摩西。最初在天庭带来不和的同样的精神,在米利暗心中发芽了,她便向亚伦重述了她的想法,就是他们没有得到应得的荣誉。她有能力以一种获得同情的方式提出这事,好像她一直受了忽视,她的才干没有得到认可,亚伦的才干也没有得到认可。请阅读这段历史和记载在《先祖与先知》第368-371页的内容。亚伦已经成了摩西的代言人,米利暗则是妇女的教师。然而现在哥哥和姐姐之间的低语却在抱怨和嫉妒摩西,他们有了不忠的罪,不仅不忠于上帝指定给他们的领袖,也不忠于上帝自己。主没有任由这种为他们自己的尊贵和荣耀而心生嫉妒的重担被栽植在以色列全营的心里,了解众人心中隐秘事的主将这件事接管到自己的手中;因为这事若不得到纠正,就会在以色列营中造成一起叛乱:“耶和华在云柱中降临,站在会幕门口,召亚伦和米利暗,二人就出来了。耶和华说:‘你们且听我的话:你们中间若有先知,我耶和华必在异象中向他显现,在梦中与他说话。我的仆人摩西不是这样;他是在我全家尽忠的。我要与他面对面说话,乃是明说,不用谜语,并且他必见我的形像。你们毁谤我的仆人摩西,为何不惧怕呢’”(民12:5-8)?{MR926 31.3}[75]
§152 The light given was, “She is your adversary.” The light given me on one occasion was that of Aaron and Miriam. They both occupied a prominent position. Both stood in estimation of the people, only second to Moses. The same spirit that first brought discord in heaven, sprung up in the heart of Miriam, and she repeated to Aaron her thoughts, that due credit was not given to them. She had ability to place this matter in a light to gain sympathy, as though she had been kept out of sight, and her talent not recognized, neither was Aaron’s. Please read the history and that written in?Patriarchs and Prophets, 368-371. Aaron had been mouth-piece for Moses, and Miriam was a teacher of the women. But now come whisperings between the brother and the sister in murmurings and jealousies against Moses, and they were guilty of disloyalty, not only to their leader appointed of God but God Himself. This burden of jealousy for their own honor and glory were not left to be planted in the minds of the camp of Israel, but the Lord who reads the secrets of all hearts takes this matter in hand; for the matter left to go uncorrected would create a rebellion in the camp of Israel: [Numbers 12:5-8?quoted.]?{MR926 31.3}[75]
§153 范妮说了什么话呢?难道上帝没有看到嫉妒的精神,野心和骄傲的精神在力争人的尊荣和认可吗?这段历史被设计为一个警告,是给凡要采取与亚当和米利暗相似做法之人的。了解人心的主必揭露黑暗的隐密事,也必显明人心的谋算。那些给撒但的建议留地步,拼死努力渴望他们自以为拥有的才干得到认可的人,会被仇敌弄瞎了心眼,以致看不出圣事与俗事的区别。他们会控告那些已蒙上帝呼召在祂圣工中担任某些职位的人。{MR926 31.4}[76]
§154 What words have been spoken by Fannie? Hath not God seen the spirit of jealousy, the spirit of ambition and pride struggling for human honor and recognition? This history is designed as a warning to all who will pursue a similar course as Aaron and Miriam. He who reads the heart will bring to light the hidden things of darkness, and will make manifest the counsels of the heart. Those who give place to Satan’s suggestions in their desperate efforts in panting for recognition of talents they flatter themselves that they possess, will be so blinded by the enemy that they will not discern sacred things in distinction from the common. They will bring accusations against those whom God has called to act in certain positions in His cause.?{MR926 31.4}[76]
§155 我给你写得相当充分了,我留给你照你的最佳判断行事。玛丽安没有看出这件事的内部运作,已经在一定程度上被范妮对这件事的陈述所欺骗和影响了。我们现在被迫看到表面以下。但我将这件事交给你按照你认为最好的去做。我处在严重的困惑中,当我看到撒但如何作工要使应该聪明锐利如钢以便明白他们在上帝面前的位置和他们与这工作有分的特权与尊荣的人,变得不忠心、猜测和低声传播邪恶并将之放进别人心里的时候,就是采取决定性措施的时候了,要在不满得到进一步传播之前予以纠正。{MR926 31.5}[77]
§156 I have written to you quite fully, and I leave it with you to act as you shall judge best. Marion has not discerned the inward working of this matter, and has been deceived and affected in a degree by Fannie’s statements of the case. We are now compelled to look deeper than the surface. But?I leave this matter for you to do as you think best. I am in a very grave perplexity and when I see how Satan works to take the very ones who ought to be intelligent and sharp as steel to understand their position before God, and their privileges and honor to have a part in the work, become disloyal, surmising, and whispering evil and putting the same into other minds, it is time decisive measures are taken that will correct the disaffection before it shall spread farther.?{MR926 31.5}[77]
§157 我现在要说,我们一般来说都很好。我当然不好,而是烦恼困惑。你在阅读我的信之后要通过电报传话给我,因为我会期待你来信。今天有望收到来自美国的邮件。{MR926 32.1}[78]
§158 I will now say, we are all generally well. I of course am not but troubled and perplexed. Send me word after you read my letters by telegram when I may expect you. Letters are expected today from American mail.?{MR926 32.1}[78]
§159 请仔细查问关于马和马车还有家庭用品的事。我们可以把马赶过去。司提反在去悉尼的途中已经走了大半的路,来说要是我们希望他过去,他就会乘车过去。你可以问问乘船走是不是最好,还有关税和运费,你一查明就要写给我们。向所有在真道上的人致以多多的爱意。{MR926 32.2}[79]
§160 Please make close inquiry in regard to the horse and phaeton and household goods. We can drive the horse through. Stephen has been with his trap more than half way to Sydney, and says he will drive through if we want him to. You can inquire whether it is best to go by boat, and the expense of duties and freightage, and write as soon as you ascertain. Much love to all in the faith.?{MR926 32.2}[79]
§161 《信函》1894年6号,全信,(致范妮·博尔顿,1894年2月10日)—我收到并阅读了你的信,并向你保证我的心因信中的内容深受触动。我接受你的忏悔。就你自己和你与我个人的关系而言,我已确实白白地饶恕了你。我拒绝见你是因为我不清楚将来。我希望一直将这个问题放在上帝面前,并以祂的眼光看待我们将来在工作中彼此的关系,按照祂的旨意行事。祂从起初看到末后。祂知道一切的事。过去、现在和将来对祂来说都是完全清楚的。如果我们在工作中合作对我们有益并且能荣耀祂,更加充分地了解这工作的神圣性质,藉着耶稣基督的恩典设法达到最高要求,我就会放心了。基督的恩典是白白赐给祂的工人的,只要他们向祂求。我会接受现状,设法在各方面以完全柔和谦卑的心去做祂已赐给我的这项工作,以便荣耀不至归于人,而是丰富地回归主,祂已赐下智慧和能力好从事这项工作。{MR926 34.1}[80]
§162 Letter 6, 1894, entire letter. (To Fannie Bolton, February 10, 1894)—I received and read your letter, and assure you that my heart is deeply touched by its contents. I accept your confession. As far as yourself and your connection with me personally is concerned, I have and do freely forgive you. I have declined to see you for the reason that I am not clear in reference to the future. I want to keep this question constantly before God, and view the future of our relationship to each other in the work in His light, and move in His counsel. He sees the end from the beginning. He knows all things. Past, present and future are all clear to Him.?If it is for our good and His glory that we cooperate in the work, understanding more fully its sacred character, seeking to meet the highest requirements, through the grace of Jesus Christ, freely given to His workers if they ask Him, I shall be relieved. I would accept the situation, and seek in every way to do this His work which He has given me to do in all meekness and lowliness of mind, in order that the glory shall not come to the human agents, but flow back in rich streams to Him who hath given wisdom and ability to do this work.?{MR926 34.1}[80]
§163 主熟悉我们各人。每一个生到世上的人都蒙主分派了工作,为的是使世界更好,而且在从事上帝指定给我们的工作时,我们也使自己更好;因为我们在从事上帝赐给我们的工作时,我们个人就活出律法和福音。每一个人都有自己的范围,要是人以上帝为顾问,就不会有与上帝的旨意相左的事。祂给每一个人都分派了一个地方和一份工作,我们个人若是将自己交给主去支使,无论生活可能在我们眼中看来多么混乱纠结,上帝都有旨意在其中,人的机器既服在上帝智慧的手下,就会成就上帝的旨意。就像在一支训练有素的军队里,每一个士兵都在上帝的大工中分派了工作。{MR926 35.1}[81]
§164 The Lord is acquainted with us individually. Everyone born into the world is given his or her work to do, for the purpose of making the world better, and in doing our God-appointed work, we make ourselves better; for in doing the work given us of God, we individually live out the law and the gospel. Each one has his sphere, and if the human agent makes God his counsellor, then there will be no working at cross purposes with God. He allots to everyone a place and a work, and if we individually submit ourselves to be worked by the Lord, however confused and tangled life may seem to our eyes, God has a purpose in it all, and the human machinery, obedient under the hand of divine wisdom, will accomplish the purposes of God. As in a well-disciplined army, every soldier has his allotted work in the great work of God.?{MR926 35.1}[81]
§165 现在的人生显然不是上帝计划它应有的样子,而这就是为什么有那么多困惑的原因;因为有许多损耗和摩擦。男人或女人离开上帝赐给他或她的位置,为要取悦自己的爱好,按照自己的设计的计划行事,就必遭遇失望,因为他选择了自己的道路而不是上帝的道路。有些人接受了负责的岗位,却没能意识到责任,因而做了随便的工作。有些人则接受了一份他们并不适合的工作,他们一点也不赏识他们是在上帝的统管之下的事实,总是力求指导自己,控制自己的生命。有些个人则研究如何偏行己路,实现自己的计划,上帝就树立了祂的障碍,并不允许他们随意而行。他们因着创造也因着救赎而属于主,祂不会让他们偏行己路,总是设法为了他们自己的某个计划而将上帝的旨意放在一边。他们应当充任上帝分配给他们的位置,做主已交在他们手中的工作。任性和爱好不能成为现状的主人。{MR926 35.2}[82]
§166 Life as it now appears is not what God designed it should be, and this is why there is so much that is perplexing; for there is much wear and friction. The man or woman that leaves the place God has given him or her, in order to please inclination, and act on his own devised plan, meets with disappointment, because he has chosen his way instead of God’s way. There are those who accept positions of responsibility, but fail to sense the responsibility, and thus do haphazard work. Others accept a work for which they have no fitness, and they have no appreciation of the fact that they are under rule to God, and are ever striving to guide themselves, and to control their own being. Other individuals study to have their own way, and work out their plans, and God erects His barriers, and does not allow them to do as they would. They are the Lord’s by creation and by redemption, and He will not allow them to have their own way, and be ever trying to set aside the will of God for some plan of their own. They are to fill the place God allotted to them, and do the work the Lord has given into their hands. Willfulness and inclination cannot be the masters of the situation.?{MR926 35.2}[82]
§167 我们的天父是我们的主宰。我们必须服从祂的纪律。我们是祂家庭的成员。祂配受我们侍奉。如果祂家庭的一个成员坚持自己的方式,执意只做自己喜悦的事,那种精神就会导致混乱和困惑的事态。我们不可刻意随从己意,而要遵行上帝的道路和旨意。{MR926 35.3}[83]
§168 Our heavenly Father is our Ruler, and we must submit to His discipline. We are members of His family. He has a right to our service, and if one of the members of His family would persist in having his own way, persist in doing just that which he pleased, that spirit would bring about a disordered and perplexed state of things. We must not study to have our own way, but God’s way and God’s will.?{MR926 35.3}[83]
§169 我的姐妹,我现在觉得要让上帝讲话,而我们要说:“上帝啊,只要照祢的意思成就,不要照我的意思。”我深知人类因偏离上帝为他们所指定的道路而受了许多苦。他们行在自己所点的火把中,其必然结果就是患难、不安和忧愁,他们如果使自己的意愿服从上帝,让祂控制他们的道路,这一切原是可以避免的。上帝看到需要抵制我们的意愿和作风,驯服我们人的意志。惟有上帝为我们所选择的道路,为我们的脚步所指定的途径,才是平安稳妥的。我们要每天怀着孩子般顺服的精神,祈求我们的眼睛被敷上属天的眼药,以识别上帝旨意的显示,免得我们思想混乱,因为我们的意志似乎要掌管一切。我们必须用信心的眼光,作为顺命的儿女以孩子般的顺服仰望上帝,听从祂的引导。这样,一切困难都会消除。主应许说:“我要教导你,指示你当行的路;我要定睛在你身上劝戒你”(诗32:8)。{MR926 35.4}[84]
§170 I feel now, my sister, that let God speak, and we will say, “Not my will, but Thy will, O God be done.” I know that human beings suffer much because they step out of the path that God has chosen for them to follow. They walk in the sparks of the fire they have kindled themselves, and the sure result is affliction, unrest and sorrow, which they might have avoided if they had submitted their will to God, and have permitted Him to control their ways. God sees that it is necessary to oppose our will and our way, and bring our human will into subjection. Whatever path God chooses for us, whatever way He ordains for our feet, that is the only path of safety. We are?daily to cherish a spirit of childlike submission, and pray that our eyes may be anointed with the heavenly eyesalve in order that we may discern the indications of the divine will, lest we become confused in our ideas, because our will seems to be all controlling. With the eye of faith, with childlike submission as obedient children, we must look to God, to follow His guidance, and difficulties will clear away. The promise is, “I will instruct thee, and teach thee; I will guide thee with Mine eye.”?{MR926 35.4}[84]
§171 主已应许要赐圣灵给求祂的人。我们难道不要照上帝的话接受祂吗?我们如果怀着谦卑受教的精神来到上帝面前,不是在求告祂以前就拟好自己的一切计划,按照我们自己的意思行,而是存顺服的心,甘愿受教,本着信心,我们就有权利每日每时要求祂实现应许。我们可以不信任自己,我们需要谨防自己的爱好和强烈的倾向,免得我们随从自己的意见和计划,以为这是主的道路;然而但愿我们决不要不信任主的应许。{MR926 36.1}[85]
§172 The Lord has promised to give the Holy Spirit to them that ask Him. Shall we take God at His word? If we come to God in a humble and teachable spirit, not with our plans all formed before we ask Him, and shaped according to our own will, but in submission, in willingness to be taught in faith, it is our privilege to claim the promise every hour of the day. We may distrust ourselves, and we need to guard against our inclinations and strong tendencies, lest we shall follow our mind and plans, and think it is the way of the Lord; but let us never disbelieve the word of the promise.?{MR926 36.1}[85]
§173 真实持久的幸福不会来自任何一个人。我们可能有特选的朋友,在我们完全没有察觉也没有承认的情况下,就被我们在心中置于上帝应有的位置,我们也决不能完善一种完全完整的基督徒经验,直到每一尘世的支持都被挪去,心灵将全部的情感都集中在上帝身上。“若不是耶和华建造房屋,建造的人就枉然劳力;若不是耶和华看守城池,看守的人就枉然警醒”(诗127:1)。{MR926 36.2}[86]
§174 True and abiding happiness can never be derived from any human being. We may have special, select friends that, all unperceived and unacknowledged by us, we place in the heart where God should be, and we can never perfect a round, full Christian experience until every earthly support is removed, and the soul centers its entire affections about God. “Except the Lord build the house, they labor in vain that build it: Except the Lord keep the city, the watchmen waketh but in vain.”?{MR926 36.2}[86]
§175 需要不断地看守自然的情感和我们本心的倾向,免得我们变得与上帝疏远,将我们的感情放在人身上,以致羞辱上帝;因为我们若不警醒祷告并且怀有生发仁爱和洁净心灵的信心,我们的幸福就必受到危害。我们必须以上帝为我们所倚赖的。{MR926 36.3}[87]
§176 There is need of watching unceasingly the natural affections and tendencies of our own hearts, lest we become estranged from God, and place our affections on human beings to the dishonor of God; for our happiness will be imperiled unless we watch, and pray, and cherish the faith that works by love and purifies the soul. We must make God our trust.?{MR926 36.3}[87]
§177 现在,范妮,我渴望你一切都好,希望你在任何一方面都没有一点虚荣心。我为你有负担。我希望你成功地克服每一个想要虚荣或属世或自负的试探;因为这对灵性来说就是死。这使我们的心灵向撒但的建议敞开。我确信我们来自美国的姐妹在许多方面对上帝在这个国家的人中间的工作发挥了非常有害的影响,在她们的心中和品格上必须天天体验到上帝使人归正的能力,否则撒但就会利用她们去诱捕别人,尽管她们就表面而言可能热心地从事传道工作,可是上帝却受到了羞辱,上帝没有在凡事上得到荣耀,天国也失望了。{MR926 36.4}[88]
§178 Now Fannie, I am desirous for your best good, and wish that you may not have the least bit of vanity of mind in any direction. I am burdened for you. I want you should make a success of overcoming every temptation to be vain, or worldly, or self-sufficient; for it is death to spirituality. It places our souls open to the suggestions of Satan. O, I am sure our sisters from America in many respects have done great harm in influence to the work of God among the people of this country, and the converting power of God must be daily realized in their hearts and upon their characters, else Satan will use them as decoys to souls, although they may be zealously engaged in missionary work as far as appearances go, and yet God has been dishonored, God has not been glorified in all things, and heaven is disappointed.?{MR926 36.4}[88]
§179 我寄这些内容给你好叫你放心,如有可能,就确信我会就我们将来的工作寻求知道上帝的旨意。{MR926 36.5}[89]
§180 I send these lines to you to give relief, if possible with the assurance that I will seek to know the will of God in reference to our future work.?{MR926 36.5}[89]
§181 《信函》1894年146号第4页,(致W.C.怀特,1894年3月29日)—我们会很高兴见到你,你随时都可以来。我们对我们全家人都感到满意。范妮有一个房间,在麦卡拉弟兄租来的房子里是最好的。它在一个山坡上,环境有益健康。我现在必须止笔了。{MR926 36.6}[90]
§182 Letter 146, 1894, p. 4. (To W. C. White, March 29, 1894)—We shall be glad to see you whenever you feel free to come. We are pleased with our household. Fannie has a room, the best in Brother McCullagh’s hired house. It is on a hillside and surroundings healthful. I must stop now.?{MR926 36.6}[90]
§183 《信函》1894年3号第1-3页,(致可能相关的人,1894年7月19日)—我们还住在维多利亚州普雷斯顿的时候,F.E.贝尔登的来信提出一个请求,要我为《青年导报》提供文章,出版社会为此付给我稿费。我将这个请求告诉了博尔顿姐妹,说我接受这个提议会对她不公正或不仁慈。她回复说:“我做不了比现正做的更多了;但我很感兴趣,你应该为那份期刊写作。你若愿意写那些文章,然后提供给我帮助将它们在打字机上备份,也备份你不得不写的众多信件,我就会做我分内的工作,预备那些文章。……”{MR926 36.7}[91]
§184 Letter 3, 1894, pp. 1-3. (“To Whom It May Concern,” July 19, 1894)—While we were living at Preston, Victoria, a request was made by letter from F. E. Belden that I furnish articles for the Youth’s Instructor, the publishers to pay me for so doing. I told Sr.?Bolton of the request, saying that it would not be just or merciful to her [for me] to accept the proposition. She replied, “I cannot do more than I am now doing; but I have a great interest that you should write for that paper. I will do my part of the work in preparing the articles, if you will write them, and then furnish me help to copy them on the typewriter, and also to copy the numerous letters that you have to write....{MR926 36.7}[91]
§185 约在1893年初的两个月期间,博尔顿姐妹为了她的健康还在塔斯马尼亚的时候,戴维斯姐妹几乎花了她所有的时间为当时正在开会的澳大利亚区会、为总会也为一些个人预备材料。为此我并没有向总会收费。我还在新西兰的时候,曾写信给在墨尔本的博尔顿姐妹,无论何时她有需要,就请人帮助,我会付费。她这么做了,我还是没有记在总会的账上。……在维多利亚开帐篷大会的时候,我聘请了考德威尔弟兄作打字员。博尔顿姐妹继续预备文章,但她在帐篷大会期间还有其它的工作,不能做备份的工作。……{MR926 37.1}[92]
§186 During the two months about the beginning of 1893, while Sr. Bolton was in Tasmania for her health, Sr. Davis spent nearly all her time in preparing matter for the Australian Conference, which was then in session, for the General Conference, and for individuals. For this I made no charge to the Conference. While I was in New Zealand, I wrote to Sr. Bolton at Melbourne to employ help whenever she required it, and I would pay the bill. This she did, and again I made no account to the Conference.... At the time of the camp meeting in Victoria, I employed Bro. Caldwell as typewriter [typist]. Sr. Bolton continued to prepare the articles, but she had other labor placed on her during the camp meeting, and could do no copying....?{MR926 37.1}[92]
§187 为《青年导报》预备文章并没有使博尔顿姐妹额外辛劳,因为我给她提供了帮助,既备份我的信函,也备份给《青年导报》的文章。有段时间我聘请了玛蒂·劳伦斯姐妹,供应她食宿并付给她工资。她的部分工作是为博尔顿姐妹做这份额外的备份工作,这既没有记入博尔顿姐妹的账户也没有记入我的账户。{MR926 37.2}[93]
§188 The preparation of Instructor articles has been no extra tax upon Sr. Bolton, for I have supplied her with help to copy my letters as well as the Instructor articles. For some time I have employed Sr. Mattie Lawrence, boarding her and paying her wages. It is a part of her work to do this extra copying for Sr. Bolton, which does not come into Sr. B’s account or my own.?{MR926 37.2}[93]
§189 《信函》1894年149号第1页,(致W.C.怀特,1894年7月30日)—星期五我探访了范妮。她现在住在麦肯齐弟兄家几乎安定下来的她的房间里。……我想我们可以每天早上省下一夸脱牛奶给麦肯齐弟兄,一品脱给范妮。她对她的房间很满意。{MR926 37.3}[94]
§190 Letter 149, 1894, p. 1. (To W. C. White, July 30, 1894)—Friday I called on Fannie. She is now in her room at Brother McKenzie’s very nearly settled.... I thought we could spare one quart of milk to Brother McKenzie each morning and one pint to Fannie. She is much pleased with her room.?{MR926 37.3}[94]
§191 《信函》1894年152号第2页,(致W.C.怀特,1894年9月20日)—星期日下午我们驾车去了普罗斯佩克特,麦卡拉弟兄说教会都希望我去讲道,所以我就依从了他们的请求。我将讲道稿与这封信一同寄去。范妮将它用普通书写速记下来,几乎记下了全部内容。她和贝尔登弟兄夫妇并你母亲乘车上来了。{MR926 37.4}[95]
§192 Letter 152, 1894, p. 2. (To W. C. White, September 20, 1894)—Sunday afternoon we rode to Prospect and Brother McCullagh said the church all wanted me to give the discourse, so I complied with their request. I send it with this letter. Fannie took it in longhand and got nearly the whole of it. She rode up with Brother and Sister Belden and your mother.?{MR926 37.4}[95]
§193 《信函》1895年118号第3页,(致“孩子们”,1895年1月23日)—我们发现我们不在时,范妮以我们的朋友为家人。她在厨房努力,为我们做了很好的午餐。她认为要是能做一些家务,就会对她有益处,我们外出的时候,艾米丽教了茱莉亚·麦肯齐速记法。{MR926 38.1}[96]
§194 Letter 118, 1895, p. 3. (To “Children,” January 23, 1895)—We found Fannie was, in our absence, making her home with our friends. She was sweating over the stove, cooking us a nice dinner. She has thought if she could do some housework, it would be good for her, and Emily has had her class in teaching shorthand to Julia McKenzie, while we were away.?{MR926 38.1}[96]
§195 《信函》1895年39号第1,10页,(致凯洛格医生,1895年2月3日)—我收到了你的信,你在信中问了一个关于发表新版《基督徒节制》的问题。我的意思和你的意思都是需要一个新版本,既然范妮已经提早为期刊预备了文章,我就要让她立即开始工作,为这个新版本选择材料并进行编排。……你提议要寄给我一份“剪贴”的材料,说明你认为会适合你所提到的那本书的内容。这会让我很高兴,我希望你尽快做。同时,范妮在为期刊提供了文章之后,就会在这方面做点什么。{MR926 38.2}[97]
§196 Letter 39, 1895, pp. 1, 10. (To Dr. Kellogg, February 3, 1895)—I have received your letter in which you asked a question in reference to the publication of a new edition of Christian Temperance. It is my mind as well as yours that another edition is needed, and as Fannie has the papers supplied far ahead, I shall set her to work at once selecting matter and arranging for this new edition.... You proposed to send me a “paste up” of matter to indicate what you would consider appropriate for the book you mentioned. This would please me very much, and I hope you will do it as soon as possible. Meanwhile, after supplying the papers, Fannie will do something in this line.?{MR926 38.2}[97]
§197 《信函》1895年89号第1页,(致W.C.怀特,1895年3月11日)—梅[莱西]渴望在四月第一周或第二周去塔斯马尼亚,并且决定我也要去;但我并不觉得渴望水上旅行,我现在有重要工作,正设法完成《基督生平》。现在中止似乎很严重,范妮不在使情况更糟糕、更严峻。我希望她预备的材料不会完成,因为她很可能会留在库兰邦至少两周,而且会涵盖我们经由墨尔本去塔斯马尼亚之前的整个时期。{MR926 38.3}[98]
§198 Letter 89, 1895, p. 1. (To W. C. White, March 11, 1895.)—May [Lacey] is anxious to go to Tasmania the first or second week in April, and is determined that I shall go; but I do not feel very anxious for the water trip, and I am now in important work trying to?complete the Life of Christ. To break up now seems severe, and Fannie being away makes it still worse and more forbidding. The matter that I would have her prepare will not be done, as she will probably remain at least two weeks in Cooranbong, and that will cover nearly the whole period before we leave for Tasmania, going via Melbourne.?{MR926 38.3}[98]
§199 《信函》1895年92b号第1页,(致“孩子们,”1895年4月11日)—我已考虑了你们关于简化《基督的苦难》那本小册子的语言的建议。我将你们的信读给范妮·博尔顿听了,她会把握这项简化语言的工作。……{MR926 39.1}[99]
§200 Letter 92b, 1895, p. 1. (To “Children,” April 11, 1895)—I have considered your suggestions in regard to simplifying the language of the tract, “Sufferings of Christ.” I read your letter to Fannie Bolton, and she will take hold of the work to simplify the language....?{MR926 39.1}[99]
§201 我今天经由墨尔本去塔斯马尼亚。我希望我不在的四周范妮会从事简化《基督的苦难》的工作。{MR926 39.2}[100]
§202 I leave for Tasmania today by way of Melbourne. I hope that during my absence of four weeks Fannie will engage in the work of simplifying the “Sufferings of Christ.”?{MR926 39.2}[100]
§203 《信函》1895年44号第1页,(致J.H.凯洛格,1895年8月29日)—博尔顿小姐能够做的时候就纠正文稿,但她头痛得厉害,往往不能用脑。这已经变得越来越显著了,而且成了我工作中的一个非常大的阻碍。我不能做我愿意做的事。从事写作够累人的了,然而当我写完后,还有预备材料的重担。要是我有一个人编辑材料,我就会感激不尽了。{MR926 39.3}[101]
§204 Letter 44, 1895, p. 1. (To J. H. Kellogg, August 29, 1895)—Sister Bolton corrects manuscripts when she is able, but she is troubled so much with headache that often she cannot use her brain. This has become more and more marked, and is a very great hindrance to me in my work. I cannot do the things I would do. It is sufficiently taxing to do the writing, but when I have done that there is the burden of having the matter prepared. If I had one to edit the matter, I should feel so grateful.?{MR926 39.3}[101]
§205 《信函》1895年17号第3-6页,(致考德威尔弟兄,1895年9月6日)—今天早上我从学校那边过来,看到你的马拴在范妮·博尔顿帐篷前的一棵树上。过了一会儿,我朝那座帐篷走去。杰西·伊斯雷尔和另一位来自纽卡斯尔的女士来看范妮。你正坐在范妮的帐篷里用打字机打字。你为什么不立刻带上打字机到吃饭的帐篷里去呢?你这样的行为会给那些来校参观的年轻女子留下什么印象呢?决不会留下好印象。{MR926 40.1}[102]
§206 Letter 17, 1895, pp. 1, 3-6. (To Bro. Caldwell, September 6, 1895)—This morning, as I came from the school ground, I saw your horse fastened to a tree before the tent occupied by Fannie Bolton. After a while I went to the tent. A lady from New Castle and Jessie Israel were visiting Fannie. You were sitting down, writing on the typewriter. Why did you not take the typewriter at once into the dining tent? What impression can such a course make upon the mind of the young girl visiting at the school? It made an impression that was anything but favorable.?{MR926 40.1}[102]
§207 你随便待年轻女子是不合适的,你却觉得这很正常,没什么大不了的。上帝的圣言吩咐你,各样的恶事要禁戒不做,但你是这样的吗?你已成家,一妻二子,你把他们留在了美国,无需更多激励,这一事实就应足以使你在与他人交往过程中培养自守和谨慎。……我写这些事给你,是因为你正在欺骗范妮,她显然完全处于盲目和迷恋之中。……{MR926 40.2}[103]
§208 Your freedom with young women is improper, but it is so natural and common to you that you think nothing of it. The word of God has told you that you are to abstain from the very appearance of evil; but do you? You are a married man, with a wife and two boys, whom you have left in America, and this fact should be sufficient, without further prompting, to lead you to cultivate sobriety and carefulness in your association with others.... I write these things to you because you are deceiving Fannie, and she is apparently totally blind and infatuated....?{MR926 40.2}[103]
§209 你在墨尔本时就常现身范妮周围,不仅有邪恶的样子,而且本身就是邪恶的。你对这事乐此不疲,但你本应觉察出自己的行为正怂恿别人走上同一条恶道。{MR926 40.3}[104]
§210 Placing yourself in the society of Fannie as much as you did while at Melbourne had not only the appearance of evil, but was evil. You enjoyed it, but you should have had discernment to understand that by your course of action you were encouraging others in the same path.?{MR926 40.3}[104]
§211 我现在要去塔斯马尼亚州,你和范妮要留在埃文代尔。我走之后,你会觉得和她交往更加自由,因为没有我在场监督。我担心你会因自己的亲密行为而羞辱真理。我决不容许此事发生。离范妮的帐篷远点,否则丑闻不可避免。……{MR926 40.4}[105]
§212 I am now going to Tasmania, and you and Fannie will remain at Avondale. After my absence, you will feel inclined to associate together more freely, because I am not present to hold the fort. I fear you will dishonor the truth by your familiarity. I decidedly protest against this. Keep yourself out of Fannie’s tent, or else a scandal will be created....?{MR926 40.4}[105]
§213 当你表示你渴望范妮将她的东西搬到我的帐篷并成为我家庭的一员时,我就知道你并不知道你在说什么。这种想法是前后矛盾的;但我感到我必须保持安静,否则我会很激烈地发言。于是你就明说你希望范妮帮助烹饪,“为了你的胃,”因为你喜欢她的烹饪,享受她所预备的食物。我对自己说:“可怜、愚昧、自私的男人。”你证明了曾清楚地摆在我面前的事,——你是自私的,会不择手段达到你的目的。{MR926 40.5}[106]
§214 When you expressed your desire for Fannie to move her things into my tent and become a member of my family, I knew that you did not know what you were talking about. The idea was inconsistent; but I felt that I must keep quiet, or I would speak very strongly. Then you stated plainly that you wanted Fannie to help in the cooking, “for your stomach’s sake,” because you liked her cooking, and enjoyed the food she prepared. I said to myself, “Poor, foolish, selfish man.” You demonstrated what had been laid before me in clear lines,---that you were selfish, and would work in any way to accomplish your ends.?{MR926 40.5}[106]
§215 《信函》1896年19号第1,4,5页,(致W.F.考德威尔,约于1895年9月,1896年6月11日寄出)—数月以来,我从范妮那里得到的帮助极少,不是因为她不能工作,而是因为她与你的交往使她有了一种经验,以致不适合在我的工作中做任何事。……{MR926 40.6}[107]
§216 Letter 19, 1896, pp. 1, 4, 5. (To W. F Caldwell, c. September, 1895, sent June 11, 1896.)—I have had very little help from Fannie for many months, not because she cannot work, but her association with you has caused her to have an experience which has unfitted her to do anything in my work....?{MR926 40.6}[107]
§217 我对另一件事深有感触,就是你到范妮的帐篷去找她。我已决定你们二人不可在一起工作。你已结婚,是两个孩子的父亲。即便你和你妻子离婚,从圣经上来看,你也无权另娶。……{MR926 40.7}[108]
§218 I feel deeply over another matter, and that is your visiting Fannie in her tent. I have already decided that you two cannot work together. You are a married man, father of two children. If your?wife has obtained a divorce from you that does not leave you free to marry again, as I read my Bible....?{MR926 40.7}[108]
§219 我走之前必须立下一些规矩。考德威尔不需要去范妮的帐篷。范妮不在工作状态已有一段时间。她和你的交往是这事的主要原因。我对此心知肚明,因此我说:远离范妮的帐篷。我走之后,你会觉得良机已至,想什么时候去找她就什么时候去;我若不警告你并责令你管好自己就不能走。我不想因你轻率卤莽的习惯或行为给我和这个团体带来耻辱。{MR926 41.1}[109]
§220 Before leaving I must lay down some rules. There is no call for Caldwell to visit Fannie’s tent. Fannie has not been in working order for some time. Her association with you is largely the cause of this. I know this to be so, and therefore I say, keep away from her tent. When I am away you will feel that you have a fine opportunity to get into her society whenever you can; and I cannot go without warning you and charging you to keep yourself to yourself. I want no reproach brought upon me nor upon this community, by imprudent, careless habits or practices.?{MR926 41.1}[109]
§221 《信函》1895年41号第4,6页,(致凯洛格弟兄,1895年10月25日)—我很遗憾没有更多文字上的帮助。我很需要这种帮助。范妮若是不为报刊预备那么多文章,也没有那么多信函和证言要编辑以满足对我信件的需求和人们的需要,是可以在著书的工作上多多帮助我的。……有人恳切地写信给我,请我为《青年导报》投稿;但我看不出我怎么能接受这个额外的负担。我有大量的信函和证言得为不同的个人预备,为期刊提供文章又是必要的,有更多的工作要做成,过于一个人所能完成的,因为编辑和备份材料的所有重担都加在一个工人身上了。我决定必需再雇一个人为范妮·博尔顿打字,从而分配工作。我雇了玛蒂·劳伦斯从事这项工作,她花上自己大约一半的时间与博尔顿姐妹一起工作。{MR926 41.2}[110]
§222 Letter 41, 1895, pp. 4, 6. (To Bro. Kellogg, October 25, 1895)—I am sorry that I have not more literary help. I need this kind of help very much. Fannie could help me a great deal on the book work if she had not so many articles to prepare for the papers, and so many letters and testimonies to edit to meet the demands of my correspondence, and the needs of the people.... Earnest letters were written me requesting me to write for the Youth’s Instructor; but I could not see how I could take this additional burden. I had numerous letters and testimonies that had to be prepared for various individuals, and it was necessary that the papers should be supplied with articles, and there was more work to be done than could be carried through by one person when all the burden of both editing and copying the matter was laid upon one worker. I concluded that it would be necessary to hire somebody to run the typewriter for Fannie Bolton, and so distribute the work. I hired Mattie Lawrence for this work, and she put in about half of her time in working with Sister Bolton.?{MR926 41.2}[110]
§223 《信函》1895年102号,全信,(致玛丽安·戴维斯,1895年10月29日)—我给你写一封短信,告诉你一些我必须公开在你面前的事。还在库兰邦的时候,我曾在一个异象中看到范妮在跟不同的人谈话,与两年前我们不得不对付的那种压力一样。我在三个不同的时间被带进一个房间,那里似乎全是黑暗的,像一个地窖。我看不见那些在场之人的脸,但却听到了她的声音。她在以一种极其兴奋的方式说她曾在墨尔本说过的事,说她的才干没有得到承认,说她将自己的命都投入到了工作中,可是她却被撇在一边如同不存在,而怀姐妹却得到了出版材料的所有荣誉。她说的那么恳切热心,以致她的话会被任何一个不知道在她参与我和我的工作之前我的著作是什么样子的人信以为真。{MR926 41.3}[111]
§224 Letter 102, 1895, entire letter. (To Marian Davis, October 29, 1895)—I write you a short letter to tell you some things that I must open before you. While in Cooranbong, I had a presentation of Fannie talking to different ones, exactly in the same strain as that we had to deal with two years ago. At three different times I was brought into a room where all seemed dark as a cellar. I could not see the faces of those present, but heard her voice. She was in a most excited manner saying the very same things she said in Melbourne, stating that her talent was not acknowledged, that she brought her very being and life into the work, and?yet she was set aside as a nonentity, while Sister White got all the credit of the matter published. She was so very earnest and enthused that her statements would be taken as truth by any one who did not know what my writings were before she had any connection with me and my work.?{MR926 41.3}[111]
§225 这事再一次显在我面前,就如我已在墨尔本发生的事上告诉你和她的。她要求将她的话放进我的文稿里,并称这些话为“美丽的词语,”然而,范妮·博尔顿说,它们是她自己的话。然后她便流利地谈论,说她已撇下一切,并将她的生命奉献了,好从事我的工作。她极其恳切流利地讲了许多这种话,人人似乎都将她的话信以为真了。{MR926 42.1}[112]
§226 Again the matter was presented to me as I have told you and her in the matter that came up at Melbourne. She claimed to put her words in my manuscript, and these were called “beautiful words,” but, said Fannie Bolton, they were her own words. Then she talked fluently, saying that she had left everything and had given her life to be engaged in my work. Many statements after this order were presented in most earnest fluency and all seemed to receive her words as truth.?{MR926 42.1}[112]
§227 我从库兰邦回到格兰维尔之后,一些事又显在我面前,有警告赐下,说我前面有一场考验。我蒙指示在那些与我联络的人中间,有一股欺骗性影响的暗流在涌动,若不清除所有这种影响,就会对真理的事业造成大害。我告诉你,玛丽安,我深感负担。我知道范妮的兴趣不在工作上。我与她没有和谐。我已感到,当我将著作放在她手中去备份时,有某种能力在她与我之间,印象是“别给她,别给她。”我不能解释我的印象,也不能解释所呈现给我为要教导我的比喻。{MR926 42.2}[113]
§228 Again, after I returned to Granville from Cooranbong, matters were presented before me, and warnings were given that a trial was before me. I was instructed that among those connected with me, there was working an undercurrent of deceptive influences and that unless there was a cleansing away of all such influences, great harm would result to the cause of truth. I told you, Marian, that I was deeply burdened. I knew that Fannie’s interest was not in the work. I had no harmony with her. I have felt, when I put writings in her hand to be copied, that there was some power between her and me, and the impression was “Withhold, withhold.” I could not interpret my impressions nor the figures presented to me to teach me.?{MR926 42.2}[113]
§229 是她自己提议要来墨尔本阿马代尔的,她自己创造了条件。我问她,参加帐篷大会对她来说是否安全,因为她若被敦促去接管儿童聚会,她就会倾向于这么做,然后她对我就会毫无用处,因为她会不得不将全部时间用于那项工作。她说:“我不能接管儿童聚会。那对我来说太难了,会用掉我每一点力量。我会想要参加一些晚上的聚会,偶尔参加白天的,但我会准备好在你的工作中帮助你。”{MR926 42.3}[114]
§230 It was her own proposition to come to Armadale, Melbourne, and she made the conditions herself. I asked her if it was safe for her to attend the camp meeting, for if she should be urged to take the children’s meetings, she would be inclined to do this, and then she would be of no use to me, for she would have to give her whole time to that work. She said, “I could not take the children’s meetings. It is too hard for me. It just takes every bit of power in me. I shall want to attend some meetings in the evenings, occasionally in the day time, but I will be ready to help you in your work.”?{MR926 42.3}[114]
§231 然而我们一到营地,就不容易找到人接管儿童部,于是就力劝范妮从事这项工作。我说:“不可以这样。我有工作给范妮做。”但她很渴望参加儿童聚会,并去指教他们。我有两篇文章要为邮件预备,范妮星期三和星期四读了。为邮件预备了十四页,她在这次聚会期间就没有再做成什么了。{MR926 42.4}[115]
§232 But as soon as we were on the ground, it was not easy to get persons to take the children’s division, and now comes in the great urging for Fannie to engage in this work. I said, “No, it must not be. I have work for Fannie.” But she greatly desired to attend children’s meetings, and to instruct them. I had two articles to be prepared for the mail, and Fannie read Wednesday and Thursday. Fourteen pages were prepared for the mail, and nothing more has been done by her during this meeting.?{MR926 42.4}[115]
§233 我在收到所提到的警告之后,曾问撒拉,范妮是否对她说过什么关于我和我的工作以及她参与我的工作的事。她回避了这个问题,说要是我能同意,范妮就想要接管儿童聚会。我说:“就这些吗?撒拉。”她回答说:“不,我不想告诉你她所说的。”我回答说:“我相信我有责任知道,因为我蒙警告范妮是我的敌人,而且她会歪曲事实,不实地讲述她所从事的工作,会使人们以错误的眼光看待我。”{MR926 42.5}[116]
§234 After I had received the warnings I have mentioned, I asked Sara if Fannie had said anything to her in regard to me and my work and her work in connection with me. She evaded the question and said that Fannie wanted to take the children’s meetings, if I would give my consent. I said, “Is this all, Sara?” She answered, “No, and I do not want to tell you what she said.” I replied, “I believe it is my duty to know, for I am warned that Fannie is my adversary, and that she will misrepresent facts regarding her service in the work which will place me in a wrong light before the people.”?{MR926 42.5}[116]
§235 于是她才告诉了我范妮与她交谈的大意。范妮提到《回声》期刊上的通知,普雷斯科特教授曾编辑了一本论《基督徒教育》的书,这里出现了他的名字,她说:“我自己和可怜小玛丽安被忽视了,从视线中消失了。”她讲得很激烈,述说她所做的大量工作,并且表示悲哀,因为,尽管倚靠她的才干为印刷预备了副本,她的帮助却没有得到承认。她说:“你读读那个通知,撒拉。”然后她举起手,重击桌子上的期刊,激烈地说:“这是一个谎言!一个谎言!一个谎言!”{MR926 42.6}[117]
§236 She then told me the tenor of the conversation that she had with her. She referred to the notice in the paper, the Echo that Professor Prescott had compiled a book on Christian Education, and here his name appears, and, she said, “Myself and poor little Marian are unnoticed, set down out of sight.” She talked very strongly, making statements of the magnitude of the work she had done, and mourned because, although her talent was?depended upon to prepare copy for the printer, her help was not acknowledged. She said, “You read the notice, Sara.” She then raised her hand, pounded it on the paper on the table, and said with vehemence, “It is a lie! a lie! a lie!”?{MR926 42.6}[117]
§237 我派人去请普雷斯科特弟兄,告诉他我确信范妮在极其明显地按照她曾在美国的路线行事,将她对她带进那里工作中之才干的看法告诉别人,因此我曾叫她离开我的工作。我告诉了他两年前我在墨尔本布莱顿帐篷大会上的痛苦经历,与我曾在加利福尼亚的经历相似,那几乎要了我的命。我说:“现在,她正开始从她两年前离开的地方重蹈覆辙。”{MR926 43.1}[118]
§238 I sent for Brother Prescott, and told him I was sure that Fannie was working most decidedly in the same lines that she had worked in America, pouring into other minds her version of things regarding her talents brought into the work there, because of which I had released her then from my services. I told him of the painful experience I had passed through in Melbourne at the Brighton camp meeting two years ago, similar to what I passed through in California at one time, that had nearly cost me my life. “Now,” I said, “She is taking the work up just where she left it two years ago.”?{MR926 43.1}[118]
§239 我说:“你对这种精神和这种正在影响全营的谈话怎么看呢?”他说:“我知道这完全像你在美国曾说过的一样。她在库兰邦曾来找我的妻子和我,将之完全摆开在我们面前。”然后他讲了他是怎么对付这事的。{MR926 43.2}[119]
§240 I said, “What is your opinion of this spirit, and this talk that is leavening the camp?” “O,” said he, “I knew all this just as you have told it, in America. She came to my wife and me and laid it all open before us again in Cooranbong.” Then he told how he met the matter.?{MR926 43.2}[119]
§241 后来我派人去请普雷斯科特姐妹并与她谈了话。她曾告诉范妮这一切都是撒但的作为,他要控制她的意念,以便藉着她,能伤怀姐妹的心。此后我将普雷斯科特弟兄和姐妹叫到一起,商量应该怎么办。{MR926 43.3}[120]
§242 Afterward I sent for Sister Prescott and talked with her. She had told Fannie that all this was the work of Satan to control her mind, that he, through her, could cut the heart of Sister White. After this I called both Brother and Sister Prescott together and consulted as to what should be done.?{MR926 43.3}[120]
§243 星期一,我在聚会之后与范妮谈了话,她很渴望我会同意她接管儿童聚会。{MR926 43.4}[121]
§244 Monday, I spoke with Fannie after meeting and she was very desirous that I would consent for her to take the children’s meeting.?{MR926 43.4}[121]
§245 我说:“范妮,不要在这个营地为他人从事任何一种工作,而要为你自己,直到你的心得以改变,你有了新心,新的意念。如果在这个营地有什么人需要如同用点着的明灯探查自己的心,那就是你了。我不要你在这个营地为我再做一点工作,或者今后永远不会了。就你所参与的我的工作而言,我消除所有反对意见。”她很不舒服地上床睡觉去了,昨天一晚都不舒服。{MR926 43.5}[122]
§246 I said, “Fannie, do not engage in any kind of work for others on this ground but yourself, until your heart is changed and you have a new heart, a new mind. If anyone on this ground needs to search as with a lighted candle his own heart, it is you. I do not ask you to do another stroke of work for me on this ground or ever hereafter. I remove all objections as far as my work in connection with you is concerned.” She went to bed sick, and was sick all last night.?{MR926 43.5}[122]
§247 我尽力查出她曾与之谈话的其他人。我从我们一位传道的弟兄得知,还在学校的时候,她曾向马尔科姆弟兄和姐妹公开她的抱怨,他们那时在真理上还是初信的人。她向他们提出这事的方式使他们以为范妮和玛丽安受到了不公正的待遇。他们对我和我的工作一无所知,范妮表示她和玛丽安已将全部才干与敏锐带入我的书中,可是你们二人却都被忽视不顾,全部荣誉都给了我。{MR926 43.6}[123]
§248 I have endeavored to find out other parties with whom she had talked. From one of our ministering brethren, I learned that while at the school she opened her grievances to Brother and Sister Malcolm, who were then new in the truth. She presented the matter to them in such a way that they thought injustice had been done to Fannie and Marian. They knew nothing of me and my work, and Fannie represented that she and Marian had brought all the talent and sharpness into my books, yet you were both ignored and set aside, and all the credit came to me.?{MR926 43.6}[123]
§249 她曾在《基督化的教育》一书中划出一些词句,称它们为“美好的词句,”还说是她把这些话放进去的,它们是它的。如果这是真的,我请问,谁告诉她要把她的话放进我的著作中的?她自己的言论若是正确的,她就已经对我不忠了。{MR926 43.7}[124]
§250 She had underscored some words in a book, “Christian Education,” “beautiful words,” she called them, and said that she had put in those words, they were hers. If this were the truth, I ask, Who told her to put in her words in my writings? She has, if her own statement is correct, been unfaithful to me.?{MR926 43.7}[124]
§251 然而,普雷斯科特姐妹说,上帝的美意安排那篇文章到了他们(普雷斯科特夫妇)手中,是还没有抄写的原稿,是我的自己的手稿,而这些词句就在那封信中。所以范妮关于这些词句的言论被证明是不真实的。{MR926 43.8}[125]
§252 Sister Prescott however says that, in the providence of God that very article came to them (Brother and Sister Prescott) uncopied and in my own handwriting, and that these very words were in that letter. So Fannie’s statement regarding these words is proved to be untrue.?{MR926 43.8}[125]
§253 星期一,范妮问我能不能和她一起祷告。我告诉她:“可以。”然而当我回到家时,我太虚弱了。我不能跟她谈话或和她一起祷告。要是我能忍得住,就不会再跟她讲话了。她能流利地谈话,不缺乏词汇,我说一句她能说六句。她不可再与我有一点关系了。要是我两年前仅仅实行了我的确信,我原会尽了我的本分。{MR926 43.9}[126]
§254 Monday, Fannie asked if I could pray with her. I told her, “Yes.” But when I came home, I was too feeble. I could not talk with her or pray with her. I shall not talk with her again if I can help it. She can talk fluently, has no lack of words, can talk six words to my one. She must no longer have the slightest connection with me. If I had only carried out my convictions two years ago, I should have done my duty.?{MR926 43.9}[126]
§255 我写给你这个,以便你知道我不会从她那极好的才干中取一点东西,连一根鞋带也不要。她现在可以照她所选择的运用那种才干,涌进她认为自己可以占据的大地方。我对她作为基督徒的现状没有一点信心。她已证明自己是一个叛徒。如果不是你因着你的同情努力使她与我在一起,我本应该此前就与她断绝一切关系。她已经对我造成了多少伤害和将来会造成多少伤害,惟有上帝才知道。{MR926 44.1}[127]
§256 I write you this, that you may know that I will not take so much as a shoe string from her wonderful talent. She may now exercise that talent as she chooses, and swell into the large place she thinks she could occupy. I have not a particle of confidence in her present position as a Christian. She has proved herself a traitor. If you had not tried so hard to keep her with me, through your sympathy, I should have severed all connection with her before this. How much harm she has done me and may do me in the future God alone knows.?{MR926 44.1}[127]
§257 这次聚会之后如果范妮要来格兰维尔,你切不可把我所写的任何东西放在她手中,也不要给她读《基督生平》。我不愿得到来自她的任何(建议)。我与范妮断开,因为上帝要求这么做,而我自己的心也要求这么做。我为范妮感到难过,虽然如此,这是事实。那么要是上帝愿意帮助我,我就要赞美祂的圣名。{MR926 44.2}[128]
§258 If after this meeting Fannie shall come to Granville, you must not put one line of anything I have written into her hands, or read a line to her of the Life of Christ. I would not have any [advice] from her. I am disconnected from Fannie because God requires it, and my own heart requires it. I am sorry for Fannie, but nevertheless it is truth. If God will help me then, I will praise His holy name.?{MR926 44.2}[128]
§259 我不想受进一步的欺骗。我确信主正在扶持我,加给我力量。我今天早上感到主已将这件事从我手中拿走,别人现在必须处理这事。随着事情水落石出,范妮现在有了两年前她在墨尔本的感受,但她那时的悔改太短命了。{MR926 44.3}[129]
§260 I want no further deceptions. I am sure that the Lord is holding me up and strengthening me. I felt this morning that the Lord had taken this matter out of my hands, and others must now handle it. Fannie now feels, as the matter has come out, about as she felt at Melbourne two years ago, but her repentance then was short-lived.?{MR926 44.3}[129]
§261 她现在告诉别人她感觉很糟糕,希望我饶恕。这是我能做的,但我决不能再让她与我联络了。{MR926 44.4}[130]
§262 She now tells others she feels very badly and wants me to forgive. This I can do, but can never connect her with me again.?{MR926 44.4}[130]
§263 她有时变得实在被鬼所附,像基督时代的人一样。而当这些发作临到她时,许多人竟以为她是上帝默示的。她讲话流利,言辞密集,接连不断,她是在鬼魔的控制之下。于是她就声称她已做了我已告诉她决不要在我的工作中做的事,用她的话代替我的话。这真是够糟糕的了。然而当她采取立场说她制作了我的书、我的文章和其中的优美语言时,显然撒但能藉着她对我造成任何数量的伤害。她能比任何一个人都更多地灌输疑惑和撒播恶种。她对我来说是一个危险的助手。她决不会再有机会将范妮·博尔顿的惊人才干与我的工作混在一起了。{MR926 44.5}[131]
§264 She becomes at times as verily possessed by demons as were human beings in the days of Christ. And when these paroxysms are upon her, many think she is inspired of God. She is fluent, her words come thick and fast, and she is under the control of demons. Then she claims that she has done the very things in my service I have told her in no case to do, that she has substituted her words for my words. This is bad enough. But when she takes the position that she has made my books, my articles and is responsible for the beautiful language, it is evident that Satan can through her do me any amount of harm. She can do more to implant doubts and sow seeds of evil than any person I know. She is a dangerous helper to me. She shall never have a chance again of mingling Fannie Bolton’s wonderful talent with my work.?{MR926 44.5}[131]
§265 她本来与我的工作毫无关系,直到明尼阿波利斯会议之后,可是主却保守和帮助了我,直到那时。她去了安阿伯之后,曾为我做了一点事。她要了我的一些文章带到安阿伯去,说她喜爱这工作。但我现在认为她渴望以被我雇用为借口,以便获得别人的信任,因为我委托她作我的代表为我的书籍预备副本。{MR926 44.6}[132]
§266 She had nothing to do with my work until after the meeting at Minneapolis, yet the Lord had kept and helped me up to that time. After she went to Ann Arbor she did a little for me. She asked for some articles of mine to take with her to Ann Arbor, saying she loved the work. But I now think that she wished to use the pretext that she was employed by me in order to gain the confidence of others because I trusted her as my agent to prepare copy for my books.?{MR926 44.6}[132]
§267 我现在看到了我的愚昧。自从她与我一起来到澳大利亚,我与她在一起一直没有真正的平安和快乐。我与她在一起感觉不到平安、安慰和友谊,可是我却设法留住她。{MR926 44.7}[133]
§268 I see my folly now. I have not, since she came with me to Australia, had real peace and happiness with her. I have felt no peace, comfort and companionship with her, and yet I have tried to hold on to her.?{MR926 44.7}[133]
§269 《信函》1895年9号,全信,(致范妮·博尔顿,1895年11月7日)—昨天晚上我的睡眠使我不安。我在我的睡眠时间与你交流。我一直在等着,希望有什么话会赐给我,会更加清晰地规划出主的道路,以便我知道怎么做。但我却没有得到额外的亮光;因此我必须听从我过去不时得到的亮光。我不会用笔描绘在过去的历史中已经发生的许多事。那只会使我将它们重温一遍。我只说在这个营地发生的事并不是一个突然的试探,对人来说又新又奇的事,而是一种一直怀有的思路,而且会继续怀有。它可能会受到抑制,但我不能以为它已经死了,不可能复活。{MR926 46.1}[134]
§270 Letter 9, 1895, entire letter. (To Fannie Bolton, November 7, 1895)—The past night my sleep has troubled me. I am communicating to you in my sleeping hours. I have been waiting, hoping that some word would be given me that would mark out the way of the Lord more distinctly, that I might know what to do. But I have had no additional light; therefore I must take heed to the light I have already had from time to time in the past. I shall not trace with pen the many things that have occurred in the history of the past. It would only make me live them over afresh. I merely state that what has occurred on this camp ground is not a sudden temptation, new and strange to the human agent. It is a line of thought that has been cherished, and that will continue to be cherished. It may be smothered, but I cannot flatter myself that it is dead, without a possibility of a resurrection.?{MR926 46.1}[134]
§271 就在你知道我因身体的疾病而遭受最剧烈痛苦的时候;就在我必需使我全部的能力都处在完全控制之下,我应该有最有利的环境,以便在平安和我们主耶稣基督的恩典中保守我的心的时候,我却在这个重要的场合被带进了几乎不能忍受的困惑痛苦之中。很具有考验性质的障碍被丢在我的道路上,为要使我的手软弱,使我的心丧失所有的勇气,撇下我与不确定性角力;对付你所造成的不信和怀疑的结果。如果确实如你所说的,上帝就会将我撇在一边,用范妮·博尔顿取代我。这些表现一直使我困惑,而且依然使我困惑。我还没有从震惊恢复过来。那些应该帮助我的人应该看到我在身体的软弱中负着一个人能背的最重的担子,可是却不得不因他们的态度而悲伤到无法测度。然而主说他们无力抵挡魔鬼,或摆脱他的网罗。{MR926 47.1}[135]
§272 At the very time when you knew me to be suffering most severely with physical infirmities; at the very time when it was essential that I should have all my powers under full control, and that I should have the most favorable surroundings, to keep my mind in peace, and the grace of our Lord Jesus Christ, on this important occasion I am brought into perplexity and distress which is scarcely endurable. Impediments of a very trying character are thrown in my way to weaken my hands, to take all courage out of my heart, and leave me to wrestle with uncertainties, to meet a harvest of unbelief and suspicion, which you have created. If true, as you have represented, God would set me aside, and take Fannie Bolton in my stead. These manifestations have been bewildering to me, and still are. I do not recover from the shock. Those who are supposed to help me should see me in my physical weakness, carrying the heaviest burdens one can bear, yet compelled to be distressed beyond measure by their attitude. But the Lord says they have no power to resist the devil, or from his snare to go.?{MR926 47.1}[135]
§273 我不会尝试说出我能说的一切,因为我没有体力。我只能轻轻走过,一步一步,一点一点回忆过去的六七年,并且询问:我是干什么的?上帝对我有什么旨意?我仍在困惑的迷宫里。但我看到只有一条路在我面前开放。要是我的生命值得保留,我就必须与范妮断开。而且,我认为这是她惟一的希望。撒但以为他能支使你那富有成效的想象力,使你声称做了上帝不愿让你做的工作——将你自己掺杂在我的著作中。这对我来说是一个大考验,因为我没有挑选一个人预备我的文章。这可能是上帝的天意。也许祂我要放下我的笔,说,我已经写够了,虽然我曾以为我还有许多东西必须写。倚靠一位编辑预备我的文章出版使我的工作很困难,而且我仍处在大考验中。去找一个不熟悉我的生人,会经历我与范妮曾有的同样的经验,上帝禁止这样。但我在这个营地放弃范妮了。要是她愿意将自己的能力奉献给上帝,并将她自己隐藏在基督里面,她就能找到工作。我不会阻止她。{MR926 47.2}[136]
§274 I will not attempt to say all that might be said, for I have not physical strength. I can but go lightly over the ground in memory of the last six or seven years, step by step, from point to point, and inquire, What am I? and what will God have of me? I am still in a maze of perplexity. But I see only one course open before me. If my life is worth saving, I must disconnect from Fannie. And this is, I think, her only hope. Satan has supposed he could work upon your fruitful imagination to claim you have done a work God would not let you do—blend yourself with my writings. It is a great trial for me to do this, for I have no one selected to prepare my articles. This may be in the providence of God. Perhaps He designs me to lay down my pen, and say, I have written enough, while I had thought I had many things I must write. Being dependent upon an editor to prepare my articles for the press makes my work difficult, and I am still in great trial. To get a stranger who is unacquainted with me, would be to go through the same experience that I have had with Fannie, God forbid. But I give Fannie up on this camp-ground. If she will consecrate her abilities to God, and hide herself in Christ, she can find work. I will not hinder her.?{MR926 47.2}[136]
§275 尽管范妮在这方面再次加给我那一切的困难,我的笔却一点没有向在美国的任何一个人传达这些事态,除了爱德森——我曾向他简要地提到过这事。然而现在要不得不说点什么了。有必要清楚地说明事实。这是总会应得的,他们迄今为她以为她来与我同工时要做的工作支付了她的工资。我会设法避免提到任何细节。{MR926 47.3}[137]
§276 Notwithstanding all the repeated difficulties that Fannie has placed upon me in this line, not a trace of my pen has been communicated in regard to the state of affairs to any one in America, with exception of Edson—I made a brief mention of it. But something will have to be said now. A plain statement of facts will be necessary. This is due the conference, who have hitherto paid her for the work she was supposed to do when she came with me. I shall try to avoid making any reference to particulars.?{MR926 47.3}[137]
§277 主给范妮的警告是她不喜欢考虑的,她也没有听从。放在她手中的宝贵材料,她没有视为又宝贵又神圣的;她没有这样待它们并珍爱所赐的亮光。她没有因它们而得到知识,也没有实行不断摆在她面前的原则。她虽熟悉我感到必须写的最严肃的信息,却滋生了轻蔑。它们在她看来成了俗的。因此,为她灵魂的缘故,也为了保存我的生命,我必须断绝与范妮·博尔顿的所有关系。{MR926 47.4}[138]
§278 The warnings given to Fannie by the Lord have not been pleasant for her to consider, and she has not taken any heed to them. The precious matter placed in her hands she has not regarded as precious and sacred; she has not treated them as such and cherished the light given. She has not obtained knowledge by them, nor practiced the principles kept constantly before her. Familiarity with the most solemn messages that I have felt I must write, have bred contempt. They have become common to her mind. Therefore, for her soul’s sake, and in order to preserve my life, I must sever all connection with Fannie Bolton.?{MR926 47.4}[138]
§279 我了解她说她有大量工作堆在她面前,是她能做的。如果成圣了,如果圣洁了,如果意念洁净了,心灵净化了,如果心里柔和谦卑了,上帝会赦免以往,并与她的努力同工。然而她若工作为要获得对自己的赞美和荣耀,她就要独自工作。我不敢将我的文稿委托她处理。我若将她的见证信以为真,就会总是不确定文稿会受到怎样的对待。然而这个试探对她来说将始终是一个危险的试探。她若是用上帝赐给她的能力展示范妮·博尔顿所能做的,她就是靠自己工作,在基督外面。我现在不情愿而且心中忧伤地对范妮·博尔顿说:你不再代表我参加总会的工作了。{MR926 47.5}[139]
§280 I understand that she says she has plenty of work piled up before?her which she can do. If sanctified, if holy, if cleansed in mind and purified in soul, if meek and lowly in heart, God will forgive the past, and work with her efforts. But if she works to obtain praise and glory for herself, she will work alone. I dare not trust her to handle my manuscript. I should ever be in uncertainty as to how it is treated if I take her testimony as truth. But this temptation will always be a dangerous one to her. If she uses her ability, given her of God, to exhibit what Fannie Bolton can do, she works in herself, and out of Christ. I now reluctantly and with grief in my heart say to Fannie Bolton: You are no longer in the employment of the General Conference in my behalf.?{MR926 47.5}[139]
§281 范妮,我饶恕你给我带来的痛苦和苦难,这已经重演那么多次了。我饶恕是因为我希望得到饶恕。可是尽管我饶恕,我也必须按照主以往就上帝所赐给我的工作和你参与我的工作所赐的亮光和警告行事。你无法看出主所赐给我去做的工作的性质,否则你原不会视它为一件稀松平常的事。你的灵魂在上帝眼中看为宝贵。藉着天天从你自己的道路回转,藉着像小孩子一样接受上帝的道路,你会发现你进天国的惟一指望。你一直受到称赞和高举;你一直因具有很大的虔诚和无私的献身而得到荣誉。这是一个错误。你本性的情绪化部分已被调集起来为你自己的益处和那些与你结交之人的益处而总的来说运用得太多了。在你强烈的情感中,你的情绪化已兴奋到高度紧张。在你为青少年举行的聚会中,主上帝并没有赐福你的努力。你做许多事,却没有因此得到稳固、认真、持久的结果。自我与每件事都混杂在一起,污染和败坏了你的服务。使用上帝亲自点燃的圣火总是安全的,别的火不行。我请你阅读《民数记》第十六章。我若是靠自我工作的,我的工作就会站立不住;我若是靠上帝工作的,工作就会持久。{MR926 48.1}[140]
§282 Fannie, I forgive you for the pain and suffering you have caused me, and which has been so many times repeated. I forgive as I hope to be forgiven. Yet notwithstanding I forgive, I must do according to the light and warnings given me in the past in reference to the work God has given me, and in reference to your work in connection with me. You cannot discern the character of the work the Lord has given me to do, else you would not regard it as a common thing. Your soul is precious in the sight of God. By being converted daily from your own way, by accepting God’s way as a little child, you will find your only hope of heaven. You have been praised and exalted; you have been given credit for possessing great piety and disinterested devotion. This is a mistake. The emotional part of your nature has been called to exercise altogether too much for your own good and for the good of those with whom you associate. It has been keyed up to a high tension in your intensity of feelings. In your meetings held for the youth, the Lord God has not blessed your efforts. You do many things for which there is not found solid, earnest, abiding results. Self was mingled with everything, tainting and corrupting your service. It is always safe to use the holy fire of God’s own kindling, and no other. I ask you to read the 16th chapter of Numbers. If I have worked in self, my work will not stand; if I have worked in God, the work will endure.?{MR926 48.1}[140]
§283 [注:]范妮必须原谅我不与她进行私人会谈。我受不了那个。要在普雷斯科特弟兄和姐妹、科利斯弟兄和姐妹、科尔科德弟兄和姐妹、卢梭弟兄和姐妹面前宣读这封信。在宣读的时候范妮应该在场。{MR926 48.2}[141]
§284 [Note:] Fannie must excuse me from having a private interview with her. I cannot bear it. Let this be read before Bro. and Sr. Prescott, Bro. and Sr. Corliss, Bro. and Sr. Colcord, and Bro. and Sr. Rousseau. Fannie should be present when it is read.?{MR926 48.2}[141]
§285 《信函》1895年9a号,全信,(致范妮·博尔顿,1895年11月11日)—我仔细考虑了你再次参与我工作的事。我不能同意这样。关于你自己的事一直在自行成形,你完全不可能继续从事你曾为我做的工作。分离必须来到,原因我已经告诉你了。我必须利用我力所能及的所有手段,断绝你就我和我的工作发表你的声明的每一个机会,——你竟声称将你的才干放进了我的工作中。{MR926 48.3}[142]
§286 Letter 9a, 1895, entire letter. (To Fannie Bolton, November 11, 1895)—I have considered the matter carefully in regard to your connecting with me again in the work. I cannot consent to it. The matter has been shaping itself in reference to yourself, that it is simply impossible for you to continue to do the work for me that you have done. Separation must come, for the reasons I have told you. I must use every means in my power, cut off every chance for you to make your statements which you have made in reference to me and my work—your claims to putting your talent in my work.?{MR926 48.3}[142]
§287 你在做工时并不快乐;你的言论在别人心中留下的印象是你对我很糟糕的作品很有负担。我不会试图否认或承认它。你是由总会雇用来帮助我的,那当然意味着你的工作要求工资。但你已感到如此遗憾的工作将不再成为你的一个试探之源了。我真心感到遗憾,我不能将为印刷充分预备的文章放在你手里了。我已提供了一个人为你打字,你则要为印刷预备这些文章。不幸的是,我不能做这部分工作。要是我能做,原不会需要你的服务。然而你现在有自由开始从事不这么单调的工作。你有自由返回美国,或在墨尔本找工作,做任何令你喜悦的事。然而只要想到在这次帐篷大会后再次与你联络就使我感到极其痛苦。至少有一段时间我肯定必须摆脱你。我必须有机会让别的人手而不是你预备我的著作,以便你那有价值的才干不致有一丁点儿混杂在我感到有责任要写的东西里。我必须安排事情,以便你的才干不致被算为我的文章,我出的书不致被认为主要是你的工作。这事必须从我的心灵中拿掉,你也不要受试探以为对你不公,你会出卖我,叛变我,并用你的谎言使我心中烦恼,削弱我的感化力。{MR926 48.4}[143]
§288 You are not happy in doing the work; impressions are left upon the minds of others by your statements that you are much burdened over my very bad writing. I shall not attempt to deny or admit it. You were employed by the conference to help me, and of course that means your doing work that requires wages. But the work over which you have felt so great sorrow shall no longer be a source of temptation to you. I am sincerely sorry that I could not place in your hands articles fully prepared for the press. I have furnished you one to work?the typewriter and you were to prepare these articles for the press. Unfortunately I could not do this part of the work. If I could have done it, your services would not have been required. But now you are free to take up work not so monotonous. You are at liberty to return to America, find work in Melbourne, do anything that pleases you. But the bare thought of connecting with you again after this camp-meeting is most painful to me. For a time at least I positively must be free from you. I must have an opportunity to have my writings prepared by some other hand than yours, that not one jot or tittle of your valuable talent shall be mingled with the things I feel it my duty to write. I must arrange matters so that your talent shall not be counted with my articles and book-making as to be considered as largely your work. This matter must be taken off my soul, and you not be tempted to suppose injustice is done you, and you will betray me, and turn traitor to me, and vex my soul and weaken my influence by your falsehoods.?{MR926 48.4}[143]
§289 我饶恕你在过去和在这次聚会上给我造成的一切痛苦,我渴望自由和向主献上完整纯粹的服务。我很遗憾,实在遗憾我没有成就更好的工作,但你的做法对我来说已经成了一个谜,而且如此不必要,如此残忍,以致使我大大受挫。惟有主才能赐给我胜利和自由。{MR926 49.1}[144]
§290 I forgive all that you have caused me to suffer in the past and at this meeting, where I desire to be free and to do whole service to the Master. I am sorry, truly sorry, that I have not done better work, but your course of action has been such a mystery to me and so uncalled for, and so cruel, that it has been a great discouragement to me. The Lord alone can give me victory and freedom.?{MR926 49.1}[144]
§291 《信函》1895年103号第1,2页,(致玛丽安·戴维斯,1895年11月12日)—我什么都没有交在范妮手里,也决不期待给她另一个机会设法出卖我和变成叛徒。我已有足够的“才干”和“能力”持续我一生。我告诉你她的心不在工作上。她没有与工作融合在一起。她是肤浅的,喜欢兴奋和表现范妮·博尔顿。但她不会再以我的健康和我的生命为代价这么做了。我已坚持留住她两年,太久了。她已在很大程度上使你产生了她有伟大才干的想法,你已接受这种想法,但这对你来说却没有力量。……{MR926 49.2}[145]
§292 Letter 103, 1895, pp. 1, 2. (To Marian Davis, November 12, 1895)—I have given nothing into Fannie’s hands, and never expect to give her another chance to seek to betray me and turn traitor. I have had enough of “talent” and “ability” to last me a life time. I told you her heart was not in the work. She does not blend with the work. She is superficial, given to excitement and to exhibiting Fannie Bolton. But she will do this no longer at the expense of my health and my life. I have held on to her two years too long. She has to a large degree inspired you with ideas of her great talent, and you have received it, but it has been no strength to you....?{MR926 49.2}[145]
§293 可怜的范妮没有自知之明。我已与她交谈过,告诉她我必须知道她在她得去做的工作中抱怨了什么。她必须告诉我这一切不满的真实原因,但她所能说的一切就是有时我留下句子不完全。我提醒她,我在写作时常常被打断,有时句子正写到一半,而当我重新开始工作时,我会继续前行,没有注意不完整的句子。但我曾告诉她,当这种情况发生时,她可以要么将材料交给我,要么删掉它而继续。我既写作这么多,要是有许多句子未完成,并不是奇怪的事。{MR926 49.3}[146]
§294 Fannie, poor soul, does not know herself. I have talked with her, and told her that I must know of what she complains in the work she has had to do. She must tell me the real cause for all this disaffection, but all she could say was that sometimes I left sentences incomplete. I reminded her, that I was often interrupted in my writing, and sometimes in the middle of a sentence, and that when I resumed the work I would go right on, not noticing the incomplete sentence. But I had told her that when this occurred she might either hand the matter to me or else strike it out and go on. Doing as much writing as I do, it is not surprising if there are many sentences left unfinished.?{MR926 49.3}[146]
§295 我对范妮说:“你对我未完成的著作发出‘辛酸的泪’的哭泣表现不是上帝默示的。当普雷斯科特姐妹敦促你告诉她是什么使你这样哭泣时,你对她讲了你的抱怨,说我的笔迹很糟,你不得不将给你的内容全写一遍,还说你很灰心;因为你确实制作了以我的名义出来的书籍和文章。”{MR926 49.4}[147]
§296 I said to Fannie, “Your exhibitions of weeping ‘bitter tears’ over my imperfect writings are not inspired of God. When Sister Prescott urged you to tell her what caused you to weep so, you communicated to her your grievances, saying that my penmanship was terrible and that you had to write the matter all over that I presented to you, and that you were discouraged; for you really made the books and the articles that came forth in my name.”?{MR926 49.4}[147]
§297 她感到非常羞耻,但她求我再试她一次。我坚决地说:“不。”我寄给你我写给她的一封短信的副本,和一封我曾写给你却没有寄出的信。{MR926 49.5}[148]
§298 She felt very much ashamed, but she begged of me to try her again. I said decidedly, “No.” I send you a copy of a short letter I have written to her, and a letter I wrote to you, but which was not sent.?{MR926 49.5}[148]
§299 《信函》1895年14号,全信,(致范妮·博尔顿,1895年11月23日)—我一直在考虑到你和考德威尔之间的事,我要说的话都已经说尽了。我认为你没有道德上的权利嫁给他,他也没有道德上的权利娶你。考德威尔大大激怒他妻子后离开了她。他离开了曾在上帝面前起誓要在有生之年爱护并珍视的妻子。她还未与他离婚,她还是他合法妻子的时候,他就离开她三年之久,然后从心里离开了她,并对你表达爱意。这事主要是你和一个已婚男人商定的,而这人在法律上还受他结发之妻的约束,她与他生有二子。{MR926 50.1}[149]
§300 Letter 14, 1895, entire letter. (To Fannie Bolton, November 23, 1895)—I have been considering your case in connection with Caldwell, and I have no other counsel to give than I have given. I consider that you have no moral right to marry Caldwell: he has no moral right to marry you. He left his wife after giving her great provocation. He left her whom he had vowed before God to love and cherish while both should live. Before ever she obtained her divorce, when she was his lawful wife, he left her for three years, and then left her in heart, and expressed his love to you. The matter has been negotiated largely between you and a married man, while he was legally bound to the wife he married, who has had two children by him.?{MR926 50.1}[149]
§301 他虽已经和妻子离婚,但我丝毫看不出圣经许可你们缔结婚姻。他激怒妻子主要是因他自己的行为而起,我看不出一点儿亮光支持他有合法的权利与你利益与共。有一件事是确定的。如果你们结婚,我就不能继续和你们一起工作了,因我确定圣经会谴责你们的结合。因此,我希望你们明白,从上帝赐我有关过去和现在的亮光来看,如果你们结合,我就不能继续雇用你们了。{MR926 50.2}[150]
§302 I see not a particle of leniency in the Scriptures given either of you to contract marriage, although his wife is divorced. From the provocation he has given her, it was largely his own course of action that has brought this result, and I cannot see in any more favorable light his having a legal right to link his interest with yours or you to link your interest with his. One thing is settled. I could not connect with either of you if this step is taken; for I see this matter in a light that the Scripture would condemn your connection; therefore I wish you both to understand that from the light God has given me regarding the past and the present, I could not think of employing either of you if you take this step.?{MR926 50.2}[150]
§303 我很震惊,你竟会片刻思想这种事,将你的爱情在这种情况下寄托在一个抛妻弃子的已婚男人身上。我建议你把自己对于这事的想法和计划原原本本地说给我们负责的弟兄们听,好使你听取他们的建议,让他们根据上帝的律法向你说明你所陷入的错误。你们二人即便只是心里想你们可以结婚都是违背律法。你原应在这种念头初露端倪时就予以抵制。{MR926 50.3}[151]
§304 I am astonished that you should for a moment give thought to such a thing, and place your affections on a married man who had left his wife and children under such circumstances. I advise you to lay your thoughts and plans regarding this matter just as they are before our responsible brethren, that you may receive their counsel, and let them show you from the law of God the error into which you have fallen. You have both broken the law even in thinking that you might unite in marriage. You should have repelled the thought at its first suggestion.?{MR926 50.3}[151]
§305 《信函》1895年115号,全信,(致范妮·博尔顿,1895年11月26日)—我不跟你说几句话就不能离开。你已让冲动和感觉作主,否则你原不会做你与我联络时所做过的事。你的品格上有很讨厌的特征在领导着你,控制着你,就是获得想要的东西。你对自己的估计若是保持在适当的范围内,原是正确的。我们作为人应当估量自己的能力、自己的才能,作为上帝的恩赐,要予以保守、珍爱和赏识,因为它们是上帝的恩赐,应当保持纯净圣洁好献给上帝。“在大户人家,不但有金器银器,也有木器瓦器;有作为贵重的,有作为卑贱的。……你要逃避少年的私欲,同那清心祷告主的人追求公义、信德、仁爱、和平”(提后2:20,22)。{MR926 51.1}[152]
§306 Letter 115, 1895, entire letter. (To Fannie Bolton, November 26, 1895)—I cannot leave without saying a few words to you. You have let impulse and feeling be your master, else you could not have done as you have done while you have been connected with me. There is a very objectionable feature in your character, which is leading you, controlling you. It is the attainment of desired objects. Your estimate of yourself, if kept within proper bounds, is right. We as human beings are to estimate our abilities, our faculties, as the gift of God, to be kept, cherished, and appreciated because they are the gift of God, and to be kept pure and holy to be devoted to God.?2 Timothy 2:20, 22.?{MR926 51.1}[152]
§307 我与威利会谈了一次。他说你告诉他我没有照着你所告诉我的把事情说出来。范妮,难道我要得出结论,你所说的一点也不可靠吗?我已完全照着你对我说的说了一些事。我没有夸张,因为那不是我的一个缺点。但你已被仇敌欺骗;你受着欺骗并且在欺骗别人。你对我说你祷告了,如果你得到考德维尔是对的,就让他妻子能得到离婚证书。当你听说她得到了离婚证书时,你说:“我觉得主听了我的祷告,你不这样认为吗,怀姐妹?”{MR926 51.2}[153]
§308 I have had an interview with Willie. He says you told him that I had not stated things as they were told to me by you. Fannie, shall I come to the conclusion that no dependence can be placed in what you say? I have stated matters just as you stated them to me. I did not exaggerate, because that is not one of my faults. But you have been deceived by the enemy; you are deceived and are deceiving others. You made the statement to me that you prayed that if it was right for you to have Caldwell that his wife might obtain a divorce. When you heard that she had obtained a divorce you said, “I feel the Lord has heard my prayer, do not you think so, Sister White?”?{MR926 51.2}[153]
§309 你离开之后,我看着这件事,感到难以形容。这事的状况令我震惊。你自己已向玛吉·黑尔、卢梭姐妹和普雷斯科特姐妹讲了你的爱情故事。我已和这些人交谈过,因为我有责任这么做。你的情况很特殊。我有那么多警告——你发表的言论不真实,你竟说你和考德威尔之间没有恋情。他承认他对你考虑很多,但却叫我明白你们之间没有任何依恋。自从你和他在威利的办公室工作以来,这种情况一直在继续。{MR926 51.3}[154]
§310 After you left I looked upon this matter with such feelings as are not easily described. The matter as it stands is a shock to me. You yourself have told your love story to Maggie Hare and to Sister Rousseau and to Sister Prescott. These I have talked with because it was my duty to do so. Your case is peculiar. I have had so many warnings—you making your statements that were not true that there was no attachment between you and Caldwell. He admitted he had thought a good deal of Fannie, but gave me to understand there was not anything of attachment between you. This has been going on since you and he worked in Willie’s office.?{MR926 51.3}[154]
§311 范妮,你说什么呢?你现在把这事说明了,并且征求我的意见。你只得明白我会有什么意见。你以为他和你会结婚,你们俩都从事我的工作。我告诉过你这绝不可能。{MR926 51.4}[155]
§312 Fannie, what do you say? You have now made the matter plain and asked my advice. You could but understand what that advice would be. You thought that he and you would be married and both take hold?of my work. I told you this could never be.?{MR926 51.4}[155]
§313 当我将沃尔特·哈珀的情况交在你手中去备份时,却感到好像一只手臂伸在你我之间,我当时不明白那是什么意思,但现在我明白了。我不能使你所说你与考德威尔之间没有恋情的声明与主当时在赐给我的亮光和谐一致。我必须接受上帝的话,我与你之间没有和谐。{MR926 52.1}[156]
§314 When I put the case of Walter Harper in your hand to copy, but felt as if an arm was stretched between you and me, I did not understand what it meant, but I do now. I could not harmonize your statements of nothing existing between you and Caldwell, and the light which the Lord was giving me. I must take the word of God, and I had no harmony with you.?{MR926 52.1}[156]
§315 哈珀的情况不是类似的情况。这两种情况已在不同的时间显在我面前。哈珀感到深爱他的妻子,他做了一个凡夫能做的一切去挽救离婚,因为他说:“她会丧失她的灵魂。”他在她身上花了很多钱。他设法说服她,但是没用。她最终派人去叫他看望她,他受到警告要防范。她锁上门,开始向他索要一笔钱,他知道她有一个同伙在等着。他当时感到是他需要主的时候。他伺机突然逃脱了——怎么逃脱的我不记得了——但她告诉他,他逃不了的。我想这是他为她做的最后努力。他可能又试了一次。我劝过他,当时她设法因为被离弃而离婚,却没有出庭,因为在法庭上的陈述绝不会荣耀上帝。在这种情况没有像性欲的东西,因为他没有性功能,所以他的情况无论如何与你的情况或考德威尔的情况是不能相比的。{MR926 52.2}[157]
§316 Harper’s case is not a parallel. Both cases have been presented to me at different times. Harper felt love, deep love, for his wife, and he has done everything a mortal man could do to save a divorce, for said he, “She will lose her soul.” He spent any amount of money on her. He tried to persuade her, but to no account. And she finally sent for him to visit her, and he was warned to be on guard. She locked the door on him and commenced to solicit a sum of money, and he knew she had an accomplice waiting by. He felt now was his time to need the Lord. He watched his opportunity and suddenly escaped—just how I do not remember—but she told him there was no escape for him. I think this was his last effort made in her behalf. He may have tried once more. I advised him, when she tried to get a divorce because of desertion, not to appear, for in no way could God be glorified by the statements coming into court. There was nothing like lust in the case, for he had not physical ability, so it was not in any way a comparison with your case, or with Caldwell’s.?{MR926 52.2}[157]
§317 我已告诉你和他,他不能免除他的责任,直到他设法竭尽所能与他的妻子和好。他抛妻弃子已给上帝的圣工留下一个污点。不是她离开他,而是他离开了她。这对一个女人必是多么强烈的试探啊,他竟承诺她若愿意嫁给他,他就会放弃安息日,他也确实这么做了,直到他彻底不开心,又开始遵守安息日。但他的忍耐力很小,因为他的妻子抗拒真理的影响,他就受不了。要是那些与他相连的人不符合他的心愿,他就能相当无情。尽管她的做法是考验人的,有时是激怒人的,但他若始终细心周到,保持自己作为一个已婚男人的矜持,并且给她证据表明他确实爱她为自己的妻子,为了她他竟然一度出卖真理为要获得她的牵手,他原是能争取到她归顺真理的。这一切的事在她心中都有不利的影响。当她反对他离开来这个国家时,他没有听从,反而撇下了他的两个孩子和他的妻子。要是他有耐心,要是他停止他的批评,并照一个尊重自己妻子的男人应该做的与她交谈,原会赢得她归于真理。她曾再三信服,到了屈服的地步,但他生活中的一些情形,他所讲的一些话,所表现的某种专断的、命令式的性情,却会席卷她,她就会抵抗上帝之灵的争取。这种盛气凌人使她刚硬、冷淡、不可爱。{MR926 52.3}[158]
§318 I have told you and him that he could not be released from his accountability until he should seek to do all in his power to be reconciled with his wife. He has left a stain on the cause of God in leaving her and his children. It was not she who left him, but he who left her. How strong must have been the temptation to a woman whom he married under promise he would give up the Sabbath if she would marry him and he did this until he was so thoroughly unhappy he commenced to keep the Sabbath again. But his power of endurance was small, and because his wife resisted the influences of the truth, he could not bear this. He can be quite unkind if those connected with him do not conform to his wishes. Although her course was trying and at times provoking, she might have been won to the truth if he had always been circumspect, keeping himself reserved as a married man, and had given her evidences that he did truly love her as his wife, for whom he at one point sold the truth to obtain her hand. All these things did not work favorably in her mind. When she opposed his going from home when he came to this country he heeded not, but left his two children and his wife. Had he been patient, had he stopped his criticisms and talked with her as a man should who respects his wife, she would have been won to the truth. She was convinced again and again, and was on the point of yielding, when some circumstances in his life, some words spoken, some disposition to be arbitrary and commanding, would surge over her and she would resist the striving of the Spirit of God. This domineering made her hard and cold and unlovely.?{MR926 52.3}[158]
§319 我已跟考德威尔讲过他与年轻妇人和姑娘们在一起时随便的举止。如果妻子不评论也不提起这些事,是因为她太骄傲了,不这么做。他的考验、他的委屈无论如何,如果他了解这事真正的内在情况,就会看出多少次他都是挑衅者;但他却不将这些事归到自己账上,天上却将这些事记在他的账上。耶和华与考德威尔弟兄有一场辩论。他的专爱自我、他的喜爱自我满足、和他要偏行己路的决心,已使他不可理喻、盛气凌人、专横傲慢。他暴饮暴食的做法损耗了他的消化器官,使他的胃膨胀,也使自然机能承受重担,以致对他的大脑起了反作用,他的记忆也被削弱了。他有心灵的素质,要是在圣灵的影响之下,原会使他处在与现在完全不同的光景中。{MR926 52.4}[159]
§320 I have spoken to Caldwell in regard to his freedom of deportment in company with young women and girls. If the wife does not remark and speak of these things it is because she is too proud to do it. Whatever were his trials, his grievances, if he understood the true inwardness of the matter, he would see how many times he has been the aggressor; but he does not charge these things to his own account which heaven charges to his account. The Lord has a controversy with Brother Caldwell. His?love of self, his love of self-gratification, and his determination to have his own way, have made him unreasonable, overbearing, dictatorial. His practice of over-eating has taxed his digestive organs, distended his stomach, and taxed nature to endure a burden that has reacted upon the brain, and his memory is weakened. He has the qualities of mind that if under the influence of the Holy Spirit would place him in altogether a different light than that in which he now stands.?{MR926 52.4}[159]
§321 情欲使他忘乎所以,他会惩罚没有完全按照他的心愿行事的哑巴牲口,其实是他这个人需要受到惩罚。在他能以不同的眼光看到他的过去之前,他在品格上是不会完全的。{MR926 53.1}[160]
§322 Passion makes him forget himself, and he will punish dumb animals that do not do just as he wished them to do, when it was the man who needed to be punished. Until he can see his past in a different light, he will be imperfect in character.?{MR926 53.1}[160]
§323 他和你已证明了你们对自己的判断的看法——认为比怀姐妹的看法更可靠。你们考虑过怀姐妹为主服务的一生中一直在公正地处理这种情况,与你自己的情况相似的情况和许多各种各样的情况曾在她面前经过,使她知道在这些事上什么是对的什么是错的吗?难道五十多年来一直在上帝的训练之下的判断竟然不如那些没有受过这种训练和教育之人的判断吗?请考虑这些事。{MR926 53.2}[161]
§324 He and you have evidenced your opinion of your own judgment—that it was more reliable than Sister White’s. Did you consider that Sister White has been dealing with just such cases during her life of service for the Master, that cases similar to your own and many varieties of cases have passed before her that should make her know what is right and what is wrong in these things? Is a judgment that has been under the training of God for more than fifty years of no preference to those who have not had this discipline and education? Please consider these things.?{MR926 53.2}[161]
§325 《信函》1895年22a号,第1-3页,(致玛丽安·戴维斯,1895年11月29日)—你会通过我写给你的信看到范妮不可能再与我联络了。她总的来说太像一颗闪烁的流星了,闪现一下就消失在黑暗中了。如果范妮对她灿烂的闪光少些自信,她原会更可靠些。但她的感觉成了她的宗教。所有的亮光、她所拥有认识真理、经手最宝贵盛宴的所有机会,她都没有用在自己身上,除非那会有助于她的自我尊重和虚荣。我确实决不能在灵里与她和谐一致。她似乎在另一个氛围里生活、呼吸和工作着。{MR926 53.3}[162]
§326 Letter 22a, 1895, pp. 1-3. (To Marian Davis, November 29, 1895)—You will see by letters that I have written you that Fannie has no possibility of connecting with me. She is altogether too much like a flashing meteor, to flash up and go out in darkness. If Fannie had less self-confidence in her brilliant flashes, she would be more reliable. But her feelings is her religion. All the light, all the opportunities she has had to know the truth, handling the most precious banquet, she appropriates nothing to herself, unless it will administer to her self esteem and vanity. Certainly I could never harmonize with her in spirit. She seemed to live and breathe and work in another atmosphere.?{MR926 53.3}[162]
§327 我现在从这种忽高忽低的经验解脱出来了。她似乎自我大大膨胀,充满自足自负,充满她自己的能力,而根据上帝喜悦赐给我的亮光,她是我的仇敌,她与我的关系一直是这样。{MR926 53.4}[163]
§328 I am now relieved from this fitful, sky-rocket experience. She seems to swell up into such large measurements of herself, full of self-sufficiency, full of her own capabilities, and from the light God has been pleased to give me, she is my adversary, and has been thus throughout her connection with me.?{MR926 53.4}[163]
§329 我告诉过你她一点也不喜爱她领了工资去做的工作。她的意念充满了多样化,她拥有的是廉价肤浅的宗教,不知道真品是什么。她希望她的生活充满多样化,她会做什么还有待发现。可怜、肤浅的人哪。每当关系到她自己,她就没有正确的宗教原则。……{MR926 53.5}[164]
§330 I have told you she had no love for the work that she was paid to do. Her mind is so full of variety, a cheap surface religion that she knows not what the genuine article is. She wants her life filled with variety, and what she will do remains to be seen. Poor, shallow soul. She does not have correct religious principles whenever herself is concerned....?{MR926 53.5}[164]
§331 12月3日。我以为我能在此前写完这封信,但自从来到这里,我一直很虚弱。我的心脏经过这种反复的冲击已经虚弱了。我感觉不到任何兴趣要提笔。我与范妮在一起经历的情景常常重现,使我心中非常悲痛,以致我现在没有力量振作起来。……{MR926 53.6}[165]
§332 December 3. I thought I would be able to write and close this letter ere this, but since coming here I have been very weak. My heart has had such repeated shocks it is weak. I cannot feel any interest in touching a pen. The scenes I have been passing through with Fannie have been of so oft recurrence and has caused me such great distress of mind that I now have not power to rally....?{MR926 53.6}[165]
§333 主知道将来的一切。两年前祂启示给我,范妮是我的敌人,会使我心中烦恼手发软,但我急着要出版我认为人们需要的东西。然后在新南威尔士州有别的考验临到,一个接一个,使我受不了。唉,要是我听从了上帝给我的指示,不让别的声音或影响进来使我处在不确定中,我原能免受最近这次可怕的心酸的考验。但我盼望主会赦免我,怜悯我,然而这事不可能再试一次了。我愿意她的才干发挥其全部的价值,但它决不会与我有任何关系了。我与范妮·博尔顿在一起的时候已经期满了。{MR926 53.7}[166]
§334 The Lord knows all about the future. Two years ago He revealed to me that Fannie was my adversary, and would vex my soul and weaken my hands, but I was so anxious to get out things that I thought the people needed. Then came other trials in N.S.W. one after another that I was not able to bear it. Oh if I had only heeded the instruction given of God and let no other voice or influence come in to leave me in uncertainty I might have been?saved this last terrible heart-sickening trial. But I hope the Lord will forgive me and have mercy upon me; but to try this matter again is out of the question. I am willing her talent shall be exercised for all it is worth but it will never be in connection with me. I have served my time with Fannie Bolton.?{MR926 53.7}[166]
§335 《信函》1895年105号第1,2页,(致艾米丽·坎贝尔,1895年12月9日)—对我来说,范妮已经成了一个可怕的重担。她对我的工作几乎没有任何兴趣。她的情绪和态度已使我心中非常痛苦。她已重蹈覆辙,走两年前曾在布莱顿走过的老路,尽可能地向普雷斯科特教授夫妇和其他许多人抱怨,说她制作了我全部的著作,还说这些著作是我的,也照样是她的,(你知道那种说法的真实性有多少),然而她和可怜的小玛丽安却被安置在叫人看不见的地方。她很伤心,因为怀姐妹得到了全部荣誉,其实她们的才干已投进工作中。我叫她在纸上写出哪种认可会令她高兴,但她没有写。{MR926 54.1}[167]
§336 Letter 105, 1895, pp. 1, 2. (To Emily Campbell, December 9, 1895)—Fannie has been a terrible burden to me. She has had scarcely any interest in my work. She has caused me great suffering of mind by her moods and attitude. She has gone over the same ground again that she went over two years ago in Brighton, making her complaints to Professor Prescott and wife and as many others as she could, that she made over all my writings, and that these writings were hers as much as mine, (you know how much of that is truth), and yet she and poor little Marian were set down out of sight. She was grieved because Sister White got the credit of all, when their talent was put into the work. I asked her to write out on paper just what kind of recognition would please her, but this she has not done.?{MR926 54.1}[167]
§337 尽管认为几乎不可能去参加墨尔本的聚会,我还是在极大的虚弱中去了。撒但看到范妮正合乎他使用,他也确实利用了她。她就在那次重要的帐篷大会中间行出了他的品性。她似乎没有力量抵抗仇敌的作为,我则受到重压,像一辆装满禾捆的车。我很虚弱,我的心脏很弱,我担心我会死。……{MR926 54.2}[168]
§338 Notwithstanding it was thought next to an impossibility to attend the Melbourne meeting, I went in great feebleness. Satan saw that Fannie was in a right frame for him to use, and he did use her. She worked out his attributes right in the midst of that important camp-meeting. She seemed to have no power to resist the workings of the enemy, and I was weighed down as a cart beneath sheaves. I was so weak, my heart was so feeble, I feared I should die....?{MR926 54.2}[168]
§339 我已与范妮完全断开了。谁会填补她的空缺我说不上。她求我接她回来,但我决不会再让她与我联络了。{MR926 54.3}[169]
§340 I have disconnected entirely from Fannie. Who will fill her place I cannot tell. She begs and pleads to be taken back, but I will never, never connect her with me again.?{MR926 54.3}[169]
§341 考德威尔和她已经有了恋情,而且是在他的妻子还在世的时候。她还没有跟他离婚,但你能看到他们二人谁也没有权利在那方面彼此相爱。他们以为他们能结婚,并且都参与我的工作。要是我认可这事,他们就会立刻结婚。他们的属灵辨识力在哪里呢?如果我们让撒但控制我们,他就会使用什么样的大脑啊!这会给我和我的工作带来何等大的丑闻啊!{MR926 54.4}[170]
§342 Caldwell and she have formed an attachment, and that while his wife was living. She has not obtained a divorce from him, but you can see that neither of them have any right to have the least love for one another in that line. They thought they could get married, and both engage in doing my work. They would marry at once if I would sanction it. Where is their spiritual discernment? O what a brain Satan will use if we will let him control us. What a scandal this would be upon me and my work!?{MR926 54.4}[170]
§343 好了,关于这一点我不会再写了。你知道我怎样警告过他们,我多么努力作工为要阻止一种会导致这种的结果的做法。{MR926 54.5}[171]
§344 Well, I will write no more on this point. You know how I have warned them, and how hard I have worked to prevent a course of action that would lead to such results.?{MR926 54.5}[171]
§345 《信函》1895年123a号,全信,(致J.E.怀特,1895年12月9日)—去年我的工人们一直使我受到剧烈的考验。范妮·博尔顿已经完全与我分离了。我不会再想聘请她了。她可怕地误表了我,伤害了我。单单在参与我的工作上她就伤害了我。她向他人报告说她在我的文章制作上做了与我一样的事,她全心投入在那些文章上,而我却得到了她投入到这些著作中的才能的荣誉。好了,这是她第五次说这种话了。这与可拉、大坍、亚比兰的闹事相似,只是她没有那些人与她联合,因为他们了解我和我的工作。她不仅去找那些相信我和认识我的人去讲她的故事,还去找那些初信的人,告诉他们她想象出来的故事,表达了与《民数记》16:3中同样的情绪。{MR926 54.6}[172]
§346 Letter 123a, 1895, entire letter. (To J. E. White, December 9, 1895)—I have been sorely tried for the past year with my workers. Fannie Bolton is disconnected with me entirely. I would not think of employing her any longer. She has misrepresented me and hurt me terribly. Only in connection with my work has she hurt me. She has reported to others that she has the same as made over my articles, that she has put her whole soul into them, and I had the credit of the ability she had given to these writings. Well, this is the fifth time this breaking out has come. It is something similar to the outbreak of Korah, Dathan, and Abiram, only she has not those to unite with her because they know me and my work. She goes not only to those who believe and know me to tell her story but she goes to those newly come to the faith and tells her imaginative story. The same sentiment is expressed as in?Numbers 16:3.?{MR926 54.6}[172]
§347 撒但的恶念时而进入她里面,控制她的想象。她就显得非常悲痛,忧伤,哭泣。普雷斯科特姐妹还在库兰邦的时候,曾问她怎么回事。她似乎抑制着不愿讲,最终还是做了她正打算做的事——做出她的声明,抱怨“可怜的小玛丽安”和她很少“因她们奉献到怀姐妹工作中的所有才干”而受到关注。我的这些工人被安置在角落,被隐藏了。好了,普雷斯科特姐妹果断地对付了她,普雷斯科特弟兄也是这样。他们告诉她,这完全是魔鬼的作为。他们在她接触之前就知道怀姐妹的工作和著作,而且他们从怀姐妹收到的信函正和她笔下出来的内容一样,范妮所声称放进怀著中的那些词句是她自己的想象。所有的观念,所有的材料都被提供给她好预备成文章了,等等。{MR926 54.7}[173]
§348 The very mischief of Satan comes now and then into her,?controlling her imagination. She appears in great distress and grief, weeping. Sister Prescott, while in Cooranbong, asked her what was the matter. She held back apparently reluctant to speak, and finally she did just exactly that which she calculated to do—make her statement and complained of the little attention “poor little Marian” and she received “for all the talent they gave to Sister White’s work.” These my workers were set down in a corner and hid. Well, Sister Prescott met her decidedly, also Brother Prescott. They told her this was all the work of the devil. They knew Sister White’s work and writings before she touched it, and they received letters from her just as they came from her pen and that the very words she claimed to put into the writings were her own imagination. All the ideas, all the material, was furnished her to prepare into articles, etc., etc.?{MR926 54.7}[173]
§349 当我收回曾放在她手中的所有著作时,她才开始认为我是认真的。我果断地告诉她,她必须与我和我的工作没有任何关系。她会将我和我的工作描绘成是出自她的,说这个“美妙的表达”是她的,那个也是她的,并使上帝之灵的证言无效。好了,我不能写出我心中经受的所有痛苦。我不可能叙述我在墨尔本参加帐篷大会时心中的痛苦。我告诉范妮,我不能让她参与我的工作了。没有一个人能确定恶魔何时会附上她并要了我的命。我告诉她,她从未喜爱工作,她的情绪,她浮躁易变的性情已经成了我生活中最大的忧伤。我就像一辆装满禾捆在重压之下的车,我不会再冒这个险了。{MR926 55.1}[174]
§350 When I called back all the writings placed in her hands, then she began to think I was in earnest. I told her decidedly she must have no connection with me and my work. She could represent me and my work as her originating, that this “beautiful expression” was hers, and that was hers, and make of none effect the testimony of the Spirit of God. Well, I cannot write all the suffering of mind I endured. I could not possibly relate the suffering of mind while attending the camp meeting at Melbourne. I told Fannie I could not connect her with the work. No one could determine when the demon would take possession of her and cost me my life. I told her she never loved to work, and her moods, her fickle temperament, had been to me the greatest grief of my life. I was as a cart pressed beneath sheaves, and no longer would I venture this.?{MR926 55.1}[174]
§351 唉,我心很痛,因为其它一些事情的发展和显明使我承受了可怕的压力。就是考德威尔和范妮之间的亲密之举。我已将所有危险向他们陈明,但他们却矢口否认。然而在墨尔本开会时,范妮承认她爱考德威尔,并说考德威尔也爱她。我努力让他们看清这事的实质。考德威尔的妻子尚在人间。最近她收到了考德威尔的离婚协议书。他抛弃她已经三年之久了。然而范妮告诉我,她一直在祷告,如果她应该和考德威尔结婚,他妻子就能得到离婚协议书。何等的盲目会临到那些开始偏离正路的人啊!这二人都认为他们可以结婚,齐心推进我的工作。期望我把全部的事务的管理都交在他手里。但我告诉他们恰恰与此相反。他们若走这步,就会永远与我断绝关系,因为考德威尔没有道德权利再娶别人。{MR926 55.2}[175]
§352 But oh, the heartache, for other things were developing and being made manifest which had been a fearful strain on me. It was the intimacy between Caldwell and her. I had presented before them all the dangers, but they denied it. But at the meeting at Melbourne Fannie acknowledge she loved Caldwell and he loved her. I tried to present the matter before them in its true bearing. Caldwell had a wife living. Recently she obtained a divorce. He had left her and been gone three years. But Fannie told me she had been praying that if it was right she should marry Caldwell that his wife might obtain a divorce. What blindness will come to those who begin to depart from a straightforward course! These two had thought they could unite in marriage and they could both unite in carrying on my work. The management of all my business would be supposed to be in his hands. Not much, I told them. Such a step would cut them off from me forever, both of them, because Caldwell had no moral right to [marry].?{MR926 55.2}[175]
§353 《信函》1895年127号第1,4-6页,(致“孩子们,”1895年12月11日)—我开始给你们写一些关于范妮的事,但我认为这不是最好的。那个可怜的姑娘会有段时间够难过的。我不会使她更难过。我将这个放在我开始要写的内容之上[好几行作了标记],重编了页码,因为我去掉了两页。足以说明范妮不再参与我的工作了。我最真诚地同情她。我为她的灵魂担心,但我希望她不受伤害。她虽使我非常忧伤,但我祈愿主赦免她。我同样愿望她出众的才干得到认可。这次她已充分受到惩罚。……{MR926 55.3}[176]
§354 Letter 127, 1895, pp. 1, 4-6. (To “Children,” December 11, 1895)—I commenced to write you some things in regard to Fannie, but I think it not best. The poor girl will have hard time enough in getting along. I will not make it any harder for her. I put this over the matter I commenced to write [several lines marked out], and re-page, for I take out two pages. It is enough to state Fannie has no longer any connection with me in the work. I pity her most sincerely. I fear for her soul, but I wish her no harm. She has caused me great sorrow, but may the Lord forgive her is my prayer. It is the same desire for her superior talents to be recognized. This time she has been sufficiently punished....?{MR926 55.3}[176]
§355 自从她来到澳大利亚,应该帮助我的那个人已经成了我的一大重担。我已经忍受并且做了一切所能做的去帮助范妮,然而当她发这些脾气的时候,她似乎被撒但鼓动了。她后来忏悔了,但此前不像这次这么充分,然而她是不可靠的。她设法让撒拉将一封写给凯洛格医生的信放在她手中,以便看到是否有写到她的什么内容。撒拉告诉她,她决不会那么做的。她问她:“你要我做什么,范妮?难道这就是你在参与怀姐妹的工作这么久之后要教导我的原则吗?难道你要教导我辜负我的委托,去偷一篇著作,一封要寄到美国的私人信函,将它放在你手中去读其中的内容吗?”她怂恿了这事,撒拉不愿依从,她就因此大受搅扰。所以你们就知道我怎么能依靠这种助手呢。……{MR926 55.4}[177]
§356 The one who is supposed to help me has been a great burden to me since she came to Australia. I?have borne and done everything that I could do to help Fannie, but when she gets into these tantrums she seems inspired by Satan. She afterwards confesses, but not quite as fully heretofore as this time, but she cannot be trusted. She tried to get Sara to put into her hands a letter written to Dr. Kellogg, so that she could see if there was anything written about her. Sara told her she would never do that. She asked her, “What do you take me to be, Fannie? Is this the principle you would teach me, after being so long connected with Sister White in her work? Would you teach me to betray my trust, to steal a writing, a private letter to go to America, and put it in your hands to read its contents?” This matter she urged and Sara would not comply and she was greatly stirred up over it. So you see what dependence I can put in such helpers....?{MR926 55.4}[177]
§357 我现在要问你们能否找到什么人愿意为我工作,编辑我的文章并为书籍预备文稿。……我不想要任何一个会觉得有权将我要交给他们的内容改变成他们自以为美好博学的语言的人。我希望我自己的风格出现在我自己的措辞里。{MR926 56.1}[178]
§358 I will now ask you if you can see anyone who will work for me to edit my articles and prepare manuscript for books.... I do not want any person who will feel it her prerogative to change the matter I shall give them into their own supposed beautiful, learned language. I want my own style to appear in my own words.?{MR926 56.1}[178]
§359 《信函》1895年104号,全信,(致艾迪和梅·沃林,1895年12月11日)—我近来一直不能多多从事写作。在上次的帐篷大会上,范妮采取的做法具有一种梅会理解的性质,与我两年前在墨尔本曾不得不对付的东西类似。自从那时以来,我与范妮极少和谐。我设法使她接受和赏识如丰盛筵席一般摆在她面前的宝贵真理,然而她在处理这些真理时,却没有享用它们。她全部视之为稀松平常的东西。{MR926 56.2}[179]
§360 Letter 104, 1895, entire letter. (To Addie and May Walling, December 11, 1895)—I have not been able to do much writing of late. At the last camp meeting the course taken by Fannie was of a character that May will understand. It was similar to that which I had to meet in Melbourne two years ago. Since that period I have had but very little harmony with Fannie. I have tried to have her receive and appropriate the precious truths that were spread before her as a rich banquet, but while she handled these truths she did not feast upon them. She regarded it all as a common thing.?{MR926 56.2}[179]
§361 所赐的警告、呼吁、宝贵的亮光、真理的瑰宝对范妮来说显然是没有价值的。她觉得自己在她自以为有的才干方面如此富足,以致一无所缺。神圣的事物对她来说不比凡火更有价值,她在凡火的光中工作和行走。“凡你们点火,用火把围绕自己的可以行在你们的火焰里,并你们所点的火把中。这是我手所定的;你们必躺在悲惨之中。”“耶稣说:‘我为审判到这世上来,叫不能看见的,可以看见;能看见的,反瞎了眼。’同祂在那里的法利赛人听见这话,就说:‘难道我们也瞎了眼吗?’耶稣对他们说:‘你们若瞎了眼,就没有罪了;但如今你们说“我们能看见”,所以你们的罪还在’”(赛50:11;约9:39-41)。{MR926 56.3}[180]
§362 The warnings, the appeals, the precious light given, the jewels of truth were apparently of no value to Fannie. She was feeling so rich in her supposed treasure of talents, that she wanted nothing. Sacred things were of no more value to her than the common fire, and she worked and walked in its light. [Isaiah 50:11;?John 9:39-41?quoted.]?{MR926 56.3}[180]
§363 这就是范妮·博尔顿真实的属灵状况。我因她的做法、她易变的情绪、她不定的作风遭受了何等的悲痛,何等的忧伤啊!但我不得不与她分开,因为我的生命和上帝的事业受到了危害。{MR926 56.4}[181]
§364 This is the true situation of Fannie Bolton’s spiritual condition. O what sadness, what grief have I suffered because of her course of action, her changeable moods, her fitful course! But I was compelled to separate from her, for my life and the cause of God were imperiled.?{MR926 56.4}[181]
§365 我可以预料她品格上的反复无常在任何时间表现出来。这在阿马代尔的聚会上就表现出来了,我当时当地就摆脱了她。我决不会再将文稿放在她手中了,因为她声称她应该因我书籍的制作和我所写的文章得到荣誉,并将整件事摆在她认为会信任她的任何人面前。她受到了普雷斯科特弟兄和姐妹坚决的对付,说这是不可能的,因为一些人有那么多我亲手写的信,他们知道更好。{MR926 56.5}[182]
§366 I might expect any freak in her character to be manifested at any time. This came out at the meeting at Armadale, and I cut loose from her then and there. Never will I put another manuscript in her hands for she claims that she should be credited with the making of my books and the articles I write, and lays the whole matter out before whomsoever she thinks will give her credence. She was met by Brother and Sister Prescott with decided words that this could not be, for some have so many letters in my own handwriting that they know better.?{MR926 56.5}[182]
§367 当她也一无所获时,她就陷入极大的悲痛中。当我告诉她,她不能再参与我的工作时,她忏悔了,但她能做的一切忏悔也不能使她回到原位了。{MR926 56.6}[183]
§368 When she saw that she prevailed nothing, she went into great distress. When I told her that she could no longer work in connection with me, she confessed, but all the confessions she might make cannot replace her.?{MR926 56.6}[183]
§369 你们知道我现在没有助手。我不觉得玛丽·斯图尔特是能符合要求的一位。伯纳姆姐妹与《回声》出版社结合了,我不能叫她与我联合。我心中想着在南兰卡斯特学校的霍尔姐妹,希望她能成为我想要的人。{MR926 56.7}[184]
§370 You see now I have no helper. I do not feel that Mary Stewart is the one to fill the bill. Sister Burnham is wedded to the Echo Office, and I cannot get her to connect with me. I have had my mind on Sister Hall at the School at South Lancaster and I hope that she can be what I want.?{MR926 56.7}[184]
§371 你们若是想到什么人能参与我的工作,请让我知道。要是我能有工人,我就有许多书想要写,也能写,但我需要工人。{MR926 57.1}[185]
§372 If you think of anyone who can work in connection with me, please let me know. I have many books which I wish to write and can write if I can have workers, but I need workers.?{MR926 57.1}[185]
§373 《信函》1895年106号第1-6页,(致J.H.凯洛格,1895年12月20日)—我寄给你我写给范妮·博尔顿的一些信的副本。我扣留它们是因为我不想将她的情况公开。但我在上次的帐篷大会上与她有最严重的困难。我现在没有任何一个人为期刊预备文章或预备书籍了。我感到我没有得到足够的帮助,然而当我不得不摆脱范妮时,那对我是一个痛苦的考验。我对得到适当的帮助感到有些灰心。{MR926 59.1}[186]
§374 Letter 106, 1895, pp. 1-6. (To J. H. Kellogg, December 20, 1895)—I send you copies of letters written to Fannie Bolton. I have withheld them because I do not desire to make her case public. But I have had the most serious difficulty with her at last camp meeting. I am now left without anyone to prepare articles for papers or prepare books. I have felt I had little enough help, but when I was compelled to cut loose from Fannie, it was a sore trial to me. I feel somewhat discouraged about getting proper help.?{MR926 59.1}[186]
§375 我为范妮担心很长时间了。我看不到她对工作有什么真正的兴趣。她有最宝贵的关于实际敬虔的内容呈在她面前。她要是以她每天处理的题目为食,原会得到属灵的食物和基督徒经验。但我却没有得到证据表明她捕捉了宝贵的想法,反而机械地、被动地一带而过,没有吸收它们并用在自己身上。宝贵的东西变得稀松平常了。可怜的人,她以虚构为食而不是以真理为食。{MR926 59.2}[187]
§376 I was troubled about Fannie for a long time. I could not see that she had any real interest in the work. She had the most precious matter of practical godliness presented before her. She was handling subjects every day that if she fed upon them would give her spiritual food and Christian experience. But I received not the evidence that she caught the precious ideas, but rushed through them mechanically, passively, without taking them in and appropriating them to herself. The precious things became common. Poor soul, she feeds upon fiction more than upon the truth.?{MR926 59.2}[187]
§377 她有一种忽高忽低的性情,这一刻高比青天,下一刻就跌落深谷,低到与她上到的高度相称。{MR926 59.3}[188]
§378 She has a temperament that is high as the skies at one moment, and the next is deep down in proportion as she was up.?{MR926 59.3}[188]
§379 但她却将我的著作描绘成需要全部打碎,以另一种风格整理起来。如果情况是这样,那么我越早放下笔,就越好。想象力是好的,但是当它导致一种只是造成情绪的高飞的压力时,我就不愿意让它与我的工作混在一起了。{MR926 59.4}[189]
§380 But she has represented my writings as being in need of taking all to pieces and doing up in another style. If this is the case the sooner I lay down my pen the better. The power of imagination is good, but when it leads to a highflown strain that only creates emotions, I do not care for it to be mingled with my work.?{MR926 59.4}[189]
§381 好了,我不能分享悲痛苦恼的细节,但是说说主赐给我的关于她在做什么的警告就够了,然而我处在不知道要做什么的地步。我告诉玛丽安·戴维斯,范妮对工作没有兴趣。我与她没有联合。但玛丽安为她申辩,说:“哦,范妮累了。当她得到休息的时候,她做得就会不同了。”{MR926 59.5}[190]
§382 Well, the heart-sickening detail I cannot enter into, but enough to say that warnings were given me from the Lord of what she was doing, but I was in a position where I knew not what to do. I told Marian Davis that Fannie had no interest in the work. I had no union with her. But Marian excused her, saying, “O, Fannie is tired. When she gets rested she will do differently.”?{MR926 59.5}[190]
§383 我在我自己的家里孤立了。我不能期待得到同情,因为家里的那些人不理解也不能理解现状。他们看不出我的职位、责任和使命。{MR926 59.6}[191]
§384 I have stood alone in my own house. I cannot expect to receive sympathy when there are those who do not and can not take in the situation. They can not discern my position and duty and mission.?{MR926 59.6}[191]
§385 主已将整个问题以比喻和表号展现在我面前,说明范妮·博尔顿是我的敌人。我从来没有为她在不同方面的她自以为的热心或她惊人的才干而奉承她,也不能感到与她有和谐。{MR926 60.1}[192]
§386 I have had opened before me the whole matter in figures and symbols, that Fannie Bolton was my adversary. I did not ever flatter her for her supposed zeal in different lines, or for her wonderful talent, and I could not feel in harmony with her.?{MR926 60.1}[192]
§387 我们从美国抵达悉尼之后不久,她扭伤了踝关节。我告诉她要做什么,要保持安静,不要用踝关节走路。但是与我在一起的某个人说:“可怜的范妮,我认为这不会伤害她。”我的建议就被忽视了。她从十二月一日一直跛到第二年十月。{MR926 60.2}[193]
§388 Soon after we arrived in Sydney from America, she sprained her ankle. I told her just what to do, to keep quiet and not to walk on it. But some with me said, “Poor Fannie, I don’tthink it will hurt her,” and my advice was ignored. She was a cripple from the first of December until the next October.?{MR926 60.2}[193]
§389 然后我从范妮得知她爱上了来自加利福尼亚的一个年轻人,是她曾在安阿伯遇到过的。我想那是布莱克利。她有时行事好像被一个污鬼附着的人,她开始使我们大家都悲惨。我想她后悔这种做法了。{MR926 60.3}[194]
§390 Then I learned through Fannie that she was in love with a young man from California whom she had met at Ann Arbor. I think it was Blakley. She acted at times as if possessed of an evil spirit, and she set in to make us all miserable. This course she repented of, I think.?{MR926 60.3}[194]
§391 我在普雷斯顿遭受大痛苦期间,没有得到范妮的同情。然后我告诉她,我决不能同意让她成为我家庭的一个成员了。我不怀疑她是一个有才华的女子,因为她任何时候都能说服我。要不是有主丰富的福气,她原会使我在我家里的生活很苦。我昼夜都有主的同在。我因生命之水而舒畅。{MR926 60.4}[195]
§392 I received little sympathy from Fannie during my great suffering of eleven months in Preston. I then told her that I could never consent to have her a member of my family. I did not doubt she was a woman of talent, for she could talk me down any time. She was sometimes impudent and accusing. She would have made my life in my home bitterness, but for the rich blessing of the Lord. I had His presence with me day and night. I was refreshed by the waters of life.?{MR926 60.4}[195]
§393 两年前在布莱顿的帐篷大会上,她又开始从事作我敌人的工作,向他人报告我不能重述的一切。但她造成了这种局面,在她的描绘中,你会以为她是她所预备的那些文章的作者,并且主张应当承认玛丽安和范妮在发表带有我签名的出版物上是与我合作的。{MR926 60.5}[196]
§394 Two years ago at Brighton camp meeting she began her work again as my adversary, reporting to others all of which I cannot repeat. But she created such a state of things in her representation that you would have supposed her to be the author of the articles she prepared, and maintained that it should be acknowledged that Marian and Fannie were in copartnership with me in the publications bearing my signature.?{MR926 60.5}[196]
§395 我再三告诉她我不想要她的话,而要我的话,而当我发现她插入自己的话,取代我用来表达我的想法的话时,我就用笔划掉它。{MR926 60.6}[197]
§396 I told her again and again that I wanted not her words, but my words, and when I discovered words she had inserted of her own, in the place of the words in which I had expressed my ideas, I put my pen across it.?{MR926 60.6}[197]
§397 两年前我在一次长期痛苦的经历之后解雇了她。我请她写下她渴望得到认可的形式。但她不愿这么做。她声称要归正,完全改变,并且做出了谦卑的认罪,以致我想我愿意再试她一次。但她依然故我,而今撒但开始利用她,像他在墨尔本阿马代尔帐篷大会上所做的一样。{MR926 60.7}[198]
§398 Two years ago I discharged her after a long, painful experience. I asked her to put into writing the form of recognition she craved. But she would not do this. She claimed to be converted, changed entirely and made such humble confessions that I thought I would try her again. But she is the same, and now Satan begins to use her as he has done at the Armadale camp meeting, Melbourne.?{MR926 60.7}[198]
§399 除了这一切,还有她对考德威尔的一种相思的感情主义。他们以为这件事是秘密进行的,然而事实不是这样。那些感知能力没有减弱的人知道他们想要知道的一切。考德威尔是一个已婚男人,有两个孩子,最大的约有十岁。他已离开他的妻子三年了,根据主所喜悦赐给我的亮光,他决不是一个有耐心的、仁慈、周到的丈夫。他妻子在他离开的这三年没有给他写过一句话。我想她是恨他的。她已得到他的离婚协议,然而此前范妮和考德威尔、考德威尔和范妮就已彼此保证要相恋相爱了。他们以为要是他们结婚了,还能联合起来监管我的住所和我的作品。在妻子得到离婚协议书后,他就说她不忠于他,他有自由与他愿意的人结婚了。{MR926 60.8}[199]
§400 With it all there has been a lovesick sentimentalism for Caldwell. The affair had been carried on as they thought, in secrecy, but it was not thus. Those whose perceptive faculties were not dimmed know all they wished to know. Caldwell is a married man, with two children, the eldest about ten years old. He has been absent from his wife three years, and from the light the Lord has been pleased to give me, he has been anything but a patient, kind, thoughtful husband. His wife has not written him a line for the three years he has been absent. I think she hated him. She has obtained a divorce from him, but before this was done the attachment and love had been pledged to one another Fannie to Caldwell, and Caldwell to Fannie. They supposed that if they were married, they could be united in taking the supervision of my place and my writings. After the wife had obtained a divorce, then he said she was not true to him, and he was free to marry whom he would.?{MR926 60.8}[199]
§401 我告诉范妮·博尔顿,与她联络几乎要了我的命,要是我有另一个人与她联合起来,我要处理两个人,我很快就会被埋葬。不,我完全与范妮分开了。只要时间持续,决不会再有我的文章经她的手了。她已设法背叛我,变成叛徒,说那些在人们心中留下不真实印象的话。她已自学了一种戏剧性方法,能将虚假的事以一种显然的真诚表演出来。{MR926 60.9}[200]
§402 I told Fannie Bolton that it had nearly cost me my life to connect with her, and if I had another one united with her and the two to handle, I should soon be buried. No, I am entirely separated from?Fannie. Never while time lasts will another article of mine pass into her hands. She has sought to betray me, to turn traitor, to say things that leave untrue impressions upon minds. She has educated herself in theatrical methods, and can act out to life in apparent sincerity a thing that is false.?{MR926 60.9}[200]
§403 普雷斯科特弟兄和姐妹帮了我一个大忙,尽管范妮那自命不凡的表演很能骗人。他们和其他许多人曾以为这个女人是诚实的,真的是她假装的那样的。{MR926 61.1}[201]
§404 Brother and Sister Prescott have done me a good service, although her pretentious acting was so deceiving. They and many others thought the woman was honest, and was really all she pretended to be.?{MR926 61.1}[201]
§405 范妮自己尽管在行欺骗,虽然如她所认为,她骗了我将近一年,竟然放肆地告诉我她在从事查经工作时,她的话是上帝默示的。她会说她正与之交谈的人如何奇妙地受了影响,会变得苍白。这事的奇怪部分是我们自己的人竟然那么欣然将戏剧性表现接受为上帝之灵的灵感。我更为惊讶的是,在这种情况下,他们竟然鼓励她参与圣事。{MR926 61.2}[202]
§406 Fannie herself, notwithstanding the deception she was practicing, though she had, as she thought, deceived me for nearly one year, had the presumption to tell me that in her work of giving Bible readings, her words were inspired. She would tell how the ones she was talking with were wonderfully affected, and would turn pale. The strange part of the matter is that our own people are so ready to accept theatrical demonstrations as the inspiration of the Spirit of God. And I am more surprised, under the circumstances that they should encourage her to connect with sacred things.?{MR926 61.2}[202]
§407 她力劝我、请求我、哭着要我再次接纳她参与我的工作。然而我说:“不,因为你就你为期刊和书籍预备文章作了虚假陈述,是我所否认的。你带着明显的诚意和诚实对别人也对我说你认为主已默示你要改变我所写的话,用你自己的话来代替。我称此为你自己点燃的凡火。”{MR926 61.3}[203]
§408 She has urged, and begged, and cried, for me to take her back again into my service. But I said, “No, for you make false statements in regard to your preparing the articles for papers and books, which I deny. With all apparent sincerity and honesty you state to others and to me, that you think the Lord has inspired you to changed the words I have traced, and substitute your own for them. I call this a strange fire of your own kindling.”?{MR926 61.3}[203]
§409 我们不久就听到范妮失去了健康,病倒在床,已决定回美国去。接下来,一周前的上个星期五,她发来一封电报,说她约在晚上九点钟会到莫里塞特站。{MR926 61.4}[204]
§410 We soon heard that Fannie was in broken health, sick in bed, and had decided to return to America. Next, one week ago last Friday, she sent a telegram, that she would come to Morisset station about nine o’clock at night.?{MR926 61.4}[204]
§411 我的马和马车为她跑了四英里半。校舍那天晚上接待了她,她到我附近这里来只是为看看她在帐篷里的东西。我听说她看起来像一个神经兮兮的人。她咨询了墨尔本的医生,得到的方子是大量吃鸡蛋。她说她必须吃肉和牡蛎和这种东西以便建造身体。她目前在香农弟兄和姐妹家,他们有一栋四个房间的小房子,建在一座小山上,那里马车难以上去,然而是一个幽静的、有益健康的地点。她的状况不适宜去美国的长途海上航行,而会留下来,直到她的健康状况更好些。{MR926 61.5}[205]
§412 My horses and carriage went for her four miles and a half. The school building took her in that night, and she has been near me here only to see to her things in the tent. She appears, I hear, almost as a nervous wreck. She consulted physicians in Melbourne, who prescribed for her to eat largely of eggs. She says she must have meat and oysters and such things in order to build up. She is now at Brother and Sister Shannon’s who have taken a small home of four rooms, which is built upon a hill where it is very difficult for a carriage to approach, but is a retired, healthful location. She is in no condition to go on the long sea voyage to America, but will remain until she has better health.?{MR926 61.5}[205]
§413 香农姐妹手上会有一个负担了。可怜的人,我同情她,但她现在对范妮有所认识了,且已选择这么做。我不想去见范妮。我对她没有益处。她会曲解我的话,会虚伪地叙述我。她会侧耳倾听,她的耳朵只会听她想听到的东西。……{MR926 61.6}[206]
§414 Sister Shannon will have a burden on her hands. Poor soul, I pity her, but she has now a knowledge of Fannie, and has chosen to do this. I do not wish to see Fannie. I can do her no good. She will misconstrue my words, and will misstate me. She will hear with ears that will hear only what she wants to hear....?{MR926 61.6}[206]
§415 现在说说爱德森,我向奥尔森弟兄提出了这个问题。我设法将我与范妮联络时我的处境摆在他面前,然而我想范妮曾与他谈过不少,像她对每一个人所做的那样,描绘预备出自我笔下的文章的大困难。他建议我带范妮去非洲。我认为由于某种原因,奥尔森弟兄并没有理解我们在这个国家这里的情况。我确信关于我与工作的关系,关于范妮与我的关系,他的理解力很迟钝。她描绘事情的方式那么误导人。她会以这种哀婉动人的话说:“怀姐妹并不理解我。我的动机被误解了。”{MR926 61.7}[207]
§416 Now in regard to Edson, I presented the matter to Brother Olsen. I tried to lay before him my situation in connection with Fannie, but Fannie, I think, had considerable talk with him, as she does to every one, in representing the great difficulty in preparing the articles from my pen. He recommended that I take Fannie with me to Africa. I think for some reason Brother Olsen does not comprehend how we were situated here in this country. I am sure he was very dull of comprehension in regard to my relation to the work and in regard to Fannie’s connection with me. The way she represents matters is so misleading. She will say with such pathos, “Sister White does not understand me. My motives are misapprehended.”?{MR926 61.7}[207]
§417 耶稣已告诉我们,果子证明树的性质,可是与范妮没有密切关系的人有段时间确实受骗了,我也被错误判断了。我说不出我要做什么。我在变老,上帝赐给我的工作现在应该迅速做成,然而我的助手在哪里呢?{MR926 62.1}[208]
§418 Jesus has told us that the fruit testifies of the character of the tree, and yet persons who do not have an intimate connection with Fannie for some time are certainly deceived, and I am misjudged. I cannot tell what I shall do. I am getting older, and my work given me of God should now be done rapidly, but where are my helpers??{MR926 62.1}[208]
§419 《信函》1896年116号第2,10,11号,(致威尔逊弟兄和姐妹,1896年1月1日)—范妮·博尔顿上周上到这里来了[库兰邦],因神经衰弱而崩溃。撒拉·麦克恩特弗会给她治疗。她希望这个月乘船去美国,但我担心她去不了。可怜的人;她因偏行己路和随从自己的冲动而有了一段最严重的时期。……[1月9日]前些日子范妮·博尔顿来到这里准备她的东西,然后去美国;但她处于神经衰弱的状态,会寄宿在香农姐妹家一段时间。{MR926 62.2}[209]
§420 Letter 116, 1896, pp. 2, 10, 11. (To Bro. and Sr. Wilson, January 1, 1896)—Fannie Bolton came up here [Cooranbong] last week, broken down with nervous prostration. Sara McEnterfer will give her treatment. She expected to take the boat this month for America, but I fear she will be unable to do this. Poor soul; she is having a most serious time in having her own way and following her own impulses.... [January 9:] Some days ago Fannie Bolton came here to prepare her things, and then go to America; but she is in a condition of nervous prostration, and will board with Sr. Shannon for a time.?{MR926 62.2}[209]
§421 《信函》1896年21号第2,3页,(致W.A.科尔科德,1896年1月7日)—关于范妮(博尔顿),她有一年没有做什么工作。自从阿什菲尔德帐篷大会以后,她的心思就转到别的事情上去了,被与上帝圣工的服务无关的事情占据了,撒但影响了她的想象。并不是与我有关的工作使她的神经系统衰竭的,而是因为它在实行隐密、欺骗和不道德行为。并不是因为对她的要求,而是因为她在点火,并且行在她自己所点的火把中,与她很想要另一个女人的丈夫有关——苦恋的情感主义。在普雷斯顿时,并不是我的工作影响了她,使她神经衰竭的,而是她害相思病的感伤主义,为了一个已经放弃了真理的在美国的男人。她期待他会写信给她,重新开始向她献殷勤,却没有收到他的信,她几乎因上帝的天意而亵渎上帝了。她会问:“为什么上帝允许这些事存在呢?”其激烈而反叛的精神令我惊恐。现在表面看来那个可怜的范妮是在为怀姐妹工作时垮掉了,好像我令她工作致死似的。这并非真相,然而人们会这样认为。范妮已经偏行己路,必须遭受她自己行为的结果,但我必定有污名,而且会有印象传出去说可怜的范妮工作致死。我为这个姑娘感到很难过。我很难过她在受苦。但关于我的工作必定会造成错误的印象。{MR926 62.3}[210]
§422 Letter 21, 1896, pp. 2, 3. (To W. A. Colcord, January 7, 1896)—In regard to Fannie, she has done very little of the work for one year. Since the Ashfield camp meeting her mind has been diverted to other things, preoccupied with things that were of no service to the cause of God, and Satan has worked upon her imagination. It is not the work connected with me that has prostrated her nervous system. It is practicing a course of secrecy and deception and wrong-doing. It is not the requirements made upon her, but it is kindling a fire and walking in the sparks of her own kindling in connection with her wonderful desire for another woman’s husband; lovesick sentimentalism. It was not my work when at Preston that had that effect on her that caused her to be nervously prostrated. It was her lovesick sentimentalism for a man in America, who has given up the truth. She expected he would write her, renewing his attentions to her, but no letter was received, and she almost blasphemed God?because of His providence. She would ask, “Why does God permit these things to be?” in such a spirit of vehemence and rebellion that I was frightened. Now the appearance is that poor Fannie has broken down in her work for Sr. White, as though I had worked her to death. This is not the truth, but such it will be regarded. Fannie has had her own way, and must suffer the result of her own course of action, but I must have the stigma, and the impression will go forth that poor Fannie is worked to death. I feel very sorry for the girl. I feel very sorry that she is suffering, but wrong impressions will be made in regard to my work.?{MR926 62.3}[210]
§423 《文稿》1896年62号第1页,(日记,1896年2月9日)—我今天有精疲力竭的感觉,对范妮的情况大感困惑。她想回来为我工作,但我感到这是不可能的。我不知道她有什么特别的改变使我敢信任她。可是我心中极其烦恼。我让她离开工作会感到完全清白吗?我在那个审判就位、审判展开的大日会准备好面对我采取这种做法的结果吗?{MR926 63.1}[211]
§424 Manuscript 62, 1896, p. 1. (Diary entry for February 9, 1896)—I have had feelings of exhaustion today, and not a little perplexity of mind over the case of Fannie. She wished to come back to work for me, but I have felt it impossible. I know not of any special change wrought in her that I dare trust her. And yet my mind is troubled exceedingly. Shall I feel altogether clear that I have divorced her from the work? Shall I be prepared to meet the result of this course of action on my part in that great day when the judgment shall sit and the books be opened??{MR926 63.1}[211]
§425 《文稿》1896年12d号,全文,(1896年3月19或20号)—我今天早上三点半就醒了。我像平时一样穿好衣服,祈求主的福气停留在我身上,将我的灵魂交给信实的造化之主上帝。我祈求圣灵全天与我同在,依照神圣的样式塑造和形成我的品格。我将自己交在上帝手中,作为我惟一能做的事。然后我开始在我的日记中写一些关于《约翰福音》15章,真葡萄树与枝子的事。{MR926 63.2}[212]
§426 Manuscript 12d, 1896, entire ms. (March 19[20?], 1896)—I awakened this morning at half past three. I dressed and as usual asked that the blessing of the Lord would rest upon me, committing my soul to God as unto a faithful creator. I asked that the Holy Spirit would be with me through the day, to mold and fashion my character after the divine similitude. I placed myself in the hands of God as the only thing I can do. Then I commenced writing in my diary some things in regard to?John 15, the true vine and the branches.?{MR926 63.2}[212]
§427 我在写作的时候不仅有了一次奇妙的经历,而且蒙引导确定我能本着良心并与耶稣基督同工采取的惟一做法,就是要接范妮回来参与我的工作,并且尽我这方面一切所能地拯救她的灵魂。这就会是在实行基督赐给我们的教训。我非常担心因没有顺从耶稣基督的话而得罪祂。{MR926 64.1}[213]
§428 While writing I had not only a wonderful experience, but was led to decide that the only course I can take conscientiously and be a co-worker with Jesus Christ, is to take Fannie back again to connect with my work, and do all on my part that I can to save her soul. This will be practicing the lessons that Christ has given us. I have a great fear of offending Jesus Christ by not obeying His words.?{MR926 64.1}[213]
§429 警告已赐给我。我与范妮分开是因为主已启示她是我的敌人,而且仇敌那时在藉着她行事,为要伤害我。她没有被赶走,而是像一只羊站在羊圈附近咩咩叫。我不知道我的将来,也不知道她的将来,但我会接受她的忏悔。我不会再不顾她要另一次试验的恳求。我不会就此去征求任何一个人的意见。我相信圣灵已告诉我这就是我应该做的。我有一项工作要为主去做。{MR926 64.2}[214]
§430 Warnings have been given me. I separated from Fannie because the Lord revealed that she was my adversary, and the enemy was working through her to injure me. She has not been driven off, but she stands like a sheep bleating about the fold. I know not my future, nor her future, but I will [accept] her confessions. I will not longer disregard her pleadings for another trial. I shall not in this go to anyone for advice. I believe the Holy Spirit has told me that this is what I should do. I have a work to do for the Master.?{MR926 64.2}[214]
§431 要是基督处在我的位置,祂会怎么做呢?祂会打开门欢迎她进入羊圈。我坚定地相信我的心今天早上已被圣灵动工,这似乎就是我必须做的事。并非我有什么证据认为范妮的品格有什么显著的改变,然而尽管如此,鉴于她对我的忏悔和她的恳求,我要照着我相信基督在这种情况下会做的行事。祂是宝贵的救主,对我来说非常宝贵,充满恩典与真理。我有什么权利向她关闭希望之门呢?{MR926 64.3}[215]
§432 What would Christ do were He in my place? He would open the door and welcome her to the fold. I firmly believe my mind has been worked this morning by the Holy Spirit, and it seems the very thing I must do. Not that I have any evidence to think that there is any marked change in Fannie’s character, but notwithstanding this, in view of her confessions to me, and her pleadings, I will act as I believe Christ would act under the circumstances. He, the precious Saviour, is very precious to me, full of grace and truth. What right have I to close the door of hope to her??{MR926 64.3}[215]
§433 范妮很恶劣地对待了我;她伤害了我的心灵。然而她若陷入撒但的网罗,要是她向我举手,我却不愿接受,就可能会有何等苦毒的指责临到我。我现在要毫不耽延地说:“范妮,我替基督听从你的请求,再次让你参与祂的工作。我不要求承诺。我所要求的一切就是你向自我死,并向耶稣基督活着。我没有进一步的劝告给你了。惟有祂是你的效能。不要看我或任何一个人。要注目于耶稣。注目上帝的羔羊,除去世人罪孽的。”{MR926 64.4}[216]
§434 Fannie has treated me badly; she has hurt my soul. But if she should fall into Satan’s snare, what bitter reflections might come to me if she had lifted her hand to me, and I would not take it. I shall now without delay say, “Fannie, I am, in Christ’s stead to heed your requests, and connect you again with His work. I do not ask for promises. All I ask is that you die to self, and live unto Jesus Christ. I have no further exhortation to give. He alone is your efficiency. Behold not me or any human being. Fix your eye upon Jesus. Behold the Lamb of God who taketh away the sin of the world.”?{MR926 64.4}[216]
§435 如果范妮愿意与上帝同行,将自己置之度外,接受和高举耶稣,与祂同负轭,她就能成为一位得胜者。我要承担全部责任,因为我不敢做别的。我要注意使她参加将要在库兰邦举行的聚会,并为她做点什么。我说不上要做什么或怎么做,但主会教导我的。{MR926 64.5}[217]
§436 If Fannie will walk with God, putting herself out of the question, but accepting and lifting up Jesus, yoking up with Him, she can be an overcomer. I shall take the whole responsibility, for I dare not do otherwise. I shall see that she attends the meeting to be held in Cooranbong, and make some way for her. I cannot tell just what or how, but the Lord will teach.?{MR926 64.5}[217]
§437 《文稿》1896年63号第3,5页,(日记,1896年3月19和3月22日)—[1896年3月19日:]我收到范妮一封来信,跟她之前写的很是一样。我虽然对她感到同情和悲伤,却不觉得我能再次与她联络。昨天我写了一些关于过去的事,关于我与考德威尔和某某曾有的经历。然后我在写关于《约翰福音》第十五章的内容:“我是真葡萄树,我父是栽培的人”(约15:1)。{MR926 64.6}[218]
§438 Manuscript 63, 1896, pp. 3, 5. (Diary entries for March 19 and March 22, 1896)—[March 19, 1896:] I have received a letter from Fannie Bolton, very much after the same that she has previously written. While I feel pity and sadness for her, I do not feel that I can again connect with her. Yesterday I wrote some things in reference to the past, in the experience I have had with Caldwell and -----. Then I was writing upon the fifteenth chapter of John: “I am the true Vine, and My Father is the Husbandman.”?{MR926 64.6}[218]
§439 我在写作的时候,一种天上的氛围弥漫了房间。我一生中有过许多次同样的经历。我对周围的一切失去了意识。我没有看到任何表号,任何人,却有一种交流临到我,好像有话说:{MR926 64.7}[219]
§440 As I was writing a heavenly atmosphere pervaded the room. I have had the same experience many times in my life. I lost all sense of everything around me. I saw no symbol, no person, but a communication was made to me as if words were spoken:?{MR926 64.7}[219]
§441 “范妮·博尔顿不在圣灵的管理之下。虽然她已证明自己不配参与你所从事的工作,但是要接她到你家里,对待这个可怜受骗的孩子如同一个需要帮助的人。她永远不能再参与这要本着基督全部的柔和谦卑前进的工作。她需要你多方面的帮助。要向她证明你原谅了她,如她所愿让她回到她的家。要当心参与你工作的人,因为你不可背负这种担子,但要作见证,证明你愿意帮助她来到耶稣面前悔改。要为她敞开来到我面前的门户,因为她所伤害所误表的是我。但是她如果愿意看到她在误表我已拣选你去做的工作上伤害和歪曲了我,我就愿意饶恕她以往的歪曲。”{MR926 64.8}[220]
§442 “Fannie Bolton is not under the ministration of the Holy Spirit. Although she has proved herself unworthy to be connected with the work in which you are engaged, yet take her to your home and treat the poor deceived child as one who needs help. She cannot ever be connected with the work?that is to go forth in all the meekness and lowliness of Christ. She needs your help in more ways than one. Testify to her that you pardon her, and let her return to her home as she desires. Be careful whom you connect with you in your work, for you must not carry such burdens, but bear testimony that you will help her to come to Jesus and repent. Open the door for her to come to Me, for it is I whom she has wounded and has misrepresented. But I will forgive her past falsifying if she will see it is I whom she has wounded and falsified in misrepresenting the work I have chosen you to do.”?{MR926 64.8}[220]
§443 我决定接范妮到家里与我们在一起并照顾她,尽管她已对我造成极大伤害,对我作了虚伪陈述,指责我的工作,给人留下了她制作了我的书籍的印象。她已向我忏悔,可是她却重申同样的错误言论。我要尽我所能地帮助这个可怜的人。{MR926 65.1}[221]
§444 I decided to take Fannie Bolton home with us and take care of her, although she has done me great injury, misstated me, cast reflection upon my work, and left the impression upon minds that she was the one who made my books. She has confessed to me and yet she repeats the same false statements. I shall do all I can to help the poor soul.?{MR926 65.1}[221]
§445 [1896年3月22日:]与范妮·博尔顿谈了话,打算接她到我家,看看改变是否会对她有益。{MR926 65.2}[222]
§446 [March 22, 1896:] Had talk with Fannie Bolton and proposed to take her to my home and see if a change will not do her good.?{MR926 65.2}[222]
§447 《文稿》1896年12c号,全篇文稿,(1896年4月1日,[书写日期是3月20日])—3月20日星期五,我起得很早,约在凌晨三点半起来。正当我写到《约翰福音》第15章时,突然间一种奇妙的平安临到我身上。整个房间好像充满着天国的气氛。似乎有圣洁庄严的一位临格我的房间。于是我放下手中的笔,静待那灵要对我说什么。我没看到任何人物,也没听到什么声音,但却有一位天上的守望者似乎站在我近旁。我觉得自己是在耶稣面前。我不可能说明或形容那似乎在我房间里的美好平安和亮光。一种庄严圣洁的气氛环绕着我,并有极其要紧的问题向我的心智和悟性呈现。行动的方针摆在我面前,好像那看不见的一位在对我讲话一般。我似乎完全忘了先前所写的东西,另有一项大事清晰地在我眼前展开。当这些大事深刻在我脑海时,一种极大的敬畏之心,便油然而生。{MR926 65.3}[223]
§448 Manuscript 12c, 1896, entire ms. (April 1, 1896, [March 20 dateline])—Friday, March 20, I arose early, about half past three o’clock in the morning. While writing upon the fifteenth chapter of John, suddenly a wonderful peace came upon me. The whole room seemed to be filled with the atmosphere of heaven. A holy, sacred presence seemed to be in my room. I laid down my pen and was in a waiting attitude to see what the Spirit would say unto me. I saw no person. I heard no audible voice, but a heavenly watcher seemed close beside me. I felt that I was in the presence of Jesus. The sweet peace and light which seemed to be in my room it is impossible for me to explain or describe. A sacred, holy atmosphere surrounded me, and there were presented to my mind and understanding matters of intense interest and importance. A line of action was laid out before me as if the unseen presence was speaking with me. The matter I had been writing upon seemed to be lost to my mind and another matter distinctly opened before me. A great awe seemed to be upon me as matters were imprinted upon my mind.?{MR926 65.3}[223]
§449 问题是:“你是怎样对待范妮·博尔顿的请求的呢?你与她分开没有错。你这么做是对的,这会使她知罪,产生她必须有的懊悔。她受了试探、欺骗,几乎被毁灭。尽管她性情乖张,我还是对她有怜悯和同情之念。她若愿意听从我的忠告,就会得救脱离撒但的网罗。撒但想要她的灵魂,以便筛她像筛麦子一样。你自己的心灵已受伤,但你的救主已用重价买了她。祂已受伤;祂被重新刺穿了,被这个受欺骗、被迷惑的孩子明明地羞辱了。{MR926 65.4}[224]
§450 The question was, What have you done with the request of Fannie Bolton? You have not erred in disconnecting with her, this was the right thing for you to do, and this would bring to her mind conviction and remorse which she must have. She has been tempted, deceived, and almost destroyed. Notwithstanding her perversity of spirit, I have thoughts of mercy and compassion for her. If she will heed my counsel she shall have deliverance from the snare of Satan. He has desired her soul that he might sift her as wheat. Your own soul has been wounded and bruised, but your Saviour has bought her with a great price. He has been wounded; He has been pierced afresh, and put to open shame by this deceived, deluded child.?{MR926 65.4}[224]
§451 “她已迷恋和听从了一个已远离我之人的声音[考德威尔]。此人没有行在光中,而是以一种虚伪的表现跟从另一个领袖。他是一个以自己为荣的人。对那些渴望在基督完全的品格中成长的人来说,与人熟识的安全纽带在于深信不疑地爱基督信基督超过一切。这是有力而安全的友谊与联合的纽带,决不会成为一个网罗。肉欲的熟人之间的关系需要严格把守。她以为会带给她安息、平安、幸福的那个人,会带来不安、悲伤、痛苦。她以为她所爱的那个人的影响,会使她对圣工失去兴趣,且会使她与上帝隔绝。她没有用她的行为和经验为我们救主基督的道理增光添色。主不会接受他作祂的代表,他的影响具有的性质已使她陷入一系列的经验,那些经验是每一个人都应该避免的。我的圣灵不停留在他身上。他不是一个蒙悦纳可以处理圣事的人。他不认识独一的真神和祂所差来的耶稣基督。他有机会和特权明白真理。要是他将真理用于他个人的情况,他原会拥有那种生发仁爱的信心,那种信心会净化他的心灵。他是在一种欺骗之下作工的。关于他的妻子和孩子,他有一项工作要做,他对他们是有责任的,上帝要他负责任。没有一个女人作为上帝的孩子有权利将自己的生活与他结合,因为这么做她就会犯通奸的罪。{MR926 65.5}[225]
§452 She has been enamored and listened to the voice of one [Caldwell] who is himself far from me. He is not walking in the light, but in a false show following another leader. He is a man that speaketh proud things of himself. The safe bond of all acquaintance for those who desire to grow up in Christ’s perfection of character is in confiding love and faith in Christ above all others. This is the strong and safe bond of friendship and union and will never become a snare. The relationship of fleshly acquaintances will need to be strictly guarded. The one whom she has thought would bring to her rest, peace, happiness, would bring?unrest, sorrow, anguish. The influence of the man whom she thought she loved would cause her to lose interest in the work, and has separated her from God. She has not adorned the doctrine of Christ our Saviour by her actions and experience. He will not accept as His representative the character of influence of him who has led her into a train of experiences that should be avoided by everyone. My Spirit does not rest upon him. He is not an acceptable man to handle sacred things. He does not know the only true God and Jesus Christ whom He has sent. He has had opportunities and privileges to understand the truth. Had he appropriated it to his individual case he would have possessed that faith that works by love and it would have purified his soul. He is working under a deception. He has a work to do in connection with his wife and with his children for which he is accountable and God holds him responsible. No woman has a right to connect her life with him as a child of God for in thus doing she will be guilty of the sin of adultery.?{MR926 65.5}[225]
§453 “要当心,免得撒但占据意念、意志和品格。‘你见自以为有智慧的人吗?愚昧人比他更有指望’(箴26:12)。我有一个警告给所有这样的人:‘不可行恶人的路’(箴4:14)。撒但为所有转离狭窄直路之人的脚铺设了网罗。福气却在那不站罪人道路之人的路上。‘你不要嫉妒恶人,也不要起意与他们相处;义人的路好像黎明的光’(箴24:1;4:18)。耶和华恨恶各种各样的伪装、欺骗和诡诈。人们可能外表看起来道貌岸然,却不将敬畏上帝摆在他们眼前。那些离开义路,去行在他们自己不圣洁判断的受骗的想象中的人,是在邪恶势力的控制之下。软弱犯错的人只要愿意接受忠告,就会得到帮助。{MR926 66.1}[226]
§454 Take heed lest Satan should take possession of mind and will and character. “Seest thou a man wise in his own conceit, there is more hope of a fool than of him.” I have a warning for all such, “Enter not into the path of the wicked.” Nets are laid by Satan for the feet of all who turn aside from the straight and narrow way. A blessing is upon the way of the man who has not stood in the way of sinners. “Be ye not envious of evil men, neither desire to be with them. The path of the just is as a shining light.” The Lord hates all manner of pretense and deception and fraud. Men may appear outwardly moral while the fear of God is not before their eyes. Those who leave the path of uprightness to walk in the deceived imagination of their own human unsanctified judgment are under the control of satanic agencies. If the weak and erring ones would only receive counsel they would be helped.?{MR926 66.1}[226]
§455 “使男人、女人或青少年拒绝忠告的感情是直接反对上帝的指示的。如果这些受骗的人听从了忠告,原会避免已经蒙蔽了他们二人的理智的属灵欺骗的状况。他们一直在进入试探,一直没有考虑与上帝所赐的忠告和警告一致。骄傲和自愿无知已使你们越来越远离圣道,远离耶和华如此说,远离上帝圣洁律法的原则,去随从自私、属地、属情欲的愿望,与上帝的诫命背道而驰。自我已被激怒,起来反抗可以安全听从的智慧之言。上帝的灵已因他们的心和悟性而担忧。任性固执已被定罪却不屈服,因为人是不圣洁的,不愿意行在主的道路上。{MR926 66.2}[227]
§456 The feelings which lead men, women or youth to reject advice is directly opposed to the instruction of God. If the advice had been heeded by these deceived souls, the condition of spiritual deception that has blinded the senses of both would have been avoided. There has been an entering into temptation. There has not been a consideration in harmony with the advice and warnings which God has given. Pride and willing ignorance has led you on and on away from the word, a thus saith the Lord, away from the principles of God’s holy law to selfish, earthly, sensual desires, walking contrary to the commandments of God. Self has risen up provoked against words wise and safe to follow. The Spirit of God has been grieved from their hearts and understanding. Headstrong obstinacy was convicted but unyielding, because the human agent is unsanctified and unwilling to walk in the way of the Lord.?{MR926 66.2}[227]
§457 “由于她强大的想象力,她的生活已因工作而被毁了将近一年。如有可能,就搀着这个可怜受迷惑者的手,以良好的影响包围她。她若现在与你分开,撒但的网罗就为她的脚预备好了。她没有处在可以任由她自己的状况。她感到后悔和懊悔。我是她的救赎主。她若不愿高抬、尊荣和荣耀她自己,我就会挽救她。她若现在离开你,就有一连串的环境会使她陷入困境,导致她的灭亡。{MR926 66.3}[228]
§458 Her life has been spoiled for the work for nearly a year by her strong imaginations. Take this poor deluded soul by the hand, surround her with a favorable influence if possible. If she separates now from you, Satan’s net is prepared for her feet. She is not in a condition to be left to herself now to be consumed of herself. She feels regret and remorse. I am her Redeemer, I will restore her if she will not exalt and honor and glorify herself. If she goes from you now there is a chain of circumstances which will bring her into difficulties which will be for her ruin.?{MR926 66.3}[228]
§459 “有些人没有上帝的爱常住心中。他们总是渴望一种感情用事的属地的爱,那种爱是不可能使一个献身服务上帝的人内心兴盛的。这类人会始终给予不需要的、会误导人的同情,在试探方面败坏别人的经验。他们多愁善感的不圣洁的爱情观是不文雅,不高尚,不令人满意的。它是自我的产物,完全出于人。你不要等待品格改变的证据。惟有圣灵才能做这种工作,依照那神圣的样式塑造和形成这个孩子的经验。若是撇下她自己,她就没有能力控制一种对她来说总是一个网罗的性情,除非她保持在上帝的爱中,除非她自卑,服在上帝的手下,天天学习基督的柔和谦卑。{MR926 66.4}[229]
§460 There are those who have not the love of God abiding in their hearts. They are craving ever for a sentimental earthly love which cannot possibly flourish in a heart consecrated to God’s service. This?class will ever give sympathy where it is not called for, where it will mislead, and pervert the experience of others in temptation. Their sentimental, unsanctified ideas of love are not refined, elevated or satisfying. It is a production of self and wholly human. You are not to wait for evidence of transformation of character. The Holy Spirit alone can do this work, and mould and fashion this child’s experience after the divine similitude. She has not power, if left to herself, to control a temperament that is always a snare to her unless that she keeps in the love of God, unless that she humble herself under the hand of God, and learns daily the meekness and lowliness of Christ.?{MR926 66.4}[229]
§461 “不要任由她去接受那些在基督徒的经验上并不明智之人危险的同情,他们不明白也不估计在测试和考验之下的人的灵魂的价值,这样的灵魂需要净化,脱离渣滓,如同在炉中受考验,以便出来的时候如同精金,没有了渣滓。上帝估量的并不是闪闪发光华而不实的东西,而是一种精炼的圣洁的人生,拥有一种圣化的生活,会使男男女女具有真正的道德价值。她唯一的希望在于默想耶稣基督的品格,从而丧失自我意识。由上帝之灵引导的真有辨识力的心会向自我死,会过在基督耶稣里的生活,会持守主的道路,而不会在上帝发来忠告和警告时顽梗地拒绝放弃自己的道路和自己的意愿。耶和华只能赐福顺从的人。要当心,不要转身离开所有向你伸出手的人。你应当帮助那些最需要帮助的人。我来不是召义人,而是召罪人悔改。撒但正设法胜过这些人,但我已为他们付出了生命的代价。{MR926 67.1}[230]
§462 Leave her not to the dangerous sympathies of those who are not wise in Christian experience, who do not understand and estimate the value of the human soul under test and trial, that need to be purified from the dross and tried as in a furnace that they may come forth free from dross as fine gold. It is not the glitter and the tinsel that is estimated of God, but it is a refined and holy life possessing a sanctified life that will make men and women of true moral worth. Her only hope is to lose her self-consciousness in the contemplation of the character of Jesus Christ. The true discerning heart led by the Spirit of God will die to self and will live its life in Christ Jesus. It will keep the way of the Lord. It will not stubbornly refuse to give up its way and its will when God shall send it counsels and warnings. The Lord can bless only the obedient. Take heed; all who reach up their hands to you turn not away. You are to help those who need help the most. I came not to call the righteous but sinners to repentance. Satan is trying to overcome these souls but they cost My life blood.?{MR926 67.1}[230]
§463 “她已被一种自以为是爱的感情冲昏了头脑,但这是一种总的来说太卑鄙的感情,不能以爱为名。它在欺骗和谎言的氛围中茁壮成长。这些乃是已经向我犯下的罪。我会再给她一次考验。”{MR926 67.2}[231]
§464 The mind has become infatuated by a sentiment thought to be love, but it is altogether too base a sentiment to bear the name of love. It flourishes in the atmosphere of deception and falsehood. These are the sins that have been committed against Me. I will give her another trial.?{MR926 67.2}[231]
§465 这个亮光是在恳切祈求圣灵指导、督责和安慰我之后临到我的。我把自己交在上帝手中,在写作的时候,这些事一直在我面前展开。我要立刻遵照所赐的这个亮光行事。这正像我们温柔、慈爱、同情的救主来提供鼓励。{MR926 67.3}[232]
§466 This light has come to me after earnestly praying that the Holy Spirit would instruct, reprove, and comfort me. I place myself in the hands of God, and while writing, these matters have been opened before me. I shall at once act upon this light given. It is just like our tender, loving, compassionate Saviour to hold out encouragement.?{MR926 67.3}[232]
§467 我听从了与范妮分开的警告。她是我的敌人,她是我的障碍。而今我接到命令要与耶稣基督合作,努力拯救这个灵魂。我没有求问任何一个人的意见。我不能再拖延,要将这个写出来,因为昨天晚上,3月31日,我所写的事更加感人地展现在我面前。我对这件事有了更好的了解,要相应地行事。我已把范妮·博尔顿接到我在库兰邦埃文代尔森尼赛德的家中。我要尽我所能地帮助她走向天国。{MR926 67.4}[233]
§468 I obeyed the warning to separate from Fannie. She was my adversary, she was a hindrance to me. And now the word comes to me to cooperate with Jesus Christ in the effort of the saving of a soul. I have had nothing to do in asking the advice of any one. I can no longer delay the writing of this, for last night, March 31, matters were opened before me more impressively which I write. I understand the matter better and shall work accordingly. I have taken Fannie to my home here at Sunnyside, Avondale, Cooranbong. I shall do all I can to help her heavenward.?{MR926 67.4}[233]
§469 《信函》1896年164号第1页,(致科利斯弟兄和姐妹,1896年4月6日)—我第一次讲话是在星期五晚上,我有很大的负担要跟考德威尔说话,将他的处境摆在他面前;于是会后我向他宣读了一些关于他自己和范妮的事。她目前在我家里,处在神经非常衰弱的状态。我很震惊,要是有什么人愿意给撒但一个机会,他就能怎样做人的思想工作,扭曲人的品格。这种情况会如何终止,我不知道。{MR926 67.5}[234]
§470 Letter 164, 1896, p. 1. (To Bro. and Sr. Corliss, April 6, 1896)—The very first time I spoke, on Friday morning, I had a very great burden to address Caldwell and set his position before him; then after meeting I read to him some things concerning himself and Fannie. She is now in my home in a very feeble nervous condition. I am astonished how Satan can work upon human minds and warp the character if any human being will give him a chance. How this case will terminate I know not.?{MR926 67.5}[234]
§471 《信函》1896年18号,第1-5,7页,(致考德威尔弟兄,1896年4月9日)—我回顾过去,以及上帝圣灵使我注意的事,就感到非常忧伤。考德威尔弟兄,我有一道明确的信息传给你。直到大约两年前,才有关于你和你家庭的特别亮光赐给我。那时我蒙指示看到,你在自己家庭生活中表现的态度不是基督徒。你通过接受伪安息日和欺骗开始婚姻生活。但一位靠着出卖真理原则得到的妻子并不能给买者带来平安和幸福。你在这事上的行为羞辱了上帝,祂的真理被践踏在尘埃中。{MR926 68.1}[235]
§472 Letter 18, 1896, pp. 1-5, 7. (To Bro. Caldwell, April 9, 1896)—I am greatly distressed as I review the past, and as matters are brought to my notice by the Spirit of God. I have a decided message to bear to you, Brother Caldwell. Special light in regard to you and your family was not given me until about two years ago. I was then shown that the attitude you manifested in your home life was unChristian. You began your married life by accepting a false sabbath, and by sailing under false colors. But a wife that was obtained by selling principles of truth, could not bring peace or happiness to the purchaser. God was dishonored by your action in this matter, and his truth was trampled in the dust.?{MR926 68.1}[235]
§473 你为你妻子放弃安息日,她便欢喜自己获得胜利,撒但也雀跃不已。但她既接受了一个甘愿为她卖主的男人,就不能仰望他尊敬他像妻子应该尊敬丈夫一样。她既在这种情况下与你结婚,便不区别属天的爱和属地的不是来自上帝的爱。一个为得到妻子而牺牲对天父之爱的人,也会为另一个女人出卖他的妻子。这种爱质量低劣,是属地的,决不会经得起考验和试炼。{MR926 68.2}[236]
§474 When you gave up the Sabbath for your wife, she rejoiced that she had gained a victory, and Satan also rejoiced. But when she accepted a man who was willing to sell his Lord for her, she could not look up to him and honor him as a wife should honor her husband. When she married you under these circumstances, she did not distinguish between a heaven-born love, and an earthly love, not of divine origin. A man who will sacrifice his love for his heavenly Father for a wife, will also sell his wife for another woman. This quality of love is base; it is of this earth, and will never bear the test of trial.?{MR926 68.2}[236]
§475 主并未修改祂政权的律法,这律法统管祂这世界和天上世界的国民。自然的律法必须顺从。但你却执意为得到你妻子而拆毁一切障碍,并因在安息日的事上屈服而违背了上帝的律法。你现在只是在收你所种的而已。{MR926 68.3}[237]
§476 The Lord does not revise the laws of His government, the laws which control His subjects both in this world and in the heavenly universe. Natural laws must be obeyed. But you were so determined to obtain your wife, that you broke down every barrier, and broke God’s law by yielding up the Sabbath; and you have been reaping only that which you have sown.?{MR926 68.3}[237]
§477 和你妻子结婚之后,你又接受了安息日。你若是出于真诚及敬畏上帝之心,这便是正确的行动。基督说:“有了我的命令又遵守的,这人就是爱我的;爱我的必蒙我父爱他,我也要爱他,并且要向他显现。”“人若爱我,就必遵守我的道;我父也必爱他,并且我们要到他那里去,与他同住”(约14:21,23)。{MR926 68.4}[238]
§478 After marrying your wife, you again accepted the Sabbath. This was the right move to make, if you made it in sincerity and in the fear of God. Said Christ, [John 14:21, 23?quoted.].?{MR926 68.4}[238]
§479 但你是许下了一个诺言才得到了你妻子,后来又违背了那个诺言。你为她付上了高昂的代价,你因自食其言,便使她完全有理由受试探。因而撒但利用一切机会来欺骗她,他将这事按他的看法呈现在她面前。你牺牲了真理,出卖了对上帝的忠贞,为要得到一个妻子,随后你又开始守安息日,你对待你妻子的方针原应完全异于以往。你原应当向她表现你婚前的温柔、忍耐和仁爱。但你没有这样做。你采取的做法不会保持她对你的爱。我个人不能相信你是基督徒,在目前情况下,我不能同意你加入任何教会。{MR926 68.5}[239]
§480 But you secured your wife under a promise which you afterwards broke. You paid a dear price for her, and by breaking your word, you have given her every reason to be tempted. Thus Satan has had every opportunity to deceive her, and he has presented this matter to her in his own light. You sacrificed the truth and sold your allegiance to God to obtain a wife, and after you again commenced keeping the Sabbath, your course toward your wife should have been entirely different from what it has been. You should have shown her all the tenderness, forbearance, and love which you manifested toward her before your marriage. But this was not done. You did not pursue a course which would keep her love. I myself cannot put confidence in you as a Christian, and under present developments, I could not give my consent for you to become a member of any church.?{MR926 68.5}[239]
§481 你曾想自己一旦结婚便可为所欲为。这使你的婚姻生活充满苦涩,你的妻子完全有理由拒绝离开她的家到这个国家来找你。你接受狂热盲信的观点对你一点儿都不利,且使你妻子有机会更加反对真理的原则。{MR926 68.6}[240]
§482 You thought that when you were once married, you could do as you pleased. This has embittered your married life; and your wife has had every reason for refusing to leave her home, and come to you to this country. Your acceptance of fanatical views was nothing in your favor, and gave your wife an opportunity to strengthen herself against the principles of truth.?{MR926 68.6}[240]
§483 你已离家多年,这给你的家庭带来了伤害。你告诉我你决不回家受辱。但主将这事显给我看。我知道除非你尽力与你妻子和好,你在上帝面前就不能清白。你在自己家中有一番必须完成的工作。去年九月我已向你说过这事。无论你妻子取何立场,无论她多么轻率、卤莽,这均不足以使你摆脱自己作父亲的责任。你应返回家中,竭尽全力修补裂痕,你虽自命相信真理,对家庭的伤害却比你妻子更大。{MR926 68.7}[241]
§484 For years you have been away from your home. Leaving as you did was a wrong against your family. You have told me that you would never humiliate yourself by going back, never; but the Lord has presented this matter before me. I know that you cannot be clear in the sight of God until you do all in your power to be reconciled to your wife. You have a work to do in your family which cannot be left undone. This I stated to you last September. Whatever position your wife has taken, whatever course of recklessness and levity she has?pursued, this does not excuse you from acting a father’s part to your children. You ought to go back to your home, and do all in your power to heal the breach, which you, a professed believer in the truth, have done more than your wife to make.?{MR926 68.7}[241]
§485 即使你妻子得到了离婚证书,你若对别的女子表现爱情,仍是犯了第七条诫命。然而你做了比这更恶劣的事。你在与你妻子离婚之前就已移情别恋,且对一个人说过:“和一个我不爱的女人绑在一起多么难过啊,其实有一位是我爱的,连她走过的地我都爱。”{MR926 69.1}[242]
§486 When you placed your love upon another woman [Fannie Bolton], even though your wife had obtained a divorce, you transgressed the seventh commandment; but you have done worse than this. You loved another women before your wife obtained a divorce, and you have said to one, “How hard it is to be bound to a woman I do not love, when there is one I love, yes, the very ground she walks on.”?{MR926 69.1}[242]
§487 你在我家期间的行为一点也不光明磊落。你和你寄托爱情的那一位之间的事一直是在欺骗和谎言之下进行的。你假借虚伪的藉口实行了隐密的计划。主将这些事显给我看,我试图改变事态,但救灵的负担在你和他人看来无足轻重。当时你正在负责查经,并在教会工作中担任要职。教会未就这项重要决定征询我的意见,否则我就不必忍受后来的痛苦了。{MR926 69.2}[243]
§488 Your course while in my family was not open and frank. The transactions between you and the one upon whom you placed your affections were carried on under falsehood and deception. In the guise of false pretension, secret plans were carried out. The Lord opened these matters before me, and I tried to change the order of things; but the burden of soul was to you and others accounted a thing of naught. At this time you were giving Bible readings, and taking a prominent part in church work. My advice and counsel was not asked in regard to this important decision. Had I been, I should have been spared much pain that followed.?{MR926 69.2}[243]
§489 我和你谈及你与年轻女子自由交往的事,并告诉你我去塔斯马尼亚期间不准你留在我家,你回答说你向来喜欢与姑娘们交往,从不认为有何危害。我告诉你我知道这种自由的危害,我外出期间一定不准你留在我家。{MR926 69.3}[244]
§490 When I talked with you in regard to your freedom in the company of young ladies, and told you that I could not have you in my family while I went to Tasmania, your answer was that you had always been sociable with young women, and had never thought that there was any harm in it. I told you that I knew there was harm in this freedom, and that I could not feel justified in leaving you in my family while I was absent.?{MR926 69.3}[244]
§491 我吩咐你不准留在我家之时,你说大约一周结清账目后就能走。但这事就此拖延下去,或者是忽略了,直到约两周前我们从塔斯马尼亚回来,然后在七月我们去了库兰邦。{MR926 69.4}[245]
§492 When I told you that you could not remain in my family, you said that after settling your accounts, which would take about a week, you could go. But this matter dragged along, or was neglected, till about two weeks before our return from Tasmania, and then in July we went to Cooranbong.?{MR926 69.4}[245]
§493 这事不能就此搁置。我不能让别人说是我妨碍你与家人团聚。我认为把你带到我家中完全是个错误。我这么做是为了帮你,但我不能让别人觉得我们认为你值得从事上帝赐给我的神圣工作。我不能让这事看起来是这样的,因为这会使我受到误解。{MR926 69.5}[246]
§494 This matter cannot rest here. I cannot be looked upon as keeping you from your home and family. It was a mistake, I think, to bring you into my family at all. I did this to help you; but I cannot let it be represented to others that we consider you a man worthy to engage in the sacred work which the Lord has given me. I cannot have this matter appear thus; for it places me in a wrong light.?{MR926 69.5}[246]
§495 我不能显得是要为你在婚姻生活中的行为辩护。你抛妻弃子是一件得罪上帝的事,我必须在你的区会会长威廉姆斯长老面前陈明此事的真相。我曾希望当你看到自己所受的欺骗时,你能悔改自己的行为,觉得自己需要生出那没有后悔的懊悔来。但我在阿马代尔的经历和在那里加给我的重担使我极其痛苦;你过去的生活已完全展现在我眼前。……{MR926 69.6}[247]
§496 I cannot appear to justify your course of action in your married life. Leaving your wife and family was an offense to God, and I must present this matter as it is, before the president of your Conference, Mr. Williams. I had hoped that when you saw your delusion you would feel that repentance for your course of action that needeth not to be repented of. But my experience at Armadale, and the burden brought upon me there, made me a great sufferer; and matters in regard to your past life have been more fully opened before me....?{MR926 69.6}[247]
§497 你曾认为自己会得到福音传道人的证书,但果真如此,上帝的圣工就要受辱。你装出一副受了错待的样子,但最受错待的是你妻子。她原本绝不应当受到你给她的待遇。你对待自己孩子的态度和行为使你妻子别无它法,只得与你疏远。她因你对自己孩子施以专横管制的刑罚而内心伤痛几至疯狂。{MR926 69.7}[248]
§498 You have thought that you would receive the credential of a minister of the gospel, but had these been given you, reproach would have been brought upon the cause of God. You have represented yourself as being a wronged man, but it is your wife who has been most wronged. She should never have been treated as you have treated her. You pursued such a course toward your little ones that your wife could not but be estranged from you. Her heart was wounded, bruised, and she was almost distracted by your overbearing, masterly government in discipline of your children.?{MR926 69.7}[248]
§499 放弃范妮之后你又移情别恋。这说明只要有机会你就会做什么。你对青年女子表示关怀,藉此获取芳心,因为只要你愿意,你就能显出非常亲切有魅力的样子。当这些事在我眼前经过时,我感到义愤填膺。我不能也不愿对这些事保持沉默。我决定要揭露你是一个没有原则的人。你对于何为基督徒的观念与上帝圣言中规定的原则相去甚远,因此凡与上帝圣工有关的责任一概不应托付给你。{MR926 69.8}[249]
§500 After giving up Fannie, you placed your affections upon?another. This shows just what you would do if opportunities presented themselves. You show young girls attention, and thus win their love; for if you choose, your manner can be very gracious and attractive. As these things have passed before me, I have felt indignant. I cannot, will not, keep silent on these matters. I determined that you should be unveiled as an unprincipled man. Your ideas of what a Christian should be are so much unlike the principles laid down in the word of God, that no responsibility in connection with the cause of God should be given you.?{MR926 69.8}[249]
§501 《信函》1896年104号,全信,(致I.N.威廉姆斯长老,宾夕法尼亚区会[考德威尔的家乡区会]会长,1896年4月12日)—我们为W.F.考德威尔弟兄心里十分烦恼。他想乘本月邮轮返回美国。他喜欢和年轻女子交往,并且乐此不疲,他的表现像个男孩。约一年前,在我儿子W.C.怀特建议下,我雇他给范妮·博尔顿作打字员,范妮念稿,他打字。但不久我便忧心忡忡。不断有警告传来。我和他本人交谈,就他喜欢与年轻女子交往及种种轻浮无聊的行为与他沟通,但他却说他向来喜欢和青年女士交往,从未想过有什么害处。我们想帮他,因他当时贫困潦倒,衣食无着。他颇具才干,本可善加利用,作W.C.怀特或我的得力助手。但我现在却不敢继续把他留在我家。{MR926 70.1}[250]
§502 Letter 104, 1896, entire letter. (To Eld. I. N. Williams, President of the Pennsylvania Conference [Caldwell’s home conference], April 12, 1896)—We have had great trouble of mind in regard to Bro. W. F. Caldwell, who expects to return to America by this month’s boat. He has shown a fondness for the society of young girls, and has been full of gaiety, conducting himself like a boy. About a year ago, at the suggestion of my son, W. C. White, I employed him to run the typewriter for [Fannie Bolton], as she read the manuscript to him. But soon I became burdened; warnings were given to me again and again. I talked with him by himself in regard to his freedom and enjoyment in the society of young women and his frivolous conduct, but he said he had always been sociable with young ladies, and thought it no harm. We wanted to help him; for he had no money, and but very poor clothing. He has good ability, and might have developed into a competent helper for W. C. or a worker for me; but I dared not have him remain a member of my family.?{MR926 70.1}[250]
§503 他迷恋上范妮。在他得知妻子与他离婚之前,他和范妮的事是在欺骗之下进行的。他听说妻子跟他离婚,似乎如释重负,因他心里早已完全抛弃他的妻子。然而主就这事赐我亮光。我认为他远比他妻子更应受责,因他宣称相信神圣的真理,而他妻子却未作这种表白。他一直不是一个仁慈温柔的丈夫;他既不忍耐,也不宽容,他妻子不论什么地方不如他意,他就非常专横挑剔。面对他这种气质和性情,我看不出他妻子如何能被引向真理。他妻子反对他,使他难堪,但这不比他对待他妻子的恶劣行为更难堪。他没有忍耐地或照基督徒所应该的去应付反对。他离开家庭、妻子和孩子乃是作恶。几个月前,我了解到,他一点没有赡养他们。{MR926 70.2}[251]
§504 He became attached to [Fannie], and the matter was carried on under a deception before he learned that his wife had obtained a divorce. When he heard this, he seemed greatly relieved; for his heart was fully weaned from her; but the Lord gave me light in regard to the matter. I consider that he is far more to blame than his wife in view of the fact that he claims to believe sacred truth, and she makes no such profession. He has not been a kind, tender husband; he has not been patient and forbearing, but very critical and overbearing if his wife displeased him in any way. I cannot see how his wife, in contact with his temperament and disposition, could feel drawn toward the truth. She has opposed him, and has made it hard for him, but not a whit harder than he has made it for her by his course of action. He has not taken opposition patiently, or as a Christian should. He did wrong when he left his home and his wife and children. A few months ago I learned that he had done nothing for their support.?{MR926 70.2}[251]
§505 当这些事情展现在我面前时,他最严重的问题是,他曾承诺要在有生之年珍惜爱护的妻子尚在人间,他却移情别恋。我们都一直不能理解他为何那么久离家在外,直到最近我得到了上帝的启示。{MR926 70.3}[252]
§506 As matters were unfolded to me, it was a most serious matter for him to allow his affections to center upon another woman when he had a wife living, whom he had promised to love and cherish as long as they both should live. Why he should leave his home so long has been a mystery to us all, until recently I have had divine enlightenment.?{MR926 70.3}[252]
§507 他能显得很有魅力,赢得姑娘的信任和青睐,但他一遇反对便显出一种脾气和性情,以致他若不改变,就没有任何女子,不论信与不信,能够与他和平相处。他采取的行径会使任何女性遭遇不幸。他在饮食上无节制,这就是他缺乏忍耐的原因。我感觉时候已到,我不应继续雇他为我办事,因为有关他行为的警告不断从主而来。如有必要,我会进一步写出此事。请照你所知道的将W.F.考德威尔在那里的家庭实况写信给我。你们若有能力,就要帮助考德威尔纠正这事,消除这事对上帝圣工的羞辱。即便他的妻子已经再婚,或许也有他可为自己的孩子作的事。{MR926 70.4}[253]
§508 He can appear very attractive, and win the confidence and favor of the girls, but when crossed, he has such a temper and disposition, that, unless he is changed, no woman, believer or unbeliever, could live peaceably with him. He would pursue a course that would make any woman miserable. He is an intemperate eater, and this is why he has so little patience. I felt that the time had come when I should no longer employ him to transact my business; for warnings kept coming to me from the Lord concerning his course of action. I will write further in regard to?this if necessary. Please write to me, stating facts concerning the family there, as far as you know. Help Caldwell, if you can, to set things right, and remove this reproach from the cause of God. Even if his wife is already married, it may be there is something he can do for his children.?{MR926 70.4}[253]
§509 《信函》1896年36号第2页,(致S.N.赫斯格,1896年4月26日)—星期四早晨,我约在两点钟早早起床,忙于著述有关真葡萄树的题目时,有如以前多次的经验,我又感受到有一位临格在我房间,也忘了先前所做的事。我似乎是在耶稣面前。祂正将所要指示我的传达给我。一切都那么清晰,使我不致误解。我要去帮助一个我原以为决不该再要我去为之费心的人[范妮·博尔顿?]。我不明白这是什么意思,但立刻决定不设法推想这事,而是遵行指示。主没有对我的耳朵讲一句可听见的话,而是对我的头脑讲的。我说:“主啊,我会照祢所吩咐的去做。”{MR926 71.1}[254]
§510 Letter 36, 1896, p. 2. (To S. N. Haskell, April 26, 1896)—I arose early Thursday morning, about two o’clock, and was writing busily upon the True Vine, when I felt a presence in my room, as I have many times before, and I lost all recollection of what I was about. I seemed to be in the presence of Jesus. He was communicating to me that in which I was to be instructed. Everything was so plain that I could not misunderstand. I was to help one [Fannie Bolton?] whom I thought I should never be called upon to be troubled with again. I could not understand what it meant, but at once decided not to try to reason about this, but follow the directions. Not an audible word was spoken to my ear, but to my mind. I said, “Lord, I will do as Thou hast commanded.”?{MR926 71.1}[254]
§511 《信函》1896年52b号第4页,(致英斯姐妹,1896年5月7日)—范妮的健康状况不行了,她今天离开我们去美国。{MR926 71.2}[255]
§512 Letter 52b, 1896, p. 4. (To Sister Ings, May 7, 1896)—Fannie’s health has failed, and she leaves us today for America.?{MR926 71.2}[255]
§513 《信函》1896年87a号第2页,(致奥尔森长老,1896年5月25日)—范妮·博尔顿现在离开了我们。伯纳姆姐妹和玛丽安与我在一起,还有玛吉·黑尔姐妹,我们委托她为期刊预备文章,她有希望成为一位好工人。我刚刚雇用了明妮·霍金斯,她长期在《回声》出版社工作,了解打字机,懂速记,我们希望她能预备副本。她像玛吉·黑尔一样年轻又健康。她们不像范妮·博尔顿有一种神经质的性情,而会给工作带来健康的影响。如果成圣归于上帝,她们就会做得不错。{MR926 72.1}[256]
§514 Letter 87a, 1896, p. 2. (To Elder Olsen, May 25, 1896)—Fannie Bolton has now left us. Sister Burnham and Marian are with me, also Sister Maggie Hare, whom we are entrusting with articles to prepare for the paper, and who gives promise of becoming a good worker. I have just engaged Minnie Hawkins, who has been long in the Echo Office, who understands the typewriter, has some knowledge of short-hand, and we hope may be able to assist in preparing copy. Like Maggie Hare she is young and healthy. They have not a nervous temperament like Fannie Bolton, but will bring a healthful current into the work. If sanctified to God, they will do a good work.?{MR926 72.1}[256]
§515 《信函》1896年153号第1页,(致“孩子们”,1896年7月9日)—玛吉·黑尔是一个优秀的姑娘,正在取代范妮为期刊提供文章。玛吉与范妮正相反,范妮紧张不安的举动几乎使那些与她同工的人疯狂。但我现在自由了,希望她与我之间保持八千英里水路的距离。她总是烦躁不安,使别人紧张不安。{MR926 72.2}[257]
§516 Letter 153, 1896, p. 1. (To “Children,” July 9, 1896)—Maggie Hare is an excellent girl and is taking the place Fannie occupied in furnishing the paper with articles. Maggie is the very opposite of Fannie, who would nearly make those who worked with her wild with her nervous movements. But I am now free and shall hope to keep eight thousand miles of water between her and me. She was always in a fidget and made others nervous.?{MR926 72.2}[257]
§517 《信函》1896年154号第1,2页,(致“孩子们,”1896年8月2日)—范妮让我失望,她自从来到澳大利亚,对我就一直是一个沉重的负担。她四月份离开我回美国去了,她告诉我她想要再回来。我告诉她我在这方面没有亮光说一句鼓励的话。她怂恿我说要是她愿意支付自己的路费,她就可以回来。我不能这么做。还有,爱德森,我决不想让她再参加我的工作了。她会跟我的工人们谈话,尤其是玛丽安,并且煽动她,以致我几乎难以与玛丽安相处。她那时就像另一个人,充满一种兴奋难解的精神。现在范妮走了,玛丽安又是她自己了,像她素常那样平和了。现在工人们是健全、健康、仁慈、对我来说有价值的。{MR926 72.3}[258]
§518 Letter 154, 1896, pp. 1, 2. (To “Children,” August 2, 1896)—Fannie failed me and she has been?a great tax to me since she came to Australia. She left me for America in April, and she told me she wished to come back again. I told her I had no light to say one word of encouragement in this line. She urged me to say she might come back if she would pay her own fare. I could not do this. And, Edson, I never want her connected with me again. She would talk to my workers, especially Marian and get her stirred up so that I could hardly get along with Marian. She was like another person, infused with a spirit that was excitable and unexplainable. Now Fannie is gone, she is herself, just as peaceable as she used to be. The workers now are wholesome, healthy, and kind, and of value to me.?{MR926 72.3}[258]
§519 《文稿》1897年29号第5页,(“劝勉和警告,”1897年4月6日)—我很渴望麦卡拉弟兄会受益于这些聚会[在库兰邦];因为一些事已清楚地呈现在我面前,我知道他处在危险中。我知道他的头脑处在强烈的试探之下。他跟他妻子谈了这些事,他们一起使在悉尼郊区的各教会处于一种局面,会产生一种他们不愿收到仓中的结果。麦卡拉姐妹的传道探访和麦卡拉弟兄的影响会阻碍已花了那么多的财力人力为要完成的工作。范妮·博尔顿那些非常不真实的言论在他们心中就像撒下的种子,产生了恶果。{MR926 73.1}[259]
§520 Manuscript 29, 1897, p. 5. (“Counsel and Warning,” April 6, 1897)—I was very desirous that Bro. McCullagh should have all the benefit possible from these meetings [in Cooranbong]; for matters had been presented before me so clearly that I knew that he was in danger. I knew that his mind was under strong temptation. He talked these things to his wife, and together they were causing in the churches in the suburbs of Sydney, a state of things which would produce a harvest that would not be pleasant to garner. Sr. McCullagh’s missionary visits and Bro. McCullagh’s influence tended to counteract the work for the accomplishment of which so much money and labor has been expended. And Fannie Bolton’s statements, which were cruelly untrue, were as seed sown in their minds, to produce fruit.?{MR926 73.1}[259]
§521 《信函》1897年25号,全信(致范妮·博尔顿,1897年4月11日)—你在澳大利亚这里做的事已产生广泛影响。你否认对马尔科姆姐妹说过他们告诉我并且坚持说你说过的话。你后来访问了马尔科姆姐妹,否认你曾说过怀姐妹是一个很无知的女人,不能写作,她的著作全都得你来写,正是你投入这工作中的才干才使那些文章在期刊和书籍中发表。我的做法只是多次解雇你。你还在普雷斯顿在我家的时候我曾这么做过;然而因为你表面上的悔改,我愚蠢地同意让你再次与我同工。{MR926 73.2}[260]
§522 Letter 25, 1897, entire letter. (To Fannie Bolton, April 11, 1897)—The work which you have done here in Australia has yielded a harvest which is widespread. You denied having said to Sr. Malcolm that which they told me, and insisted upon, you had said. You afterward visited Sister Malcolm, and denied having said that Sr. White was a very ignorant woman, who could not write, and whose writings you had to make all over, and that it was your talent in connection with the work that made the articles in the papers and books what they were. My only course has been to dismiss you from my employment several times. I did this while you were at my home at Preston; but because of your apparent repentance, I foolishly consented to let you work with me again.?{MR926 73.2}[260]
§523 后来在布莱顿帐篷大会上,我们得到了那个很长的令人沮丧的启示,就是你认为玛丽安和你自己应该被公认为在将才干投入我作品中的人。我与科尔科德姐妹和索尔兹伯里姐妹谈过一次话,那时我对她们讲了我因你就你从事我著作的工作扭曲事实而经历的烦恼。这两位姐妹告诉我,你曾告诉她们同样的故事。你还将之告诉了米勒姐妹。马尔科姆姐妹告诉我的你对她讲过的话,你又对科尔科德姐妹讲了。起先米勒姐妹说你没有对她讲过什么;但索尔兹伯里姐妹说:“我听到范妮对你说了这些话,”(重述你曾对马尔科姆姐妹讲过的话)。然后米勒姐妹说她忘了,但现在想起来你曾说过的话了。这些话绝对是不真实的,由于你的报告,米勒姐妹又将之告诉了安德森一家。我得知你还向别人讲了同样的话。你声称是你那上好的才干才成就了那些文章。我知道这是一个谎言;因为我了解我自己的著作。你自己采用了其中的许多内容,将之交织在你自己的文章中,我看出来了。{MR926 73.3}[261]
§524 Then after the Brighton camp meeting we had that long, soul-disheartening revelation made to us that you thought that Marian and yourself should be recognized as the ones [who] were putting talent into my works. I had a talk with Srs. Colcord and Salisbury, when I related to them the trouble I had experienced with your perversion of facts in regard to your work on my writings. These sisters told me that you had told them the same story. You also told it to Sr. Miller. The same words which Sr. Malcolm told me you had said to her, you repeated to Sr. Colcord. At first Sr. Miller said you had said nothing to her; but Sr. Salisbury said, “I heard Fannie say these words to you,” (repeating what you had told Sister Malcolm). Sr. Miller then said that she had?forgotten, but now remembered what you had said. Now these words were positively untrue, and as the result of your report, Sister Miller has repeated them to the Andersons. You have also, I learn, repeated the same to others. You claimed that it was your superior talent that made the articles what they were. I know this to be a falsehood; for I know my own writings. You yourself have adopted much of them, and interwoven them with your own articles, which I recognize.?{MR926 73.3}[261]
§525 在你向麦卡拉弟兄作的失实陈述中,我又遇到了这种事。我始终像对我自己的孩子一样温柔地对待了麦卡拉弟兄和他的妻子。然而酵已起了作用,他和他妻子的谈论已在悉尼的教会造成大害。{MR926 74.1}[262]
§526 I have met this again in the work you have done in your misrepresentations to Bro. McCullagh. I ever treated Bro. McCullagh and his wife as tenderly as I would my own children. But the leaven has been at work, and the talk of him and his wife has done great harm in the church in Sydney.?{MR926 74.1}[262]
§527 主在北海岸给了我指示之后,我就照着祂告诉我的去做了。我将你从麦卡拉弟兄家接回来,为你做了我一切力所能及的事,尽管我说不出这种举动意味着什么。然而你在澳大利亚的影响,你传播虚假言论反对我,我再三蒙指示看见你是我的敌人,在行事反对我。为什么我蒙指示接你到我家,我不知道。但主了解一切,我现在不知道的,我以后会知道。{MR926 74.2}[263]
§528 After the instruction given me of the Lord at North Shore, I did just what He told me to do. I took you from Bro. McCullagh’s and did all in my power for you, although I could not tell what such a movement meant. But in your influence in Australia, in bearing false statements against me, I have been repeatedly shown that you were my adversary working against me. Why I was directed to take you to my home, I do not know. But the Lord understands all about that, and that which I do not know now, I shall know hereafter.?{MR926 74.2}[263]
§529 在阿德莱德的工作交给麦卡拉弟兄和霍金斯弟兄去完成,我也以为完成了。麦卡拉弟兄在很大程度上放弃了真理,还带着霍金斯弟兄与他一起放弃。整个教会都跟着他们走了,然而当这两个弟兄递交辞呈,说他们不相信怀夫人的异象或使命时,教会没有全都支持他们。{MR926 74.3}[264]
§530 The work in Adelaide was left for Brn. McCullagh and Hawkins to finish, and I think it was a finish. Bro. McCullagh has given up the truth largely, and taken Bro. Hawkins with him. The whole church had gone with them, but had not fully taken sides when these brethren sent in their resignation, saying that they did not believe in Mrs. White’s visions or mission.?{MR926 74.3}[264]
§531 这将丹尼尔斯弟兄和科尔科德弟兄叫到了阿德莱德。他们一到达那里,就发现麦卡拉和霍金斯已指定了一次聚会,他们在会上发表了针对我的长篇攻击性演说。麦卡拉弟兄挨家挨户传播了你给他的消息,说我在出版声称是出自我笔下的书籍方面做的非常少,说我从其它书籍中挑出我所写的一切,而那些预备我文章的人,尤其是你自己,制作了那些材料发表。这就是你成为我仇敌的方式。{MR926 74.4}[265]
§532 This called Brn. Daniells and Colcord to Adelaide. On arriving there, they found that McCullagh and Hawkins had appointed a meeting, where they made their tirade upon me. Bro. McCullagh has reported your words of information given him from house to house, saying that I have very little to do in getting out the books purported to come from my pen, that I had picked out all I had written from other books, and that those who prepared my articles, yourself in particular, made that matter that was published. This is the way you became my adversary.?{MR926 74.4}[265]
§533 当科尔科德弟兄和丹尼尔斯弟兄挨家挨户探访时,他们听到了同样的话。在麦卡拉弟兄指定的聚会上,他说他不会说什么反对复临信徒的话;但凡尼尔斯弟兄和科尔科德弟兄在场,听到他在信徒和非信徒面前公开发表了类似的言论。丹尼尔斯弟兄问他是否可以说几句,但是他们断然拒绝让他讲话。于是他递给麦卡拉弟兄一个通知,大意是他会在下个星期一晚上评论这些言论,并请他们阅览。麦卡拉弟兄将它递给了霍金斯弟兄,然而因为人们正在离开,丹尼尔斯弟兄就起身亲自宣读了那个通知,并说他已请这些传道人阅读它,他们却拒绝这么做。霍金斯弟兄说:“我打算读,但你没有给我时间。”然而人们已经在出去,一些人已经走了。{MR926 74.5}[266]
§534 When Brn. Colcord and Daniells visited from house to house, they met these very same statements. In the meeting appointed by Bro. McCullagh, he said he would have nothing to say against Adventists; but Brn. Daniells and Colcord were present, and heard him make similar statements in public, before believers and unbelievers. Bro. Daniells asked if he could make a few remarks, but they positively refused to let him speak. Then he handed McCullagh a notice to the effect that he would review these statements the following Monday evening, and asked them to read it. Bro. McCullagh handed it to Bro. Hawkins, but as the people were leaving the house, Bro. Daniells arose and read the notice himself, remarking that he had asked these ministers to read it, and they had refused to do so. Bro. Hawkins said, “I was going to read it, but you did not give me time.” But already the people were passing out, and some had gone.?{MR926 74.5}[266]
§535 局面就是这样。你可以由此看出你那谎言与歪曲事实的酵产生了怎样的结果。你把你的意见告诉了麦卡拉弟兄和姐妹,改变了他们对我的感情。酵起了作用,直到感染了整个教会。然而感谢上帝,他们得到了恢复。而今我的道路很清晰,要应对出自你的言论,我要尽一切可能断绝你话语的影响。{MR926 74.6}[267]
§536 Now, this is the state of things. You can see by this what a harvest your leaven of falsehood and misrepresentation have produced. You opened your mind to Bro. and Sister McCullagh, which has changed their feeling toward me. The leaven worked, until it carried with it one whole church. But thank God they are recovered. And now my way is clear to make statements just as they have been coming from you, and I will cut off the influence of your tongue in every way that I can.?{MR926 74.6}[267]
§537 我要说,你在澳大利亚的大部分时间都确实不知道自己出于怎样的精神。撒但的代表一直在藉着范妮·博尔顿作工。我再三告诉玛丽安,当我将某篇文章放在你手中时,似乎就有一只手伸在你我之间,多年来一直如此。我现在能明白这一切的事了,因为别人已来向我忏悔。我现在知道可以拿出证据表明每一篇发表到期刊上的文章都不能被声称为范妮·博尔顿的想法,范妮·博尔顿的观念。{MR926 75.1}[268]
§538 I will say that much of the time that you were in Australia, you surely did not know what manner of spirit you were of. Satanic agencies have been working through Fannie Bolton. Again and again I told Marian for years as I have been placing some article in your hands, there seemed to be a hand stretched out between you and me. I can understand all about matters now as others have come to me with confessions. I know now that proof can be given that every article coming in the paper cannot be claimed as Fannie Bolton’s ideas, Fannie Bolton’s sentiments.?{MR926 75.1}[268]
§539 你询问如果你恢复了健康,能否再回来与我同工。我从主得到的亮光是:“她没有归正。她没有力量阻止撒但支使她的头脑高抬自我,发表虚假言论以便得到称赞。你已做了你所能做的一切。她所撒的种子会结出恶果。”{MR926 75.2}[269]
§540 You asked if you could come back again and connect with me in my work, if you should regain your health. The light I have from the Lord is: “She is not converted. She has no power to prevent Satan from working with her mind to exalt self, and make statements that are false in order to receive praise. You have done all that you could do. The seed that she has sown will bear its harvest.”?{MR926 75.2}[269]
§541 我蒙指示看到藉着你来到我家,主愿意给你一个机会清除你的心灵与我和我的工作有关的罪疚感。你的言语已使别人产生了会再传给别人的想法。然而已给了你机会做正直彻底的工作,洁净你的心灵,使你曾对他们讲过话的那些人对我有清楚正确的看法,显明你曾行事作我的对头。上帝赐给我的亮光是,主的旨意并不是今后你应该在任何时间与我和上帝赐给我去做的工作有丝毫关系。难道我要被迫公布这件事,以便根除这种影响吗?范妮呀,关于决不将我写的文章交一页在你手里,我的心已永远安定了。我在接你到我家里时没有后悔,因为是主的计划。我现在能更加清楚地看到原因了。愿主怜悯你拯救你。我为你感到难过,确实难过,愿意做任何事以便拯救你的灵魂。{MR926 75.3}[270]
§542 I was shown that by your coming to my home, the Lord would give you an opportunity to clear your soul of its guiltiness in connection with me and my work. Your words had created, in others, ideas that would be communicated to still others. But the opportunity was granted you to make straight and thorough work, to clear your soul, and place me in a clear and proper light before the people to whom you had spoken. You had acted as my adversary, and the light given me of God is that it was not the will of the Lord henceforth that you should have the least connection at any time with me and the work which God had given me to do. Shall I be compelled to publish this matter, in order to uproot this influence? My mind is forever settled, Fannie, in regard to having one page of my written articles go into your hands. I do not regret taking you into my home when I did, because it was the Lord’s plan. I can see the reasons more clearly now. May the Lord pity and save you. I am sorry for you, indeed I am, and would do anything to save your soul.?{MR926 75.3}[270]
§543 我感谢主我有两个很好编辑——玛吉·黑尔和明妮·霍金斯。她们在做很好的工作。从她们手中出来的著作带有我自己的想法,我知道。现在是谁制作文章呢?人人都能看清那些文章像以往一样充满圣经真理。你的“灵感”没有接触那些文章,只要我活着,你的“灵感”就决不会再接触我的文章。我的文章非但不带有你的想法,你的文章反而有主已赐给我的想法。你将它们嫁接到范妮·博尔顿的树干上了。我不希望你受到伤害;但我不会保持沉默。只要我能阻止,就不会让你的失实陈述误导别人。{MR926 75.4}[271]
§544 I thank the Lord that I have two good editors in Maggie Hare and Minnie Hawkins. They are doing good work. The writings come from their hands with my own ideas, and I know it. Who makes the articles now? All can see that they are just as full of Bible truth as they have ever been. Your “inspiration” has not touched them, and never will again as long as I shall live. In the place of my articles bearing your ideas, your articles have the ideas that the Lord has given me. You have grafted them into Fannie Bolton’s stock. I wish you no harm; but I will not keep quiet. Your misrepresentation shall not mislead other minds, if I can possibly prevent them.?{MR926 75.4}[271]
§545 《信函》1897年1号第2页,(致“在阿德莱德的教会,”1897年4月22日)—我这次只能给你们写一点儿。我有许多东西要写,好完成《基督生平》(《历代愿望》),我常被叫走以致只有很少的时间写作。可是我非常痛心地看到一些曾拥有亮光和真理的人,那么快就受撒但迷惑,迷恋于一种虚伪的圣洁,像范妮·博尔顿一样,她在受欺骗时,声称自己是受上帝默示的。人们何时离开主所设立的路标,就会迷失方向。这些路标使我们明白了我们由预言所显明的立场。{MR926 75.5}[272]
§546 Letter 1, 1897, p. 2. (To “The Church in Adelaide,” April 22, 1897)—I can write but little to you now at this time. I have very much writing to do to complete the “Life of Christ,” and I have been called away so much that I have but little time to write. But my soul is made very sad to see how quickly those who have had light and truth will accept the deceptions of Satan, and be charmed with a spurious holiness, like Fannie Bolton, who in the midst of her deceiving, claimed that she was inspired of God. When men turn away from the waymarks the Lord has established, that we may understand our position as marked out in prophecy, they are going they know not whither.?{MR926 75.5}[272]
§547 《信函》1897年24号,全信,(致范妮·博尔顿,1897年6月25日)—昨天有人叫我注意你现在发表在《评论与通讯》上的文章。[见《评论与通讯》1897年4月13至5月11日]。我有段时间没有阅读期刊上的任何一篇文章了;因为我一直很忙。然而当我阅读这些文章时,就想你将麦肯齐家的事登在《评论与通讯》上乃是一件错事。难道你认为你写出关于一个你曾与之有关系的家庭的这种作品是对的吗?要是那个家庭的人阅读我们的教会的期刊,你认为这会意味着使人归正还是毁灭人呢?{MR926 76.1}[273]
§548 Letter 24, 1897, entire letter. (To Fannie Bolton, June 25, 1897)—Yesterday my attention was called to your articles now going through the Review. [See?The Review and Herald, April 13—May 11, 1897.] I have not read any articles in the papers for some time; for I have been so thoroughly employed. But as I read these articles, I thought it a very wrong thing for you to put in the Review the history of the McKenzie family. Did you think that such productions from your pen concerning a family with whom you had been connected, were right? If that family reads our church paper, think you will it be the means of converting or destroying??{MR926 76.1}[273]
§549 你的表现很容易被认出来。你将麦肯齐一家置于最不利的角度。难道这要成为你发表在期刊上的所有文章的基调吗?人人都能轻易看出被安置在完美顶峰的阿什伯里小姐是范妮·博尔顿小姐用来展示自己的一个方式。当我这些文章时,我为你感到悲伤羞耻,过于我所能表达的。要是你用漫画手法如此生动的描绘你自己在巴特尔克里克和澳大利亚的历史,栩栩如生地描绘事情,像你对麦肯齐一家做的这样,我们就会有一些最惊人的文章了。然而这种作品不应该藉着出版印行得以长存。你肯定在做你不会喜欢让任何一个人对你做的事。{MR926 76.2}[274]
§550 Your representations can be easily recognized. You place in the worst light the McKenzie family. Is this to be the tone of all the articles you put into the paper? All can easily see that Miss Ashbury, who is placed on the pinnacle of perfection, is a revelation of the way in which Miss Fannie Bolton regards herself. As I read these articles I was more distressed for you and ashamed of you than I can express. Should you caricature so vividly your own history while you were in Battle Creek and Australia, putting things in as vivid a light as you have regarding the McKenzie family, we would have some most striking articles. But such productions should not be immortalized by being put in print. You are certainly doing as you would not be pleased to have anyone do by you.?{MR926 76.2}[274]
§551 那段历史肯定会被放在麦肯齐一家手中。看到你以最恶劣的眼光描绘他们的家庭秘密,会对他们有哪种影响呢?“你要写信给撒狄教会的使者,说:‘那有上帝的七灵和七星的,说:我知道你的行为,按名你是活的,其实是死的。你要警醒,坚固那剩下将要衰微(原文作死)的;因我见你的行为,在我上帝面前,没有一样是完全的。所以要回想你是怎样领受、怎样听见的、又要遵守,并要悔改。若不警醒,我必临到你那里,如同贼一样。我几时临到,你也决不能知道。……我知道你的行为,你也不冷也不热;我巴不得你或冷或热。你既如温水,也不冷也不热,所以我必从我口中把你吐出去。你说:我是富足,已经发了财,一样都不缺;却不知道你是那困苦、可怜、贫穷、瞎眼、赤身的。我劝你向我买火炼的金子,叫你富足;又买白衣穿上,叫你赤身的羞耻不露出来;又买眼药擦你的眼睛,使你能看见”(启3:1-3,15-18)。{MR926 76.3}[275]
§552 That history will certainly be placed in the hands of the McKenzie family. What kind of an influence will it have upon them to see that you have represented family secrets in the very worst light? [Revelation 3:1-3, 15-18quoted.]?{MR926 76.3}[275]
§553 凡熟悉你在澳大利亚的历史的人会厌恶你对自己的描绘。而这就是那个表示自己不愿处理关于督责的私人证言的人。可是没有上帝的任何任命,你就抓住一个家庭,以极其夸张的手法暴露你曾在那个家庭耳闻目睹的事。你怎么能做这种事呢?我非常震惊你竟敢这么做。你一直很害怕有什么关于你自己的事传到美国,哪怕传到我儿子爱德森那里。{MR926 77.1}[276]
§554 All who are acquainted with your history in Australia will be nauseated by your representation of yourself. And this is the one that expressed herself as having an unwillingness to handle private testimonies of reproof. Yet without any appointment of God, you take hold of a family, and lay bare the things you have seen and heard in that family, in a most exaggerated light. How could you ever do such a thing? I am very much astonished that you should dare to do it. You have been very much afraid to have anything go to America, even to my son Edson, in regard to yourself.?{MR926 77.1}[276]
§555 非常遗憾,这个非常出色的女基督徒,如此温和,具有如此优秀的判断力,当她在我家里,与我联络的时候,竟然没能显出这么美好的品格。当你以为艾米丽·坎贝尔犯了一个错误,其实犯错的无疑是你时,你对她说的话有多么温和,像基督呢?如果这些事被描绘成故事并且向世界发表,会相当轰动的。你是什么意思呢?你的心理不平衡吗?如果这样,为了基督的缘故,不要藉着让人人都知道来惊人地证明这个事实。{MR926 77.2}[277]
§556 It is a great pity that this very wonderful Christian woman, so mild, of such excellent judgment, could not have revealed her character in such beautiful lines when in my family, connected with me. How mild and Christlike were your words to Emily Campbell, when you supposed her to be making a mistake, but when you yourself were doubly at fault? If these things were represented in a story and given to the world, it would be quite sensational. What do you mean? Are you unbalanced in mind? If so, for Christ’s sake do not make striking proof of the fact by letting everyone know that it is so.?{MR926 77.2}[277]
§557 坦尼弟兄的洞察力怎么能被蒙蔽,竟然接受出自你笔下的这种文章,我无法想象。你若是想要写耸人听闻的小说,就将你的文章投到会赏识这种内容的期刊上吧。要停下来想想你在做什么。{MR926 77.3}[278]
§558 What could have beclouded Bro. Tenney’s perceptive faculties, to lead him to accept such articles from your hand, I cannot conceive. If you want to write sensational novels, put your articles in papers that will appreciate such matter. Do stop and think what you are about.?{MR926 77.3}[278]
§559 我寄给你这些出于责任感而写的内容。不要展示这种穿着天使衣服的范妮·博尔顿,因为这不是我们所熟悉的范妮·博尔顿。我劝你让你疲惫的大脑完全休息,同时做某种除了写作以外的工作。你说过你喜欢做家务。为什么不做些这种工作,使用你身上的肌肉,与你的用脑相称呢?难道你不能满足于以这种方式使用你的才干吗?我劝你这么做,看看你能不能在思想和品格上成为一名基督徒。{MR926 77.4}[279]
§560 I send you this matter, written from a sense of duty. Do not exhibit Fannie Bolton in such angel’s garments, because it is not the Fannie Bolton we are acquainted with. I advise you to let your tired brain have entire rest, while you do some kind of work besides writing. You said that you loved to do housework. Why not do something of this kind, using the muscles of your body in proportion as you have used your mind. Cannot you be satisfied to use your talents in this way? I advise you to do this, and see if you cannot become a Christian in thought and in character.?{MR926 77.4}[279]
§561 我希望并祈愿你的过犯可以得到赦免。我恳求你不要在世人面前炫耀那些造成的伤害不及你所造成的伤害的百分之一之人的历史。你若曾真正感觉到这种状况,你就会意识到自己的邪恶行径,以致决不会在从你自己的眼睛里除掉梁木之前,设法从你弟兄或姐妹的眼中除掉一根刺。{MR926 77.5}[280]
§562 I hope and pray that your transgressions may be pardoned. Do not, I beg of you, parade before the world the history of those who are not guilty of doing one hundredth part of the harm that you have done. If you ever truly feel this, you will have such a sense of your wicked course of action, that you will never, never seek to remove the mote from your brother’s or sister’s eye till the beam has been removed from your own eye.?{MR926 77.5}[280]
§563 你就我和我的著作所发表的言论是错误的,我必须说,你知道那是错误的。虽然如此,那些不熟悉你的人却把你的话当成是一个知情的人说的。因为你与我熟悉,并且与我有关系,你能说出你喜欢说的,而且你认为自己的足迹如此隐蔽以致绝不会被发现。但我的著作没有停止。我写出来他们就发表。我的抄写员们的话没有被放进去取代我自己的话。这是一个无法反驳的见证。我的文章为自己辩护。{MR926 77.6}[281]
§564 Your words regarding me and my writings are false, and I must say that you know them to be false. Nevertheless, those unacquainted with you take your words as being the words of one who knows. Because you have been acquainted with me, and connected with me, you can state what you please, and you think that your tracks are so covered that they will never be discovered. But my writings have not stopped. They go out as I have written them. No words of my copyists are put in the place of my own words. This is a testimony that cannot be controverted. My articles speak for themselves.?{MR926 77.6}[281]
§565 当我听到麦卡拉已背道时,我说:“我很高兴我与他的一切关系都具有最温柔的性质。”我认为他们没有什么反对我的话可以说。然而他和他妻子都作了同样的报告,与马尔科姆姐妹对我作的报告一样。麦卡拉向一大批会众说,一个认识我的人说我在所写的书中捡起一些内容,然后发出来,当作是主指示我看到的东西。在库兰邦的圣经学院,麦卡拉告诉我你对他和他妻子讲了与对马尔科姆姐妹讲的一样的言论。你撒的种子正在收获其结果。许多在墨尔本的人一直在重述同样的事,就是你告诉他们的事,他们以为那肯定是真的。{MR926 77.7}[282]
§566 When I heard that McCullagh had apostatized, I said, I am glad that all my connection with him has been of the tenderest character. I thought that there was nothing they could have to say against me. But both he and his wife bore the same report that Sister Malcolm bore to me. McCullagh stated in a large congregation that it was reported by one who knew that I picked up things written in books, and sent them out as something the Lord had shown me. At the Bible Institute in Cooranbong, McCullagh told me that you had made a?statement to him and his wife similar to the statement made to Sr. Malcolm. Your sowing is producing its harvest. Many in Melbourne have been repeating the same things, things which you have told them, and which they thought must be true.?{MR926 77.7}[282]
§567 我现在只愿进一步说我原谅你,且会继续祈祷像我已经做的那样,祈愿你能归正。在《评论与通讯》上的文章使我对你的情况比以往更灰心,因为我看到你披着自命不凡的光明外衣,而这是一种可怕的欺骗。愿主用眼药抹你的眼睛,使你能看清自己的真相,使你能有那种无需后悔的懊悔。{MR926 78.1}[283]
§568 I will now only say further that I forgive you, and will continue to pray as I have done that you may be converted. The articles in the Review give me more discouragement over your case than I have ever had; for I see you clothed in garments of pretentious light, and this is a terrible deception. May the Lord anoint your eyes with eye salve, that you may see yourself as you are, and that you may have that repentance that needs not to be repented of.?{MR926 78.1}[283]
§569 《信函》1897年114号,全信,(致坦尼弟兄和姐妹,1897年7月1日)—我一直在阅读你们的信。谢谢你们给我回信。我本来应该先给你们写信,但我想要是范妮愿意表现悔改,如有可能,我就会乐于让她的灵魂得救。我根本没有阅读她的文章,但一个十分了解《评论与通讯》上的文章的人叫我注意《青年导报》和《评论与通讯》上的文章。[见《评论与通讯》1897年4月13至5月11日。]{MR926 78.2}[284]
§570 Letter 114, 1897, entire letter. (To Bro. and Sr. Tenney, July 1, 1897)—I have been reading your letter. Thank-you for writing in response to my letter. I should have written to you at first, but I thought that if Fannie would show repentance, I would be pleased to have her soul saved if possible. I do not read her articles at all, but my attention was called to the articles in the Instructor and the Review by one who understood the articles in the Review perfectly. [See?The Review and Herald, April 13—May 11, 1897.]?{MR926 78.2}[284]
§571 她在这些文章中描绘了麦肯齐一家。那位温和的阿什伯里小姐就是范妮·博尔顿小姐。莫尔豪斯先生和夫人就是麦肯齐弟兄和他妻子,他们住在帕拉马塔。范妮对阿什伯里小姐的描绘,我想,正是她对自己的估计。她在这篇浪漫史中描绘自己有完美的品格,那种品格是她与那个家庭联络或她曾住在任何一个家庭时从未表现过的。{MR926 78.3}[285]
§572 In them she has represented the family of McKenzie. The mild Miss Ashbury is Miss Fannie Bolton. Mr. and Mrs. Morehouse are Bro. McKenzie and his wife, who live in Parramatta. The representation that Fannie gives of Miss Ashbury is, I suppose, exactly her estimate of herself. In this romance she has represented herself as having a perfection of character that she has never revealed in connection with that family or any family where she has been an inmate.?{MR926 78.3}[285]
§573 在这个故事中描绘了错误的想法。范妮确实在麦肯齐弟兄和姐妹租来的住宅里有一个房间,她的租金也确实在他们非常贫穷的一个时期帮助了他们,然而这个故事中的每一件事都被夸大了。她有一些线索用来写出这个故事,然而主要的故事发生在阿什菲尔德,在那里曾举行新南威尔士州第一次帐篷大会。在那次帐篷大会上,这些事中的一些事确实发生了,那些熟悉这些事实的人会认出这些事的意思。要是麦肯齐得到期刊,我毫不怀疑他会得到的,就会发生一次最大的动荡;因为麦肯齐弟兄和姐妹都是敏感又骄傲的人。{MR926 78.4}[286]
§574 False ideas are traced in this story. Fannie did have a room in the hired home of Bro. and Sr. McKenzie, and the rent from this helped them in a time of their great poverty; but everything in this story is exaggerated. She has had some threads to use in making out this story, but the main history was transacted at Ashfield, where the first camp-meeting was held in New South Wales. At that camp-meeting some of these things did take place, and those who are familiar with the facts will recognize the ones meant. Should McKenzie get hold of the paper, as I have no doubt he will, there would be one of the greatest commotions that could take place; for Bro. and Sister McKenzie are both sensitive and proud.?{MR926 78.4}[286]
§575 他确实受了试探。我们让贝尔登弟兄将他的家人和家具从帕拉马塔搬到了阿什菲尔德帐篷大会营地。我帮助了他们,给了他们、牛奶、水果和钱。麦肯齐弟兄变得对考德威尔弟兄很生气,因为考德威尔弟兄作了教会的长老,而麦肯齐弟兄却没有任职。{MR926 78.5}[287]
§576 He did become tempted. We had Bro. Belden move his family and furniture from Parramatta to the Ashfield camp-ground. I helped them by giving them clothing, milk, fruit, and money. Bro. McKenzie became displeased with Bro. Caldwell, because Bro. Caldwell was put in as Elder of the church, while Bro. McKenzie was not put into office.?{MR926 78.5}[287]
§577 W.C.怀特和艾米丽·坎贝尔发现麦肯齐弟兄有工作。他的女儿朱莉亚是一个很美好的姑娘,但朱莉亚却被描绘为已婚。她不是。艾米丽·坎贝尔和我付了往返城市的车费,她和艾米丽上了一所教速记的学校。当时考德威尔在为范妮做打字的工作,我觉得事情不对劲。我在一个异梦中蒙了警告,就与他们二人谈了话,告诉他们,他们在一起是不对的。{MR926 78.6}[288]
§578 W. C. White and Emily Campbell found Bro. McKenzie in work. His daughter, Julia, is a fine, nice girl, but Julia is represented as being married. She is not. Emily Campbell and I paid Julia’s carfare to and from the city, and she and Emily attended a school where shorthand was taught. At this time Caldwell was working the typewriter for Fannie, and I felt that matters were not going right. I was warned in a dream, and I talked with both of them, telling them that it was not right for them to be together.?{MR926 78.6}[288]
§579 我与麦肯齐谈了这件事,他说考德威尔在白天和晚上的任何时候来到他家都在引起丑闻。好了,我们遭到范妮和考德威尔的许多反对。他们说麦肯齐的恶意猜测是没有理智或理由的。然而负担却重重地加在我身上,我就告诉他们,不能再这样下去了。那里有我的客厅,威利的办公室;他们可以在那里写;因为威利出门在外,要么在墨尔本要么在新西兰。{MR926 78.7}[289]
§580 I talked with McKenzie about this matter, and he said that Caldwell’s coming to his home at all times of the day and in the evening was working up a scandal. Well, we met with much opposition from both Fannie and Caldwell. They said that McKenzie had no sense or reason for his evil?surmisings. But the burden was laid heavily upon me, and I told them it could not be thus any longer. There was my parlor, Willie’s office; they could write in that; for Willie was away, either in Melbourne or New Zealand.?{MR926 78.7}[289]
§581 好了,这种亲昵在继续。我告诉考德威尔,我不能让他参与我的工作了。他告诉我他和范妮之间没有什么,可是警告不断临到:“她是你的敌人。”我的负担很大;因为我在灵里没有安息。那个可怜的人麦肯齐开始喜欢油烟喝酒,我认为他们有了艰难时期。范妮那时远在库兰邦。{MR926 79.1}[290]
§582 Well, this familiarity continued. I told Caldwell that I could not have him connected with my work. He told me that there was nothing between him and Fannie, and yet the warning kept coming, “She is your adversary.” My burden was very great; for I had not rest in spirit. The poor man, McKenzie, took to smoking and drinking, and I think they had a hard time of it. Fannie was then away at Cooranbong.?{MR926 79.1}[290]
§583 范妮和考德威尔弟兄的合作始于墨尔本帐篷聚会期间。范妮在那时开始迷恋这个已经结婚并生有二子的男人。她完全否认自己和考德威尔弟兄之间有任何感情上的瓜葛。她在我的帐篷里站在我面前说,那些谣言都是无稽之谈。但从此之后一年的时间,范妮在工作上没有给我任何帮助,反倒成了一个死沉的重担。{MR926 79.2}[291]
§584 The work between Fannie and Bro. Caldwell was begun at the Melbourne camp-meeting. There she became enamored of a married man, with two children. She utterly denied that there was any affection between her and Bro. Caldwell. She stood before me in my tent, and declared that there was nothing to the reports. For one year after this, she was good for nothing to me, only a dead, heavy load.?{MR926 79.2}[291]
§585 来自上帝的警告不断临到,这些事终于在阿马代尔帐篷大会上达到紧急关头。范妮声称制作了我大部分书籍。在阿什菲尔德和阿马代尔帐篷大会上她都是由撒但授意的。还在布莱顿帐篷大会的时候,她的做法就一点不是基督徒应该有的样子。在那次的帐篷大会以之后,我摆脱了她。我解雇了她。我们有了一段非常严重的时期,但她那么谦卑地请求并写信给我,以致我饶恕了她,愚蠢地再试她一次。她被接回来,得了另一次试验。{MR926 79.3}[292]
§586 The warning from God kept coming, and finally at the Armadale camp meeting matters came to a head. Fannie claimed to make most of my books. Both at the Ashfield and Armadale camp meetings she was inspired by Satan. While at the Brighton camp meeting her course of action was anything that what a Christian’s should be. And after the camp meeting I cut loose from her. I discharged her. We had a very serious time, but she begged and wrote so humbly, that I forgave her, and foolishly tried her again. She was taken back, and given another trial.?{MR926 79.3}[292]
§587 我们住在普雷斯顿的时候,我告诉她,我决不能再让她在我家里和我同住了。在布莱顿帐篷大会上她告诉了初信的马尔科姆一家她不得不亲自制作我的书籍。她说怀姐妹不知道如何写作,或将两个句子放在一起,是个很无知的女人,而她,范妮·博尔顿的才华弥补了怀姐妹的缺乏。{MR926 79.4}[293]
§588 When living at Preston, I told her that I could never have her in my home to live with me again. At the Brighton camp-meeting she told the Malcolm family, who had recently come to the faith, that she had to make my books herself. She said that Sr. White did not know how to write, or put two sentences together, that she was a very ignorant woman, and that her, Fanny Bolton’s, talent supplied her lack.?{MR926 79.4}[293]
§589 范妮请求参加阿马代尔帐篷大会,说她会从事我的著作,不接管儿童聚会;但她没有遵守诺言。我想,她为我预备了一篇短文。当时在一份期刊上有关于我的一本书的广告。当范妮注意到这个广告说到普雷斯科特教授编辑了该书时,她就用野蛮的手势激烈地宣布那是一个谎言。她十分苦恼,向撒拉[麦克恩特弗]宣布工作是她做的,普雷斯科特教授却得到了荣耀。然而普雷斯科特姐妹曾在库兰邦蒙告知范妮的故事,她能看清事情的真正意义。范妮在与普雷斯科特姐妹交谈时,声称是他们认为非常美好的这本书中一些句子的作者。然而当她做出这种断言时,普雷斯科特姐妹告诉她,她知道得更清楚,因为她有一封来自怀姐妹的信,是她自己的笔迹,含有同样的句子。要是普雷斯科特姐妹在巴特尔克里克,你可以与她谈谈这事,她就会告诉你们是怎么回事。{MR926 79.5}[294]
§590 Fannie begged to go to the Armadale camp meeting, saying that she would do my writing, and not take up the children’s meetings; but she did not keep her word. One short article, I think, she prepared for me. There was at this time an advertisement in one of the papers regarding one of my books. When Fannie noticed this advertisement, which spoke of Prof. Prescott compiling the book, she vehemently declared with wild gesticulations, that it was a lie. She was all broken up, and declared to Sara [McEnterfer] that she had done the work herself, and now Prof. Prescott was taking the glory of it. But Sister Prescott had been told Fannie’s story at Cooranbong, and she could see things in their true bearing. In talking with Sister Prescott, Fannie claimed to be the author of some sentence in this book which they thought was very beautiful. But when she made this assertion, Sr. Prescott told her that she knew better, because she had a letter from Sister White, in her own handwriting, which contained the same sentence. If Sister Prescott is in Battle Creek you may talk with her in regard to this, and she will be able to tell you just how it was.?{MR926 79.5}[294]
§591 我有写给凯洛格医生的一封信,范妮进入我的房间时看到在我的桌子上。她在这封信中看到了自己的名字,便将撒拉叫到另一个房间,告诉她,她看见怀姐妹桌子上有一封写给凯洛格医生的信,在这封信中她看见了自己的名字。然后她叫撒拉得到这封信并交给她,以便她看到怀姐妹给凯洛格医生写了关于她的什么事。撒拉面对着她,问道:“你把我当什么?你以为我从美国一路来到这里为要从事那种工作吗?”范妮坚持说撒拉应该为她获取那封信,但撒拉宣布,她不会做这种事。范妮因此似乎不怎么信任撒拉。{MR926 79.6}[295]
§592 I had a letter written to Dr. Kellogg, which Fannie saw lying on my table as she came into my room. In this letter she saw her own name. She called Sara into another room, and told her that she had seen a letter addressed to Dr. Kellogg on Sr. White’s table, and that in this letter she saw her name. She then asked Sara to get this letter and give it to her, so that she might see what Sister White was writing about her to Dr. Kellogg. Sara faced her, and asked, “What do you take me for??Do you think I have come all the way from America to do that sort of work?” Fannie insisted that Sara should get the letter for her, but Sara declared that she would do no such thing. For this time Fannie seemed to have but little confidence in Sara.?{MR926 79.6}[295]
§593 我告诉你们这些事以便你们了解这个问题。我们在整个阿马代尔帐篷大会期间听说了许多关于范妮和考德威尔之间的风流韵事。我和他们都分别沟通过,并告诉他们主与他们二人有辩论。他们否认彼此之间有任何特别的依恋。我知道得更多;但主帮助我完成了帐篷大会的工作。帐篷聚会即将结束前,范妮来对我说,“怀姐妹啊,我来找你就像来找一位母亲一样。我确实全心爱考德威尔弟兄,我的心几乎都要碎了。这幸福之杯三次送到我的嘴边,但随后又被迅速拿走了。”这个女孩接着说道,“我向上帝祈求,如果我和考德威尔的结合是正确的,那就让他的妻子与他离婚。数周之前,她果然和他离婚了。现在你不认为主垂听了我的祷告吗?”当时我不敢和她谈论此事,因为那天我还要对着一大群会众讲道。如果普雷斯科特姐妹在巴特尔克里克,她会将详情告诉你们。{MR926 80.1}[296]
§594 I have told you these things that you may understand about the matter. We had the affair between Fannie and Caldwell all through the Armadale camp meeting. I talked with them both separately, and told them that the Lord had a controversy with them both. They denied that there was anything like particular attachment between them. I knew better; but the Lord helped me to work through the meeting. Just before the meeting closed, Fannie came to me, and said, “O Sr. White, I have come to you as to a mother. I do love Bro. Caldwell with all my heart, and my heart is just broken. Three times has this cup of bliss been presented to me, and then been snatched away.” Then the girl said, “I prayed that if it was right for us to get married, his wife might get a divorce from him, and it was not many weeks before she did get a divorce. Now don’t you think the Lord heard my prayer?” I dared not talk with her; for I had to speak that day before a large congregation. If Sr. Prescott is in Battle Creek, she will be able to tell you the particulars.?{MR926 80.1}[296]
§595 从那时起我便断绝了和范妮的联系,并考虑再不和她联络了。但此后不久,范妮从悉尼写信给我,再次承认了自己的罪。我以为我不能再让她回到我身边了,但主的灵临到我身上,说:“再给她一次试验。”于是我决定见见范妮,并告诉她我愿意接她回来。我这样做了,范妮回来或和我住了数周之久,但她什么工作都做不了;后来她决定想回家到她母亲那里去,我告诉她,她可以放心回去。而今在我因这两个人的行为和他们所讲彻头彻尾的谎言而经历了这一切的苦难和悲痛之后,竟然让范妮·博尔顿将这些文章发表在期刊上,高举她可怜、悲惨、瞎眼、贫困潦倒的灵魂,阿什伯里小姐实在让我难以下咽。这有太强的盘子味道了。如果我能找到,就会寄给你们写给范妮和考德威尔的信函的副本。{MR926 80.2}[297]
§596 Well, from that time I cut loose from Fannie, never, as I thought, to connect with her again. But a little while after this, Fannie was in Sydney, and wrote me another confession. I thought that I could not take her back, but the Spirit of the Lord rested upon me, and said, “Give her another trial.” So I decided that I would see Fannie, and tell her that I would take her back. This I did, and she remained with me several weeks, but was not able to do any work; and then she decided that she wanted to go home to her mother, and I told her that she might feel free to do so. And now after all the suffering and distress that I have passed through because of the actions of these two, and the downright lies they told, to have Fannie Bolton put these articles in the paper, exalting her poor, miserable, blind, poverty-stricken soul, Miss Ashbury is a little too large a mouthful for me to swallow. It tastes strong of the dish. If I can find them, I will send you copies of letters written to both Fannie and Caldwell.?{MR926 80.2}[297]
§597 《信函》1897年115号,全信,(致坦尼弟兄,1897年7月5日)—我收到了你的信。我在寄给你我已寄给范妮·博尔顿的一封信的副本。你从这封信可以看出,我看范妮·博尔顿是一个不能将痛悔的精神保持多久的人。她自我膨胀得厉害,以致她在表示因自己的行径而深感耻辱之后不久便不认识自己了。她迅速涌现生机,奇妙绽放,细述上帝对她的良善、慈爱、怜悯和饶恕,接受一切应许归她自己。{MR926 80.3}[298]
§598 Letter 115, 1897, entire letter. (To Bro. Tenney, July 5, 1897)—I received your letter. I am sending you a copy of a letter I have sent to Fannie Bolton. You can see from this letter that I regard Fannie as one who cannot retain a spirit of contrition for any length of time. She is so inflated with Fannie Bolton that she does not know herself a few moments after she has expressed deep humiliation because of her own course of action. She springs into life speedily, and blossoms out wonderfully, dwelling on the goodness, love, mercy, and forgiveness of God toward her, taking all the promises to herself.?{MR926 80.3}[298]
§599 过去她曾表示对自己的邪恶行径极其悲伤,但她并不坚持痛悔。她不继续心中痛悔。她突然闪现,以为自己受了上帝的默示。她在求问主的时候说,她嫁给考德威尔要是对的,他的妻子就可以与丈夫离婚,她告诉我,当她讲话和给人查经时,人们听她讲话脸色变得苍白,她以为自己是受了上帝默示。她的想象力很强,而她夸张的言论使她的话不可靠。{MR926 80.4}[299]
§600 In the past she has expressed wonderful sorrow for her wicked course of action, but she does not stay penitent. She does not continue to be contrite in heart. She flashes forth, thinking she is inspired by God. While she was praying the Lord that if it was right for her to marry Caldwell, his wife might get a divorce from her husband, she told me that as she talked and gave Bible readings, the people turned pale to hear her talk, and she thought she was inspired by God. Her imagination is very strong, and she makes such exaggerated statements that her words are not trustworthy.?{MR926 80.4}[299]
§601 我感到很遗憾,她的这些作品竟然发表在我们的期刊上。[见《评论与通讯》,1897年4月13日至5月11日]来自彭南特希尔的书伟弟兄长期担任一所公立学校的教师,最近访问了我。他在1894年接受了安息日。他似乎是一个有良好判断力和受过极好教育的人。他是我们几乎所有期刊的长期订户——《评论与通讯》、《青年导报》等等。他自己翻开这个题目,对我说:“怀姐妹呀,你注意到《评论与通讯》上那些奇怪的文章了吗?我觉着有点奇怪,竟然允许这种作品发表在期刊上。”他一点不知道范妮曾对我采取的做法。我告诉他,我没有阅读那些文章,直到别人叫我注意它们。然后我才读了一篇在《评论与通讯》上的文章和一篇在《青年导报》上的文章。书伟弟兄说:“博尔顿小姐必是心理失衡了。”{MR926 81.1}[300]
§602 I feel so sorry that these productions of hers ever entered our papers. [See?The Review and Herald, April 13—May 11, 1897.] Bro. Schowe from Pennant Hills, who has long been a government school teacher, recently made me a visit. He accepted the Sabbath in 1894. He seems to be a man of good sense and excellent education. He is a regular subscriber for nearly all our papers, the Review and Herald, and Youth’s Instructor, etc. He opened the subject himself, and said to me, “Sr. White, did you notice those strange articles in the Review and Herald? I thought it a little strange that such productions should be suffered to go through the papers.” He had no knowledge whatever of the course Fannie had pursued toward me. I told him that I did not read the articles till my attention was called to them by others. Then I read one in the Review, and one in the Instructor. Bro. Schowe said, “Miss Bolton must have lost her balance of mind.”?{MR926 81.1}[300]
§603 我很遗憾而且感到羞耻,竟让载有这种文章的期刊传给他人。范妮·博尔顿笔下的一篇又一篇文章出现在期刊上。这是什么意思呢?当我能找到它们的时候,就会以寄给你我写给她的一些信和她的回信的副本。她在我家里的时候,似乎撒但利用她为代表,制造了一些事端使全家人都痛苦。她会花时间认罪,然后会说一个人会请另一个人说的一切话。但她会再三重蹈覆辙,每一次都比之前更糟糕,直到我确定撒但的试探强烈影响着她想要受重视的欲望,以致她没有力量逃脱网罗。她是一个与仇敌在一起的人,在侍奉他。{MR926 81.2}[301]
§604 O, I am so sorry and ashamed to have the paper go to others with such articles as this in it. Piece after piece from Fannie’s pen appears in the papers. What does it mean? When I can find them, I will send you copies of some letters written by me to her, and her answers. When she was in my family, it seemed that Satan used her as his agent to invent those things that would make the whole household miserable. She would have her times of confession, and would then say all that one could ask another to say. But she would go over the same ground again and again, each time worse than before, until I decided that Satan’s temptations, working upon her desire for recognition, were so strong that she had no power to escape from the snare. She was one with the enemy, working in his service.?{MR926 81.2}[301]
§605 现在,我的弟兄,要不是因为发表在《评论与通讯》上的这些文章,我本来会保持沉默。我想只要范妮离我远远的,不再麻烦我,我就不愿揭穿她,而会任凭这个可怜的、受迷惑的、品格扭曲的人。然而当她在我们的期刊上大放厥词时,我就必须发言。我不敢保持沉默。这种作品不会对人有任何益处,主的福气也不会伴随着它们。{MR926 81.3}[302]
§606 Now, my brother, if it had not been for these articles in the Review, I would have held my peace. I thought that if Fannie would only keep away from me, and trouble me no more, I would not expose her, but would let the poor, deluded, misshapen character alone. But when she figures so largely in our papers, I must speak. I dare not keep silent. Such productions do no one any good, and the blessing of the Lord cannot attend them.?{MR926 81.3}[302]
§607 《信函》1898年6号第2页,(致艾米丽·坎贝尔,1898年1月12日)—我不得不写作的量比我一生从前的任何时期都大。玛吉·黑尔和明妮·霍金斯在做善工。我很欣慰范妮没有和我在一起。她不知道自己具有怎样的精神,我也不认为她曾愿意知道,因为她在自己的才干方面被仇敌迷惑了。她若是愿意归正,保持在品格上的改变,就没有人会比我更快乐了。然而即使在那时我也会对她说:要留在美国;绝不要再跨洋过来。{MR926 88.1}[303]
§608 Letter 6, 1898, p. 2. (To Emily Campbell, January 12, 1898)—The amount of writing that I have been compelled to do has been greater than at any former period of my life. Maggie Hare and Minnie Hawkins are doing good work. I feel so thankful that Fannie is not with me. She does not know what manner of spirit she is of, and I do not think she ever will; for she is deluded by the enemy in regard to her own talents. If she would be converted and remain transformed in character, no one would be more happy than I. But even then I would say to her, Remain in America. Never come across the waters again.?{MR926 88.1}[303]
§609 《信函》1900年61a号,全文,(致G.A.欧文,1900年4月23日,没有寄出——见修改后的副本,《信函》1900年61号)—我十二点半以后就睡不着了。我读了你论到范妮的话。我就她与考德威尔约会的事写了许多,但我不想使她的情况成为公开的事。因此我不会寄给你那些论到她在这个国家品行不端的信,她的不良品德根除了那些认识她之人对她的信任。如有必要,我可以寄出这些信,但我现在不想这么做。{MR926 92.1}[304]
§610 Letter 61a, 1900, entire letter. (To G. A. Irwin, April 23, 1900, not sent—see revised copy,?Letter 61, 1900)—I cannot sleep after half past twelve. I have read what you say in regard to Fannie. I have many things written in reference to her engagement with Caldwell, but I do not wish to make her case a public matter. Therefore I shall not send the letters written in reference to her misbehavior in this country, which has uprooted the confidence of those who know her. I can send these letters if it is essential, but I do not want to do so.?{MR926 92.1}[304]
§611 关于我告诉范妮要写信给A.R.亨利的说法乃是捏造的,根本没有这种事。她为什么发表这种纯属谎言的言论对我来说是一个谜。我有我已写给A.R.亨利的全部信函的副本。据我所知,我从未告诉范妮要为我写一封信给任何一个人。{MR926 92.2}[305]
§612 The statement in regard to my telling Fannie to write to A. R. Henry is a fabrication which has not in it one thread of truth. Why she makes statements which are sheer falsehoods is a mystery to me. I have copies of all the letters I have written to A. R Henry. I never to my knowledge told Fannie to write a letter for me to any person whatever.?{MR926 92.2}[305]
§613 一天夜里,在我与范妮·博尔顿断开之后,我有了一次奇异的经历。耶和华的使者站在我身边,指示我给范妮一个机会再次与我联络并开始从事工作。我要再给她一次试验。我这么做了,令所有人的都震惊。当时,范妮生着病,住在麦卡拉弟兄家。我把她接到我家,为她装备了一个房间,离开其他工人;因为她受不了一点噪音。{MR926 92.3}[306]
§614 One night, after I had disconnected from Fannie Bolton, I had a singular experience. The angel of the Lord stood by my side, instructing me to give Fannie a chance to connect with me again and take up the work again. I was to give her another trial. To the astonishment of all, I did this. At the time, Fannie was sick, and was staying at Brother McCullagh’s. I brought her to my home, and fitted up a room for her away from the other workers; for she could not endure the least noise.?{MR926 92.3}[306]
§615 我像对我的亲姐妹一样关心她。过了一段时间之后,我将副本交在她手里,好向她证明我愿意做那位使者指示我去做的事。她接过副本,她所要做的一切就是将它宣读给我的一个抄写员。然而尽管有她想要的一切时间,她却不能读完那篇文章。她告诉我,她不可能做这工作,她也决不会再有将宝贵的材料交在她手中的特权了。{MR926 92.4}[307]
§616 I cared for her as I would for my own sister. Then after a time, I put copy in her hands, to evidence to her that I would do the work pointed out by the angel for me to do. She took the copy, and all she had to do was to read it to one of my copyists. But though she had all the time she wanted, she could not complete the article. She told me that she could not possibly do the work, and that she would never again have the privilege of having the precious matter in her hands.?{MR926 92.4}[307]
§617 她说:“我担心我完全不适合这工作。我甚至不能处理这篇文章。我采取了这样一种做法(说到考德威尔)以致我降卑受辱到尘埃了。我不能留在这个地方,在我的做法这么为人所知的地方。我必须回美国去。”{MR926 92.5}[308]
§618 “I fear,” she said, “that I am wholly unfitted for the work. I cannot even do this article. I have pursued such a course (speaking in reference to Caldwell) that I am humiliated in the dust. I cannot remain in this place, where my course is so well known. I must go to America.”?{MR926 92.5}[308]
§619 然后她就请求我让她带一些文章去为我预备。她在安阿伯的时候我曾这么做过。我说:“不行,范妮;我的著作不会放在你手里。我在这一点上是坚决的。”好了,她说:“你若还需要我为你预备副本,我会在我的健康状况改善以后很高兴去做的。”她设法让我说要是她愿意,就可以回到我身边。我说:“不;你离开我既是出于你自己的意志,我就决不会再让你参与我的工作了。”她说要是我愿意接她回来,她就愿意自己支付到澳大利亚的路费。但我告诉她,我不能做出任何承诺。我说:“主指示我要饶恕你并接你回来受另一次试验。我已这么做了;然而即使在你承认你对待我的错误做法的时候,你还说你担心要是你尝试再次开始从事这工作,你就会重蹈覆辙。你已告诉我你不敢再次开始从事这工作,你认为你最好回美国去。当你这么说的时候,我就自由了。”{MR926 92.6}[309]
§620 She then begged me to let her take some articles with her to prepare for me. I did this once when she was at Ann Arbor. I said, “No, Fannie; none of my writings shall be placed in your hands. I am decided on this point.” Well, she said, “if you ever need me to prepare copy for you, I would be glad to do it after my health improves.” She tried to get me to say that she could return to me if she desired to. I said, “No; when you leave me of your own will, I shall never re-unite you with my work.” She said that if I would take her back, she would pay her own passage to Australia. But I told her that I could make no promise whatever. I said, “The Lord instructed me to forgive you and take you back for another trial. I have done this; but even while you are confessing your wrong course to me, you say that you are?afraid, should you attempt to take up the work again, you would go over the same ground you have gone over in the past. You have already told me that you dare not take up the work again, that you think you had better go to America. When you said this, I was free.”?{MR926 92.6}[309]
§621 现在我看出为什么我蒙指示要给范妮另一次试验了。有些人因范妮的失实陈述而误解了我。这些人正注意看我会对她采取怎样的做法。他们会说我虐待了可怜的范妮·博尔顿。我听从接她回来的指示,就除掉了那些准备要谴责我的人所有批评我的机会。{MR926 93.1}[310]
§622 I see now why it was that I was directed to give Fannie another trial. There are those who misunderstand me because of Fannie’s misrepresentations. These were watching to see what course I would take in regard to her. If I had disconnected from her, they would have made the most they possibly could of the way in which I had abused poor Fannie Bolton. The course I pursued in following the directions given me took away any occasion of criticism from those who wanted to condemn me.?{MR926 93.1}[310]
§623 我决不希望范妮再与我联络了。我写给爱德森无论如何也不要雇用她;因为她的想象力如此处在仇敌的控制之下,以致他会诱导她夸张到任何程度。{MR926 93.2}[311]
§624 I have never wanted Fannie to connect with me again. I wrote to Edson not to employ her on any account; for her imagination was so under the control of the enemy that he could lead her to exaggerate to any extent.?{MR926 93.2}[311]
§625 我没有提到已使我非常忧伤的不愉快的经历,就是她与考德威尔的关系中她那苦恋之情、她可怕的欺骗与谎言所造成的,他们二人都承认了这些。当范妮因充满了撒但的精神而将他的试探付诸行动的时候,她就声称她的查经是上帝所感动的。她说当她说讲道时,她的听众就会在她话语的影响之下变得苍白。我们许多弟兄和姐妹都声称她是上帝默示的,然而我既了解她正在采取的卑劣做法和她正在讲的绝对的谎言,就告诉他们不要贪求这种灵感;因为它与撒但的存货是一个等次的。{MR926 93.3}[312]
§626 I have not mentioned the disagreeable experience which has cost me so much sorrow, which was caused by her lovesick sentimentalism in her connection with Caldwell, her terrible deception and falsehoods, which both she and he confessed. While Fannie was acting out the temptations of Satan, because imbued with his spirit, she claimed that the Bible-readings she gave were inspired by God. She said that when she talked, her hearers would grow pale under the effect of her words. Many of our brethren and sisters claimed that she was inspired, but understanding the underhanded course she was taking and the positive falsehoods she was telling, I told them that they need not covet any such inspiration; for it was of the same order that Satan keeps in his stock in trade.?{MR926 93.3}[312]
§627 你可以这种思路规劝别人:我现在发表在期刊上的文章与范妮与我在一起时发表的那些文章哪里有不同呢?现在是谁放进词语弥补我语言文字的缺乏、我可悲的无知呢?在范妮·博尔顿与我的著作有任何关系之前这是怎么做成的呢?{MR926 93.4}[313]
§628 You may reason with others on this line: Wherein do my articles in the papers now differ from what they were when Fannie was with me? Who is it that now puts in words to supply the deficiencies of my language, my deplorable ignorance? How was this done before Fannie Bolton had anything to do with my writings??{MR926 93.4}[313]
§629 有理智的人难道看不出这一点吗?要是范妮补足了我的大缺陷,我现在还怎么能向期刊投稿呢?{MR926 93.5}[314]
§630 Cannot people who have reason see this? If Fannie supplied my great deficiency, how is it that I can now send articles to the papers??{MR926 93.5}[314]
§631 范妮就此所说的都是骗人的。是她不知道呢?还是撒但如此影响了她的想象以致她认为自己说的是真的呢?{MR926 93.6}[315]
§632 What Fannie says in regard to this is all a sham. Does she not know it? Or does Satan work on her imagination in such a way that she thinks what she says is true??{MR926 93.6}[315]
§633 我告诉你她的话一点也不诚实。我的抄写员你都见过了。他们没有改变我的语言。我的文字保持了原貌。玛丽安的工作就完全不同了,她是我的编辑者;范妮从来不是我的编辑者。我的书是怎样完成的呢?玛丽安从不提出自己的主张要求认可。她是这样工作的:她把我发表在报刊上的文章搜集起来,贴在空白本子上。她还保存着一本我所写的全部书信。在为一本书准备一章时,玛丽安就想起了我在那一方面所写的某些材料,可能把观点表达得更加有力,于是她就去找这份材料。找到后,当她看到这材料会使这一章意义更加清楚,她就添了进去。{MR926 93.7}[316]
§634 I tell you that there is not a semblance of truth in her statements. My copyists you have seen. They do not change my language. It stands as I write it. Marian’s work is of a different order altogether. She is my book-maker. Fannie never was my book-maker. How are my books made? Marian does not put in her claim for recognition. She does her work in this way. She takes my articles which are published in the papers, and pastes them in blank books. She also has a copy of all the letters I write. In preparing a chapter for a book, Marian remembers that I have written something on that special point, which may make the matter more forcible. She begins to search for this, and if when she finds it, she sees that it will make the chapter more clear, she adds it.?{MR926 93.7}[316]
§635 这些书不是玛丽安的作品,而是我自己的,是从我所有的作品中搜集出来的。玛丽安收集材料的范围很大,她善于安排材料的才能对我是很可贵的。这使我省得考虑许多我没有工夫去考虑的事情。{MR926 93.8}[317]
§636 The books are not Marian’s productions, but my own, gathered from all my writings. Marian has a large field from which to draw, and her ability to arrange this matter is of great value to me. It saves my poring over a mass of matter, which I have no time to do.?{MR926 93.8}[317]
§637 所以你就明白玛丽安在出版我的书籍上是我最宝贵的助手。范妮一点不做这样的工作。玛丽安读了几章给她,而范妮有时就内容的安排提一些建议。{MR926 93.9}[318]
§638 So you understand that Marian is a most valuable help to me in bringing out my books. Fannie had?none of this work to do. Marian has read chapters to her, and Fannie has sometimes made suggestions as to the arrangement of the matter.?{MR926 93.9}[318]
§639 这就是工人们之间的不同。正如我已经说过的,范妮受到严格的禁止,不可把我的话改成她的话。天使说话时,言语非常纯朴;我设法把那些思想用简洁的语言表达出来,使小孩子也能听懂所说的每一句话。别人的话不会正确地代表我。{MR926 94.1}[319]
§640 This is the difference between the workers. As I have stated, Fannie has been strictly forbidden to change my words for her words. As spoken by the heavenly agencies, the words are severe in their simplicity; and I try to put the thoughts into such simple language that a child can understand every word uttered. The words of someone else would not rightly represent me.?{MR926 94.1}[319]
§641 我写得这么充分是为了让你明白这事。范妮可能声称她制作了我的书,但她没有这样做。这一直是玛丽安的领域,而她的工作远远超过范妮为我做的任何工作。{MR926 94.2}[320]
§642 I have written thus fully in order that you may understand the matter. Fannie Bolton may claim that she has made my books, but she has not done so. This has been Marian’s field, and her work is far in advance of any work Fannie has done for me.?{MR926 94.2}[320]
§643 我在凌晨十二点半到四点写了这封信。我现在必须离开它去写别的信了。但我想要问,如果范妮归正了并且为主所用,为什么她对自己以往为我所做之工的表现没有清晰的眼光呢?我想圣灵首先要为她做的工作就是使她承认她已用虚假言论向别人误表了我。主就会清除她心中的迷雾,引导她看见她因说她制作了我的全部著作而对我造成的大损害。{MR926 94.3}[321]
§644 I have written this letter between half past twelve and four o’clock a.m. I must now leave it to write other letters. But I wish to ask, If Fannie is converted and is used by the Lord, why is not her vision clear in reference to her past representation of the work she has done for me? I think the first work the Holy Spirit would do for her would be to lead her to confess that by false statements she has misrepresented me to others. The Lord would clear away the mist and fog from her mind, leading her to see the great injury she has done me by saying that she made over all my writings.?{MR926 94.3}[321]
§645 当主教导她并向她显明她已动摇和破坏了许多人对上帝之灵的证言的信心,就如她通过声称她已接到指示要给A.R.亨利写一篇证言,动摇和破坏了巴特霍夫弟兄对主赐给我去做的工作的信心时,她才会看到自己正站在哪里。关于给A.R.亨利写证言的言论绝对是一个谎言。{MR926 94.4}[322]
§646 When the Lord teaches her and reveals to her how she has unsettled and undermined the faith of many in the testimonies of the Spirit of God, as she has unsettled and undermined the faith of Brother Bartholf in the work the Lord has given me to do, by making the statement that she was directed to write a testimony to A. R. Henry, she will see where she is standing. The statement in regard to the testimony for A. R. Henry is an absolute falsehood.?{MR926 94.4}[322]
§647 那些接受这种言论的人是没有理由的。“凭着他们的果子,就可以认出他们来”(太7:20)。我自从1845年就在园地中工作了。从那时到现在我一直用笔和声音工作。更强的亮光临到了我,因为我分授了所赐给我的亮光。我有了更多关于新旧约圣经的亮光,要将之呈现在我们的人面前,只要我的道路不被范妮·博尔顿发挥的这种影响所阻隔。她做的这种事要求我用笔墨和声音反驳她的言论,以便解救可怜的人不至被她的断言完全淹没,她竟声称自己领受了圣灵。这是她欲望的另一个方面,想要高抬自己为主所任命要传信息给祂百姓的人。主并没有差派她,她却奔跑。她不会尊荣上帝的圣工,反而会误导他人。{MR926 94.5}[323]
§648 Those who receive such statements are without excuse. “By their fruits ye shall know them.” My work has been in the field since 1845. Ever since then I have labored with pen and voice. Increased light has come to me as I have imparted the light given me. I have very much more light on the Old and New Testament Scriptures, which I shall present to our people if my way is not blocked by such influences as the influence exerted by Fannie Bolton. Such a work as hers calls for my pen and voice to contradict her statements, in order to save poor souls from being entirely swamped by her assertion that she has received the Holy Ghost. This is another phase of her desire to exalt herself as ordained by the Lord to bear a message to His people. The Lord did not send her, yet she ran. She will not honor the cause of God, but will mislead others.?{MR926 94.5}[323]
§649 尽管上帝的证言已在园地中这么多年,有些人却一直不愿领受这些真证言,他们不认识主的声音,会听从陌生人的声音,从一个可怜的、受骗的、不平衡的人领受自以为是真理的东西。糠秕怎能与麦子比较呢?要知道你们的属灵生命在受试验,不要接受虚妄的观点。愿上帝拯救祂的子民脱离撒但的网罗。{MR926 94.6}[324]
§650 Those who have been unwilling to receive the true testimonies of God, notwithstanding that these testimonies have been in the field for so many years, who know not the voice of the Lord, may listen to the voice of a stranger, and receive from a poor, deceived, unbalanced human agent what is supposed to be truth. What is the chaff to the wheat? Know that you are on trial for spiritual life, and accept no delusive sentiments. God save His people from Satan’s snare.?{MR926 94.6}[324]
§651 《信函》1900年61号,全文,(致G.A.欧文,1900年4月23日,《信函》1900年61a号修改后的副本)—我读了你就范妮·博尔顿所说的话。这种言论——说我告诉范妮要给A.R.亨利写一封信或证言——不是真实的。我给各教会和个人的证言从来不是以那种方式写的。{MR926 94.7}[325]
§652 Letter 61, 1900, entire letter. (To G. A. Irwin, April 23, 1900, revised copy of?Letter 61a, 1900)—I have read what you say in regard to Fannie Bolton. There is no truth in the statement that I told Fannie to write a letter or testimony to A. R. Henry. My testimonies to the churches, and to?individuals have never been written that way.?{MR926 94.7}[325]
§653 范妮不是第一次声称自己是上帝默示的了。她在阿马代尔帐篷大会之后不久便声称她的查经是上帝默示的。她说当她讲话时,她的听众会在她话语的影响之下变得苍白。我们的一些人相信了她的断言,以为她是上帝默示的。但我知道她的做法和她的精神是令上帝不悦的。她那不明智、不一致的做法表明她是在魔鬼的欺骗之下。{MR926 95.1}[326]
§654 The claim that she is inspired is not a new one with Fannie. Shortly after the Armadale campmeeting, she claimed that the Bible-readings that she gave were inspired of God. She said that when she talked, her hearers would grow pale under the effects of her words. Some of our people believed the assertion that she was inspired. But I knew that her course and her spirit were not pleasing to God. Her unwise, inconsistent course, showed that she was under a deception of the devil.?{MR926 95.1}[326]
§655 在范妮全部的经验中,她的亮光一直太像流星的光。闪现一下,就消失在黑暗中了。她的情绪被认为是她的宗教。多么遗憾呀,她对自己光辉的闪现太自信了。她的头脑充满了一种情绪化的宗教,她不知道什么是真材实料。{MR926 95.2}[327]
§656 All through her experience, Fannie’s light has been too much like that of a meteor. It flashes up, and then goes out in darkness. Her feelings are counted by her to be religion. What a pity that she has so much confidence in her brilliant flashes. Her mind is so full of an emotional religion, that she knows not what the genuine article is.?{MR926 95.2}[327]
§657 她如果归正了,并为上帝所用,就会对她以往虚假地陈述她为我所做之工产生的影响有清晰的理解,且会承认她就此所作的一些虚假陈述,这些东西已被仇敌用来动摇和破坏许多人对上帝之灵证言的信心。{MR926 95.3}[328]
§658 If she were converted, and used by the Lord, she would have a clear understanding of the influence of her past misrepresentations of the work she has done for me, and would confess some of her misstatements regarding it, which have been used by the enemy to unsettle and undermine the faith of many, in the testimonies of the Spirit of God.?{MR926 95.3}[328]
§659 我们听到的她现在正提出的这种断言必须予以反驳,好叫可怜的人们不被欺骗。她声称自己现在已领受了圣灵,这是她想要高抬自我为主所命定要传信息给祂子民之人的另一个表现。主并没有差遣她,可是她却妄自奔跑。{MR926 95.4}[329]
§660 Such claims as we hear that she is now putting forth, must be contradicted, that poor souls may be saved from deception. This claim that she has now received the Holy Spirit, is another manifestation of the desire to exalt herself as ordained by the Lord to bear a message to His people. The Lord did not send her, yet she ran.?{MR926 95.4}[329]
§661 那些不认识上帝的声音,一直不愿领受来自主的这些真证言的人,会听从陌生人的声音,从人那里领受自以为是真理的东西。但“糠秕怎能与麦子比较呢”(耶23:28)?上帝的子民要知道自己正在为永生而接受考验,不可领受虚妄的观点。愿上帝拯救他们脱离撒但的网罗。{MR926 95.5}[330]
§662 Those who know not the voice of God, those who have been unwilling to receive the true testimonies from the Lord, may listen to the voice of a stranger, and receive from a human agent what is supposed to be truth. But, “What is the chaff to the wheat?” The people of God should know that they are on trial for eternal life, and that they must accept no delusive sentiments. May God save them from Satan’s snares.?{MR926 95.5}[330]
§663 一些人会问,如果表现出了这种想要称赞、这种高抬自我的倾向,为什么博尔顿姐妹蒙允许参与这工作这么久呢?我曾在不同的时间忠心地为她操劳,指出她的危险,尽力帮助她明白工作的性质,以及人与这工作的关系。她多次承认了她受到的赞许曾导致她犯的错误,也承认了她的软弱和贪爱人的称赞。她会宣称自己现在已经彻底学到教训,以后会提防自高。她总是渴望留下来参与工作,有时流着泪恳求不要让她与这工作断开。{MR926 95.6}[331]
§664 Some may ask, why was Sr. Bolton allowed to be so long connected with the work, if this desire for praise, this tendency to self-exaltation was manifested? At different times I labored with her faithfully, pointing out her danger, and endeavoring to help her to understand the character of the work, and the relations of the human agent to it. Many times she acknowledged the mistakes that her approbativeness had led her to make, and confessed her weakness, and love of praise. She would declare that the lesson had now been thoroughly learned, and that thereafter she would guard against self-exaltation. And she was always anxious to retain her connection with the work, sometimes begging with tears not to be disconnected from it.?{MR926 95.6}[331]
§665 我有好几次蒙主警告她在采取一种要破坏人们对证言的信心的做法,在阿马代尔帐篷大会之后,她与我的工作断开了。这是一次重大的解脱,因为她不明智的做法已成了我的一个大重担。然而此后的一天晚上,耶和华的使者站在我身边,指示我要给范妮另一次机会与我联络,再次开始工作。我清楚地蒙指示要再给她一个试验。我这么做了,令那些知道她那不稳定不明智的做法使工作所遭受的损失和使我所遭受的苦难的人感到震惊。她在麦卡拉弟兄家生了病。我将她接到我家里,为她装备了一个房间,远离其他工人,因为她受不了任何噪音。我关怀她就像对我的亲姐妹。一段时间以后,我将副本放在她手中,尽力遵循那位使者向我指出的做法。她接过那篇文章,开始工作,却发现她不能继续。她告诉我,她不可能做这工作了,她担心她决不会再有将宝贵的材料交在她手中的特权了。{MR926 95.7}[332]
§666 Several times I was warned of the Lord that she was taking a course to undermine the confidence of the people in the testimonies, and after the Armadale campmeeting she was disconnected from my work. This was a great relief, for her injudicious course had become a great burden to me. But one night, after this, the angel of the Lord stood by my side, instructing me to give Fannie another chance to connect with me, and again take up the work. I was plainly instructed to give her another trial. To the astonishment of those who knew what the work had suffered, and what I had suffered, from her erratic and injudicious course, I did this. She was sick at the home of Brother McCullagh. I brought her to my home, and fitted up a room for her away from the other workers, for?she could not endure any noise. I cared for her as I would for my own sister. And after a time I put copy in her hands, endeavoring to follow the course pointed out to me by the angel. She took the article, and began the work, but found that she was not able to proceed with it. She told me she could not possibly do the work, and she feared that she would never again have the privilege of having the precious matter in her hands.?{MR926 95.7}[332]
§667 她就请求我让她带走一些文章,好在她能做的时候去为我预备,但我不能同意这样做。她还说到当她恢复健康时,要回到澳大利亚来,再次开始工作。但我告诉她,我不能就此提供鼓励。我说:“主指示我要饶恕你,并接你回来受另一次试验。我已这么做了。然而即使在你承认你对待我和这工作的错误做法的时候,你也承认你担心要是你尝试再次开始从事这工作,你就会重蹈覆辙。你已告诉我你不敢在这里再次开始从事这工作,你认为你最好回美国去。当你这么说的时候,我就自由了。”{MR926 96.1}[333]
§668 She asked that she might take some articles with her to prepare for me when she was able, but to this I could not consent. She also spoke of returning to Australia when her health was restored, to again take up the work. But I told her that I could hold out no encouragement regarding this. I said, “The Lord instructed me to forgive you, and take you back for another trial. This I have done. But even while you are confessing your wrong course to me and the work, you admit that you are afraid, should you take up the work again, that you would go over the same ground that you have gone over in the past. You have said that you dare not take up the work again here, and that you think you would better go to America. When you say this, I am free.”?{MR926 96.1}[333]
§669 现在我看出为什么我蒙指示要给范妮另一次试验了。有些人因范妮的失实陈述而误解了我。这些人正注意看我会对她采取怎样的做法。他们会说我虐待了可怜的范妮·博尔顿。我听从接她回来的指示,就除掉了那些准备要谴责我的人所有批评我的机会。{MR926 96.2}[334]
§670 I now see why I was directed to give Fannie another trial. There are those who misunderstood me because of Fannie’s misrepresentations. These were watching to see what course I would take in regard to her. They would have represented that I had abused poor Fannie Bolton. In following the directions to take her back, I took away all occasion for criticism from those who were ready to condemn me.?{MR926 96.2}[334]
§671 《信函》1900年166号1,2页,(致赫斯格弟兄夫妇和G.A.欧文弟兄,1900年4月25日)—在寄给你们一些关于范妮·博尔顿的材料。你们需要对我们的所有的人说她不是主的信使,她也决不应该受到鼓励。她会将戏剧性的东西混进她的属灵活动中,以致不会提升而会降低上帝的圣工。她是一场闹剧。我有好几封她的亲笔信的副本,她的忏悔是我还没有时间抄写的。它们在得到抄写之前不可出我的手。考德威尔从她手中夺过一份与他们俩有关的证言,把它烧了,然后告诉她,她不用再担心了;她或怀姐妹不会再看见它了。然后我便催他要那份证言。考德威尔说他会给我带来的,然后又说找不到了;当我告诉他我知道他对那份证言做了什么的时候,他说他必须把它和他不想保留的一些信一起烧了;后来他承认了自己的谎言,并说他是故意烧的。好了,我有很大量的信函与范妮和我之间的这事有关。如果需要全部暴露于人前使他们不至受欺骗,我就会在将这些信函备份后寄出。然而要告诉我们的人,我不想揭露范妮,除非我不得不这么做,以免上帝的圣工被败坏。{MR926 96.3}[335]
§672 Letter 166, 1900, pp. 1, 2. (To Bro. and Sr. Haskell, and Bro. G. A. Irwin, April 25, 1900)—Something is being sent to you in regard to Fannie Bolton. You need to say to all our people that she is not the Lord’s messenger, and she should in no way be encouraged. She would mingle the theatrical with her spiritual actions, that would not elevate, but degrade the cause of God. She is a farce. I have several copies of letters in her own handwriting, confessions, which I cannot possibly get copied. They must not go out of my hands until they are copied. Caldwell took a testimony from her hands that related to them both, and burned it up, and then told her she need not worry any more about [it]; she nor Sister White would ever see it again. Then he was pressed by me for the Testimony. Caldwell said he would bring it to me, and then said he could not find it; and then when I told him I knew what he had done with it, he said he must have burned it with some of his letters he did not care to keep; and then afterward he confessed his falsehoods, and said he burnt it designedly. Well, I have quite a large amount of letters concerning this matter between Fannie and me. If it needs to be all exposed before the people will be undeceived, I will send these letters after they are copied. But tell our people I do not want to expose Fannie, unless I am obliged to do this to save the cause of God from being corrupted.?{MR926 96.3}[335]
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