第654号 与不信配偶的婚姻生活
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第654号 与不信配偶的婚姻生活
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MR No. 654 - Marriage with an Unbelieving Spouse
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夜间我在梦中看到保健院中的情形。我看到你不快乐，很沮丧，就感到忧伤。……。但当我因这启示而哀伤时，某医生啊，有一位在和你说话。祂的话虽是责备之言，却搀合着温柔的怜悯。我无法将祂说的话一字不差地写下来，只能尽力将其中的含义转达给你。祂说：“你在使自己失去勇气，但你这样做是不明智的；你会变得软弱无能。这会使仇敌占你的便宜。上帝希望你与祂更亲近，在形像和品格上象基督。你的心中盘踞着许多混乱的情绪，是你没有积极努力去克服的。你没有全心全意地投入洁净心灵之殿的工作。你用心不智，竟然想与你的妻子离婚。这决非出于上帝的带领。你没有把这事藏在自己心里，却在把自己的想法和计划告诉别人，从而为撒但预备了道路，让他能用你的意见影响别人。{8MR431.1}[1]
§4
I was in the night season in my dreams brought in connection with the Health Retreat. I felt grieved to see you unhappy and much discouraged. . . . But while I was distressed over this revelation to me, there was one speaking with you, Dr. _____. His words reproved you, but were mingled with tender compassion. I cannot write the exact words as he spoke them. I will try my best to give you the import of them. He said: You are nourishing despondency, but in this you are not wise; you will become weak and inefficient. This will give the enemy advantage over you. God would have you grow nearer and closer to Himself, to resemble the image and character of Christ. Your heart is the seat of many tumultuous feelings, which you do not strive vigorously to overcome. You do not put your full heart and will into the work of cleansing the soul-temple. Your mind is unwisely exercised on the subject of divorce from your wife. God is not leading you in this. You are not keeping this matter bound within your own mind. You are telling your ideas and plans to others, and in thus doing you are preparing the way for Satan to affect the minds of others by your suggestions. {8MR 431.1}[1]
§5
“婚约问题在你心中并未居于其应有的神圣崇高的地位，你必有危险偏行错误的道路，因你的意见危及他人。你的心既因这事焦躁不安，就无法预备作最好的工作，你也无法恳切寻求主的祝福，除非你上到更高的地步。你已确实伤害了别人的心思意念。你要赶快关闭已向仇敌敞开的心门！敞开自己的心扉，邀请耶稣进来。惟有这样你那漂泊无定的性情才可得到安稳平衡，你才能将整个身心投入到工作中去，认识到这工作的重要性。你要利用一切能使你上行的机会，发挥一种坚定健康的影响。要赶快做这事。你若想作一个自由快乐的人，就必须抵抗仇敌。”……{8MR431.2}[2]
§6
The matter of the marriage covenant does not stand sacred and elevated in your mind as it should, and you will be certainly in danger of pursuing a wrong course yourself, and endangering other souls by your suggestions. Your mind while stirred up on this subject cannot be prepared to do the best work, and you cannot be an earnest seeker for the blessing of the Lord, unless you shall come up on higher ground. You have done positive injury to the hearts and minds of others. Close quickly the door of your heart that has been open to the enemy. Open wide the door of your heart and invite Jesus to come in. You will then have a balance-wheel to your somewhat erratic nature, that you can put your whole being into your work, realizing its importance. Improve every opportunity to work your way upward, exerting a firm and healthful influence. Lose no time in this matter. If you would be a free and happy man, you must resist the enemy. . . . {8MR 431.2}[2]
§7
你所需要的是内心的宗教，一颗净化、精炼、超越俗事、持住上帝的心。你要作一名大丈夫。要叫你妻子来到你身旁，要更加熟悉真理，受上帝圣灵的陶冶塑造，这样你就会有平安。如果你行走正直的路，坚定不移地信奉真理，保守自己的心在上帝的爱里，你就会成为主手中拯救你妻子的器皿。反过来说，如果你的妻子接受属天的真理，愿意谦卑温柔地跟从基督，她就会成为上帝手中的工具大大地赐福与你。……{8MR432.1}[3]
§8
What you need is heart-religion, a heart purified, refined, elevated from common things, taking hold upon the divine. Be a man. Call your wife to your side, become better acquainted with the truth, be molded by the Spirit of God, and you will have peace. If you take the right course, if you are unwavering in the truth, if you keep your own soul in the love of God, you will be in the hands of the Lord the means of saving your wife, and in her turn, if she accepts the truth of heavenly origin, if she is a meek and humble follower of Christ, she will be the means in the hands of God of being a great blessing to you. . . . {8MR 432.1}[3]
§9
长时间的谈话对你或对他人都没有益处。那些长谈对任何一个人都没有什么特别的益处。这样花费的时间应该用来查考圣经、默想和恳切祈祷，这会使头脑有活力，使品格稳定。若有人在基督里，他就是新造的人；他就预备好使用自己一切的才能去既照顾身体也照顾心灵，恳切寻求上帝的智慧并受祂的灵指导。工作就会具有拯救身体也拯救心灵的性质。要让这种意识影响你谦卑己心，就是你一生没有一个举动不敞露在一位圣洁上帝无所不见的眼目之下。来自基督的邀请乃是：“凡劳苦担重担的人可以到我这里来，我就使你们得安息”（太11:28）。你接受这个邀请了吗？你的意愿与上帝的旨意一样吗？那时你才会有平安和安息。（《信函》1888年8号第3,4,7页，致G.医生，1888年）{8MR432.2}[4]
§10
It is not profitable to you or to others to engage in long talks. They do no one any special good. The time thus spent should be devoted to a searching of the Scriptures, to meditation and earnest prayer which will give vigor to the mind and stability to the character. If a man be in Christ, he is a new creature; he is prepared to use all his capabilities to minister to the soul as well as to the body, earnestly seeking the wisdom of God and guided by his Spirit. The work will be of a character to the saving of the body and also of the soul. Let this have an influence to humble your heart, that there is not one action of your life that is not open for the all-seeing eye of a holy God. The invitation from Christ is, Come unto me, all ye that are weary and heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Have you accepted this invitation? Is your will as Gods will? Then you will have peace and rest.--Letter 8, 1888, pp. 3, 4, 7. (To Dr. G., 1888.) {8MR 432.2}[4]
§11
上帝有工作要你去做。虽不是公众的工作，但很重要，就是在家里尽一个妻子和母亲的职责。你的工作无人能代替。{8MR433.1}[5]
§12
The Lord has a work for you to do; it is not a public work, but a very important one, a work in your own home, to be true to your position as a wife and mother. No other can do this, your work. {8MR 433.1}[5]
§13
圣灵与上帝的话是一致的。要记住这一点。让我们阅读耶稣基督藉着保罗写给提多的话吧。他奉命“所讲的总要合乎那纯正的道理。劝老年人要有节制、端庄、自守，在信心、爱心、忍耐上都要纯全无疵。又劝老年妇人，举止行动要恭敬，不说谗言，不给酒作奴仆，用善道教训人，好指教少年妇人，爱丈夫，爱儿女，谨守，贞洁，料理家务，待人有恩，顺服自己的丈夫，免得上帝的道理被毁谤”（多2:1-5）。{8MR433.2}[6]
§14
The Spirit and the Word of God agree. Remembering this, let us read the words of inspiration from Jesus Christ through Paul to Titus. He is charged to speak the things which become sound doctrine: That the aged men be sober, grave, temperate, sound in faith, in charity, in patience. The aged women likewise, that they be in behavior as becometh holiness, not false accusers not given to much wine, teachers of good things: that they may teach the young women to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children, to be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the Word of God be not blasphemed. (Titus 2:1-5.) {8MR 433.2}[6]
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根据上面的经文，我问你，你在巴特尔克里克度过的光阴是为了什么？上帝叫你忽略自己的家么？没有。{8MR433.3}[7]
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With this Scripture before you, I ask, For what are you spending your time in Battle Creek? Has God called you to neglect your home? No, no. {8MR 433.3}[7]
§17
我的姊妹，上帝已向我指出你在误解自己的本分。你的丈夫需要你，你的孩子需要母亲。你偏离了基督带领你的道路。祂正在对你说：“来跟从我。”祂会在你自己的家庭义务中引导你。现在这项工作不幸遭到忽略。上帝的声音并没有吩咐你与丈夫和孩子的利益分开。你的首要职责是在家里。主的灵没有给你或使你有资格去做违背祂圣言的工作。……{8MR433.4}[8]
§18
My sister, the Lord has shown me that you are mistaking your duty. Your husband needs you; your children need their mother. You have stepped out of the path where Jesus leads the way. He is saying to you, Follow me, and He will lead you in your own home duties, which are now sadly neglected. The voice of the Lord has not bidden you to separate your interests from that of your husband and children. Your first duty is in the home. The Spirit of the Lord has not given you a work or qualified you to do a work, that is contrary to His own Word. . . . {8MR 433.4}[8]
§19
你有一项伟大的工作，一个庄严圣洁的恩召，就是作为一名忠实的妻子和母亲，表现基督徒的美德，在家庭生活中显出可爱，忍耐，温和而坚定。要学习正确的方法，获得培养孩子的智慧，使他们遵守主的道。要作为上帝谦卑的孩子，在基督的学校里学习，不断设法提高自己的能力，言传身教，在家中成就最完美周到的工作。{8MR434.1}[9]
§20
You have a great work, a sacred, holy calling to exemplify the Christian graces as a faithful wife and mother; to be lovable, patient, kind, yet firm in your home life, to learn right methods and acquire tact for the training of your own little ones, that they may keep the way of the Lord. As a humble child of God, learn in the school of Christ, seek constantly to improve your powers to do the most perfect, thorough work at home, both by precept and example. {8MR 434.1}[9]
§21
在这项工作中，你将得到上帝的帮助。但你若忽略自己做妻子和母亲的职责，伸手求主分派你其他的任务，就要确知祂是不会自相矛盾的。祂向你指出了在家中的责任。如果你以为有一项比这更神圣更重要的工作托付给你，你就上当了。如果你疏忽了丈夫和孩子，去尽你自认的宗教职责，或是参加聚会，或是为他人作工，向别人读圣经，宣讲信息，你就直接违背了保罗指示提多的灵感之言。基督的宗教决不会让一个妻子和母亲做你所做的事情。{8MR434.2}[10]
§22
In this work you will have the help of the Lord; but if you ignore your duty as a wife and mother, and hold out your hands for the Lord to put another class of work in them, be sure that He will not contradict Himself; He points you to the duty you have to do at home. If you have the idea that some work greater and holier than this has been entrusted to you, you are under a deception. In neglecting your husband and children for what you suppose to be religious duties, either to attend meetings or to work for others, to give Bible readings or to have messages for others, you are going directly contrary to the words of inspiration in the instruction of Paul to Titus. The religion of Christ never leads a wife and mother to do as you have done. {8MR 434.2}[10]
§23
你现在可以培养管理家庭的本领，取得良好的效果，因为你的孩子正处在极其需要母亲的年龄。焦躁不安的心情自然会导致淘气。活跃的头脑若不用在更好的事情上，就会去注意撒但的建议。孩子需要母亲的关注。需要教导他们，把他们引到安全的道路上，保守他们远离恶习，用仁慈赢得他们，通过勤劳的训练，养成他们行善的习惯。{8MR434.3}[11]
§24
You may now cultivate the home-making qualities with good effect, for your children are of the age when they most need a mother. The restless spirit naturally inclines to mischief; the active mind, if left unoccupied with better things will give heed to that which Satan may suggest. The children need the watchful eye of the mother. They need to be instructed, to be guided in safe paths, to be kept from vice, to be won by kindness, and be confirmed in well doing, by diligent training. {8MR 434.3}[11]
§25
救主知道每一个灵魂的价值和尊严，因为上面带有上帝的形像。祂曾舍命，为使你的孩子能有永生的恩赐。祂用神圣的怜悯垂顾他们。他们的灵魂可以得救获得永生。他们与其他人是一样宝贵的。上帝并没有呼召你忽略你的家庭、丈夫和孩子。祂从未这样做，也决不会这样做。在你门前有一小片地需要照顾。上帝把这项工作交给你去做，祂必定要你负责。通过恳切的祷告和学习，你会在家中变得有智慧，了解孩子们的不同性情，小心关注他们的行为。家庭里有一所小学校，你将是其中的老师。如果你向上帝求智慧明白祂的道，并且持守祂的道，祂就会引导你不离开你的家，而是回到家里。{8MR435.1}[12]
§26
The Saviour discerns a value and dignity in every soul, because of the image of God which it bears. He died that your children might have the gift of eternal life. He looks upon them with divine compassion. Their souls may be saved unto eternal life, and they are just as precious as the souls of others. The Lord has not called you to neglect your home and your husband and children. He never works in this way; and He never will. You have before your own door a little plot of ground to care for, and God will hold you responsible for this work which He has left in your hands. Through earnest prayer and study, you may become wise in your home, learning the different dispositions of your children, and carefully noting their behavior. You may have at home a little school, of which you shall be the teacher. If you seek wisdom from the Lord to understand His way, and to keep it, He will lead you, not away from your own home, but back to it. {8MR 435.1}[12]
§27
你若是那些是世上的光之人中间的一员，那光就要照耀在你的家中。你家境贫穷，无法摆脱，这并不是罪。但你的思想模式使你用过于强烈的眼光看待一切事物。在这方面你有功课需要在耶稣脚前学习。你需要更多信赖耶稣，更少忧虑。你需要真正相信上帝的应许。然而你应当与上帝同工，培养自己的思维能力，以宁静的精神和仁爱的心对孩子进行教育和训练，在他们心中注入纯洁的志向，培养他们喜爱诚实，纯全和圣洁的事物。{8MR435.2}[13]
§28
If you are one of those who are the light of the world, that light is to shine in your home. Poverty has been your lot, but this you could not help, and it was not sin. But your mind has been of that cast which has led you to view everything in too intense a light. Here you have lessons to learn at the feet of Jesus; you need to trust more to Jesus, and be less anxious; you need to have genuine faith in the promises of God. Yet, you are to be a laborer together with God, cultivating your mind, that you may bring to the education and training of your children a restful spirit, a loving heart, that you may imbue them with pure aspirations, cultivate in them a love for things honest and pure and holy. {8MR 435.2}[13]
§29
片刻也不要认为，上帝分派给你的工作需要你与宝贵的小羊分开。不要让他们结交不良的友伴，硬着心违抗母亲，从而道德败落。这会使你的光以完全错误的方式照耀。你正在使你的儿女更难实现上帝对于他们的旨意和争取他们最终进入天国的愿望。上帝顾念他们。你如果自称是上帝的孩子，也必须顾念他们。{8MR436.1}[14]
§30
Never for a moment suppose that God has given you a work that will necessitate a separation from your precious little flock. Do not leave them to become demoralized by improper associations and to harden their hearts against their mother. This is letting your light shine in a wrong way altogether; you are making it more difficult for your children to become what God would have them and win heaven at last. God cares for them, and so must you if you claim to be His child. {8MR 436.1}[14]
§31
在过去的岁月里，你所犯的错误是过分为孩子们焦虑。你没有完全信赖上帝，反而纵容他们，以致危害了他们的利益。现在你完全不管他们。这是哪种经验呢？肯定不是出于上帝和真理。你在得罪上帝，因为你自称受祂引导，却疏忽了你对于孩子们的责任。……{8MR436.2}[15]
§32
In time past you have erred in having too great an anxiety for your children. Your trust has not been fully in God, and you have indulged them more than was for their good. And now you leave them to themselves. What sort of an experience is this? Certainly it has not God and truth for its source. You are offending God in claiming to be led by Him and yet neglecting your duty to your children. . . . {8MR 436.2}[15]
§33
当我们毫无保留地献身于主时，家庭生活中简单平凡的职责就会显示出其真实重要的意义，我们就会按照上帝的旨意履行这些职责。我的姐妹，你也许被贫穷所困扰，你生活的命运也许卑微，但耶稣不会为此或其他什么原因而放弃你的家人。上帝使你成为家中的受托人和管理人。要为这项工作造就自己。祂必在你旁边赐福你所有的努力。不久以后，当对你所受的托付进行结账的时候，主会对你说：“好，你这又良善又忠心的仆人。”{8MR436.3}[16]
§34
When we give ourselves unreservedly to the Lord, the simple, commonplace duties of home life will be seen in their true importance, and we shall perform them in accordance with the will of God. Oh, my sister, you may be bound about with poverty, your lot in life may be humble, but Jesus does not forsake your family for this or for any other cause. God has made you a trustee, a steward in your home; seek to educate yourself for this work, and He will be by your side to bless all your endeavors, that by and by, when the reckoning time for the administration of your trust shall come, he may say, Well done, thou good and faithful servant. {8MR 436.3}[16]
§35
你丈夫有权利；你孩子也有权利；这些权利你都不可忽视。不论你有一种，三种或五种才干，上帝都已把工作托付给你。父母们可怕地忽略了他们在家中的责任，没有满足圣经的标准。但对于那些放弃自己的家、伴侣和孩子的人，上帝不会将救灵的工作委托他们，因他们对他们圣洁的誓约和神圣的责任表现出不忠。上帝不会把永恒的财富托付给他们。……{8MR436.4}[17]
§36
Your husband has rights; your children have rights; and these must not be ignored by you. Whether you have one talent or three or five, God has given you your work. Parents are fearfully neglectful of their home duties. They do not meet the Bible standard. But to those who forsake their homes, their companions and children, God will not entrust the work of saving souls, for they have proved unfaithful to their holy vows. They have proved unfaithful to sacred responsibilities. God will not entrust to them eternal riches. . . . {8MR 436.4}[17]
§37
基督徒母亲的工作是从家庭范围里开始的。她把家庭安排成应有的样子，令丈夫和孩子们舒适。她手中的这些亲人需要忠心地教育。……{8MR437.1}[18]
§38
The Christian mothers work begins in the home circle, in making her home what it should be, pleasant to her husband, pleasant to her children. These dear ones are in her hands to educate faithfully. . . . {8MR 437.1}[18]
§39
责骂与烦躁，使人的心头乌云密布，会将阴影和沮丧带入家庭生活。做母亲的一点儿也不重视自己的潜在价值和特权。她们似乎不明白自己能在最高意义的传道工作中与上帝同工，帮助儿女建立匀称的品格。这是上帝交托她们的重大责任。母亲是上帝的代表，要使她的家庭基督化。她要例证圣经的宗教，表明它的影响如何在日常的职责和乐趣中控制我们，教导她的孩子们单单因着信心靠着恩典才能得救，信心乃是上帝的恩赐。如此不断地教导有关基督对于我们和他们的意义，以及祂在伟大的救赎计划中所显示的慈爱、良善和怜悯，将会在心中留下神圣庄严的印象。{8MR437.2}[19]
§40
Scolding and fretting, gathering clouds and gloom about the soul, will bring only a shadow and discouragement in the home life. Mothers do not half appreciate their possibilities and privileges. They do not seem to understand that they can be in the highest sense missionaries, laborers together with God in aiding their children to build up a symmetrical character. This is the great burden of the work given them of God. The mother is Gods agent to Christianize her family. She is to exemplify Bible religion, showing how its influence is to control us in its everyday duties and pleasures, teaching her children that by grace alone can they be saved, through faith, which is the gift of God. This constant teaching as to what Christ is to us, and to them, His love, His goodness, His mercy, revealed in the great plan of redemption, will make a hallowed, sacred impress on the heart. {8MR 437.2}[19]
§41
你不要脱口说出一句烦躁、刺耳或怒气冲冲的话。基督的恩典正等着你的需要。祂的灵会控制你的心和良心，主管你的言语和行为。决不要因轻率欠考虑的话而丧失自尊。要留心使你的言语纯净，谈吐圣洁。要给你的儿女树立你希望他们成为的榜样。（《信函》1890年28号，致V.姐妹，1890年7月1日）{8MR437.3}[20]
§42
Let not one word of fretfulness, harshness or passion escape your lips. The grace of Christ awaits your demand. His Spirit will take control of your heart and conscience, presiding over your words and deeds. Never forfeit your self-respect by hasty, thoughtless words. See that your words are pure, your conversation holy. Give your children an example of that which you wish them to be.--Letter 28, 1890. (To Sister V., July 1, 1890.) {8MR 437.3}[20]
§43
信靠上帝对你来说很重要。很遗憾在你居住的地方很少得到宗教方面的鼓励。许多人愿意对你说同情的话，但他们却不能给饥渴的心灵带来安慰。这颗心受了伤，需要医治的药膏。决不要忘记你的救赎主活着执掌王权。你必须紧紧抓住上帝的应许。在基督教的信仰方面，人间的教师太少了。{8MR438.1}[21]
§44
It is essential for you to put your trust in God. I am sorry that in the place where you live, you have so little encouragement in religious lines. There are many who will give you words of sympathy, but they do not bring comfort to the longing, hungry soul, which is bruised and wounded, and which needs the healing balm. Never forget that your Saviour lives and reigns. Your grasp on the divine promises must be strong. Human teachers in Christian faith are few. {8MR 438.1}[21]
§45
你也许几乎灰心沮丧了。你屈服于试探，忽略了自己的宗教职责，回避背负十架的基督徒生活。你也许赞同被属世的原则和情感所支配，忽略了祈祷和向基督认罪。如果你是这样的话，就不要再继续了。要记住基督的话：“你们是我的见证。”你的光也许摇曳不定，但是感谢上帝，现在承认主对你的要求还不太晚。{8MR438.2}[22]
§46
You may have felt almost discouraged, and may have yielded to the temptation to neglect your religious duties, to shun the cross-bearing life of a Christian; you may have consented to be governed by worldly principles and sentiments, you may have neglected prayer, neglected to confess Christ. If you have done this, do so no more. Remember the words of Christ, Ye are my witnesses. Your light may have been flickering, but thank God, it is not too late, even now, to acknowledge the claims the Lord has upon you. {8MR 438.2}[22]
§47
你是耶稣基督的产业。祂用无限的代价赎买了你归祂自己。因着创造和救赎，你是属于祂的。虽然有时你对天国的盼望可能飘摇不定，但你知道你信赖的是谁。你天国的盼望只靠赖耶稣基督的功劳。你现在可以在属上帝的事上获得活泼的经验。凭着信心仰望基督，依靠祂的功劳，你对祂爱的怀疑就会就像露水在早晨的太阳面前那样消散。{8MR438.3}[23]
§48
You are the property of Jesus Christ. He has purchased you at an infinite cost to Himself. His you are by creation and by redemption. Although to you your hope of heaven may be at times uncertain, yet you know in whom to trust. Your hope of heaven is found alone in the merits of Jesus Christ. You may now gain a living experience in the things of God. Looking unto Jesus by faith, trusting in His merits, doubts of His love will vanish as dew before the morning sun. {8MR 438.3}[23]
§49
要充分完全地降服于上帝，片时也不犹豫。现在要充分利用你的宽容时期，不论是长是短。你一毫无保留地投靠耶稣基督，祂就接纳你。不要以任何方式隐瞒你已选择真理的事实，以及这个选择会带来的一切不便。……{8MR439.1}[24]
§50
Let your surrender to God be full and complete; wait not one day or hour. Make the most now of your probationary time, be it longer or shorter. Just as soon as you cast yourself unreservedly upon Jesus Christ, He accepts you. Do not in any way conceal the fact that you have chosen truth, and all the inconveniences that this choice will involve. . . . {8MR 439.1}[24]
§51
在任何环境下，即使是在表面上，也不要同意离开那为主的赎民行在其间而修筑的道路。对基督徒的义务和你的上帝要坚定不移。……{8MR439.2}[25]
§52
Never, under any circumstances, even in appearance, consent to leave the path cast up for the ransomed of the Lord to walk in. Be steadfast, immovable to Christian obligations and to your God. . . . {8MR 439.2}[25]
§53
我劝你对上帝履行基督徒的义务。即使在一百英里的范围内没有一个人遵守安息日，全宇宙也是站在你一边的。基督你的救主和天使在你周围。如果你愿意在每一次需要的时候求告上帝，祂就会帮助你。要在家中实行真理。“耶和华说：你们是我的见证”（赛43:10）。{8MR439.3}[26]
§54
I urge upon you to fulfill your Christian obligations to God. If there is no one within a hundred miles of you who observes the Sabbath, the whole universe of heaven is in sympathy with you. Christ your Saviour and the heavenly angels are round about you. If you will call upon God in every time of need. He will be your helper. Practice the truth in your home. Ye are my witnesses, saith the Lord. {8MR 439.3}[26]
§55
但我不能再写了。如果你爱你孩子们的父亲，就要在任何时间、任何环境下过基督徒的生活。如果你曾这样做，上帝原会为你做工。然而当你取悦自己，而令你的天父不悦时，主还怎么能为你做工呢？{8MR439.4}[27]
§56
But I am not able to write you more. If you love the father of your children, live the life of a Christian at all times and under all circumstances. If you had done this, God would have worked in your behalf. But when you please yourself, and displease your heavenly Father, how can the Lord work in your behalf? {8MR 439.4}[27]
§57
愿上帝帮助你——我可怜的，亲爱的，受试探的姊妹——现在就选择正确的道路。愿祂帮助你对你的丈夫和孩子见证你是实际的基督徒，你爱上帝，你爱耶稣，祂曾为你舍命。“你的日子如何，你的力量也必如何”（申33:25）。（《信函》1896年76号，致G.姐妹，1896年8月1日）{8MR439.5}[28]
§58
May the Lord help you, my poor, dear tempted one, to choose the right way just now. May He help you to give your husband and children a testimony that you are a Christian in practice, that you love God, that you love Jesus, who gave His life for you. And as your day is, so shall your strength be.-- Letter 76, 1896. (To Sister G., August 1, 1896.) {8MR 439.5}[28]
§59
为了向上帝献上完全的侍奉，你需要接受这个邀请：“凡劳苦担重担的人可以到我这里来，我就使你们得安息”（太11:28）。你没有始终采取会保证你得到上帝赐福的做法。你希望基督持久临格在你的家庭中吗？那么你就必须顺从这道：“负我的轭，学我的样式”（太11:29）。当你负起基督约束和顺从的轭时，你才会凭个人经验得享安息。要负起基督的轭，而不是你自己制造的轭，你自造的轭总是难堪的。祂说：“这样，你们心里就必得享安息。因为我的轭是容易的，我的担子是轻省的”（太11:30）。要在基督的学校中完全地学习内心柔和谦卑的功课。要设法遵行祂的旨意，荣耀祂的名。……{8MR440.1}[29]
§60
In order to render to God perfect service you need to accept the invitation, Come unto me, all ye that labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. You have not always pursued the course that will ensure to you the blessing of God. Do you want the abiding presence of Christ in your family? Then you must obey the Word, Take my yoke upon you, and learn of me. As you take upon you Christs yoke of restraint and obedience, you will by individual experience find rest. Lift Christs yoke, not a yoke of your own manufacture, which will always be galling. Ye shall find rest unto your soul, He declares. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light. In Christs school learn perfectly the lessons of meekness and lowliness of heart. Seek to do His will and to glorify His name. . . . {8MR 440.1}[29]
§61
我们访问你的那天，享受了你为我们预备的丰盛宴席。但你需要学习如何用最简单的方法预备营养的食物。你丈夫关于预备食物的心愿需要尊重。但你仍可学习用尽可能简单健康的方法预备可口的食物，使大脑的神经不致衰弱麻痹，造成你容易激动，紧张，很容易被激怒。……{8MR440.2}[30]
§62
The day we visited you we appreciated much the bountiful repast prepared for us. But you need to study how to prepare nutritious food in the most simple way. Your husbands wishes regarding the preparation of food should be respected, and still you may study to prepare appetizing dishes in as simple and healthful a way as possible, so that the fine nerves of the brain will not become weakened and paralyzed, making you excitable, nervous, and easily provoked. . . . {8MR 440.2}[30]
§63
我亲爱的姐妹，你在家中负有责任。要用智慧稳健的手管好家庭的事务。不要让家庭的成员失去对你的爱和尊重。你可以用慈绳爱索将他们系在你的心头。你若是过亲近耶稣的生活就能做到这一点。藉着仰望祂，你就会变成祂的形像，脱离世上从情欲而来的败坏。上帝爱你。祂爱你的丈夫。祂正在吸引他归向祂。祂希望你将你丈夫的注意力从地上的事物转移到永恒的财富上。（《信函》1900年145号，致K.姐妹，1900年11月8日）{8MR440.3}[31]
§64
My dear sister, you stand in a responsible position in your home. Hold the reins of government with a wise, even hand. Do not allow the members of your family to lose their love and respect for you. Bind them to your heart with the silken cords of love. This you can do if you live close to Jesus. By beholding Him you will be changed into His image, having escaped the corruption that is in the world through lust. God loves you; He loves your husband, and He is seeking to draw him to Himself. He desires to take his attention off mere earthly enterprises, and fix them on the eternal riches. --Letter 145, 1900. (To Sister K., November 8, 1900.) {8MR 440.3}[31]
§65
我的姐妹，我们的救主很愿意在你需要的时候帮助你。不要不信任祂，不要把你的困难带到人那里。把它们带给主吧。你也许以为别人会同情你沮丧的情绪，但你有时会失望。耶稣决不会让向祂求助的人失望。{8MR441.1}[32]
§66
My sister, our Saviour is a present help in every time of need. Do not distrust Him. Do not take your troubles to human beings. Take them to the Lord. You may think that others should sympathize with you in your downcast feelings, but you will sometimes be disappointed. Jesus never disappoints one who comes to Him for help. {8MR 441.1}[32]
§67
你犯错误了吗？到耶稣那里去，求祂赦免你，然后就相信祂确实赦免你了。“我们若认自己的罪，上帝是信实的，是公义的，必要赦免我们的罪，洗净我们一切的不义”（约壹1:9）。求主赦免你的过错，然后在祂里面喜乐。一直为你的缺点悲哀对你毫无帮助。要说：“主啊，我将我无助的心灵投靠祢，惟独投靠祢。我不要担心，因为你说过：‘你们求，就必得着’”（约16:24）。要相信你确实得着了。相信你的救主满有怜悯，满有温柔的同情和慈爱。不要让小小的灾祸骚扰你。上帝让你遭遇小错误，是为了救你脱离更大的错误。{8MR441.2}[33]
§68
Are you one that makes mistakes? Go to Jesus, and ask Him to forgive you, and then believe that He does. If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness. Ask the Lord to pardon your errors. Then rejoice in Him. It will not help you in the least to keep mourning over your defects. Say, Lord, I cast my helpless soul on Thee, and Thee alone. I will not worry, because Thou hast said, Ask, and ye shall receive. Believe that you do receive. Believe that your Saviour is full of compassion, full of tender pity and love. Let not little mishaps trouble you. Small mistakes may be ordered by the Lord to save you from making larger mistakes. {8MR 441.2}[33]
§69
要尽你自助的本分，象一切会蒙福的人都必须做的那样。要相信基督帮助你。不要说一句不信的话，当仇敌对你说，上帝已经抛弃了你的时候，告诉他你知道主没有这样做；因为祂说：“我来本不是召义人悔改，乃是召罪人悔改”（路5:32）。{8MR441.3}[34]
§70
Act your part in helping yourself, as all must do who would be blessed. Believe that Christ helps you. Refuse to speak a word of unbelief. When the enemy tells you that the Lord has forsaken you, tell him that you know He has not; for He declares, I came not to call the righteous, but sinners to repentance. {8MR 441.3}[34]
§71
耶稣说：“凡父所赐给我的人必到我这里来；到我这里来的，我总不丢弃他”（约6:37）。那么，我的姐妹，要让仇敌离开。告诉他，你不会羞辱上帝，怀疑祂的怜悯、良善和慈爱。决不要与撒但争辩，因为他有惊人的欺骗能力。当他来到亚当夏娃面前的时候，他们若始终重述上帝的话，说：“主已说过，而我相信祂的话，我不会不信任祂，”就原本不会被战胜。{8MR441.4}[35]
§72
Jesus says, Him that cometh to Me I will in no wise cast out. Then, my sister, dismiss the enemy. Tell him that you will not dishonor God by doubting His mercy, His goodness, His love. Never argue with Satan; for he has wonderful powers of deception. If, when he went to Adam and Eve, they had kept repeating the words of God, saying, He hath said, and I believe His word, I will not distrust Him, they would not have been overcome. {8MR 441.4}[35]
§73
不要怨叹你的弱点，说不信的话，觉得自己怀才不遇，开始唱歌吧。要谈论上帝的怜悯与慈爱。基督对所有劳苦担重担的人发出邀请说：“到我这里来，我就使你们得安息。我心里柔和谦卑，你们当负我的轭，学我的样式；这样，你们心里就必得享安息。因为我的轭是容易的，我的担子是轻省的”（太11:28-30）。这是耶稣希望你学习的功课。通过学习这功课，你就会得到安息。{8MR442.1}[36]
§74
Instead of bemoaning your weakness, and talking unbelief, and feeling that you are hardly used, begin to sing. Talk of the mercy and love of God. To all who labor and are heavy laden Christ gives the invitation, Come unto Me, . . . and I will give you rest. Take My yoke upon you, and learn of Me; for I am meek and lowly in heart, and ye shall find rest unto your souls. For My yoke is easy, and My burden is light. This is the lesson that Christ desires you to learn, and in learning it you will find rest. {8MR 442.1}[36]
§75
当人对你说灰心的话时，不要轻易还口，除非你能报以令人愉快的回答。当你受到不仁之言的考验和试探时，不要报复。要对自己说，“我不愿让我的救主失望。”每一个男基督徒都是绅士。每一个女基督徒都是淑女。仁慈的法则总是在女基督徒的口中。她不说急躁的话。你在受到刺激的时候说温柔的话，会把阳光带进你的心灵，且会使你的道路更加平坦。一位女学生在回答一个问题的时候说，“温柔的人是那些用和气的话回应刁难问题的人。”基督说：“温柔的人有福了！因为他们必承受地土”（太5:5）。他们乐于受教，所以他们会成为适合天国的国民。{8MR442.2}[37]
§76
When discouraging words are spoken to you, do not reply unless you can return a pleasant answer. When you are tried and tempted by unkind words, do not retaliate. Say to yourself, I will not disappoint my Saviour. Every man who is a Christian is a gentleman; and every woman who is a Christian is a gentlewoman. The law of kindness is ever on the lips of the Christian woman. She utters no hasty words. To speak gentle words when you feel irritated will bring sunshine into your heart, and will make your path more smooth. A school girl, in answer to a question, said, meek people are those who give soft answers to rough questions. Christ says, Blessed are the meek; for they shall inherit the earth. They will be fit subjects for the kingdom of heaven; because they are willing to be taught. {8MR 442.2}[37]
§77
你说你的丈夫现在还没有转变归向真理。那就在你的生活中向他表显接受基督话语的好处吧。藉着忍耐，宽容，仁慈，你可以争取你的丈夫归向救主。{8MR442.3}[38]
§78
You say that your husband is not yet converted to the truth. Show him in your life the advantage of taking Christ at His word. By patience, forbearance, and kindness you may win your husband to the Saviour. {8MR 442.3}[38]
§79
靠着上帝恩典的能力，你能获得最宝贵的胜利。不要将生活看做浪漫的事，而要看作现实。你要与上帝同工，塑造祂能悦纳的品格。“当恐惧战兢做成你们得救的工夫。”这个命令到此为止了吗？没有，感谢上帝！“因为你们立志行事，都是上帝在你们心里运行，为要成就祂的美意”（腓2:12,13）。你要与上帝同工拯救你的灵魂。你要乐意遵行上帝的旨意。那么就不要把光阴和精力花在埋怨上，说不信的话，寻找上帝的过错。而要鼓励对祂的信任，说称颂祂的话，尊重祂。因为祂“爱世人，甚至将祂的独生子赐给他们，叫一切信祂的，不至灭亡，反得永生”（约3:16）。{8MR443.1}[39]
§80
In the power of Gods grace you may obtain most precious victories. You are not to treat your life as a romance, but as a reality. You are to labor together with God in forming a character that He can approve. Work out your own salvation with fear and trembling. Does the charge end there? No, no, thank God! For it is God that worketh in you, both to will and to do of His good pleasure. You are to be a co-worker with Him in the saving of your soul. You are to will to do the will of God. Then do not spend your time and strength in murmuring, in talking unbelief and finding fault with God. Encourage confidence in Him. Speak kindly of Him. Honor Him who so loved the world, that He gave His only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in Him should not perish, but have everlasting life. {8MR 443.1}[39]
§81
要本着敬畏上帝和爱上帝的心，保证忠实愉快地履行自己最小的职责。上帝宣布说：“人在最小的事上忠心，在大事上也忠心；在最小的事上不义，在大事上也不义”（路16:10）。要忠心地履行你在家中的责任，然后将自己交在上帝手中，说：“我把我的心交给祂保守。我不会把安排我生活的权利从祂手中拿走。我会把自己交给祂保守。”{8MR443.2}[40]
§82
Be sure to perform your smallest duties in the fear and love of God, with faithfulness and cheerfulness. God declares, He that is faithful in that which is least is faithful also in much. Faithfully discharge your home duties, and then leave yourself with God, saying, I commit the keeping of my soul to Him. I will not take the ordering of my life out of His hands. I will leave myself in His keeping. {8MR 443.2}[40]
§83
要研究基督在地上的生活。祂从不轻视落在身上的最小、最简单的职责。祂所做的一切都尽善尽美。要向耶稣求助，而这能使你以寻求不朽的生命冠冕者的优雅和尊严，履行你日常的职责。……{8MR443.3}[41]
§84
Study the life that Christ lived while on this earth. He did not disregard the simplest, smallest duty that fell to Him. Perfection marked all that He did. Look to Jesus for His help, and this will enable you to perform your daily duties with the grace and dignity of one who is seeking for a crown of immortal life. . . . {8MR 443.3}[41]
§85
上帝对你和所有其他基督徒的希望，就是实行自己的信仰，表明基督的话语是真实的，表明祂能保守人远离罪恶。要让你的生活与祂纯全，优美，圣洁的生活保持一致。要顺从祂的诫命。这会带给你实际的敬虔。{8MR443.4}[42]
§86
All that God expects of you and all other Christians is that you live out your profession. Show that Christs word is true, that He can keep human beings from sin. Conform your life to His pure, beautiful, holy life. Obey His commandments. This will bring you practical godliness. {8MR 443.4}[42]
§87
不要专注于基督徒生活的艰辛。不要谈论你的试炼。否则你会变得越来越想埋怨上帝。要讲说基督的爱，并把这种爱带到你的内心和生活中。要感谢上帝保留了你的性命，使你不致被剪除，而没有为进入天国作好准备，那里没有罪恶，没有忧愁。你只有一生用来完善基督徒的品格。如果你在自己的品格中彰显上帝的恩典，如果仁慈的法则常在你口中，如果你不断感谢上帝待你的良善，你就是在预备到天家赞美祂了。（《信函》1903年72号，致W.姐妹，1903年4月28日）1978年10月26日发布。{8MR444.1}[43]
§88
Do not dwell upon the hardships of the Christian life. Do not talk of your trials; for if you do, you will become more and more inclined to complain of God. Talk of the love of Christ, bringing it into your heart and life. Be thankful that the Lord has spared you, that you have not been cut off without having gained a preparation for entrance into the heavenly kingdom, where there is no sin, no sorrow. You have only one life in which to perfect a Christian character. If you reveal the grace of God in your character, if the law of kindness is ever on your lips, if you constantly thank the Lord for His goodness to you, you are preparing to praise Him in the home above.--Letter 72, 1903. (To Sister W., April 28, 1903.) Released October 26, 1978. {8MR 444.1}[43]