第32章 迷恋和盲目的爱
§1
第32章 迷恋和盲目的爱
§2
Chapter 32—Infatuation and Blind Love
§3
（见第五编《生命的活化力量》）
§4
恋爱需要有良好的常识——青年人太相信感情的冲动了。他们不应轻易决定自己的终生大事，也不应太容易被恋人动人的外表所迷惑。现代的恋爱方式，有其欺骗伪善的一面，与人类的仇敌有关，而与上帝无关。在这个问题上，非常需要理性，但人们做事却很少出于理性。--RH,1886年1月26日.(MYP450.){1MCP 295.1}[1]
§5
[See Section V, “Life’s Energizing Force.”]
§6
Courtship—Good Common Sense Needed—The youth trust altogether too much to impulse. They should not give themselves away too easily or be captivated too readily by the winning exterior of the lover. Courtship, as carried on in this age, is a scheme of deception and hypocrisy, with which the enemy of souls has far more to do than the Lord. Good common sense is needed here if anywhere; but the fact is, it has little to do in the matter.—The Review and Herald, January 26, 1886. (Messages to Young People, 450.)?{1MCP 295.1}[1]
§7
要培养最高尚的情操——他们的恋爱观是以错误的婚姻观为基础的。他们随从情感的冲动和盲目的激情。他们以轻佻的精神恋爱。情侣们往往破坏了礼貌和克制的规则，即使不干犯上帝的律法，也有失检点。他们忽视了上帝设立婚姻制度的崇高旨意，所以无法培育心中最纯洁的感情和最高尚的情操。--MS4a,1885.(MM141.){1MCP 295.2}[2]
§8
Noblest Traits to Be Developed—The ideas of courtship have their foundation in erroneous ideas concerning marriage. They follow impulse and blind passion. The courtship is carried on in a spirit of flirtation. The parties frequently violate the rules of modesty and reserve and are guilty of indiscretion, if they do not break the law of God. The high, noble, lofty design of God in the institution of marriage is not discerned; therefore the purest affections of the heart, the noblest traits of character, are not developed.—Manuscript 4a, 1885.?(Medical Ministry, 141.)?{1MCP 295.2}[2]
§9
纯洁的感情是属天的，而不是属地的——凡是你不希望圣洁的天使在旁观察并记在天上册子的任何话都不要说，任何事都不要做。你应当专心仰望上帝的荣耀，心中只可怀有一种圣洁的感情，与基督徒的身份相称，其性质是崇高的，是属天的，而不是属地的。凡与此相违的恋爱都是庸俗堕落的。婚姻若不遵循圣经崇高的原则，在纯洁圣善的上帝看来都不能算为圣洁尊贵的。--MS4a,1885.(MM141.){1MCP 296.1}[3]
§10
Pure Affection More Heavenly Than Earthly—Not one word should be spoken, not one action performed, that you would not be willing the holy angels should look upon and register in the books above. You should have an eye single to the glory of God. The heart should have only pure, sanctioned affection, worthy of the followers of Jesus Christ, exalting in its nature, and more heavenly than earthly. Anything different from this is debasing, degrading in courtship; and marriage cannot be holy and honorable in the sight of a pure and holy God unless it is after the exalted Scriptural principle.—Manuscript 4a, 1885.?(Medical Ministry, 141.)?{1MCP 296.1}[3]
§11
谈情说爱至深夜的危险——谈情说爱至深夜的习惯不蒙上帝所悦纳，即使你们俩都是基督徒。这种不合时宜的做法有损于健康，使你不能胜任次日的工作，容貌憔悴。我的弟兄，我希望你要自尊，避免这样的恋爱方式。你若专心仰望上帝的荣耀，就能谨慎行事，不会意乱情迷到看不清上帝对你这个基督徒的崇高要求。--3T44,45(1872).{1MCP 296.2}[4]
§12
Danger of Late Hours—The habit of sitting up late at night is customary; but it is not pleasing to God, even if you are both Christians. These untimely hours injure health, unfit the mind for the next day’s duties, and have an appearance of evil. My brother, I hope you will have self-respect enough to shun this form of courtship. If you have an eye single to the glory of God you will move with deliberate caution. You will not suffer love-sick sentimentalism to so blind your vision that you cannot discern the high claims that God has upon you as a Christian.—Testimonies for the Church 3:44, 45 (1872).?{1MCP 296.2}[4]
§13
热恋不是婚姻牢固的基础——在这邪恶的世代中，深夜放荡的时辰，往往造成双方的沦丧。男女的不自尊，使上帝受到了羞辱，撒但则得意洋洋。他们的名誉牺牲在意乱情迷之中。他们的婚约没有在上帝的嘉纳之下庄严订立。结婚是出于感情的冲动。但在新鲜感过去之后，他们才对自己的作为恍然大悟。--RH,1888年9月25日.(AH56.){1MCP 296.3}[5]
§14
Infatuation a Poor Ground for Marriage—These hours of midnight dissipation, in this age of depravity, frequently lead to the ruin of both parties thus engaged. Satan exults and God is dishonored when men and women dishonor themselves. The good name of honor is sacrificed under the spell of this infatuation, and the marriage of such persons cannot be solemnized under the approval of God. They are married because passion moved them, and when the novelty of the affair is over, they will begin to realize what they have done.—The Review and Herald, September 25, 1888. (The Adventist Home, 56.)?{1MCP 296.3}[5]
§15
虚伪的爱无法控制——那种仅以肉欲的满足为基础的爱必是刚愎、盲目、无法控制的。尊荣、真理和心智的每一高尚能力都成了情欲的奴隶。被这种迷恋所捆绑的人往往听不见理智和良心的声音；争辩和恳劝也不能使他看出自己的行径是愚妄的。--ST,1903年7月1日.(AH51.){1MCP 296.4}[6]
§16
Counterfeit Love Uncontrollable—That love which has no better foundation than mere sensual gratification?will be headstrong, blind, and uncontrollable. Honor, truth, and every noble, elevated power of the mind are brought under the slavery of passions. The man who is bound in the chains of this infatuation is too often deaf to the voice of reason and conscience; neither argument nor entreaty can lead him to see the folly of his course.—The Signs of the Times, July 1, 1903. (The Adventist Home, 51.)?{1MCP 296.4}[6]
§17
不圣洁的爱误导人——人间不圣洁的爱情总是误导人，因为它招呼人踏上异路，与上帝所指出的道路不同。--Lt34,1891.{1MCP 297.1}[7]
§18
Unsanctified Love Misleads—Unsanctified human affection always misleads, for it beckons in other paths than the way God has pointed out.—Letter 34, 1891.?{1MCP 297.1}[7]
§19
一再犯罪会减低抵抗罪恶的力量——人若一次为试探所胜，第二次就更容易屈服了。人一再地犯罪，就必减低自己抵抗罪恶的力量，并使自己成为盲目冥顽的人。每一次的纵欲就如一粒种子，必要结出它的果实来。上帝也不会行什么神迹来制止这种后果的。--PP268(1890).{1MCP 297.2}[8]
§20
Repetition of Sin Lessens Powers of Resistance—He who has once yielded to temptation will yield more readily the second time. Every repetition of the sin lessens his power of resistance, blinds his eyes, and stifles conviction. Every seed of indulgence sown will bear fruit. God works no miracle to prevent the harvest.—Patriarchs and Prophets, 268 (1890).?{1MCP 297.2}[8]
§21
情欲摧毁一切——应该始终将基督的话记在心里：“挪亚的日子怎样，人子的日子也要怎样。那时候的人又吃又喝”（路17:26,27）。食欲左右了这时代之人的思想和良心。暴食、贪杯、饮酒、吸烟普遍盛行，但跟从基督的人却要在吃喝上节制。他们不会以健康和属灵的成长为代价去放纵食欲。{1MCP 297.3}[9]
§22
Passion Destroys Everything—The words of Christ should ever be borne in mind: “As it was in the days of Noah, so shall it be also in the days of the Son of man. They did eat, they drank” (Luke 17:26, 27). Appetite bears sway over mind and conscience in this age. Gluttony, winebibbing, liquor drinking, tobacco using prevail, but Christ’s followers will be temperate in eating and drinking. They will not indulge appetite at the expense of health and spiritual growth.?{1MCP 297.3}[9]
§23
他们“又娶又嫁，到挪亚进方舟的那日，洪水就来，把他们全都灭了”（路17:27）。我们看到在婚姻的问题上人们有同样的表现。青年人，甚至是成年男女，本应明智而审慎地行事，在这个问题上竟如着了魔一般。撒但的势力似乎要控制他们了。他们结成了最不理智的婚姻。他们没有请教上帝。人的感觉、欲望和激情将眼前的一切全都压倒，直到木已成舟。这种婚姻的结果是说不尽的痛苦。上帝遭到了羞辱。婚约掩盖了各种淫荡的可憎之事。在这个问题上难道不需要作出彻底的改变吗？--Lt74,1896.(SpTMWI41.){1MCP 297.4}[10]
§24
“They married wives, they were given in marriage, until the day that Noah entered into the ark, and the flood came, and destroyed them all” (verse 27). We see the same manifestation now in regard to marriage. Youth, and even men and women who ought to be wise and discerning, act as if bewitched upon this question. A satanic power seems to take possession of them. The most indiscreet marriages are formed. God is not consulted. Human feelings, desires, and passions bear down?everything before them, until the die is cast. Untold misery is the result of this state of things, and God is dishonored. The marriage vow covers every kind of lustful abomination. Shall there not be a decided change in reference to this matter?—?Letter 74, 1896. (Special Testimony to the Managers and Workers in our Institutions 1898, 22.)?{1MCP 297.4}[10]
§25
盲目相恋影响一切机能——人一染上这种盲目相恋的传染病，一切机能就都受到影响。他们似乎缺少良好的判断力，他们的行径令人厌恶。我的弟兄啊，你已经成了别人的话题，也降低了你应该重视其赞许的人对你的评价{1MCP 298.1}[11]
§26
Blind Love Affects Every Faculty—Every faculty of those who become affected by this contagious disease—blind love—is brought in subjection to it. They seem to be devoid of good sense, and their course of action is disgusting to all who behold it. My brother, you have made yourself a subject of talk and have lowered yourself in the estimation of those whose approval you should prize.?{1MCP 298.1}[11]
§27
许多人这种病症的危机已达到早婚的地步。当爱情的魅力和新鲜感消失之后，一方或双方意识到他们的真情实况，才发现他们并不般配，无奈已结下终身之约。{1MCP 298.2}[12]
§28
With many the crisis of the disease is reached in an immature marriage, and when the novelty is past and the bewitching power of lovemaking is over, one or both parties awake to their true situation. They then find themselves ill-mated, but united for life.?{1MCP 298.2}[12]
§29
双方均被最严肃的盟约所束缚，只得以颓丧的心情熬受他们必过的不幸一生。这时，他们当尽量利用好自己的境况，可是多数人却不愿这样作。他们要么背弃自己的婚约，要么使加在自己颈项上的轭痛苦难当。不少懦怯的人因而结束了自己的生命。--5T110,111(1882).{1MCP 298.3}[13]
§30
Bound to each other by the most solemn vows, they look with sinking hearts upon the miserable life they must lead. They ought then to make the best of their situation; but many will not do this. They will either prove false to their marriage vows or make the yoke which they persisted in placing upon their own necks so very galling that not a few cowardly put an end to their existence.—Testimonies for the Church 5:110, 111 (1882).?{1MCP 298.3}[13]
§31
十几岁青年的早恋——一般而言，撒但控制着青年人的思想。你们的女儿们并未受教养成克己自制的习惯。她们受宠爱，心骄气傲。你们容许她们自行其事，直到她们变得顽梗悖逆，刚愎自负，而你们无计可施，一筹莫展，不知该如何拯救她们脱离灭亡。因为她们胆大妄为，缺少女性的端庄与贞洁，于是撒但使她们成了不信之人口中的笑柄。{1MCP 298.4}[14]
§32
Early Teenage Love—Satan controls the minds of the youth in general. Your daughters are not taught self-denial and self-control. They are petted, and their pride is fostered. They are allowed to have their own way until they become headstrong and self-willed, and you are put to your wit’s end to know what course to pursue to save them from ruin. Satan is leading them on to be a proverb in the mouth of unbelievers because of their boldness, their lack of reserve and womanly modesty.?{1MCP 298.4}[14]
§33
你们的儿子也是无法无天。他们还没有进入青春期，便开始陪伴同龄的小女孩回家，并与之谈情说爱了。因为父母从小娇惯溺爱他们的儿女，以致他们不敢采取坚决手段改正儿女的错误行为，并在这个放荡的世代中约束他们发育过快的儿女。--2T460(1870).{1MCP 298.5}[15]
§34
The young boys are likewise left to have their own way. They have scarcely entered their teens before they?are by the side of little girls of their own age, accompanying them home and making love to them. And the parents are so completely in bondage through their own indulgence and mistaken love for their children that they dare not pursue a decided course to make a change and restrain their too-fast children in this fast age.—Testimonies for the Church 2:460 (1870).?{1MCP 298.5}[15]
§35
暗中相恋——有许多教训是青年需要学习的，其中最重要的是学习认识自己。他们应当正确地认识自己对父母所应负的责任和本分，在基督学校里不断学习如何心里柔和谦卑。他们如果敬爱孝顺自己的父母，也就必尊重教会中有经验之人的看法了。{1MCP 299.1}[16]
§36
Clandestine Courtships—The young have many lessons to learn, and the most important one is to learn to know themselves. They should have correct ideas of their obligations and duties to their parents and should be constantly learning in the school of Christ to be meek and lowly of heart. While they are to love and honor their parents, they are also to respect the judgment of men of experience with whom they are connected in the church.?{1MCP 299.1}[16]
§37
一个男青年与一个女青年来往交友，却背着她的父母，他就没有对她的父母履行高尚的基督徒本分。通过秘密的来往和约会，他可以赢得姑娘的芳心，但是他这样做，没有表现出上帝的儿女所应有的高贵与正直。为了达到自己的目的，他们没有光明磊落地按圣经的标准行事，这就表明他们对那些爱他们并忠实监护他们的人不诚实。在这样的情况之下，他们订立的婚约是不符合圣经的。人若引诱一个女子离开本分，使她对孝敬父母的上帝明令模糊不清，他也就不会忠实于婚姻的义务了。--RH,1886年1月26日.(FE101,102.){1MCP 299.2}[17]
§38
A young man who enjoys the society and wins the friendship of a young lady, unbeknown to her parents, does not act a noble Christian part toward her or toward her parents. Through secret communications and meetings he may gain an influence over her mind; but in so doing he fails to manifest that nobility and integrity of soul which every child of God will possess. In order to accomplish their ends they act a part that is not frank and open and according to the Bible standard, and prove themselves untrue to those who love them and try to be faithful guardians over them. Marriages contracted under such influences are not according to the Word of God. He [a young man] who would lead a daughter away from duty, who would confuse her ideas of God’s plain and positive commands to obey and honor her parents, is not one who would be true to the marriage obligations.—The Review and Herald, January 26, 1886. (Fundamentals of Christian Education, 101, 102.)?{1MCP 299.2}[17]
§39
不要玩弄感情——在圣洁的上帝看来，玩弄感情决不是小罪。然而仍有一些人向年轻的女子示爱，等引起她们的爱情之后，便弃之不顾，将他们所说过的话和所有的影响，全都忘得一干二净。一副新面孔吸引了他们，他们便重述那一套话，又向另一个人献同样的殷勤了。--RH,1884年11月4日.(AH57.){1MCP 299.3}[18]
§40
Not to Trifle With Hearts—To trifle with hearts is a crime of no small magnitude in the sight of a holy God. And yet some will show preference for young ladies and call out their affections, and then go their way and forget?all about the words they have spoken and their effect. A new face attracts them, and they repeat the same words, devote to another the same attentions.—The Review and Herald, November 4, 1884. (The Adventist Home, 57.){1MCP 299.3}[18]
§41
谈论心里所想的——许多姑娘谈论的主题是小伙子，小伙子谈论的主题是姑娘。“心里所充满的，口里就说出来”（太12:34）。他们心里主要思想什么，他们谈论的话题就是什么。记录的天使正在记下这些自称是基督徒的小伙和姑娘的话语。他们在上帝的大日再次见到自己的人生记录时，将会多么抱愧蒙羞啊！许多青少年是十足的伪善者。那些未公开接受信仰的青年，被这些假冒为善的人绊倒，任凭别人为他们的得救作多少努力，也无济于事了。--2T460(1870).{1MCP 300.1}[19]
§42
Talk of Subjects Upon Which Minds Run—With many young ladies the boys are the theme of conversation; with the young men, it is the girls. “Out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaketh” (Matthew 12:34). They talk of those subjects upon which their minds mostly run. The recording angel is writing the words of these professed Christian boys and girls. How will they be confused and ashamed when they meet them again in the day of God! Many children are pious hypocrites. The youth who have not made a profession of religion stumble over these hypocritical ones and are hardened against any effort that may be made by those interested in their salvation.—Testimonies for the Church 2:460 (1870).?{1MCP 300.1}[19]
§43
为什么青年人喜欢与青年人相处——当年长的人不在场的时候，青年人就觉得更自由自在，这个缘故就是他们觉得大家都是平辈相同的，各人都以为自己象别人一样好，大家都达不到目标，只是彼此衡量，互相比较，忽略了那唯一完美真实的标准，那真实的模范就是耶稣。祂克己牺牲的生活乃是我们的榜样。--1T154,155(1857).{1MCP 300.2}[20]
§44
Why Youth Prefer Company of Youth—Why the young feel more liberty when the older ones are absent is: they are with those of their kind. Each thinks he is as good as the other. All fail of the mark but measure themselves by themselves, and compare themselves among themselves, and neglect the only perfect and true standard. Jesus is the True Pattern. His self-sacrificing life is our example.—Testimonies for the Church 1:154, 155 (1857).?{1MCP 300.2}[20]
§45
一位年轻的女士受劝保护自己的感情——你在感情上太随便了。如果让你任意而行，你就会犯下终身的错误。不要在廉价市场上出卖你自己。不要随便地对待任何有身份的学生，而要考虑你正在准备为主作工，以便很好地尽到自己的本分，交还祂所赐给你的银子，听到祂说出那宝贵的称赞：“好，你这又良善又忠心的仆人”（太25:23），你必须当心，不要随便与人结交。{1MCP 300.3}[21]
§46
A Young Lady Counseled to Guard the Affections—You are altogether too free with your affections and would, if left to your own course of action, make a lifelong mistake. Do not sell yourself at a cheap market. Do not be free with any gentleman student. Consider that you are preparing to do a work for the Master, that in order to act well your part, and render back the talents to Him who has given them to you, and to hear the precious commendation from His lips, “Well done, good and faithful servant” (Matthew 25:23), you must take heed and not be careless of your associations.?{1MCP 300.3}[21]
§47
为了在侍奉上帝中尽到你的本分，你必须尽可能地在智力方面受充分的训练，才能带着优势出去。你的各项智能需要有力而均衡的培养，在文化上需要优雅的、基督化的多方面发展，才能成为上帝的真工人。你需要磨炼提纯你的品味和想象，并且藉着自制的习惯使你一切的志向都纯洁。你需要凭高尚的动机行事。要集合你所能收集的一切效能，充分利用受教育和培训的机会，好去充任主可能分配给你的任何职位。你很需要在明智的忠告上得到平衡。不要轻视别人的建议。--Lt23,1893.{1MCP 301.1}[22]
§48
In order to act your part in the service of God you must go forth with the advantages of as thorough an intellectual training as possible. You need a vigorous, symmetrical development of the mental capabilities, a graceful, Christian, many-sided development of culture, to be a true worker for God. You need your taste and your imagination chastened and refined and all your aspirations made pure by habitual self-control. You need to move from high, elevated motives. Gather all the efficiency you can, making the most of your opportunities for the education and training of the character to fill any position which the Lord may assign you. You need so much a balance wheel in judicious counsel. Do not despise advice.—Letter 23, 1893.?{1MCP 301.1}[22]
§49
自律——你容易接受各方面都比你强之人的关心。你必须靠着基督的恩典聪明起来。你必须步步考虑你不是自己的人；你是用重价买来的。愿主作你的顾问。不要做任何会削弱你效能的事。要忠诚地对待你自己；努力自律。耶稣基督的恩典必帮助你走每一步，只要你愿意受教，体谅他人。{1MCP 301.2}[23]
§50
Discipline Yourself—You will be inclined to accept the attention of those who are your inferiors in everything. You must be made wiser through the grace of Christ. You must consider every step in the light [of the fact] that you are not your own; you are bought with a price. May the Lord be your Counselor. Do nothing to impair or cripple your efficiency. Deal faithfully with yourself; with painstaking effort discipline yourself. The grace of Jesus Christ will help you at every step if you will be teachable and considerate.?{1MCP 301.2}[23]
§51
现在我写这封信给你，不久还会写信给你，因为既然你以往生活中的错误已被摆在我面前，我就不敢耽延，要极恳切地劝你严格训练你自己。……{1MCP 301.3}[24]
§52
I write you this now, and will write again erelong, for as the mistake of your past life has been set before me, I dare not withhold most earnest entreaties that you hold yourself strictly to discipline....?{1MCP 301.3}[24]
§53
不要被引入歧途，也不要表现出偏爱与年轻男子们作伴，因为这样做不仅会伤害你自己的名誉和将来的前途，而且会引起你所表示偏爱的那些人心中的期望，他们会变得神魂颠倒，象患了相思病似的，毁了他们的求学生涯。你和他们上学是为了获得教育，以便有资格在理智和品格上于今生和不朽的来生更加有为。不要错误地接受或鼓励任何年轻人向你献殷勤。主已指定一项工作要你去做。要以此你的动机去回应上帝的心意和旨意，不要随从自己的爱好，也不要用铁条一样的绳索捆住你将来的命运。--Lt23,1893.{1MCP 301.4}[25]
§54
Be not led astray into any false paths and do not show a preference for the society of young men, for you will not only injure your own reputation and future prospects, but you will raise hopes and expectations in the minds of those to whom you show preference, and they will become as if bewitched with love-sick sentimentalism and spoil their student life. You and they are at the school for the purpose of obtaining an education to qualify you in intellect and character for greater usefulness in this life and for the future immortal life. Make no mistake in?receiving attentions or giving encouragement to any young man. The Lord has designated that He has a work for you to do. Let it be your motive to answer the mind and will of God, and not to follow your own inclination and be bound up in future destiny with cords like bands of steel.—Letter 23, 1893?{1MCP 301.4}[25]
§55
错误的依恋会削弱智力（对一位十八岁女孩的劝勉）——若不征得你父母的完全同意，你就没有权利将自己的感情寄托在任何年轻人身上。你还只是一个孩子，你对任何一个青年男子表示偏爱而不让你父亲完全知情和赞同，就是羞辱他。你依恋这个年轻人使你心不安，睡不好。这使你心中充满了愚昧的幻想和情感主义。这也阻碍了你的学习，正在对你的智力和体力造成严重的损害。若是受到反对，你就变得急躁易怒，情绪低落。--Lt9,1904.{1MCP 302.1}[26]
§56
Wrong Attachments Can Impair Mental Powers (counsel to a girl of eighteen)—You have no right to place your affections on any young man without your father’s and your mother’s full sanction. You are but a child, and for you to show a preference for any young man without the full knowledge and sanction of your father is to dishonor him. Your attachment to this young man is robbing you of a peaceful mind and of healthful sleep. It is filling your mind with foolish fancies and with sentimentalism. It is retarding you in your studies and is working serious evil to your mental and physical powers. If opposed, you become irritable and low spirited.—Letter 9, 1904.?{1MCP 302.1}[26]
§57
学校的制度——这所大学（在加利福尼亚州北部的大学城）的规定严格防止青年男女在上学期间的交往。只有当这些规定暂时解除时，比如有时候的情况，才允许男士们陪伴女士往来参加公共集会。{1MCP 302.2}[27]
§58
School Regulations—The rules of this college [at College City in northern California] strictly guard the association of young men and young women during the school term. It is only when these rules are temporarily suspended, as is sometimes the case, that gentlemen are permitted to accompany ladies to and from public gatherings.?{1MCP 302.2}[27]
§59
我们自己在巴特尔克里克的学院也有类似的规定，但不这么严格。这种规定对于防止青年陷入早恋和不明智婚姻的危险是不可缺少的。年轻人被父母送到学校是为了获得教育，而不是与异性调情。为了社会的福利和学生的最高利益，他们在品格尚未形成，判断力尚未成熟，又得不到父母的照顾和指导之时，不要尝试去选择终身的伴侣。--ST,1882年3月2日.(FE62.){1MCP 302.3}[28]
§60
Our own college at Battle Creek has similar regulations, though not so stringent. Such rules are indispensable to guard the youth from the danger of premature courtship and unwise marriage. Young people are sent to school by their parents to obtain an education, not to flirt with the opposite sex. The good of society, as well as the highest interest of the students, demands that they shall not attempt to select a life partner while their own character is yet undeveloped, their judgment immature, and while they are at the same time deprived of parental care and guidance.—The Signs of the Times, March 2, 1882. (Fundamentals of Christian Education, 62.)?{1MCP 302.3}[28]
§61
年龄、身份和智力的因素——在对待学生的事上，我们必须考虑到年龄和性格。对于年长的和年幼的，不可一视同仁。在一些情况下，可以给予那些老成练达、大家信得过的成年男女一些青年人所没有的特权。年龄、身份和智力，都必须加以考虑。我们必须聪明地考虑我们的全部工作，但我们决不可减少对各年龄层学生的关心和照顾，不可放松禁止青年和未成年的学生那种无益和不妥当的结合。--CT101(1913).{1MCP 303.1}[29]
§62
Factors of Age, Conditions, and Turn of Mind—In all our dealings with students, age and character must be taken into account. We cannot treat the young and the old just alike. There are circumstances under which men and women of sound experience and good standing may be granted some privileges not given to the younger students. The age, the conditions, and the turn of mind must be taken into consideration. We must be wisely considerate in all our work. But we must not lessen our firmness and vigilance in dealing with students of all ages or our strictness in forbidding the unprofitable and unwise association of young and immature students.—Counsels to Parents, Teachers, and Students, 101 (1913).?{1MCP 303.1}[29]
§63
热恋的危险——有些已经入学的人，并没有善用他们的光阴。他们充满年轻人的轻浮，拒绝接受对他们的约束，尤其反感禁止青年男女恋爱的规定。在这个堕落的时代，谈情说爱的弊端已经充分显露。{1MCP 303.2}[30]
§64
Perils of Infatuation—Some of those who attend the college do not properly improve their time. Full of the buoyancy of youth, they spurn the restraint that is brought to bear upon them. Especially do they rebel against the rules that will not allow young gentlemen to pay their attentions to young ladies. Full well is known the evil of such a course in this degenerate age.?{1MCP 303.2}[30]
§65
在一所有那么多青年人就读的大学里，若在这方面效法世界的习俗，就会妨碍他们的心思追求知识和对宗教事物的兴趣。在求学期间，男女青年谈情说爱，表明他们缺乏良好的判断力。就象你那样，盲目的冲动控制了理智和判断。在这种恋情诱惑之下，每一个真基督徒所该体验的重大责任被弃置一旁。他们在属灵上死亡了，忘记了审判和永恒的严肃意义。--5T110(1882).{1MCP 303.3}[31]
§66
In a college where so many youth are associated, imitating the customs of the world in this respect would turn the thoughts in a channel that would hinder them in their pursuit of knowledge and in their interest in religious things. The infatuation on the part of both young men and women in thus placing the affections upon each other during school days shows a lack of good judgment. As in your own case, blind impulse controls reason and judgment. Under this bewitching delusion the momentous responsibility felt by every sincere Christian is laid aside, spirituality dies, and the judgment and eternity lose their awful significance.—Testimonies for the Church 5:110 (1882).?{1MCP 303.3}[31]
§67
把爱人放在首位——许多人爱人胜过爱上帝。他们公然藐视上帝明确的命令，迈出了悖逆的第一步，结果往往是完全背道。人若随从自己的意思，违背主的要求，始终是很危险的。认识到上帝说一不二，对人来说不是容易的功课。一般说来，选择拒绝基督并践踏上帝律法之人为朋友和伴侣的人，终久与他们有一样的思想和精神。--ST,1881年5月19日.(SD165.){1MCP 303.4}[32]
§68
When Human Loves Come First—With many, the love for the human eclipses the love for the divine. They take the first step in backsliding by venturing to disregard?the Lord’s express command; and complete apostasy is too often the result. It has ever proved a dangerous thing for men to carry out their own will in opposition to the requirements of God. Yet it is a hard lesson for men to learn that God means what He says. As a rule, those who choose for their friends and companions, persons who reject Christ and trample upon God’s law eventually become of the same mind and spirit.—The Signs of the Times, May 19, 1881. (Sons and Daughters of God, 165.)?{1MCP 303.4}[32]
§69
混杂的婚姻——我的弟兄阿，如果你受引诱与一位年轻幼稚，缺乏人生日常责任实际经验的女子结为终生伴侣，那就铸成大错了。更有甚者，她还不明白自己对于上帝的责任。她并非缺乏亮光，因她本享有宗教的特权，但她却没有感觉到自己离开基督的可怜罪况。你在恋爱的时候，如果一再缺席上帝与祂百姓相聚的祷告会，而与那不爱上帝，对宗教生活不感兴趣的人约会，你又怎能指望上帝成全这种结合呢？--3T44(1872).{1MCP 304.1}[33]
§70
Mixed Marriages—If you, my brother, are allured to unite your life interest with a young, inexperienced girl, who is really deficient in education in the common, practical, daily duties of life, you make a mistake; but this deficiency is small compared with her ignorance in regard to her duty to God. She has not been destitute of light; she has had religious privileges, and yet she has not felt her wretched sinfulness without Christ. If, in your infatuation, you can repeatedly turn from the prayer meeting—where God meets with His people—in order to enjoy the society of one who has no love for God and who sees no attractions in the religious life, how can you expect God to prosper such a union?—Testimonies for the Church 3:44 (1872).?{1MCP 304.1}[33]
§71
信徒与非信徒结婚——现今基督教界对于圣经上有关信徒与非信徒结婚的教训，表现着出奇而惊人的冷淡。许多自称敬爱上帝的人，宁可顺从自己的心意，而不愿接受无穷智慧之主的训诲。在这种有关双方今生及来生之快乐与幸福的大事上，理性，判断，及敬畏上帝之心都被抛诸脑后，而盲目的冲动与刚愎的坚决却当权了。{1MCP 304.2}[34]
§72
Marriage of Christians With Unbelievers—There is in the Christian world an astonishing, alarming indifference to the teaching of God’s Word in regard to the marriage of Christians with unbelievers. Many who profess to love and fear God choose to follow the bent of their own minds rather than take counsel of Infinite Wisdom. In a matter which vitally concerns the happiness and well-being of both parties for this world and the next, reason, judgment, and the fear of God are set aside, and blind impulse, stubborn determination, is allowed to control.?{1MCP 304.2}[34]
§73
在别的方面很明智有良心的男女，在这事上却掩耳不听劝告；对于朋友，亲戚，及上帝仆人们的忠言恳劝，却充耳不闻。忠告与警戒的话，被当作不客气的干涉，那忠实敢进谏言的朋友，竟被当作仇敌看待。这一切都恰如撒但的心愿。他向人施展邪术，叫人受惑入迷。理性任自制的僵绳从肉欲的颈项上脱落，不圣洁的情欲执鞭指挥，直至受害者觉悟到生活的愁惨及束缚时，却是悔之晚矣。这不是出于幻想的描绘，而是事实的重述。凡违犯上帝明令禁止的结合，必不得到祂的许可。--5T365,366(1885).{1MCP 304.3}[35]
§74
Men and women who are otherwise sensible and conscientious close their ears to counsel; they are deaf to the appeals and entreaties of friends and kindred and of?the servants of God. The expression of a caution or warning is regarded as impertinent meddling, and the friend who is faithful enough to utter a remonstrance is treated as an enemy. All this is as Satan would have it. He weaves his spell about the soul, and it becomes bewitched, infatuated. Reason lets fall the reins of self-control upon the neck of lust; unsanctified passion bears sway, until, too late, the victim awakens to a life of misery and bondage. This is not a picture drawn by the imagination but a recital of facts. God’s sanction is not given to unions which He has expressly forbidden.—Testimonies for the Church 5:365, 366 (1885).?{1MCP 304.3}[35]
§75
不信者的定义——纵使你所选择的伴侣在其他各方面样样相当（其实不然），但他现在还没有接受现代真理；他既是一个不信的人，那你就被上天禁止而不得与他结合。你决不能忽视这道神圣的教导，否则你的灵性难免招致危险。--5T364(1885).{1MCP 305.1}[36]
§76
Definition of an Unbeliever—Though the companion of your choice were in all other respects worthy (which he is not), yet he has not accepted the truth for this time; he is an unbeliever, and you are forbidden of Heaven to unite yourself with him. You cannot, without peril to your soul, disregard this divine injunction.—Testimonies for the Church 5:364 (1885).?{1MCP 305.1}[36]
§77
不圣洁想象的禁地（对一个传道人的劝勉）——我看到你正处在大危险之中。撒但正站在你的道路上，时常向你低声说动听的无稽之谈，向你显示某人迷人的图片，说她比你结发之妻，你孩子的母亲更适合作你的伴侣。{1MCP 305.2}[37]
§78
The Forbidden Ground of Unholy Fancies (counsel to a minister)—You have been represented to me as being in great peril. Satan is on your track, and at times he has whispered to you pleasing fables and has shown you charming pictures of one whom he represents as a more suitable companion for you than the wife of your youth, the mother of your children.?{1MCP 305.2}[37]
§79
撒但正在不息不倦地悄然工作，藉着特殊的试探拉你下水。他决心成为你的导师，你必须置身于能够获得力量的地方抵挡他。他希望把你引进招魂术的迷宫，让你的爱情从你妻子转到另一个女子身上。他希望让你想念这个女子，直至不圣洁的感情使这个女子成为你的神。{1MCP 305.3}[38]
§80
Satan is working stealthily, untiringly, to effect your downfall through his specious temptations. He is determined to become your teacher, and you need now to place yourself where you can get strength to resist him. He hopes to lead you into the mazes of spiritualism. He hopes to wean your affections from your wife and to fix them upon another woman. He desires that you will allow your mind to dwell upon this woman until through unholy affection she becomes your god.?{1MCP 305.3}[38]
§81
人类的仇敌引诱耶和华所拣选的守望人思想在来生能与一位他所爱的女子相聚，建立家庭。仇敌已取得了很大的成功，我们不需要这些悦人的图景。这些景象都是那试探者所发明的。……{1MCP 305.4}[39]
§82
The enemy of souls has gained much when he can lead?the imagination of one of Jehovah’s chosen watchmen to dwell upon the possibilities of association, in the world to come, with some woman whom he loves, and of there raising up a family. We need no such pleasing pictures. All such views originate in the mind of the tempter....?{1MCP 305.4}[39]
§83
我蒙指示，属灵上的无稽之谈已虏获了许多人。他们耽于声色，若不悔改，必定灭亡。我对一切放纵不圣洁想象的人说：止步，为基督的缘故，就地止步。你已踏入禁地。我恳劝你们悔过自新。--Lt231,1903.(MM100,101.){1MCP 306.1}[40]
§84
It is presented to me that spiritual fables are taking many captive. Their minds are sensual, and unless a change comes, this will prove their ruin. To all who are indulging these unholy fancies, I would say, Stop; for Christ’s sake, stop right where you are. You are on forbidden ground. Repent, I entreat of you, and be converted.—Letter 231, 1903.?{1MCP 306.1}[40]
§85
自由恋爱——从离道叛教上，招魂术上，以及自由恋爱主义上，我已经看出这些关于上帝之（招魂术和泛神沦）离奇观念所生的后果了。在这些学理中的自由恋爱潮流乃是这样的隐秘，以致最初很难显出它的真情实相来。直到主向我提示的时候，我还不晓得这是叫做什么，但后来我蒙指示称之为不圣洁的精神恋爱。--8T292(1904).{1MCP 306.2}[41]
§86
Free Love—I have seen the results of these fanciful [spiritualistic and pantheistic] views of God, in apostasy, spiritualism, and free-lovism. The free-love tendency of these teachings was so concealed that at first it was difficult to make plain its real character. Until the Lord presented it to me, I knew not what to call it, but I was instructed to call it unholy spiritual love.—Testimonies for the Church 8:292 (1904).?{1MCP 306.2}[41]
§87
爱不是感情主义——耶稣希望我们向别人所表现的爱和同情，不带感情主义的色彩，因为那是人类的网罗。祂所指的是祂所言传身教的天国之爱。可惜我们往往没有表现这样的爱，反而离心离德，……结果是与上帝疏远，信仰的残缺，基督徒成长的停滞。--YI,1892年10月20日.(SD147.){1MCP 306.3}[42]
§88
Love Is Not Sentimentalism—The love and sympathy which Jesus would have us give to others does not savor of sentimentalism, which is a snare to the soul; it is a love that is of heavenly extraction, which Jesus exemplifies by both precept and example. But instead of manifesting this love, how often we are alienated and estranged one from another.... The result is estrangement from God, a dwarfed experience, a blighting of Christian growth.—The Youth’s Instructor, October 20, 1892. (Sons and Daughters of God, 147.)?{1MCP 306.3}[42]
§89
辩识虚情假意——使徒警告我们说：“爱人不可虚假，恶要厌恶，善要亲近。爱弟兄，要彼此亲热；恭敬人，要彼此推让”（罗12:9-10）。保罗要我们分辨清楚，受基督的灵激励的纯洁无私的爱，和世界上充斥的无意义的欺人的虚情假意，两者之间的不同。{1MCP 306.4}[43]
§90
Counterfeit Identified—We are admonished by the apostle: “Let love be without dissimulation. Abhor that which is evil; cleave to that which is good. Be kindly affectioned one to another with brotherly love; in honor preferring one another” (Romans 12:9, 10). Paul would have us distinguish between the pure, unselfish love which is prompted by the spirit of Christ, and the?unmeaning, deceitful pretense with which the world abounds.?{1MCP 306.4}[43]
§91
这种卑鄙的伪装已使许多生灵误入歧途。它也会不分是非，姑息犯罪者的行为而不如实地向他指出错误。真正的友谊，绝对不会形成这样的做法。只有世俗的心才存有这种精神。当基督徒不断地表现得和蔼、同情和宽恕的时候，他就会感到与罪恶格格不入。他会憎厌罪恶，追求良善，宁愿丧失不信上帝之人的联系与友谊。基督的灵，要引导我们憎恨罪恶，而同时却要我们心甘情愿地为拯救罪人而作任何牺牲。--5T171(1882).{1MCP 307.1}[44]
§92
This base counterfeit has misled many souls. It would blot out the distinction between right and wrong, by agreeing with the transgressor instead of faithfully showing him his errors. Such a course never springs from real friendship. The spirit by which it is prompted dwells only in the carnal heart. While the Christian will be ever kind, compassionate, and forgiving, he can feel no harmony with sin. He will abhor evil and cling to that which is good, at the sacrifice of association or friendship with the ungodly. The spirit of Christ will lead us to hate sin, while we are willing to make any sacrifice to save the sinner.—Testimonies for the Church 5:171 (1882).?{1MCP 307.1}[44]
§93
选择伴侣——青年女子要在这样的指导下，只接受那纯洁，刚强，勤劳，有志气，诚实，爱上帝并敬畏上帝的人作为她终生的伴侣。青年男子要追求能与他分担人生的担子，提高和陶炼他的情操，并用她的爱使他快乐的女子作为他永久的配偶。--MH359(1905).{1MCP 307.2}[45]
§94
Selecting a Companion—Let a young woman accept as a life companion only one who possesses pure, manly traits of character, one who is diligent, aspiring, and honest, one who loves and fears God. Let a young man seek one to stand by his side who is fitted to bear her share of life’s burdens, one whose influence will ennoble and refine him and who will make him happy in her love.—The Ministry of Healing, 359 (1905).?{1MCP 307.2}[45]