第57章 对于不信的配偶应取的态度
§1
第57章 对于不信的配偶应取的态度
§2
Chap. 57 - Attitude Toward an Unbelieving Companion
§3
妻子本身是基督徒应否离开不信主的丈夫？——我曾收到一些母亲们的来信，诉说她们在家中所遭遇的试炼，并征询我的意见。只在这些实例中举出一个来，就可以说明其余的了。这位作丈夫和父亲的并不是信主的人，因而在训练她子女的事上，作母亲的遭遇了许多的困难。丈夫是一个不尊敬神圣事物的人，对她常出粗鄙无礼的恶言，并且教子女藐视她的威权。当她试图和他们祈祷之时，他便闯进来大肆咆哮，开口就咒骂上帝，并以一大堆下流的形容词来污辱《圣经》。她非常沮丧，甚至生命对于她已成了重累。她有什么能作的呢？她继续留在家里，对于她的儿女有什么益处呢？她过去曾热切地盼望在主的葡萄园里做些工作；由于作丈夫和父亲的常常教儿女蔑视并违背她，所以她也曾认为离开家庭比滞留在那里要好得多了。[1]
§4
[NOTE: THIS CHAPTER IS LARGELY COMMUNICATIONS TO DISTRESSED BELIEVERS SEEKING COUNSEL.--COMPILERS.] Should a Christian Wife Leave an Unbelieving Husband?--Letters have come to me from mothers, relating their trials at home and asking my counsel. One of these cases will serve to represent many. The husband and father is not a believer, and everything is made hard for the mother in the training of her children. The husband is a profane man, vulgar and abusive in his language to her, and he teaches the children to disregard her authority. When she is trying to pray with them, he will come in and make all the noise he can and break out into cursing God and heaping vile epithets upon the Bible. She is so discouraged that life is a burden to her. What good can she do? What benefit is it to her children for her to remain at home? She has felt an earnest desire to do some work in the Lords vineyard and has thought that it might be best to leave her family rather than to remain while the husband and father is constantly teaching the children to disrespect and disobey her. {AH 348.1}[1]
§5
在这种情形下，我的劝告乃是：作母亲的啊，无论你们必须忍受任何由于贫穷，心灵的伤痛，或为夫为父之人的横蛮傲慢所造成的试炼，你们也万万不可撇弃自己的儿女；不要丢下他们，使之沾染不敬神的父亲的影响。你们的使命乃是要抵消这种显然为撒但所控制之父亲的工作。[2]
§6
In such cases my advice would be, Mothers, whatever trials you may be called to endure through poverty, through wounds and bruises of the soul, from the harsh, overbearing assumption of the husband and father, do not leave your children; do not give them up to the influence of a godless father. Your work is to counteract the work of the father, who is apparently under the control of Satan. {AH 348.2}[2]
§7
要作自制的活榜样——你有困难，这是我知道的，但可能有这样的情形，就是表现一种排斥而非吸引的精神。你的丈夫需要每天见到一个活生生的忍耐和自制的榜样。你当尽力博取他的欢心，然而，还是不可放弃任何真理的原则。[3]
§8
Give a Living Example of Self-control.--You have trials, I know, but there is such a thing as showing a spirit of driving rather than of drawing. Your husband needs each day to see a living example of patience and self-control. Make every effort to please him, and yet do not yield up one principle of the truth. . . . {AH 349.1}[3]
§9
基督要求整个的人——全心、全性、全意、全力——为他服务。当你向他献上他所要求的一切，你便在品格方面代表他了。要让你丈夫在你身上看出圣灵的运行。你要谨慎而体贴，忍耐而宽容。不可强迫他聆听真理。当克尽你作妻子的本分，然后再观察他的心有否受感。不可断绝你对丈夫的爱情。当尽一切可能的方法使他喜悦。不要让你的宗教信仰使你们双方疏远了。要本乎良心地顺从上帝，并随时随事都要尽可能博取你丈夫的欢心。[4]
§10
Christ requires the whole being in His service--heart, soul, mind, and strength. As you give Him what He asks of you, you will represent Him in character. Let your husband see the Holy Spirit working in you. Be careful and considerate, patient and forbearing. Do not urge the truth upon him. Do your duty as a wife should, and then see if his heart is not touched. Your affections must not be weaned from your husband. Please him in every way possible. Let not your religious faith draw you apart. Conscientiously obey God, and please your husband wherever you can. . . . {AH 349.2}[4]
§11
要让人人看出你爱耶稣而且信靠他。使你的丈夫和一切信主与不信主的朋友们明了你切望他们得见真理的优美。可是不要表现出痛苦而忧郁的挂虑来，这往往会破坏了善工。[5]
§12
Let all see that you love Jesus and trust in Him. Give your husband and your believing and unbelieving friends evidence that you desire them to see the beauty of truth. But do not show that painful, worrying anxiety which often spoils a good work. . . . {AH 349.3}[5]
§13
勿容一句非难或怨尤的话语落入你丈夫的耳中。有时你的处境很难，但是不要谈论这些试炼。静默就是雄辩。急躁之言只能加增你的不幸。要欢喜快乐。当尽可能地将阳光导入家中，把阴翳逐出户外。要让公义日头的明光照射到你灵宫的内室去。如此，基督徒生活中的馨香之气就会带入你的家中。那些令人厌烦而往往有欠真实的话题也就绝口不提了。[6]
§14
Never let a word of reproach or faultfinding fall upon the ears of your husband. You sometimes pass through strait places, but do not talk of these trials. Silence is eloquence. Hasty speech will only increase your unhappiness. Be cheerful and happy. Bring all the sunshine possible into your home, and shut out the shadows. Let the bright beams of the Sun of Righteousness shine into the chambers of your soul temple. Then the fragrance of the Christian life will be brought into your family. There will be no dwelling upon disagreeable things, which many times have no truth in them. {AH 349.4}[6]
§15
劝一位背负重担的妻子仍要常常喜乐——由于你的丈夫反脸转离了耶稣，你现在已负有双重的责任。[7]
§16
A Burdened Wife Counseled to Keep Cheerful.-- You now have a double responsibility because your husband has turned his face away from Jesus. . . . {AH 350.1}[7]
§17
我知道你独自遵行真道心中必定非常忧伤。但是，你这作妻子的啊，你怎知一贯地存着信心顺从真理的人生，不能赢得你丈夫转回头来遵守真理呢？要带领那班可爱的孩子来就耶稣。以简明的话语向他们阐述真理。要给他们唱那表明基督之爱的快乐动人的诗歌。要带领你的儿女来就耶稣，因为他疼爱小孩子。[8]
§18
I know it must be a great grief for you to stand alone, as far as the doing of the word is concerned. But how knowest thou, O wife, but that your consistent life of faith and obedience may win back your husband to the truth? Let the dear children be brought to Jesus. In simple language speak the words of truth to them. Sing to them pleasant, attractive songs which reveal the love of Christ. Bring your children to Jesus, for He loves little children. {AH 350.2}[8]
§19
要常常喜乐。不可忘记你有一位保惠师，就是基督所差来的圣灵。你永不会孤单。你若听受那现在向你说话的声音，你若毫不迟疑地应答那敲你心门的声音，说：“主耶稣啊，请进来，让我与你你与我一同坐席。”那位自天而来的贵宾就必进来。当这全能神圣的质素与你同在时，就有平安与安息。[9]
§20
Keep cheerful. Do not forget that you have a Comforter, the Holy Spirit, which Christ has appointed. You are never alone. If you will listen to the voice that now speaks to you, if you will respond without delay to the knocking at the door of your heart, Come in, Lord Jesus, that I may sup with Thee, and Thee with me, the heavenly Guest will enter. When this element, which is all divine, abides with you, there is peace and rest. {AH 350.3}[9]
§21
维持基督徒的原则——不敬拜上帝的家庭，正像一艘飘泊在海中，没有领港也没有舵的船一样。狂风巨浪摧击着它，随时有全舟覆灭的危险。为了基督的缘故，你当珍视自己和儿女的生命，因为将来你必在上帝的宝座前与他们和你的丈夫相遇。万不可使你所持守的基督徒原则弱化了，乃要愈久愈强。不论你丈夫如何厌烦，不论他的反对多么激烈，你仍须表现出一贯忠信的基督徒那种坚毅不拔的态度。这样，不论他说什么，只要他有一颗肉心，则方寸之间仍不得不钦佩你的为人。[10]
§22
Maintain Christian Principles.--The household where God is not worshiped is like a ship in the midst of the sea without a pilot or a helm. The tempest beats and breaks upon it, and there is danger that all on board may perish. Regard your life and the lives of your children as precious for Christs sake, for you must meet them and your husband before the throne of God. Your steadfast Christian principles must not become weak, but stronger and stronger. However much your husband may be annoyed, however strongly he may oppose you, you must show a consistent, faithful, Christian steadfastness. And then whatever he may say, in heart and judgment he can but respect you, if he has a heart of flesh. {AH 350.4}[10]
§23
当以上帝的要求为首务——此后，得见他的儿媳。她是蒙上帝眷爱的人，然而她被迫过着奴役似的生活，恐惧、战栗、沮丧、疑虑，而且神经非常紧张。这位姊妹不必认为务须把自己的意志降服于一个比自己年轻而不敬神的青年。她应该记住：婚姻并不是要泯灭她自己的个性。上帝在她身上所有的要求，比任何属世的要求更重要。基督已以自己的宝血赎取了她。她不再是自己的人了。她没有全然信靠上帝，却违背了自己的信仰和良心去顺服一个傲慢暴虐的人，这人受撒但的激动，随时听从这魔王的指使，而去有效地威吓这战栗恐惧的生灵。她多次受到骚扰，甚至神经系统都因而紊乱，简直变成一个废人了。难道这位姊妹落到这个地步，甚至她应献与上帝的服务都被剥夺了，乃是主的旨意么？不。她的婚姻乃是魔鬼的骗术。然而现在既到了这个地步，她就当勉为其难以温良对待她的丈夫，而且在不违背良心的原则之下，要尽量设法使他快乐；因为他若继续背叛，则他所能获得的天堂也就是这个世界而已。但她若为取悦那存着龙的精神的傲慢丈夫，而自行放弃参赴聚会的权利，这并不合乎上帝的旨意。[11]
§24
Gods Claims to Come First. [NOTE: TAKEN FROM CHAPTER WARNINGS AND REPROOFS, IN WHICH ARE FOUND TESTIMONIES TO A NUMBER OF MEMBERS IN A CERTAIN CHURCH. THIS FOLLOWS A MESSAGE ADDRESSED TO A BROTHER T.--COMPILERS.]--I was then shown his daughter-in-law. She is beloved of God, but held in servile bondage, fearing, trembling, desponding, doubting, and very nervous. This sister should not feel that she must yield her will to a godless youth who has less years upon his head than herself. She should remember that her marriage does not destroy her individuality. God has claims upon her higher than any earthly claim. Christ has bought her with His own blood. She is not her own. She fails to put her entire trust in God and submits to yield her convictions, her conscience, to an overbearing, tyrannical man, fired up by Satan whenever his satanic majesty can work effectually through him to intimidate this trembling, shrinking soul. She has so many times been thrown into agitation that her nervous system is shattered, and she is merely a wreck. Is it the will of the Lord that this sister should be in this state and God be robbed of her service? No. Her marriage was a deception of the devil. Yet now she should make the best of it, treat her husband with tenderness, and make him as happy as she can without violating her conscience; for if he remains in his rebellion, this world is all the heaven he will have. But to deprive herself of the privilege of meetings, to gratify an overbearing husband possessing the spirit of the dragon, is not according to Gods will. {AH 351.1}[11]
§25
“又有一个说：我才娶了妻，所以不能去。”这个人的罪并不在于结婚，乃是因为他与一个使他的心志远离人生最高尚最重要之关系的人结了婚。无论如何，一个人不应让妻子或家庭牵引他的思想远离基督，或导使他拒受福音恩惠的邀请。[12]
§26
And another said, I have married a wife, and therefore I cannot come. The sin of this man was not in marrying, but in marrying one who divorced his mind from the higher and more important interests of life. Never should a man allow wife and home to draw his thoughts away from Christ or to lead him to refuse to accept the gracious invitations of the gospel. {AH 351.2}[12]
§27
部分得救胜于完全丧失——郭弟兄，你曾经历过许多令人沮丧的事；但你仍须诚恳，恒切，而坚毅地去尽你对家庭的责任，倘属可行，要将他们一齐带去。你不可吝惜任何努力，而不去劝服他们与你同奔天程。但如果母亲和儿女不愿与你同行，反引诱你撇弃你的义务和宗教权利，你仍须勇往直前，即使单独而行也当如此。你该存着敬畏上帝的心而生活。你也该利用一切时机参赴聚会，尽力获取属灵的能力，因为在将要来到的日子里，这样的能力乃是不可或缺的。罗得的产业已全部化为灰烬了。你若遇见损失，万勿气馁，而你若只能救你家中一部分的人，也胜于完全丧失。[13]
§28
Better Save Part Than Lose All.--Brother K, you have had many discouragements; but you must be earnest, firm, and decided to do your duty in your family, and take them with you if possible. You should spare no effort to prevail upon them to accompany you on your heavenward journey. But if the mother and the children do not choose to accompany you, but rather seek to draw you away from your duties and religious privileges, you must go forward even if you go alone. You must live in the fear of God. You must improve your opportunities of attending the meetings and gaining all the spiritual strength you can, for you will need it in the days to come. Lots property was all consumed. If you should meet with loss, you should not be discouraged; and if you can save only a part of your family, it is much better than to lose all. {AH 352.1}[13]