第52章 治家之道
§1
第52章 治家之道
§2
Chap. 52 - Home Government
§3
父母的指导原则——世上有许多人喜爱某些就其本身而论可能是良好的事物，可惜他们对于这些事物已经感到心满意足，就不再追求基督所切望赐与他们的更伟大，更高贵的幸福了。既然如此，我们不可粗鲁地夺去他们所珍爱的。当向他们阐明真理的优美与宝贵。要引导他们瞻仰基督与他的荣美；如此，他们就必避开那吸引他们的爱远离他的每样事物。这是父母在训练儿女的事上所应持守的原则。靠赖基督的恩典，借着你们对待小孩子的态度，就能陶冶他们的品格。使之配承受永生。[1]
§4
The Guiding Principle for Parents.--Many in the world have their affections on things that may be good in themselves, but their minds are satisfied with these things and do not seek the greater and higher good that Christ desires to give them. Now we must not rudely seek to deprive them of what they hold dear. Reveal to them the beauty and preciousness of truth. Lead them to behold Christ and His loveliness; then they will turn aside from everything that will draw their affections away from Him. This is the principle upon which parents should work in the training of their children. By your manner of dealing with the little ones you can by the grace of Christ mold their characters for everlasting life. {AH 305.1}[1]
§5
身为父母的人应当以如何能善尽人力并仰赖神助，造就自己的儿女，使其品格近于最完美的地步这件事，作为他们毕生研究的题旨。这项工作，连同它的重要性与责任，当他们生儿养女之时无形中便承担下来了。[2]
§6
Fathers and mothers should make it their life study that their children may become as nearly perfect in character as human effort, combined with divine aid, can make them. This work, with all its importance and responsibility, they have accepted, in that they have brought children into the world. {AH 305.2}[2]
§7
治家所必需的规律——每一个基督化的家庭都应该有家规；父母必须在彼此之间的言语行为上给儿女树立一个可贵而活生生的榜样，使他们知道父母对于他们抱有怎样的期望。当教导儿童和青年要善自尊重，忠于上帝，忠于原则；也当教导他们敬重并遵守上帝的诫命。如此，这些原则就必管束他们的人生，并在他们与人交往时实行出来。[3]
§8
Rules Necessary for Government in the Home.-- Every Christian home should have rules; and parents should, in their words and in their deportment toward each other, give to the children a precious living example of what they desire them to be. . . . Teach the children and youth to respect themselves, to be true to God, true to principle; teach them to respect and obey the law of God. Then these principles will control their lives and will be carried out in their association with others. {AH 305.3}[3]
§9
遵循《圣经》的原则——务须随时留意，俾不致忽略了治家的基本原则。主的旨意乃要使地上的家庭作为天家的表征。而地上的家庭若管理得当，那由圣灵所赐的同一成圣的感化力也就必被导入教会之中了。[4]
§10
Bible Principles to Be Followed.--There is need for constant watching that the principles which lie at the foundation of family government are not disregarded. The Lord designs that the families on earth shall be symbols of the family in heaven. And when earthly families are conducted in right lines, the same sanctification of the Spirit will be brought into the church. {AH 306.1}[4]
§11
父母们自己也当悔改，并且明白顺服神旨的真义是什么，当像赤子般将自己的心意夺回，使之顺服耶稣基督的旨意，而后他们才能正确地表现出：按照上帝的旨意家庭中应有的管理法。[5]
§12
Parents should themselves be converted and know what it is to be in submission to Gods will, as little children, bringing into captivity their thoughts to the will of Jesus Christ, before they can rightly represent the government that God designed should exist in the family. {AH 306.2}[5]
§13
上帝亲自建立了家族关系。在管理儿女的事上，他的圣言乃是唯一安全的指南。人间的哲理所发现的绝不比上帝所知道的还多，它也并未创拟出一种比我们的主所赐与的，更明智的教养儿女的计划。还有谁比儿女的创造主更清楚地了解他们的需要呢？还有谁比那用自己的血买来他们的主更关怀他们的福利呢？若是上帝的圣言受到精审的研究，认真的遵守，那么因邪荡儿女之悖逆行为所生刺心的悲痛就必大为减少了。[6]
§14
God Himself established the family relations. His word is the only safe guide in the management of children. Human philosophy has not discovered more than God knows or devised a wiser plan of dealing with children than that given by our Lord. Who can better understand all the needs of children than their Creator? Who can feel a deeper interest in their welfare than He who bought them with His own blood? If the word of God were carefully studied and faithfully obeyed, there would be less soul anguish over the perverse conduct of wicked children. {AH 306.3}[6]
§15
尊重儿女的权益——要记得：儿女们也有必须予以尊重的权益。[7]
§16
Respect the Childrens Rights.--Remember that children have rights which must be respected. {AH 306.4}[7]
§17
作儿女的具有其父母应当予以承认并尊重的权利。他们有权享受一种教育与训练，能将他们造就成为今世社会上有用的，被尊重而且受爱戴的分子，并赋予他们一种道德上的资格，俾配参与那纯洁而圣善的来生社会。青年都应受教，明白他们现在和将来的福祉大半系于儿童和青年时期所养成的习惯。他们自幼就应该惯于服从，克己，并顾及别人的福利。他们当受教如何遏制暴躁易怒的性情，不出愤激的言语，表现一贯的亲切、礼貌和自制之力。[8]
§18
Children have claims which their parents should acknowledge and respect. They have a right to such an education and training as will make them useful, respected, and beloved members of society here, and give them a moral fitness for the society of the pure and holy hereafter. The young should be taught that both their present and their future well-being depend to a great degree on the habits they form in childhood and youth. They should be early accustomed to submission, self-denial, and a regard for others happiness. They should be taught to subdue the hasty temper, to withhold the passionate word, to manifest unvarying kindness, courtesy, and self-control. {AH 306.5}[8]
§19
劝告一位迷于溺爱的母亲——在你看来，溺爱，就是毫无价值之爱的表现，乃是极其重要的。搂在怀中，抱在手里，原是很容易的事；但你却不可助长此种表现，除非他们已借着完全的顺从而证实其真正的价值。你的纵容，你对上帝之要求的轻忽，乃是最残酷的行为。由于你说：“我的儿子爱我，”你便助长并原谅了悖逆的罪恶。这样的爱是毫无价值而有欺骗性的。它根本不是爱。爱，真实的爱，在家中所当培养的爱，乃是极有价值的，因为它有顺从为凭证。[9]
§20
To a Parent Deluded by Blind Affection.--Blind affection, a cheap manifestation of love, goes a long ways with you. To encircle the arms about the neck is easy; but manifestations should not be encouraged by you unless they are proved to be of real value by perfect obedience. Your indulgence, your disregard of Gods requirements is the veriest cruelty. You encourage and excuse disobedience by saying, My boy loves me. Such love is cheap and deceptive. It is no love at all. The love, the genuine love, to be cultivated in the family is of value because it is verified by obedience. . . . {AH 307.1}[9]
§21
你若爱惜儿女的灵命，就当引导他们遵守规矩法度。但是许多的亲吻与爱的表现却使你盲目了，这一点你的儿女是知道的。应该少注重这些外表的拥抱与亲吻等表现，要追求其实质，并显明何为出于孝思的爱。除非这些表现都基于顺从与尊重你的吩咐，否则均可视为欺诈、造作，而予以拒斥。[10]
§22
If you love the souls of your children, bring them into order. But abundant kisses and tokens of love blind your eyes, and your children know it. Make less of these outward demonstrations of embracing and kissing and go down to the bottom of things and show what constitutes filial love. Refuse these manifestations as a fraud, a deception, unless backed up by obedience and respect for your commands. {AH 307.2}[10]
§23
盲目疼爱或过分严厉均非所宜——我们固然不可放纵盲目的疼爱，但也当防止过分严厉的表现。万不可以暴力强迫孩子来就主。他们可以被引领，却不能受驱策。基督曾宣称：“我的羊听我的声音，我也认识他们，他们也跟着我。”他并未说，我的羊听我的声音，不敢不走在顺命的路上。在管理儿童的事上，爱的表现是不可或缺的。作父母的永不该以苛刻无理的要求来伤孩子的心，苛刻将驱使心灵陷入撒但的网罗里。[11]
§24
Manifest Neither Blind Affection nor Undue Severity.--While we are not to indulge blind affection, neither are we to manifest undue severity. Children cannot be brought to the Lord by force. They can be led, but not driven. My sheep hear My voice, and I know them, and they follow Me, Christ declares. He did not say, My sheep hear My voice and are forced into the path of obedience. In the government of children love must be shown. Never should parents cause their children pain by harshness or unreasonable exactions. Harshness drives souls into Satans net. {AH 307.3}[11]
§25
将威权与爱的感化力配合起来，便是亲切而坚固地握持治家之权的秘诀。一心专注于上帝的荣耀以及我们儿女所欠他的债，必保守我们不至纵容或赞许邪恶。[12]
§26
The combined influence of authority and love will make it possible to hold firmly and kindly the reins of family government. An eye single to the glory of God and to what our children owe Him will keep us from looseness and from sanctioning evil. {AH 308.1}[12]
§27
要使儿女听命，苛厉并不是必需的——但愿无人以为……要使儿女听命顺服，苛刻与严厉是必须的。我曾见到有人很有效地维持家规，而从无疾言厉色的表现。我也曾在另一些家庭中，听到有人常以权威的声调发号施令，苛求呵斥，而且往往继之以严厉的惩罚。在前一种实例中，儿女都效从父母所采取的方式，彼此之间极少讲说苛酷的言语。而在后一种实例中，儿女也一样效从父母的作风；一天到晚所听到的尽是些苛刻的话语、挑剔与争辩。[13]
§28
Harshness Not Requisite to Obedience.--Let none imagine . . . that harshness and severity are necessary to secure obedience. I have seen the most efficient family government maintained without a harsh word or look. I have been in other families where commands were constantly given in an authoritative tone, and harsh rebukes and severe punishments were often administered. In the first case the children followed the course pursued by the parents and seldom spoke to one another in harsh tones. In the second also the parental example was imitated by the children; and cross words, faultfindings, and disputes were heard from morning till night. {AH 308.2}[13]
§29
凡足以在心灵中造成恐惧并驱逐仁爱的威吓之言，都当予以遏制。一位贤明、慈祥、敬畏上帝的父亲断不会将奴性的恐惧带入家中，却要以爱的原素灌注其间。我们若就饮于生命之水，那从源头所涌流出来的，必是甘甜而非苦涩的水。[14]
§30
Words that intimidate, creating fear and expelling love from the soul, are to be restrained. A wise, tender, God-fearing father will bring, not a slavish fear, but an element of love into the home. If we drink of the water of life, the fountain will send forth sweet water, not bitter. {AH 308.3}[14]
§31
苛厉的言语能使儿女的性情乖戾，心灵受伤，而且在某些情形之下，这种创作是颇难复的。儿童们对于不公平的事很敏感，有的儿童遭受不公平的待遇便会沮丧不振，并且将来对大声怒斥、命令，甚或刑罚的恫吓，都会一点也不在乎了。[15]
§32
Harsh words sour the temper and wound the hearts of children, and in some cases these wounds are difficult to heal. Children are sensitive to the least injustice, and some become discouraged under it and will neither heed the loud, angry voice of command nor care for threatenings of punishment. {AH 308.4}[15]
§33
过分在小事上挑剔错处乃是一种危险。过于严厉的批评，过于强硬的规则，反而会招致不顾一切律例的后果；而处在此等教育之下的儿童，将来对于基督的律法也必表示同样的蔑视。[16]
§34
There is danger of too severely criticizing small things. Criticism that is too severe, rules that are too rigid, lead to the disregard of all regulations; and by and by children thus educated will show the same disrespect for the laws of Christ. {AH 308.5}[16]
§35
坚定而不轻易发怒的管束是必需的——儿童的本性是敏感而可爱的。他们很容易快乐，也很容易不快乐。借着温慈的训导，和爱的言行，作母亲的便可以将她们的儿女系在自己的心上。对于儿女疾言厉色，苛求呵斥，实在是绝大的错误。但一贯不变的坚定与不轻易发怒的管束，乃是齐家所必需的要则。应该安静而从容地发表你的意见，一举一动都要存体贴的心，而且毫不偏倚地实践你的决定。[17]
§36
Uniform Firmness, Unimpassioned Control Necessary. --Children have sensitive, loving natures. They are easily pleased and easily made unhappy. By gentle discipline in loving words and acts mothers may bind their children to their hearts. To manifest severity and to be exacting with children are great mistakes. Uniform firmness and unimpassioned control are necessary to the discipline of every family. Say what you mean calmly, move with consideration, and carry out what you say without deviation. {AH 309.1}[17]
§37
当你与儿女相处之时，表现温厚的亲情是值得的。对于他们天真的游戏、喜乐和忧愁，不要显出毫不同情的样子，免得他们和你疏远。万不可在你脸上表露愠怒之色，唇间吐出苛厉之言。须知上帝必将这样的话语写在他的记录册中。[18]
§38
It will pay to manifest affection in your association with your children. Do not repel them by lack of sympathy in their childish sports, joys, and griefs. Never let a frown gather upon your brow or a harsh word escape your lips. God writes all these words in His book of records. {AH 309.2}[18]
§39
约束与警戒犹嫌不足——亲爱的弟兄们哪！就整个教会而论，你们已可悲地忽略了自己对于儿童和青年的责任。你们既立了些规则来约束他们，就当非常谨慎地将自己的品格中像基督的那一面，不是像撒但的那一面，显示给他们看。儿童们需要经常地照顾，亲切地疼爱。要将他们系结在你们的心上，并要不住地提醒他们记住崇爱与敬畏上帝的本分。一般作父母的既不能控制自己的情绪，就不配管理别人。你们所需要的不仅是约束，警戒你们的子女而已。你们既要存谦卑的心，与上帝同行，更当学习行公义，好怜悯。[19]
§40
Restraint and Caution Not Enough.--Dear brethren, as a church you have sadly neglected your duty toward the children and youth. While rules and restrictions are laid upon them, great care should be taken to show them the Christlike side of your character and not the satanic side. Children need constant watchcare and tender love. Bind them to your hearts, and keep the love as well as the fear of God before them. Fathers and mothers do not control their own spirit and therefore are not fit to govern others. To restrain and caution your children is not all that is required. You have yet to learn to do justly and love mercy, as well as to walk humbly with God. {AH 309.3}[19]
§41
劝告一个刚愎成性的孩子的母亲——你的孩子并不是你自己的，你不能任意对待她，因为她是主的产业。你当在她身上施行一种恒久不变的管束；要教导她，使她明白她是属于上帝的。她既受了这样的熏陶，长大之后就必加惠于与她接触的人。但明确而锐利的辨察力是不可或缺的，俾能抑制她那种企图管治你们二人，俾能随心所欲，任意而行的意向。[20]
§42
Counsel to the Mother of a Strong-willed Child.-- Your child is not your own; you cannot do with her as you like, for she is the property of the Lord. Exercise a steady persevering control over her; teach her that she belongs to God. With such a training she will grow up to be a blessing to those around her. But clear, sharp discernment will be necessary in order that you may repress her inclination to rule you both, to have her own will and way, and to do as she pleases. {AH 309.4}[20]
§43
坚定不易的管治——我曾见过许多的家庭，因家长管治过严而招致破裂，其实若彼此磋商而精诚合作，则一切都必能平安妥协地解决了。[21]
§44
Even, Steady Management.--I have seen many families shipwrecked through overmanagement on the part of their head, whereas through consultation and agreement all might have moved off harmoniously and well. {AH 310.1}[21]
§45
治家若欠坚稳必招大害，而事实上受害之深几与完全不加管理的家庭一样。常有人问：为什么一般有宗教信仰之父母的子女，往往如此任性，无礼，而悖逆呢？原因就在于家庭的训练。父母在治家的事上往往不齐心协力。[22]
§46
Unsteadiness in family government is productive of great harm, in fact is nearly as bad as no government at all. The question is often asked, Why are the children of religious parents so often headstrong, defiant, and rebellious? The reason is to be found in the home training. Too often the parents are not united in their family government. {AH 310.2}[22]
§47
变化无常的管理——一时约束极严，一时又容许原来谴责的事——实足以使儿童趋于败坏。[23]
§48
A fitful government--at one time holding the lines firmly, and at another allowing that which has been condemned--is ruination to a child. {AH 310.3}[23]
§49
父母子女间的相待之律——上帝是我们的立法者，我们的君王；父母们当自行置身于他的管理之下。这项原则一方面既禁止父母压迫子女，另一方面也不准儿女悖逆父母。主乃是满怀慈悲，大有怜悯，充满真理的。他的律法乃是圣洁、公义、良善的，而作父母或儿女的都当加以遵行。原来那应当管理父母与儿女的生活之规律，都发源于无穷之爱的圣心，而且上帝所赐的洪福必倾降于凡在家中实践他律法的父母，以及顺服这律法的子女身上。怜悯与公义相融和而产生的感化力必发挥其作用。“慈爱和诚实彼此相遇，公义和公平彼此相亲。”凡服从这种规律的家庭，必走在主的道路上，实行公平和公义。[24]
§50
Mutual Law for Parents and Children.--God is our Lawgiver and King, and parents are to place themselves under His rule. This rule forbids all oppression from parents and all disobedience from children. The Lord is full of lovingkindness, mercy, and truth. His law is holy, just, and good, and must be obeyed by parents and children. The rules which should regulate the lives of parents and children flow from a heart of infinite love, and Gods rich blessing will rest upon those parents who administer His law in their homes, and upon the children who obey this law. The combined influence of mercy and justice is to be felt. Mercy and truth are met together; righteousness and peace have kissed each other. Households under this discipline will walk in the way of the Lord, to do justice and judgment. {AH 310.4}[24]