第151章 需要忠告与指导
§1
第151章 需要忠告与指导
§2
Chapter 151—Need of Counsel and Guidance
§3
在这个危险败坏的世代，青年人必要遭遇许多试炼与引诱。不少人正在驶入危险的港口。他们很需要一位领港人。但他们却不屑于接受这个极需要的帮助，自以为有能力驾驶自己的船，却不知道这只船将会撞在暗礁之上，致使信心与幸福的丧失。他们沉迷在恋爱与婚姻，一意孤行。在这人生最关键的时期，他们需要一位忠实的顾问和无误的向导。这一切他们可以在圣经中找到。他们若不殷勤研究圣经，就会铸成大错，危害自己和他人的今生和来世的幸福。{MYP 443.1}[1]
§4
In these days of peril and corruption, the young are exposed to many trials and temptations. Many are sailing in a dangerous harbor. They need a pilot; but they scorn to accept the much-needed help, feeling that they are competent to guide their own bark, and not realizing that it is about to strike a hidden rock that may cause them to make shipwreck of faith and happiness. They are infatuated with the subject of courtship and marriage, and their principal burden is to have their own way. In this, the most important period of their lives, they need an unerring counselor, an infallible guide. This they will find in the Word of God. Unless they are diligent students of that Word, they will make grave mistakes, which will mar their happiness and that of others, both for the present and the future life.?{MYP 443.1}[1]
§5
许多人卤莽固执，疏忽圣经中智慧的劝告，没有与自我作战，去争取宝贵的胜利。骄傲和倔强使他们离开了本分和顺从的道路。青年朋友们，你们应当回顾一下过去的人生，并在上帝圣言的光照之下，诚实地考察自己的经历。你有没有凭着良知，重视圣经中有关你对父母所应尽的本分？你有没有以仁爱之心对待那自幼照顾你的慈母呢？你有没有尊重她的愿望，或是一意孤行而使她伤心呢？你所信奉的真理有否使你的内心成为圣洁呢？如果没有，你就当努力改正过去的错误。{MYP 443.2}[2]
§6
There is a disposition with many to be impetuous and headstrong. They have not heeded the wise counsel of the Word of God; they have not battled with self, and obtained precious victories; and their proud, unbending will has driven them from the path of duty and obedience. Look back over your past life, young friends, and faithfully consider your course in the light of God’s Word. Have you cherished that conscientious regard for your obligations to your parents that the Bible enjoins? Have you treated with kindness and love the mother who has cared for you from infancy? Have you?regarded her wishes, or have you brought pain and sadness to her heart by carrying out your own desires and plans? Has the truth you profess sanctified your heart, and softened and subdued your will? If not, you have close work to do to make past wrongs right.?{MYP 443.2}[2]
§7
【完美的向导】
§8
圣经提供了完美的品格标准，这部由上帝所启示，藉着圣人所写成的圣书，是人生一切境遇中的完美向导。它阐明了老年人与青年人的本分。圣经既作为人生的向导，其教训就必引人向上。它能提高心志，改善品格，使心灵得到平安与喜乐。然而有许多青年人以自己为顾问和向导，自行解决问题。这等人需要更深切地研究圣经的教训。他们必从其中看到他们对父母和弟兄所应尽的义务。第五条诫命说：“当孝敬父母，使你的日子在耶和华你上帝所赐你的地上得以长久。”又说“你们作儿女的要在主里听从父母，这是理所当然的”（弗6：1）。{MYP 444.1}[3]
§9
【A Perfect Guide】
§10
The Bible presents a perfect standard of character. This sacred book, inspired by God, and written by holy men, is a perfect guide under all circumstances of life. It sets forth distinctly the duties of both young and old. If made the guide of life, its teachings will lead the soul upward. It will elevate the mind, improve the character, and give peace and joy to the heart. But many of the young have chosen to be their own counselor and guide, and have taken their cases in their own hands. Such need to study more closely the teachings of the Bible. In its pages they will find revealed their duty to their parents and to their brethren in the faith. The fifth commandment reads, “Honor thy father and thy mother, that thy days may be long upon the land which the Lord thy God giveth thee.” Again we read, “Children, obey your parents in the Lord; for this is right.”?{MYP 444.1}[3]
§11
我们生活在末期的证兆之一，就是儿女不违背父母，忘恩负义。心存不洁。圣经中有许多叫人叫孝敬父母的教训和劝勉。它向青年人强调这个神圣的义务，就是要敬爱把他们自小养到大，现在的平安幸福又十分依赖他们的父母。在这个问题上，圣经已有明确的指示，但其中的教训却被人大大忽略了。{MYP 444.2}[4]
§12
One of the signs that we are living in the last days is that children are disobedient to parents, unthankful, unholy. The Word of God abounds in precepts and counsels enjoining respect for parents. It impresses upon the young the sacred duty of loving and cherishing those who have guided them through infancy, childhood, and youth, up to manhood and?womanhood, and who are now in a great degree dependent upon them for peace and happiness. The Bible gives no uncertain sound on this subject; nevertheless, its teachings have been greatly disregarded.?{MYP 444.2}[4]
§13
有许多教训是青年人需要学习的，其中最重要的是学习认识自己。他们应当正确地认识自己对父母所应负的责任和本分，在基督学校里不断学习如何心里柔和谦卑。他们如果敬爱孝顺自己的父母，也就必尊重教会中有经验之人的看法了。{MYP 445.1}[5]
§14
The young have many lessons to learn, and the most important one is to learn to know themselves. They should have correct ideas of their obligations and duties to their parents, and should be constantly learning in the school of Christ to be meek and lowly of heart. While they are to love and honor their parents, they are also to respect the judgment of men of experience with whom they are connected in the church.?{MYP 445.1}[5]
§15
【光明正大的行为】
§16
一个男青年与一个女青年来往交友，却背着她的父母，他就没有对她的父母履行高尚的基督徒本分。通过秘密的来往和约会，他可以赢得姑娘的芳心，但是他这样做，没有表现出上帝的儿女所应有的高贵与正直。为了达到自己的目的，他们没有光明磊落地按圣经的标准行事，这就表明他们对那些爱他们并忠实监护他们的人不诚实。在这样的情况之下，他们订立的婚约是不符合圣经的。人若引诱一个女子离开本分，使她对孝敬父母的上帝明令模糊不清，他也就不会忠实于婚姻的义务了。{MYP 445.2}[6]
§17
【Honorable Conduct】
§18
A young man who enjoys the society and wins the friendship of a young lady unknown to her parents does not act a noble Christian part toward her or toward her parents. Through secret communications and meetings he may gain an influence over her mind; but in so doing he fails to manifest that nobility and integrity of soul which every child of God will possess. In order to accomplish their ends, they act a part that is not frank and open and according to the Bible standard, and prove themselves untrue to those who love them and try to be faithful guardians over them. Marriages contracted under such influences are not according to the Word of God. He who would lead a daughter away from duty, who would confuse her ideas of God’s plain and positive commands to obey and honor her parents, is not one who would be true to the marriage obligations.?{MYP 445.2}[6]
§19
有人问：“少年人用什么洁净他的行为呢？”回答是：“要遵行你的话。”青年人若以圣经为自己的向导，就不会偏离本分和安全的道路。这部有福之书会教导他保持正直的品德，作诚实的人，不作欺哄人的事。“不可偷盗”是上帝用手指写在石版上的。但是有许多人偷窃爱情却受到了原谅。{MYP 446.1}[7]
§20
The question is asked, “Wherewithal shall a young man cleanse his way?” and the answer is given, “By taking heed thereto according to Thy word.” The young man who makes the Bible his guide need not mistake the path of duty and of safety. That blessed book will teach him to preserve his integrity of character, to be truthful, to practice no deception. “Thou shalt not steal” was written by the finger of God upon the tables of stone; yet how much underhand stealing of affections is practiced and excused.?{MYP 446.1}[7]
§21
这种秘密的恋爱和私下的交往一直继续下去，直到那毫无经验，不知后果的女子把感情从父母身上转移到那个倾心于她的男子身上；而这男子所采取的行径，本身已表明他不值得她爱。圣经谴责一切不诚实的行为，要求在任何环境下都要行为正直。凡把圣经作为自己青年时期的向导和路上之光的人，必在凡事上顺从圣经的教训。他不会为达到某一目的而干犯律法的一点一划，即使是付出重大的牺牲也在所不惜。他如果相信圣经，就必知道他若偏离严格的正直，上帝的福气是不会临到他的。虽然他可能一时顺利，但终必自食其果。{MYP 446.2}[8]
§22
A deceptive courtship is maintained, private communications are kept up, until the affections of one who is inexperienced, and knows not whereunto these things may grow, are in a measure withdrawn from her parents and placed upon him who shows by the very course he pursues that he is unworthy of her love. The Bible condemns every species of dishonesty and demands right-doing under all circumstances. He who makes the Bible the guide of his youth, the light of his path, will obey its teachings in all things. He will not transgress one jot or tittle of the law in order to accomplish any object, even if he has to make great sacrifices in consequence. If he believes the Bible, he knows that the blessing of God will not rest upon him if he departs from the strict path of rectitude. Although he may appear for a time to prosper, he will surely reap the fruit of his doings.?{MYP 446.2}[8]
§23
上帝的咒诅临到现今许多不适时、不合理的婚姻。如果圣经只是轻描淡写，含糊其词地论及这些问题，那末今日许多青年所采取的恋爱方式或许就情有可原了。但是圣经的要求并不是片面的命令。他们要求思想，言语和行为的完全纯洁。我们应当感谢上帝，因为祂的话是脚前的灯。每一个人都不必偏离本分的道路。青年人应当养成查考圣经，注意其中劝勉的习惯，因为可悲的错误往往是因偏离圣经的教训而造成的。{MYP 446.3}[9]
§24
The curse of God rests upon many of the ill-timed, inappropriate connections that are formed in this age of the world. If the Bible left these questions in a vague uncertain light, then the?course that many youth of today are pursuing in their attachments for one another would be more excusable. But the requirements of the Bible are not half-way injunctions; they demand perfect purity of thought, of word, and of deed. We are grateful to God that His Word is a light to the feet, and that none need mistake the path of duty. The young should make it a business to consult its pages and heed its counsels; for sad mistakes are always made in departing from its precepts.?{MYP 446.3}[9]
§25
【需要准确的判断力】
§26
婚姻的问题需要以冷静的理智和谨慎的判断来加以考虑。在采取结婚的步骤之前，要以圣经作为顾问。但是人们在这件事上一般都为感情所左右。许多时候，恋情主宰了人的思想，把人带到注定败亡的地步。青年人在这个问题上，往往比在其他事情上更少表现出智慧，也不肯更为理性。婚姻问题对他们似乎有一种特殊的魅力。他们没有把自己交托给上帝。他们的理性为感情所胜。他们秘密行事，唯恐有人来干涉他们的计划。{MYP 447.1}[10]
§27
【Need of Sound Judgment】
§28
If there is any subject that should be considered with calm reason and unimpassioned judgment, it is the subject of marriage. If ever the Bible is needed as a counselor, it is before taking a step that binds persons together for life. But the prevailing sentiment is that in this matter the feelings are to be the guide; and in too many cases lovesick sentimentalism takes the helm and guides to certain ruin. It is here that the youth show less intelligence than on any other subject; it is here that they refuse to be reasoned with. The question of marriage seems to have a bewitching power over them. They do not submit themselves to God. Their senses are enchained, and they move forward in secretiveness, as if fearful that their plans would be interfered with by some one.?{MYP 447.1}[10]
§29
在恋爱和婚姻上不采取光明正大的方式，乃是许多不幸的原因，其不幸的程度只有上帝才了解。千万人的心灵就是触礁在这块礁石上。一些自命为基督徒的人，品行虽然端方，在其他问题上似乎也很聪明，但在婚事上却铸成大错，表显出不可理喻的固执和倔强的意志。他们被人的感情和冲动所支配，不愿意查考圣经，与上帝保持密切的联系。{MYP 447.2}[11]
§30
The underhand way in which courtships and marriages are carried on is the cause of a great amount of misery, the full extent of which is known only to God. On this rock thousands have made shipwreck of their souls. Professed Christians, whose lives are?marked with integrity, and who seem sensible upon every other subject, make fearful mistakes here. They manifest a set, determined will that reason cannot change. They become so fascinated with human feelings and impulses that they have no desire to search the Bible and come into close relationship with God.?{MYP 447.2}[11]
§31
撒但十分熟悉他所诱惑的对象。他千方百计地用他邪恶的智慧引诱人灭亡。他关注着人所采取的每一个步骤，并提供许多建议。人们往往采纳这些建议，而不接受上帝的圣言的劝导。这个精细编织的危险罗网，正准备去网住一些年轻而不提防的人。罗网上往往罩上光明的外衣。凡被网住的人，终必因重重忧伤而心碎肠断，结果我们到处看到有人沉沦。{MYP 448.1}[12]
§32
Satan knows just what elements he has to deal with, and he displays his infernal wisdom in various devices to entrap souls to their ruin. He watches every step that is taken, and makes many suggestions, and often these suggestions are followed rather than the counsel of God’s Word. This finely woven, dangerous net is skillfully prepared to entangle the young and unwary. It may often be disguised under a covering of light; but those who become its victims pierce themselves through with many sorrows. As the result, we see wrecks of humanity everywhere.?{MYP 448.1}[12]
§33
【请教父母】
§34
我们的青年什么时候才会懂事呢？这种情形还要延续多久呢？作儿女的难道都只顾自己的意愿与爱好，而不顾父母的劝告和意见吗？有些人似乎从来没有考虑他们父母的意图和愿望，也不重视他们成熟的判断。自私的意愿杜绝了他们孝敬父母的心思。我们应当提醒青年人注意这件事。第五诫是唯一带应许的诫命，却遭到了忽视，甚至因恋人的意愿而完全被置之不理。许多青年人记录在案的的罪，就是轻视母亲的爱和不尊重父亲的关怀。{MYP 448.2}[13]
§35
【Parents to Be Consulted】
§36
When will our youth be wise? How long will this kind of work go on? Shall children consult only their own desires and inclinations, irrespective of the advice and judgment of their parents? Some seem never to bestow a thought upon their parents’ wishes or preferences, nor to regard their matured judgment. Selfishness has closed the door of their hearts to filial affection. The minds of the young need to be aroused in regard to this matter. The fifth commandment is the only commandment to which is annexed a promise; but it is held lightly, and is even positively ignored by the lover’s claim.?Slighting a mother’s love, dishonoring a father’s care, are sins that stand registered against many youth.?{MYP 448.2}[13]
§37
与这个问题有关的最大错误之一，就是对于年轻无经验之人的恋爱不闻不问，对他们的爱情不加干涉。其实这个问题最需要处处留意。借鉴他人的经验和冷静仔细的权衡是极其重要的。可是大多数人对这个问题却过于疏忽了。{MYP 449.1}[14]
§38
One of the greatest errors connected with this subject is that the young and inexperienced must not have their affections disturbed, that there must be no interference in their love experience. If there ever was a subject that needed to be viewed from every standpoint, it is this. The aid of the experience of others, and a calm, careful weighing of the matter on both sides, is positively essential. It is a subject that is treated altogether too lightly by the great majority of people.?{MYP 449.1}[14]
§39
青年朋友们，你们要以上帝和你敬畏上帝的父母作为你的顾问，要为这件事情祷告。你要权衡将作你终身伴侣之人的的各样情操和其性格的每一倾向。你所要采取的步骤是一生中最重要的一步，决不可操之过急。你可以恋爱，但不要盲目恋爱。{MYP 449.2}[15]
§40
Take God and your God-fearing parents into your counsel, young friends. Pray over the matter. Weigh every sentiment, and watch every development of character in the one with whom you think to link your life destiny. The step you are about to take is one of the most important in your life, and should not be taken hastily. While you may love, do not love blindly.?{MYP 449.2}[15]
§41
要慎重考虑一下你婚后的生活是幸福的呢，还是不和谐和糟糕的呢？要想到以下的问题：这样的结合能帮助我行走天路吗？会不会增进我们对上帝的爱呢？会不会扩大我今生的用途呢？这些考虑都没有什么问题了，你再本着敬畏上帝的心采取行动。{MYP 449.3}[16]
§42
Examine carefully to see if your married life would be happy, or inharmonious and wretched. Let the questions be raised, Will this union help me heavenward? will it increase my love for God? and will it enlarge my sphere of usefulness in this life? If these reflections present no drawback, then in the fear of God move forward.?{MYP 449.3}[16]
§43
但是如果你在还没有充分了解婚姻对象的品格之前就已订婚了，也不要以为你就非得履行婚约，与你所不敬不爱的人结合不可。订立婚约固然应该十分谨慎，但是与其象许多人那样在婚后分离，还不如在婚前解除婚约。{MYP 449.4}[17]
§44
But even if an engagement has been entered into without a full understanding of the character of the one with whom you intend to unite, do not think that the engagement makes it a positive necessity for you to take upon yourself the marriage?vow, and link yourself for life to one whom you cannot love and respect. Be very careful how you enter into conditional engagements; but better, far better, break the engagement before marriage than separate afterward, as many do.?{MYP 449.4}[17]
§45
【以对待母亲的态度作为参考】
§46
真正的爱是一株需要培养的树木。凡希望获得平安快乐的婚姻，避免将来不幸和痛苦的女子，应在定亲之前，了解对方的母亲是否健在？她的品性如何？他是否认识到对于母亲的责任？能否关心她的愿望和幸福？如果他不孝敬自己的母亲，又如何能向她的妻子表现尊重，爱心，仁慈和关怀呢？新婚的兴奋过去之后，他依然爱我吗？他能宽容我的过失，或是吹毛求疵，蛮横无理地对待我呢？真正的爱情能宽恕许多过失，因为爱是不计较过错的。{MYP 450.1}[18]
§47
【Treatment of Mother an Index】
§48
True love is a plant that needs culture. Let the woman who desires a peaceful, happy union, who would escape future misery and sorrow, inquire before she yields her affections, Has my lover a mother? What is the stamp of her character? Does he recognize his obligations to her? Is he mindful of her wishes and happiness? If he does not respect and honor his mother, will he manifest respect and love, kindness and attention, toward his wife? When the novelty of marriage is over, will he love me still? Will he be patient with my mistakes, or will he be critical, overbearing, and dictatorial? True affection will overlook many mistakes; love will not discern them.?{MYP 450.1}[18]
§49
【感情的冲动不可靠】
§50
青年人太相信感情的冲动了。他们不要轻易决定自己的终生大事，也不要太容易被恋人迷人的外表所吸引。现代的恋爱方式，有其欺骗伪善的一面，与人类的仇敌有关，而与上帝无关。在这个问题上，非常需要理性，但人们作事却很少出于理性。{MYP 450.2}[19]
§51
【Impulse Not Reliable】
§52
The youth trust altogether too much to impulse. They should not give themselves away too easily, nor be captivated too readily by the winning exterior of the lover. Courtship, as carried on in this age, is a scheme of deception and hypocrisy, with which the enemy of souls has far more to do than the Lord. Good common sense is needed here if anywhere; but the fact is, it has little to do in the matter.?{MYP 450.2}[19]
§53
青年人如果肯亲近父母，信赖父母，向他们倾吐自己的喜乐与忧愁，就必免去将来的许多忧苦。当他们感到为难，不知所措的时候，就当把事情告诉自己的父母，征求他们的意见。谁能象敬虔的父母那样会精明地指出儿女的危险呢？谁能象他们那么了解儿女的性情呢？{MYP 450.3}[20]
§54
If children would be more familiar with their parents, if they would confide in them, and unburden?to them their joys and sorrows, they would save themselves many a future heartache. When perplexed to know what course is right, let them lay the matter just as they view it before their parents, and ask advice of them. Who are so well calculated to point out their dangers as godly parents? Who can understand their peculiar temperaments so well as they??{MYP 450.3}[20]
§55
青年基督徒必视他们敬畏上帝之父母的宠爱和赞赏过于一切地上的福分。父母能够同情子女，与他们一起为他们祷告，求上帝保护和引导他们。最重要的，父母要向儿女指出那位永远可靠的朋友和顾问。祂必体恤他们的软弱，因为祂凡事受过试探与我们一样，只是祂没有犯罪。祂知道怎样搭救那受试探的人。——《评论与通讯》1886年1月26日{MYP 451.1}[21]
§56
Children who are Christians will esteem above every earthly blessing the love and approbation of their God-fearing parents. The parents can sympathize with the children, and pray for and with them that God will shield and guide them. Above everything else they will point them to their never-failing Friend and Counselor, who will be touched with the feeling of their infirmities. He who was tempted in all points like as we are, yet without sin, knows how to succor those who are tempted.—The Review and Herald, January 26, 1886.?{MYP 451.1}[21]
§57
【上帝的爱】
§58
在你们的终身结合中，爱情应当增进彼此的幸福，各人都为对方的幸福服务。这是上帝对于你们的旨意。你们虽已结合为一时，但不要让各人的个性消失在对方之中，因为你们的个性是属于上帝的。……{MYP 451.2}[22]
§59
【Divine Love】
§60
In your life union your affections are to be tributary to each other’s happiness. Each is to minister to the happiness of the other. This is the will of God concerning you. But while you are to blend as one, neither of you is to lose his or her individuality in the other. God is the owner of your individuality....?{MYP 451.2}[22]
§61
人既为上帝而活，就要把最美好、最崇高的感情奉献给祂。你有没有把你最大的爱潮涌向为你舍命的主吗？如果有的话，你们相互的爱情就必与上天的爱相同了。——《教会证言》卷七45，46页{MYP 451.3}[23]
§62
Living for God, the soul sends forth to Him its best and highest affections. Is the greatest outflow of your love toward Him who died for you? If it is, your love for each other will be after heaven’s order.—Testimonies for the Church 7:45, 46.?{MYP 451.3}[23]