第22章 夫妻关系
§1
第22章 夫妻关系
§2
Chap. 22—The Relationship Between Husband and Wife
§3
凡视婚姻关系为上帝神圣制度之一，且为祂的圣洁律法所维护的人，必受理智的指示所约束。{CCh 133.1}[1]
§4
Those who regard the marriage relation as one of God’s sacred ordinances, guarded by His holy precept, will be controlled by the dictates of reason.?{CCh 133.1}[1]
§5
耶稣并没有强迫任何人独身。祂来并不是要破坏婚姻的神圣关系，而是要提高它并使它恢复到原来的圣洁状态。耶稣高兴地看待由圣洁无私的爱作主的家庭关系。{CCh 133.2}[2]
§6
Jesus did not enforce celibacy upon any class of men. He came not to destroy the sacred relationship of marriage, but to exalt it and restore it to its original sanctity. He looks with pleasure upon the family relationship where sacred and unselfish love bears sway.?{CCh 133.2}[2]
§7
【婚姻是合法而圣洁的】
§8
吃、喝、嫁、娶本身并不是罪。婚姻在挪亚的时代是合法的，在今日也是合法的，只要处理得当，不行之过度。但是在挪亚的时代，人们结婚不请教上帝，或寻求祂的指导和教训。?{CCh 133.3}[3]
§9
【Marriage Is Lawful and Holy】
§10
There is in itself no sin in eating and drinking, or in marrying and giving in marriage. It was lawful to marry in the time of Noah, and it is lawful to marry now, if that which is lawful is properly treated and not carried to sinful excess. But in the days of Noah men married without consulting God or seeking His guidance and counsel.?{CCh 133.3}[3]
§11
人生的一切关系都是变幻无常的。这一事实应当对我们的言行有一种制约的作用。在挪亚的时代，由于放纵和过度关注那如果用得适当原是合法的事，以致在上帝面前嫁娶也成为罪恶了。在现今的世代，许多人因过度专注嫁娶和婚姻的关系而丧失灵魂。{CCh 133.4}[4]
§12
The fact that all the relations of life are of a transitory nature should have a modifying influence on all we do and say. In Noah’s day it was the inordinate, excessive love of that which in itself was lawful, when properly used, that made marriage sinful before God. There are many who are losing their souls in this age of the world by becoming absorbed in the thoughts of marriage and in the marriage relation itself.?{CCh 133.4}[4]
§13
婚姻关系是神圣的，但在这个堕落的世代，它却被用来遮掩各种各样卑劣污秽的事。婚姻被滥用，且成了构成末日征兆的一种罪行，就象洪水前的人们使婚姻成了一种罪行一样。只有当婚姻的神圣性质和要求被人理解时，它才能得到上天的嘉许，结果对于双方才会幸福，上帝也会因此得荣耀。{CCh 133.5}[5]
§14
The marriage relation is holy, but in this degenerate age it covers vileness of every description. It is abused and has become a crime which now constitutes one of the signs of the last days, even as marriages, managed as they were previous to the Flood, were then a crime. When the sacred nature and the claims of marriage are understood, it will even now be approved of Heaven; and the result will be happiness to both parties, and God will be glorified.?{CCh 133.5}[5]
§15
【婚姻的权利】
§16
自称是基督徒的人应恰当地考虑婚姻关系每项权利的结果，且以圣化的原则作为每一行动的根据。{CCh 133.6}[6]
§17
【The Privileges of Marriage】
§18
Those professing to be Christians should duly consider the result of every privilege of the marriage relation, and sanctified principle should be the basis of every action.?{CCh 133.6}[6]
§19
在许多情形下，父母们滥用婚姻的权利，恣情纵欲，增强了自己的兽性情欲。{CCh 133.7}[7]
§20
In very many cases the parents have abused their marriage privileges, and by indulgence have strengthened their animal passions.?{CCh 133.7}[7]
§21
（怀夫人在另一个场合说到“家庭关系的隐私与权利”）?{CCh 133.8}[8]
§22
[On another occasion Mrs. White speaks of the “privacy and privileges of the family relation.”]?{CCh 133.8}[8]
§23
合法的事，行之过度便会酿成大罪。{CCh 134.1}[9]
§24
It is carrying that which is lawful to excess that makes it a grievous sin.?{CCh 134.1}[9]
§25
许多父母没有婚后生活所应有的知识。他们没有谨慎自守，以免撒但趁机控制他们的心思及生活。他们看不出上帝要求他们在婚后生活的任何方面都当节制。只有很少的人认识到，管束自己的情欲，也是宗教本分之一。他们既已自己选择结婚对象，就因而推理婚姻准许人放纵低级情欲。甚至那些自命敬虔的男女，也放松了肉体情欲的控制。他们没有想到自己浪费生命活力，削弱自己对生活的把握，使整个身体系统衰败，这一切上帝都是要他们负责的。?{CCh 134.2}[10]
§26
Many parents do not obtain the knowledge that they should in the married life. They are not guarded lest Satan take advantage of them and control their minds and their lives. They do not see that God requires them to control their married lives from any excesses. But very few feel it to be a religious duty to govern their passions. They have united themselves in marriage to the object of their choice and, therefore, reason that marriage sanctifies the indulgence of the baser passions. Even men and women professing godliness give loose rein to their lustful passions and have no thought that God holds them accountable for the expenditure of vital energy, which weakens their hold on life and enervates the entire system.?{CCh 134.2}[10]
§27
【实行克己与节制】
§28
唉，惟愿我能使众人明白，他们在上帝面前有责任保持自己身心的机能处于最佳状态，好为他们的创造主献上完美的服务！但愿基督化的妻子务要约束言语和行为，以免煽动丈夫的兽欲。很多人在这方面根本没有多余的精力可以虚耗了。他们从年轻时代，就放纵兽欲，削弱了脑力，损害了体质。克己节制应作为他们婚姻生活的座右铭。{CCh 134.3}[11]
§29
【Practice Self-Denial and Temperance】
§30
Oh, that I could make all understand their obligation to God to preserve the mental and physical organism in the best condition to render perfect service to their Maker! Let the Christian wife refrain, both in word and act, from exciting the animal passions of her husband. Many have no strength at all to waste in this direction. From their youth up they have weakened the brain and sapped the constitution by the gratification of animal passions. Self-denial and temperance should be the watchword in their married life.?{CCh 134.3}[11]
§31
我们对上帝负有严肃的职责，要保持心灵的纯洁和身体的健康，以便造福人群，向上帝献上完美的服务。使徒曾发出警戒的话说：“所以不要容罪在你们必死的身子上作主，使你们顺从身子的私欲”（罗6:12）。他敦促我们前进，告诉我们：“凡较力争胜的，诸事都有节制”（林前9:25）。他劝导凡自称为基督徒的，要将自己的身体献上，“当作活祭，是圣洁的，是上帝所喜悦的”（罗12:1）。他说：“我是攻克己身，叫身服我；恐怕我传福音给别人，自己反被弃绝了”（林前9:27）。?{CCh 134.4}[12]
§32
We are under solemn obligations to God to keep the spirit pure and the body healthy, that we may be a benefit to humanity and render to God perfect service. The apostle utters these words of warning: “Let not sin therefore reign in your mortal body, that ye should obey it in the lusts thereof.” He urges us onward by telling us that “every man that striveth for the mastery is temperate in all things.” He exhorts all who call themselves Christians to present their bodies “a living sacrifice, holy, acceptable unto God.” He says: “I keep under my body, and bring it into subjection: lest that by any means, when I have preached to others, I myself should be a castaway.”?{CCh 134.4}[12]
§33
纯洁的爱并不促使人把妻子当作泄欲的工具。那叫人放纵的，乃是兽欲。现今照着使徒所提示的情形，表现他们爱情的人是何其少啊！“正如基督爱教会，为教会舍己……（不使教会污秽，但）把教会洗净，成为圣洁……乃是圣洁没有瑕疵的”（弗5:25-27）。在婚姻关系中，这种性质的爱才能被上帝认为是神圣的。爱是一种纯洁神圣的原则，但肉体情欲却决不受约束，也不容理性的指挥和管束。它不明结局，也不辨因果。?{CCh 134.5}[13]
§34
It is not pure love which actuates a man to make his wife an instrument to minister to his lust. It is the animal passions which clamor for indulgence. How few men show their love in the manner specified by the apostle: “Even as Christ also loved the church, and gave Himself for it; that He might [not pollute it, but] sanctify and cleanse it; ... that it should be holy and without blemish.” This is the quality of love in the marriage relation which God recognizes as holy. Love is a pure and holy principle, but lustful passion will not admit of restraint and will not be dictated to or controlled by reason. It is blind to consequences; it will not reason from cause to effect.?{CCh 134.5}[13]
§35
【撒但设法削弱人的自制力】
§36
撒但设法降低纯洁的标准，削弱那些进入婚姻关系之人的自制力，因为他知道，在低级情欲占上风的时候，道德力就必越来越弱，他就不必担心他们在属灵上会有长进了。他也知道，这是把他可恨的形像印在他们后代身上的最好办法，他可以这样塑造他们的品格，甚至比塑造父母们的品格更容易。?{CCh 134.6}[14]
§37
【Satan Seeks to Weaken Self-Control】
§38
Satan seeks to lower the standard of purity and to weaken the self-control of those who enter the marriage relation, because he knows?that while the baser passions are in the ascendancy, the moral powers grow steadily weaker, and he need have no concern as to their spiritual growth. He knows, too, that in no way can he better stamp his own hateful image upon their offspring, and that he can thus mold their character even more readily than he can the character of the parents.?{CCh 134.6}[14]
§39
男人女人们啊，你们总有一天要明白什么是肉欲，以及满足肉欲有何后果了。有时在婚姻关系之内的情欲，其性质之卑劣，亦不下于在婚姻关系之外。?{CCh 135.1}[15]
§40
Men and women, you will one day learn what is lust and the result of its gratification. Passion of just as base a quality may be found in the marriage relation as outside of it.?{CCh 135.1}[15]
§41
放纵低级情欲的后果是什么呢？卧室原为上帝的天使主管之处，却因不圣洁的行为而成为不圣洁了。由于可耻的兽欲支配一切，身体败坏了；可憎的恶习导致可憎的疾病。上帝所赐的福惠反成了咒诅。{CCh 135.2}[16]
§42
What is the result of giving loose rein to the lower passions? The bedchamber, where angels of God should preside, is made unholy by unholy practices. And because shameful animalism rules, bodies are corrupted; loathsome practices lead to loathsome diseases. That which God has given as a blessing is made a curse.?{CCh 135.2}[16]
§43
纵欲过度，足以摧毁爱慕敬虔活动之心，夺去保养身体所必需的脑力，最能耗损人的活力。任何妇女，都不应当协助她的丈夫做这种自我毁灭的事情。她若是有智慧并真正爱她的丈夫，就决不会这么做。?{CCh 135.3}[17]
§44
Sexual excess will effectually destroy a love for devotional exercises, will take from the brain the substance needed to nourish the system, and will most effectively exhaust the vitality. No woman should aid her husband in this work of self-destruction. She will not do it if she is enlightened and has true love for him.?{CCh 135.3}[17]
§45
兽欲越放纵就越强，而要求放纵之呼声也越暴烈。愿敬畏上帝的男女都认清自己的本分。许多自称基督徒的人正是因为这方面的不节制而导致神经和大脑的麻痹。{CCh 135.4}[18]
§46
The more the animal passions are indulged, the stronger do they become, and the more violent will be their clamors for indulgence. Let God-fearing men and women awake to their duty. Many professed Christians are suffering with paralysis of nerve and brain because of their intemperance in this direction.?{CCh 135.4}[18]
§47
【丈夫应当体谅】
§48
丈夫要谨慎、关怀、忍耐、忠诚和体贴。他们应当表显出爱心和同情。他们如果遵行基督的话语，他们的爱就不会带有低级、世俗、色情的性质，以致败坏自己的身体，使妻子衰弱多病。他们不会一面放纵卑劣的情欲，一面在妻子的耳边唠叨，要她们凡事顺服丈夫了。丈夫若有每一个真正的基督徒都必须具有的高贵的品格，纯洁的心思，高尚的意念，就必在婚姻关系中表明出来。他若以基督的心为心，就不会摧残身体，却要满怀温柔的爱，在基督里面竭力达到最高的标准。{CCh 135.5}[19]
§49
【Husbands to Be Considerate】
§50
Husbands should be careful, attentive, constant, faithful, and compassionate. They should manifest love and sympathy. If they fulfill the words of Christ, their love will not be of a base, earthly, sensual character that will lead to the destruction of their own bodies and bring upon their wives debility and disease. They will not indulge in the gratification of base passions, while ringing in the ears of their wives that they must be subject to the husband in everything. When the husband has the nobility of character, purity of heart, elevation of mind that every true Christian must possess, it will be made manifest in the marriage relation. If he has the mind of Christ, he will not be a destroyer of the body, but will be full of tender love, seeking to reach the highest standard in Christ.?{CCh 135.5}[19]
§51
妻子若一味忍让，作丈夫的奴隶，满足他卑劣的情欲，没有一个男人会真正爱她的。她既然被动地屈从，就在丈夫眼中失去了以往的价值。他既看见她在一切事上都从高贵的降为下流，不久他就猜疑她也会温顺地忍受别人污辱，就象他对待她那样。他会怀疑她的忠贞和纯洁，厌弃她，转而寻找新的对象来激发强化他邪恶的欲火。上帝的律法不再受尊重了。这些人比禽兽更坏，他们乃是徒具人形的恶魔，他们不知道真实圣洁爱情的高尚尊贵原则。{CCh 135.6}[20]
§52
No man can truly love his wife when she will patiently submit to become his slave and minister to his depraved passions. In her passive submission she loses the value she once possessed in his eyes. He sees her dragged down from everything elevating to a low level, and soon he suspects that she will as tamely submit to be degraded by another as by himself. He doubts her constancy and purity, tires of her, and seeks new objects to arouse and intensify his hellish passions. The law of God is not regarded. These men are worse than brutes; they are demons in?human form. They are unacquainted with the elevating, ennobling principles of true, sanctified love.?{CCh 135.6}[20]
§53
妻子也会猜忌丈夫，怀疑他一有机会就向其他女人献殷勤，好像对她一样。她看到他并没有受良知或敬畏上帝之心所约束；这一切神圣的藩篱都已被肉体的情欲所破坏；在丈夫身上一切像上帝的品性，都成了卑劣兽欲的奴隶。?{CCh 136.1}[21]
§54
The wife also becomes jealous of the husband and suspects that if opportunity should offer, he would just as readily pay his addresses to another as to her. She sees that he is not controlled by conscience or the fear of God; all these sanctified barriers are broken down by lustful passions; all that is Godlike in the husband is made the servant of low, brutish lust.?{CCh 136.1}[21]
§55
【在无理的要求面前】
§56
现今所要解决的问题，就是作妻子的在见到丈夫只受卑贱情欲的支配之时，她的理性及判断力指示她，若如此行，便要摧残自己的身体，就是上帝命令要她保持圣洁尊贵，而留为献给上帝的活祭，在此情形之下，她是否要觉得有完全盲从丈夫之要求的义务呢？ {CCh 136.2}[22]
§57
【When Unreasonable Demands Are Made】
§58
The matter now to be settled is: Shall the wife feel bound to yield implicitly to the demands of her husband when she sees that nothing but base passions control him, and when her reason and judgment are convinced that she does it to the injury of her body, which God has enjoined upon her to possess in sanctification and honor, to preserve as a living sacrifice to God??{CCh 136.2}[22]
§59
妻子牺牲自己的健康及生命以满足丈夫的兽欲，这并不是出于纯洁神圣的爱情。她若有真实的爱情和智慧，就当设法转移丈夫那只求满足肉欲的心思，去考虑那些有利害关系的属灵之事，使他达到高尚的属灵意境。若要不糟蹋自己的身体，去顺从丈夫的过度情欲，这事需要谦卑而亲切的恳劝，甚至冒着失去丈夫欢心的危险。她应当用亲爱温柔的方式提醒丈夫说，上帝对于她整个的人有最先及最高的主权，她不能忽视这等主权，因为她在上帝的大日要为此交账。{CCh 136.3}[23]
§60
It is not pure, holy love which leads the wife to gratify the animal propensities of her husband at the expense of health and life. If she possesses true love and wisdom, she will seek to divert his mind from the gratification of lustful passions to high and spiritual themes by dwelling upon interesting spiritual subjects. It may be necessary to humbly and affectionately urge, even at the risk of his displeasure, that she cannot debase her body by yielding to sexual excess. She should, in a tender, kind manner, remind him that God has the first and highest claim upon her entire being, and that she cannot disregard this claim, for she will be held accountable in the great day of God.?{CCh 136.3}[23]
§61
妻子若能使自己的情感升华，在圣洁尊贵之中保持文雅的妇道尊严，就可大量发挥其贤明的感化力，使丈夫成圣，从而完成她的高尚使命。这样做，她便一举两得，同时救了丈夫和自己。这事十分微妙，十分难于处理，需要多用智慧与忍耐，以及道德勇气和坚忍。在祷告中可以求得能力及恩惠。应当以真诚的爱作为心中主宰的原则，并只以爱上帝和爱丈夫的心，作为行动的正当根据。?{CCh 136.4}[24]
§62
If she will elevate her affections, and in sanctification and honor preserve her refined, womanly dignity, woman can do much by her judicious influence to sanctify her husband, and thus fulfill her high mission. In so doing she can save both her husband and herself, thus performing a double work. In this matter, so delicate and so difficult to manage, much wisdom and patience are necessary, as well as moral courage and fortitude. Strength and grace can be found in prayer. Sincere love is to be the ruling principle of the heart. Love to God and love to the husband can alone be the right ground of action.?{CCh 136.4}[24]
§63
当妻子让自己的身心受丈夫的控制，在凡事上顺服他的意志，牺牲自己的良心，尊严，甚至是个性的时候，她就丧失了发挥她应有强大为善的影响、使她的丈夫得到提高的机会。她本来能软化他刚硬的性情；她圣洁的感化力也能高雅纯洁地发挥出来，使他努力控制自己的情欲，更加具有属灵的心志。这样，他们就都能与上帝的性情有分，得以脱离世上从情欲来的败坏。人的感化力可以大到足以引导人心思考高尚尊贵的题旨，超越未蒙恩典更新之心所自然追求的低级情欲的放纵。当兽欲成了丈夫情爱的主要基础，并支配他的行动时，妻子若为博取丈夫的欢心而迎合他的标准，就不蒙上帝喜悦了；因为她没有在丈夫身上发挥圣洁的影响。她若觉得必须毫无抗议地顺从他的兽欲，那她就是不明白自己对他和对上帝的本分。{CCh 136.5}[25]
§64
When the wife yields her body and mind to the control of her husband, being passive to his will in all things, sacrificing her conscience, her dignity, and even her identity, she loses the opportunity of exerting that mighty influence for good which she should possess to elevate her husband. She could soften his stern nature, and her sanctifying influence could be exerted in a manner to refine and purify, leading him to strive earnestly to govern his passions and be more spiritually minded, that they might be partakers together of the divine nature, having escaped the corruption that is in the world through lust. The power of influence can be great to lead the mind to high and noble themes, above the low, sensual indulgences for which the heart unrenewed by grace?naturally seeks. If the wife feels that in order to please her husband she must come down to his standard, when animal passion is the principal basis of his love and controls his actions, she displeases God; for she fails to exert a sanctifying influence upon her husband. If she feels that she must submit to his animal passions without a word of remonstrance, she does not understand her duty to him or to her God.?{CCh 136.5}[25]
§65
【你们是用重价买来的】
§66
低级情欲在身体中有地位，并且藉着身体行事。“肉体”、“属肉体的”、或“肉体的私欲”等词，包含低级败坏的本性；肉体本身并不能行事与上帝的旨意相反。我们受命要钉死肉体和肉体的邪情私欲。我们要怎么做这事呢？我们要苦待己身吗？不是的；而是要治死犯罪的试探。败坏的思想要被根除净尽。要将所有的心意夺回，使之顺服耶稣基督。一切兽性倾向都要服从心灵更高的能力。爱上帝的心必须完全作主；基督必须独自占据完整的宝座。我们的身体当被视为祂所赎回的产业。全身百体都要成为义的器具献给上帝。（AH 121-128）{CCh 137.1}[26]
§67
【Ye Are Bought With a Price】
§68
The lower passions have their seat in the body and work through it. The words “flesh” or “fleshly” or “carnal lusts” embrace the lower, corrupt nature; the flesh of itself cannot act contrary to the will of God. We are commanded to crucify the flesh, with the affections and lusts. How shall we do it? Shall we inflict pain on the body? No; but put to death the temptation to sin. The corrupt thought is to be expelled. Every thought is to be brought into captivity to Jesus Christ. All animal propensities are to be subjected to the higher powers of the soul. The love of God must reign supreme; Christ must occupy an undivided throne. Our bodies are to be regarded as His purchased possession. The members of the body are to become the instruments of righteousness.{CCh 137.1}[26]